Mark Gray’s main pleasure in life was feeding rats to his pet python. He kept the python in a blocked-off room in the old house in which he lived alone. Each mealtime, he would put the rat in a narrow tunnel he had rigged. At the end of the tunnel was an opening. The rat, … Читать далее
Samantha: Good morning. I had a few questions about buying a bus ticket. Do I need to buy one In advance? Agent: You can, but it’s not necessary. You just need to arrive at the Terminal at least an hour before the scheduled departure time to buy your ticket. Boarding begins about 15 to 30 … Читать далее
Raul: What are the Chances that Rob will be here on time? Tiffany: I’d say it’s Fifty-fifty. You never know. He might surprise us and be early. Raul: Fat chance of that happening. I’ve known him for three years and if I had To stake my life on whether he’ll arrive early or not, I’d … Читать далее
Claire: What are you doing with all those law books? I thought you retired 20 years ago. Ray: I’m preparing for my Mental competency hearing. Claire: Mental competency hearing? But your mind is as Sharp as it has ever been. Ray: That’s not what my children think. They are going to court to prove my … Читать далее
Isaac: Can you Keep it down in there? I’m trying to write a song. Brittany: You are? What kind of song? Isaac: It’s None of your business. Brittany: Come on. Tell me. Isaac: It’s for Melanie. Brittany: Oh, it’s a Love song. That’s so romantic. Are you going To serenade her? Isaac: Maybe. Now leave … Читать далее
Christine: What do you think of this one? Eric: We’re here to buy hats To protect us from the sun while we’re on vacation. Do you think a Beret will do that? Christine: No, but it looks great on me, don’t you think? Isn’t it great to be getting away to the beach in the … Читать далее
Diana: You’ve reached Customer service for Bully Services. How may I help you today? Phillip: I’d like to Cancel my service. Diana: Why do you want to cancel? Phillip: I’m Switching to another company with cheaper services. I’m no longer Under contract so there should be no Early-termination penalties. Diana: Let’s take a look at … Читать далее
Our family decided to take a Road trip across the country this year. The kids were really excited and my oldest son wanted to help Navigate. Before the trip, we looked at the Road maps and decided on our Route and the Points of interest we would try to see. Since we wouldn’t be taking … Читать далее
When the Caribbean state was no longer able to afford pesticides — which have been linked with declining bee populations — it made a virtue out of a necessity. Long known for its cigars and rum, Cuba has added organic honey to its list of key agricultural exports, creating a buzz among farmers as pesticide … Читать далее
Mike: Thanks a lot for agreeing to help me plan the Block party. Susan: Oh, I’m happy to help. I’m surprised you didn’t ask Bree. She’s so good at planning parties. Mike: I thought about it, but I was afraid she would turn it into a Cocktail party or something. Susan: Yeah, I see what … Читать далее
Carin: We’re going to be late for school. Hurry up! Hwan: I’m not going to school today. I’m sick. Carin: You’re not sick. You’re Playing hooky. You’re not going To put one over on Mom. She’ll know you’re Faking. Get up! Let’s go! Hwan: No, she won’t, and why are you Giving me such a … Читать далее
Adelia: When I created this writing Contest, I had no idea that we would get so many Entries. Omar: Good thing you have an Impartial panel of judges to help you select the winner. Adelia: Yes, good thing. I’m really grateful to all of you for giving up your time to help. Omar: What Criteria … Читать далее
Cheech: Is this your old Yearbook? Boo: Yeah, I found it while cleaning out my closet. Cheech: Look at your picture! You look like you were an Honor roll student. Boo: Don’t be fooled. I was just an average student, not the Valedictorian, but not a Dropout either. Cheech: Who is that? She’s very pretty. … Читать далее
Joanne Chesimard aka Assata Shakur, Tupac Shakur. Joanne Chesimard, a. k. a. Assata Shakur, was convicted of murder in 1977. Tupac Shakur’s godmother has been placed on the FBI’s Most-Wanted Terrorists list, becoming the first woman added to the list and only the second domestic terrorist. Joanne Chesimard, now known as Assata Shakur, was convicted … Читать далее
Karen: The Scandal over our new product line really damaged our Image, and we need To rebuild consumer trust. Brandon: This is going to be an Uphill battle. Losing customers is easy. Winning them back will be really hard. Karen: I agree, but our stock is Taking a beating and we need to do something … Читать далее
Shannon: It looks like you’re ready for your trip. You must be Psyched. Ignacio: Yeah, I am. I’m almost ready. I’ve gone to the post office and filled out a form so they’ll Hold my mail while I’m gone. Shannon: I could pick up your mail for you. Ignacio: Thanks, but it’ll just be easier … Читать далее
The Klondike King paused meditatively, and the group on the hotel porch hitched their chairs up closer. «Talkin’ of bear,» he went on, «now up in the Northern Country there are various kinds. On the Little Pelly, for instance, they come down that thick in the summer to feed on the salmon that you can’t … Читать далее
