Jokes
President Carter’s joke
In an interview with David Letterman, Carter passed along an anecdote of a translation problem in Japan. Carter was speaking at a business lunch in Tokyo, where he decided to open his speech with
How all careers end
How careers end… Lawyers are disbarred. Ministers are defrocked. Electricians are delighted. Far Eastern diplomats are disoriented. Drunks are distilled. Alpine climbers are dismounted. Piano tuners are unstrung. Orchestra leaders are disbanded. Artists’ models
You can come out now
Jon was looking for a little “action”. He picked up a sweet young thang at the bar and took her back to his hotel room. Little did he know she was damn near a
A man takes his 10 year old daughter to the doctor
A man takes his 10 year old daughter to the doctor. He says “Doctor, I want to put her on the pill.” The Doctor says “Why?!? Is she sexually active?” The guy says “Nah,
Speaking of spelling, here is a news bulletin
Speaking of spelling, here’s a news bulletin…….. The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility. As
And I will do anything for love
The beautiful secretary of the president of a bank goes on a sight-seeing tour with a very rich African king who was a very important client. The client out of the blue asks her
Earth science answers
REAL ANSWERS FROM EARTH SCIENCE EXAMS The terrestrial planets are much larger than the gas giants. Wegener found matching bedbugs on opposite sides of the Atlantic. The main problem associated with limestone aquifers is
The other day my house caught fire
The other day my house caught fire. The insurance agent said, “Shouldn’t be a problem. What kind of coverage do you have?” I said, “Fire and theft.” Insurance agent frowned. “Uh oh. Wrong kind.
Why Jim Smith Lost His First Love
Jim Smith wished to buy a present for his first sweetheart, and after careful consideration he decided on a pair of gloves. Accompanied by his sweetheart’s sister, he went to a department store and
A black guy walks into a tavern with a parrot
A black guy walks into a tavern with a parrot on his shoulder…the bartender looks up and says ” where the hell did you get that thing? The Parrot replies ” Over in Africa,