Melissa: You’re looking at the next Overnight sensation. I’m Uploading my video right now, and by this time tomorrow, I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s had over 100,000 Views. It’s going To go viral. Frank: You and your Amateur videos. Who is going to watch something with such low Production value? Melissa: You’d be surprised. … Читать далее
Hamid: I just finished a really good book. I thought the characters were Headed toward a Tragic ending, but there was a Twist near the end, and everything turned out well. It was so Satisfying! Rachel: It sounds Sappy to me. Hamid: It wasn’t sappy at all. It was just a happy ending. I know … Читать далее
Edward: Would you dance with me? Bella: Me? I’d like to, but I don’t dance. Edward: Why? Bella: I Have two left feet. I’m so Clumsy, first I’d step all over your feet, and then I’d Stumble all over the dance floor. Edward: I don’t believe that. I bet you’re very Graceful on the dance … Читать далее
Orlando: Hand me that Worcestershire sauce. Janine: Here. You’re not putting that on your Burger, are you? Orlando: No, I’m using it for my Hot dog. Janine: Wait. You’ve put Ketchup, Mustard, Mayonnaise, and Barbecue sauce on your burger, and now you’re going to put Worcestershire sauce on your hot dog? Orlando: Sure, you’ve got … Читать далее
Robert: These designs are really Futuristic-looking. Mara: I’m trying to be Forward-thinking and imagine what the world will be like in 50 to 100 years. Robert: You think that the world will be filled with Space-age gadgets like these? Mara: That’s the natural Evolution of Technology for the next 100 years, I think. We will … Читать далее
I reverently believe that the Maker who made us all makes everything in New England but the weather. I don’t know who makes that, but I think it must be raw apprentices in the weather-clerk’s factory who experiment and learn how, in New England, for board and clothes, and then are promoted to make weather … Читать далее
Alan: Did you see today’s news? There’s been an Outbreak of Podcaster’s Disease in the city. Katja: Oh, my God, not Podcaster’s Disease! I would not want To come down with that. Alan: The first outbreak was at the local high school, and the Health authorities thought it was localized. But a second, more Widespread, … Читать далее
Christine: What is this Sticker on your Driver’s license? Saul: This sticker? It Indicates that I’ve signed up for the Organ donation program. If anything bad happens to me, I want my organs to go to Recipients who need them. Christine: You mean you want somebody else to have your Heart, Liver… Saul: …eyes, Kidneys, … Читать далее
I really Blew it last night. I finally asked my neighbor, Fatima, out on a date and she Walked out on me in the middle of it. I didn’t blame her. I wanted To make a good impression on her, but I felt I was Floundering a half an hour into the date. I decided … Читать далее
Aceh tsunami survivor Martunis joins Portuguese club Sporting Lisbon On Wednesday, a seventeen-year-old boy named Martunis from Banda Aceh, Indonesia, was announced as the newest addition to Sporting Portugal’s U-19 football team. He will wear the green-and-white hoops and train at the very same academy where his idol, three-time FIFA World Player of the Year … Читать далее
Tanya: We’ve been here for three days and I’m still getting lost. Darren: Here’s a map. These are the Residential neighborhoods. See? This is where we’re staying. Tanya: I know, I know. But where were we today? The tour bus went down so many Alleys that I Lost my bearings after 10 minutes. I thought … Читать далее
I got my first Part-time job when I was 15 working at a Car wash in the Summertime. A friend of mine, Rob, worked there and got me the job. I think it paid $2.90 an hour, which I considered a Fortune. There were no Allowances in my family, so most of my brothers and … Читать далее
Sandra: I don’t know what to do. Our Contractor installed the wrong equipment and now we’re having major problems. I’ve tried contacting her, but she’s Dodging my calls. The trouble is I’ve already Paid her in full. Antonin: Well, that’s a Breach of contract. Your only Recourse might be To take her to court. Sandra: … Читать далее
Hugo: Wow, when you said that you did some Woodworking on the weekends, I thought you meant Refinishing furniture. But this! This is a real Workshop and you’re actually building furniture. Shawna: Yeah, this is what I’m working on right now. I’m building a dining table and chairs. Hugo: The Grain is beautiful on this … Читать далее
This narrative begins with the death of its hero. Silas Deemer died on the 16th day of July, 1863, and two days later his remains were buried. As he had been personally known to every man, woman and well-grown child in the village, the funeral, as the local newspaper phrased it, «was largely attended.» In … Читать далее
The last time I went to the doctor for a Checkup, she told me that I needed to start taking some Dietary supplements that had the Vitamins and Minerals that my body needed to stay healthy. I told her that I ate a Balanced diet, but she said that many people who generally ate well … Читать далее
The 1883 eruption on Krakatoa may be the loudest noise the Earth has ever made. On August 27, 1883, the Earth let out a noise louder than any it has made since. It was 10:02 a. m. local time when the sound emerged from the island of Krakatoa, which sits between Java and Sumatra in … Читать далее