My friend Jim and I decided to see the latest Blockbuster this weekend. I like a good Action movie once in a while. We decided to meet at the movie theater After work. When I got the theater, I looked around and didn’t see Jim. So, I thought I would get in line to buy … Читать далее
One of my favorite Hang-outs is a cafe near where I live called Bolivar in Santa Monica. It’s only five minutes Away, and its never too busy to find a table. Sometimes it can be Bustling, but that’s usually just in the morning during Rush hour or at Lunchtime. The owners are from Venezuela, and … Читать далее
Therese: I can’t believe you told Mom and Dad about me driving the car last Saturday when I wasn’t Supposed to. I thought we had a Deal. You wouldn’t Tell on me and I’d take you and Kathy to the movies this weekend. You’re such a Tattletale. Stephen: I Swear it wasn’t me! Why would … Читать далее
I was at the store, and when the clerk finished Ringing me up, I had a few problems. Clerk: Your total comes to $79.42. Peter: Do you take Credit cards? Clerk: Yes, we take Visa, MasterCard, and American Express. Peter: Here’s my Visa. Clerk: Hmm…I’m sorry but your card has been Declined. Peter: Oh, I … Читать далее
Hotel clerk: Here’s the Bill for your four-night stay. Would you like the Incidentals charged to your credit card? May: Incidentals? I think there’s some mistake. I didn’t order any Pay-per-view movies and I never ordered room service. And, I didn’t have any Spa services, either. Hotel clerk: Are you sure? We show three movies … Читать далее
The wish of persons in the humbler classes of life, to ape the manners and customs of those whom fortune has placed above them, is often the subject of remark, and not unfrequently of complaint. The inclination may, and no doubt does, exist to a great extent, among the small gentility-the would-be aristocrats-of the middle … Читать далее
Charlotte: What are you doing in here? The entire Wedding party is looking for you. Chris: Yeah, I know. Charlotte: Well, what’s the matter? You’re not getting Cold feet, are you? Chris: That’s just it. I’m really having Doubts about getting married. What am I doing here? I think I’m about to make the biggest … Читать далее
Alex: Good morning. What’s with the Gloom and doom? Paige: Have you seen this morning’s newspaper? Alex: No, I haven’t. Paige: You’d better read this. It’s an article about our company. Alex: Let me see that. This is Outrageous! How can anybody print such lies? We’re not On the verge of going under. How did … Читать далее
Apartment Manager: This is the one-bedroom apartment we have for rent. Let me show you around. Sherin: Wait! Did you see that? It looked like a Mouse or a Rat. Apartment Manager: There aren’t any Rodents or any other Vermin in this Apartment complex. I make sure of that. Sherin: Are you sure? Apartment Manager: … Читать далее
«Listen to me,» said the Demon as he placed his hand upon my head. «The region of which I speak is a dreary region in Libya, by the borders of the river Zaire. And there is no quiet there, nor silence. The waters of the river have a saffron and sickly hue; and they flow … Читать далее
Rosalba: Can you believe these Prices? I know we’re in a Recession, but the cost of everyday Necessities shouldn’t Skyrocket overnight. William: I think it has something to do with the Shortage of Produce. I don’t know why I’m surprised that stores like this one try To gouge customers At the drop of a hat. … Читать далее
Brittany: [Slurring her speech] I had a really nice time. Tri: I’m glad to hear it. It was nice of Marie To set us up. Brittany: Yeah, she told me that you would be my Soul mate, and she was right! You’re Dreamy… Tri: Uh…well, thanks. It was really nice meeting you, but I’d better … Читать далее
Eileen: What are you doing with all that Band equipment? Dex: The guys in the band are planning a Reunion. It’s time for our Comeback. It will be the Stuff of legends! Eileen: Aren’t you afraid of being called Has-beens after all these years? Dex: Bite your tongue. There is a Groundswell of support for … Читать далее
Grayson removed the irons from the other’s wrists and legs. «Hart!» he said sharply. The young man on the cot did not stir. Grayson hesitated and then deliberately kicked the man. «Damn you, Hart, listen to me! I’m releasing you-just in case I don’t come back» John Hart neither opened his eyes nor showed any … Читать далее
Pablo: Okay everybody, have a seat. The purpose of this meeting is to get everybody On the same page. I’m Passing out the Fact sheet we’ve prepared. This fact sheet gives a Rundown on what has happened To date so that no one is In the dark about our current situation. We’ve also prepared these … Читать далее
Jolene: I’m Sweating like a pig. When is this Heat wave going to end? Eric: I’ve no idea, but I’m Not moving a muscle until it does. Hand me that Pitcher of iced tea, would you? Jolene: Get it yourself. I’m not moving until it Drops below 80 Degrees. Eric: It’s not the Temperature. It’s … Читать далее
