You might be a redneck if 08

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1. Redneck wins lottery A Redneck buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Austin to claim it where the man verifies his ticket number. The Redneck says “I want my $20 million.” To which the man replied, “No, sir. It doesn’t work that way. We give you a million today, and then you’ll get the rest […]...
2. You might be a redneck if 10 You might be a redneck if… You’ve ever shot a deer from inside your house. The first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are “Howdy!”, “HEY!” or “How Y’all Doin’?” (If they respond with the same… they’re a redneck too!) You have more than two brothers named Bubba or Junior. You’ve […]...
3. You might be a redneck if 04 You might be a redneck if… The taillight covers of your car are made of tape. Your car has never had a full tank of gas. Any of your kids were conceived in a car wash. Your momma has ever been involved in a cuss fight with the principal. You think a subdivision is part […]...
4. You might be a redneck if 06 You might be a redneck if… Your soap on a rope doubles as an air freshener. Your wife’s hairdo attracts bees. Your baby’s first words are “Attention K-Mart shoppers.” The antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes. Your primary source of income is the pawn shop. You pick your teeth from […]...
5. This redneck gets married, but on his wedding night This redneck gets married, but on his wedding night he doesn’t know what to do. He’s fumbling around for a while, but finally his wife gets fed up and says, “Jeb, ya big idiot! Yer s’pposed to take that thing you play with and put it where I pee!” …So he got his bowling bowl […]...
6. You might be a redneck if 02 You might be a redneck if… Your Christmas tree is still up in February. You’ve ever been arrested for loitering. You think that potted meat on a saltine is an hors d’ouvre. There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house. You hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it […]...
7. You might be a redneck if 01 You might be a redneck if… More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general. You think the stock market has a fence around it. You think the O. J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test. You’ve ever lost a loved one to kudzu. Your boat has not […]...
8. You might be a redneck if 09 You might be a redneck if… Your wife’s job requires her to wear an orange vest. You’ve ever worn a tube top to a wedding. Bikers back down from your momma. You were shooting pool when your kids were born. Your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet. You think that Dom Perignon […]...
9. You might be a redneck if 05 You might be a redneck if… You’ve ever been involved in a custody fight over a huntin’ dog. You’re an expert on worm beds. The dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house. Your wife has ever said, “Come move this transmission so I can take a bath!” Your family tree […]...
10. You might be a redneck if 07 You might be a redneck if… You’ve ever barbecued Spam on the grill. You own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap. The best way to keep things cold is to leave’em in the shade. You’ve ever raked leaves in your kitchen. The neighbors started a petition over your Christmas lights. […]...
11. You might be a redneck if 03 You might be a redneck if… There are more than five McDonald’s bags currently on the floorboard of your car. Momma taught you how to flip a cigarette. There is a wasp nest in your living room. The Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice. You give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his […]...
12. Перевод слова beard Beard – борода Перевод слова Red beard – рыжая борода thick beard – густая борода designer beard – модная небритость He stroked his long Beard. Он поглаживал свою длинную бороду. He had a long, white Beard. У него была длинная белая борода. His Beard was white with eld. В старости седина убелила его бороду....
13. A talking bird One man wanted to make a special gift for his mother on the Mother’s day. He run out of ideas but then found a pet shop where was birds that could sing, talk and dance. The price was 5 thousand dollars, but he bought two of them and send to his mother as a surprise. […]...
14. Next US President A redneck calles up the White House and tells the receptionist: “I’d like to become the next President of the United States.” The receptionist: “What are you, an idiot?” Redneck: “Why, is it required?”...
15. Sexually active A REDNECK BRINGS HIS DAUGHTER TO THE GYNOCOLOGIST FOR BIRTH CONTROL PILLS. THE DR. ASKS,”IS YOUR DAUGHTER SEXUALLY ACTIVE?” THE REDNECK SAYS,”NAW, SHE JUST LAYS THERE LIKE HER MOTHER. Sent by BOBBY...
16. Перевод слова display Display – показ, выставка; демонстрировать, проявлять Перевод слова Military display, display of troops – военный парад fashion display – демонстрация мод to display the national flag – вывесить национальный флаг to display dedication – выказывать преданность He liked to Display his erudition. Он любил похвастаться своей эрудицией. Toys were Displayed in the store window. Игрушки […]...
17. Finding the Perfect Gift Fae: Help! I still need to buy a Gift for my mother and I can’t seem to think of the perfect Present, something that’ll really Knock her socks off. Pablo: Why don’t you just get her a Gift certificate or a Gift card? That way, she can Pick out her own gift. Fae: Oh, she […]...
18. Finding the Perfect Gift Fae: Help! I still need to buy a Gift for my mother and I can’t seem to think of the perfect Present, something that’ll really Knock her socks off. Pablo: Why don’t you just get her a Gift certificate or a Gift card? That way, she can Pick out her own gift. Fae: Oh, she […]...
19. Перевод слова gift Gift – подарок, дар Перевод слова At this price it’s a gift! – за такую цену это просто подарок generous gift – щедрый подарок graduation gift – подарок к окончанию учебного заведения The family made a Gift of his paintings to the museum. Семья отдала его картины в дар музею. She has the rare Gift […]...
20. Значение идиомы leave hanging [leave hanging] or [leave hanging in the air] {v. phr.} To leaveundecided or unsettled. Because the committee could not decide on atime and place, the matter of the spring dance was left hanging. Ted’s mother didn’t know what to do about the broken window, so hispunishment was left hanging in the air until his father […]...