I Came across some good advice while reading this week. If you’re like me, you spend most of your time thinking about all of the things that are on your «to-do‚» list and you try to figure out how you’re going to do them all. Or, sometimes, I think about things that have already happened. … Читать далее
Suzanna: Remind me why we’re staying in this Fleabag motel in the Seedy part of town? Kenji: We agreed that we would Skimp on the Accommodations so we could spend more money on activities and eating out. Remember? Suzanna: I remember, but I Didn’t bargain for someplace as Run-down as this. Look at the Peeling … Читать далее
The Flea, the Grasshopper, and the Skipjack once wanted to see which of them could jump highest; and they invited the whole world, and whoever else would come, to see the grand sight. And there the three famous jumpers were met together in the room. «Yes, I’ll give my daughter to him who jumps highest,» … Читать далее
Luc: You’ll never guess who called and left a Voicemail message today. Angela: Who? Luc: Barbara! Angela: Oh, really? What did she want? Luc: She said she was calling to RSVP for our party this Saturday. Angela: Did she? Luc: Stop Playing innocent with me. Did you or did you not invite her to our … Читать далее
Sylvia: How would you like to take my sister, Donna, to the movies this weekend? You’d be doing me a Favor. Joon: Why? What’s wrong with her? Sylvia: Nothing is wrong with her! She just broke up with her boyfriend of four years and she’s Down in the dumps. She’s Shy, so I thought I’d … Читать далее
Jan: We’re almost done. We just need to get some bathroom Supplies for Kimberly. Tim: Okay, here are some Towels, a Bathmat and a Bathroom scale. Don’t forget the cleaning supplies. She’ll need some Rubber gloves, Disinfectant, Bowl cleaner, and a Plunger. Jan: All right. We have all that. Where are you going? Tim: She’ll … Читать далее
Mr. Mann: Why are all these people Milling around doing no work? Laura! You’re In charge when I’m out of the office and you’re Incompetent! Laura: Mr. Mann, we need to talk in private. Let’s go into your office. Mr. Mann: What is this about? Laura: Mr. Mann, I’ve tried to do my job the … Читать далее
Hitomi: What are you Unboxing? Jason: This is my new Smartphone. It has Every feature under the sun! Hitomi: Every feature? Jason: It has a high quality Camera and Video camera, and it’s a Videophone. It has a great GPS program, too. The Touch-screen and the Keyboard are easy to use and everything is so … Читать далее
Yasmine and I were going to a show at the Staples Center and Yasmine was driving. My friends Warned me about her driving, but they didn’t prepare me for this Ride. Pedro: Whoa, slow down! You almost Rear-ended that SUV. Yasmine: No I didn’t. Take it easy. I Have everything under control. I’m not even … Читать далее
Night had fallen on that great and beautiful city known as Bagdad — on-the-Subway. And with the night came the enchanted glamour that belongs not to Arabia alone. In different masquerade the streets, bazaars and walled houses of the occidental city of romance were filled with the same kind of folk that so much interested … Читать далее
Lillian: Look at this! I’m going to take this home as a souvenir. Bruce: You can’t do that. That might be an Artifact of some kind. It belongs to this Archaeological site. Lillian: It’s just a rock. No one will miss it. Bruce: That’s not the point. Everything here should be Preserved. That’s the point … Читать далее
Eric: Who were you talking to on the phone? Melissa: My mother. I was Commiserating with her about Dad’s Retirement. Eric: Your father retired two months ago. That was a good thing, right? Melissa: Well, it’s good that he doesn’t have to work anymore, but he’s Driving my mother up the wall. He Putters around … Читать далее
The donkey was first associated with the Democratic Party during the 1828 presidential election when opponents of Democratic candidate Andrew Jackson referred to him as a «jackass.» Before getting into the answer to this question, we should first address an terminology issue — the difference between the «Democrat Party» and the «Democratic Party.» The proper … Читать далее
Reservation agent: Hello, Milton Hotel Reservations. How may I assist you? Sally: Hi, I’m calling to make some changes to an Existing reservation. Reservation agent: Certainly. Do you have the Reservation number? Sally: Sure, it’s 234678. Reservation agent: That’s a reservation for Sally Menkel. Is that right? Sally: Yes, that’s right. I’d like to change … Читать далее
Lisa: This is it. I’m Quitting smoking for good. Michael: Good for you. Are you going Cold turkey? Lisa: No, I tried that, but it didn’t work. I Craved cigarettes too much. Michael: How about Nicotine gum? Have you tried that? Lisa: Yes, but I didn’t like the Side effects. It Irritated my Throat. Michael: … Читать далее
Ali: It’s just our luck that as soon as we arrive here for our Island vacation, there’s a Hurricane warning! Mariela: It’s Uncanny, isn’t it? On last year’s vacation, we Crossed paths with a Tornado and now this. Ali: Yeah, that tornado was something. I had experienced Windstorms before with really strong Gusts of wind, … Читать далее