Toshi: You can’t go outside looking like that! What are you thinking? Celeste: I’m Exercising my Right of free speech. I’ve put on these clothes and painted my body this way to protest the treatment of women. I want to send a message. Toshi: You’re crazy if you think people are going To take you … Читать далее
To Whom It May Concern: I am writing Regarding a tour that my wife and I took with your company on February 26, 2006. The Brochure Stated that we Would see some of the most interesting Sights of the city. Since we had visited the city before, we looked forward to seeing some new Attractions. … Читать далее
Suzanne: Don’t take that! I’m reading an article in the newspaper about all of the Drugs and Medical devices that have been Recalled in the past year and you wouldn’t believe how long this list is. Abdul: I’m just taking something for my headache. I’m sure this Medicine is fine. Suzanne: Don’t be so sure. … Читать далее
Rise of the machines: Spare a thought for the only Rectal Teaching Assistant in the UK who has lost his livelihood to a cold, metal bastard. A bionic booty comprising prosthetic buttocks and anus with in-built robotic tech was developed by the white coats at Imperial College London to help doctors and nurses practise probing … Читать далее
Caroline: I just got an email from Sandra with her new Address. I wish I knew what kind of neighborhood our daughter is living in. Bryce: Let’s find out. I’ll Type in her address on this Map program. Caroline: That will just tell us where she’s living within the city, not what kind of neighborhood … Читать далее
In the consideration of the faculties and impulses — of the prima mobilia of the human soul, the phrenologists have failed to make room for a propensity which, although obviously existing as a radical, primitive, irreducible sentiment, has been equally overlooked by all the moralists who have preceded them. In the pure arrogance of the … Читать далее
I was happy to finally get a job, but I wasn’t ready for a first day of work like this one. … Boss: This is your first day and my job is To give you the rundown on how we do things around here. This is a Well-oiled machine. Everybody has To pull his or … Читать далее
There were once a man and a woman who had long, in vain, wished for a child. At length it appeared that God was about to grant their desire. These people had a little window at the back of their house from which a splendid garden could be seen, which was full of the most … Читать далее
Edmundo: What are you doing? Ruth: Oh, I’m Packing. My Lease is up at the end of the month and I’m moving to Vancouver for six months while my boyfriend is finishing his degree at the university. Edmundo: Oh, wow, are you moving yourself or are you using a Moving company? Ruth: I’m renting a … Читать далее
Joan: Hi, how are you? What are you doing? What is this? Roberto: Whoa! You’re very High-strung this morning. Joan: Am I? I am a little Wired. I’ve been Up all night trying to finish an assignment for one of my classes. Roberto: You don’t seem tired at all for having been up all night. … Читать далее
Jeff: What were you and Richard talking about earlier? It looked Intense. Lucy: Yeah, Richard said something to me that I Didn’t Appreciate. Jeff: Oh, no. I know how Insensitive he can be. What has he done now? Lucy: He asked me how long it took me to learn English. Jeff: But, you were born … Читать далее
He’s the man who flew too much. Steve Rothstein bought a golden ticket from American Airlines in 1987 — granting him a lifetime of unlimited travel. He clocked more than 10 million miles and 10,000 flights. He used his power to fly hopeless strangers home, a friend to the Louvre, and a priest to Rome … Читать далее
Alisha: Hey, you’re back from your vacation. Where did you go? New York City? Miami? Ramon: I decided to spend my vacation in Maddieville. Alisha: Where is Maddieville? I’ve never heard of it. Ramon: It’s a small town about a six-hour drive from here. I read about it being a Throwback to the days of … Читать далее
Justine: So that’s the plan. We drive to San Francisco, then to Portland, then to Seattle, and then to Vancouver. Howie: What? Why are we driving to Vancouver instead of flying? Justine: Haven’t you noticed all of the Fees the airlines are Tacking on these days? First, there were the fuel Surcharges and now, there … Читать далее
Josephine: Hello. Ray: Hi, Josephine, it’s Ray. We have a meeting today at 10 a. m. and I was wondering if you would mind if I brought my kids with me. Their babysitter didn’t show up. Josephine: Oh, sure. That’s no problem. Your children are so Well-behaved. Even at their age, they have Impeccable manners. … Читать далее
Dear Dr. Lee: I don’t know if you’ll remember me, but I introduced myself to you after your Keynote at last week’s Conference. As I mentioned to you, I have read all of your journal papers and I am a great admirer of your Research. Your article in the Top journal Language Learning was groundbreaking. … Читать далее
Mohsen: I need to get off this Island. I’m getting Island fever. Ella: We’ve only been here two days. Give it a chance. We’re here to enjoy a slower Pace of life, remember? Mohsen: When you said we were going on an island vacation, I didn’t know we’d be so Isolated. There isn’t a Living … Читать далее