21. Значение идиомы buy off [buy off] {v.} To turn from duty or purpose by a gift. When the police threatened to stop the gambling business, the owner bought them off. The Indians were going to burn the cabins, but the men bought them off with gifts. Compare: PAY OFF....
22. Значение идиомы gift of gab [gift of gab] or [gift of the gab] {n. phr.}, {informal} Skill intalking; ability to make interesting talk that makes people believeyou. Many men get elected because of their gift of gab. Mr. Taylor’s gift of gab helped him get a good job....
23. Значение идиомы carrying charge [carrying charge] {n.} An extra cost added to the price of something bought on weekly or monthly payments. The price of the bicycle was $50. Jim bought it for $5.00 a month for ten months plus a carrying charge of $1 a month....
24. Texan with a new car Three cowboys were hanging out in the bunkhouse. “I know that smart aleck Tex,” said the first. “He’s going to start bragging about that new foreign car he bought as soon as he gets back.” “Not Tex,” the second cowboy replied. “He’ll always be just a good ol’ boy. When he walks in, I’m sure […]...
25. Military traditions Top Holiday Traditions In The Military 9. Gluing Santa beard to your gas mask 8. Roasting chestnuts with an M4-A3 flamethrower 7. Draw up list of who’s naughty, who’s nice and who can’t run their 2 miles without wheezing like an infant 6. Christmas morning, getting to sleep in till 0530 5. You open a […]...
26. Значение идиомы five o’clock shadow [five o’clock shadow] {n. phr.} A very short growth of beard on aman’s face who did shave in the morning but whose beard is so strongthat it is again visible in the afternoon. “You have a five o’clockshadow, honey,” Irene said, “and we’re going to the opera. Why don’tyou shave again quickly?”...
27. Значение идиомы for the birds [for the birds] {adj. phr.}, {slang} Not interesting; dull; silly;foolish; stupid. I think history is for the birds. I saw thatmovie. It’s for the birds....
28. A man walked into a gift shop that sold religious items A man walked into a gift shop that sold religious items. Near the cash register he saw a display of caps with “WWJD” printed on all of them. He was puzzled over what the letters could mean, but couldn’t figure it out, so he asked the clerk. The clerk replied that the letters stood for […]...
29. Abe Lincoln An older man wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phoney beard sat down at a bar and ordered a drink. As the bartender set it down, he asked, “Going to a party?” “Yeah,” the man answered, “I’m supposed to come dressed as my love life.” “But you look like Abe Lincoln,” protested the […]...
30. Перевод слова month Month – месяц Перевод слова Against the end of the month – к концу месяца the inside of a month – середина месяца inside of a month – в пределах месяца last month – в прошлом месяце He’ll be here for a Month. Он пробудет здесь месяц. He was gone for a Month. Он исчез […]...
31. Значение идиомы look a gift horse in the mouth [look a gift horse in the mouth] To complain if a gift is notperfect. – A proverb. Usually used with a negative. John gave Joe abaseball but Joe complained that the ball was old. His father told himnot to look a gift horse in the mouth....
32. Santa’s Pet Peeves Department Store Santa Peeves 8. Kids who refuse to believe that’s fruitcake on your breath, not gin 7. When the last guy to use the beard leaves bits of his lunch in it 6. Even with the costume, people recognizing you from “Crime Watch” 5. Parents who get all uptight when you offer their kids […]...
33. Перевод идиомы for the birds, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: for the birds Перевод: бесполезный, негодный, ненужный; скучный, неинтересный Пример: Look, this meeting is for the birds. Let’s leave it at once. Послушай, это сборище совершенно бесполезное. Давай уйдем сразу же. This television programs is for the birds. Эта телевизионная передача скучная....
34. An artist asked the gallery owner An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time. “I have good news and bad news,” the owner replied. “The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told […]...
35. A Trip to the Jewelry Store My wife’s birthday was Coming up And I wanted to get her a special Present. She always tells me to not to Splurge on gifts for her but For once, I decided To pull out all the stops. I went to the Jewelry Store and began looking at all of the Display cases. I started […]...
36. A Trip to the Jewelry Store My wife’s birthday was Coming up And I wanted to get her a special Present. She always tells me to not to Splurge on gifts for her but For once, I decided To pull out all the stops. I went to the Jewelry Store and began looking at all of the Display cases. I started […]...
37. Are You a Bird Brain? You May Wish You Were! On those days when you start to feel that your coursework is taxing your brain, take a moment to think about Alex, an African grey parrot, who was the subject of a thirty-year (1977-2007) experiment by an animal psychologist named Irene Pepperberg, initially at the University of Arizona and later at Harvard and Brandeis University. […]...
38. 12 days of Christmas December 14, 1998 Dearest Dave, I went to the door today, and the postman delivered a partridge in a pear tree. This was a delightful gift! I couldn’t have been more surprised or pleased darling! With truly the deepest love, Agnes December 15, 1998 Dearest Dave, Today the postman brought me yet another of your […]...
39. Books Топик Книги рассказывает, насколько важно чтение книг. Люди читают не только для развлечения, при чтении книг мышление человека задействовано полностью, если мы, например, сопереживаем героям и их жизнь вызывает много чувств и эмоций. Чтение книг полностью захватывает внимание и развивает наш кругозор. Contemporary life is impossible without reading. The influence of literature on people’s mind […]...
40. Irish Pub Jokes Murphy won the Irish Sweepstakes $100,000.00 and was on a long holiday in America. He went on a bus tour and traveled for hours and hours through desert country and oil fields. Murphy said, “Where are we now?” The guide said, “We’re in the great state of Texas.” “It’s a big place,” said Murphy. The […]...