Norma: What is this? Jimmy: It’s a Flyer for a meeting I’ve called to talk about forming a Labor union here. Norma: Here? Do you think the Management will let us? Jimmy: They can’t stop us. We’re working longer and longer hours and we need To demand higher pay. We also need better Work conditions … Читать далее
It’s a discovery no woman wants to hear — the average single male changes his sheets just four times a year. While they strip their beds every 3.1 months on average, unattached women change their linen every two-and-a-half weeks — or 26 times a year — a survey found. The grubbiest group for keeping sheets … Читать далее
Los Angeles, California (CNN) — Rick Norsigian kept two boxes he bought at a garage sale under his pool table for four years before realizing they may be too valuable to store at home. The Fresno, California, commercial painter learned this week that what was in those boxes he paid $45 dollars for a decade … Читать далее
Carson: What happened here?! Samantha: As you can see, there was an accident. Early this morning, a man driving along this street Lost control of his car and ran into the front window of our store. Luckily, no one was hurt. Carson: What are we going to do? We can’t open for business with this … Читать далее
Brianna: Are you still here? I thought you left ages ago. Viktor: There’s no rush. I’m thinking of Postponing until tomorrow. Brianna: Why? Viktor: I feel a sense of Foreboding. I have a Sneaking suspicion that things aren’t going to go well. Brianna: Under the circumstances, I can understand your Reluctance, but it’s like Ripping … Читать далее
Irene: How is your team doing in the Standings? Kent: They’re Seeded sixth and they’re In a bracket with one of the best teams in the Tournament. Our team has already lost to them. Irene: I thought it was a Double-elimination tournament. Kent: It is. That’s the only reason they’re not Out of contention for … Читать далее
Rosalind: How is the Pilot program coming along? Jimmy: We’ll be ready To launch it in another month, but I have some serious Reservations. Rosalind: Like what? Jimmy: We haven’t Worked out all of the bugs yet and we might Come up against some Resistance from the community. Rosalind: Isn’t that the Nature of a … Читать далее
Marcus: All right, let’s get started. These documents won’t Sort themselves. Rebecca: I really don’t think sorting through documents is the best use of my time. Can’t the company find an Intern to do this? Marcus: We have Confidential information in these files and unless we want a Security breach, only people who are Authorized … Читать далее
A hitchhiking feline in Florida has a 50-year-old truck owner to thank for her unusual rescue. Errand Frazier of Vero Beach wasn’t quite sure what to do at first when he heard purring coming from his Chevy pickup, parked outside his house in late May. He couldn’t see anything and wasn’t sure exactly where it … Читать далее
Slid, if these be your «passados» and «montantes,» I’ll have none o’ them. Ned Knowles. The Baron Ritzner von Jung was a noble Hungarian family, every member of which was more or less remarkable for talent of some description — the majority for that species of grotesquerie in conception of which Tieck, a scion of … Читать далее
Tammy: What are you doing this year to give your team an Advantage? Phillip: I Have a few tricks up my sleeve. We’re going to have a Winning season. Tammy: Are you going To start Wang? Phillip: No, I’m Redshirting Wang. I want him to sit out his first year so he can Sharpen his … Читать далее
As I was driving home from work, my car started Acting up. It was making a strange noise and the engine was Running roughly. When I got home, I Popped Open the Hood to see if there was anything wrong. After looking around for a few minutes and not seeing anything, I decided to take … Читать далее
David: Why has Joyce been Moping around all week? What’s wrong with her? Victoria: She’s Suffering from a broken heart. Her boyfriend Broke up with her over the weekend. They had been together for two years. David: Did she tell you the Gruesome details? Victoria: Not really. She just said that she’s feeling Depressed and … Читать далее
Marcel: What is this on your wall? Fiona: It’s my Tribute to Del Gordon, my favorite player. Marcel: This isn’t a tribute. It’s a Shrine! Fiona: It’s not a shrine. I just have a few pictures of him taped on my wall. Marcel: You have Poster-size pictures of him covering three walls of your room. … Читать далее
Carl: I’m sorry, say that again. I couldn’t hear you Over that guy at the next table Shouting into his cell phone. Stephanie: That guy is so Rude. We’re trying to have a Leisurely conversation over a cup of coffee, and we have To out shout some Inconsiderate jerk. Carl: Do you think he realizes … Читать далее
Camille: No, you can’t have a new bike if you get an “A” on the test. You should study because you want to do well in school. We’ll talk about it when I get home tonight. Kids! Aaron: What’s the matter? Camille: My kids won’t do anything without an Incentive. I know it’s my own … Читать далее
The picturesque mountainous region of South Sulawesi, in Indonesia, is home to an ethnic group called the Toraja. A large number of its members live in the regency of Tana Toraja or «the Land of Toraja» at the center of the island of Sulawesi, 300 km north of Makassar, the provincial capital of South Sulawesi. … Читать далее