Santa’s Pet Peeves

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1. Santas DiversionSantas Diversion Santa was delivering gifts as usual, when at one house a beautiful young woman was awaiting his arrival. She begged him to stay and cuddle with her on the couch. Santa declined, saying «Ho-ho, gotta go. Gotta deliver these presents, you know.» Trying again, the lovely young thing removed her clothing down to ... Читать далее...
2. Santa vs. system adminsThe similarities between Santa and System Admins 1. Santa is bearded, corpulent, and dresses funny. 2. When you ask Santa for something, the odds of receiving what you wanted are infinitesimal. 3. Santa seldom answers your mail. 4. When you ask Santa where he gets all the stuff he’s got, he says, «Elves make it ... Читать далее...
3. Значение идиомы two bits[two bits] {n.}, {slang} Twenty-five cents; a quarter of a dollar. A haircut only cost two bits when Grandfather was young. Compare:FOUR BITS, SIX BITS....
4. Billy Gates writes SantaDear Santa, How are you doing? I hope you’ve had a successful year and have come up with a lot of interesting toys. It’s really neat how you’re able to do that year after year. I guess that’s how you stay number one in the Christmas presents business business. Actually, I admire the way you ... Читать далее...
5. Перевод слова beardBeard — борода Перевод слова Red beard — рыжая борода thick beard — густая борода designer beard — модная небритость He stroked his long Beard. Он поглаживал свою длинную бороду. He had a long, white Beard. У него была длинная белая борода. His Beard was white with eld. В старости седина убелила его бороду....
6. Перевод слова departmentDepartment — отдел, отделение, кафедра; магазин Перевод слова Department-store chain — сеть крупных универмагов research department — отдел исследований sociology department — кафедра социологии Cooking is not my Department. Кулинария — это не моя область. Our Department has a staff of seven. Персонал нашей кафедры — семь сотрудников. He was selected to head the Department. ... Читать далее...
7. A Publicity StuntHank: What’s that for? Svetlana: This Costume? I’m planning a Publicity stunt to get our store more business. Hank: You think that Dressing up as a giant banana will get our store more business? Svetlana: We need to get Media coverage for the Grand opening of our store and Attract as much Attention as possible. ... Читать далее...
8. Значение идиомы breath[breath] See: CATCH ONE’S BREATH, DRAW A LONG BREATH or TAKE A LONG BREATH, HOLD ONE’S BREATH, IN THE SAME BREATH, OUT OF BREATH, SAVE ONE’S BREATH, SECOND WIND also SECOND BREATH, TAKE ONE’S BREATH AWAY, UNDER ONE’S BREATH, WASTE ONE’S BREATH....
9. A wish for ChristmasIt is around christmas time and santa is sitting in the middle of the mall in his big holiday setup. He has a line of kids lined up to sit on his lap and tell him what they want for christmas. As the line dwindles down; a little 5 year old boy comes up and ... Читать далее...
10. An Australian ChristmasHere comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus, Sweating his fat away Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus, Water-skis on his sleigh Never have a white Christmas When you in Melbourne live Wearing hot pants on the beach When you your presents give Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus, Sweating his ... Читать далее...
11. Значение идиомы nutty as a fruitcake[nutty as a fruitcake] {adj. phr.}, {slang} Very crazy; entirelymad. He looked all right, as we watched him approach, but when hebegan to talk, we saw that he was as nutty as a fruitcake....
12. A man walks into a pharmacy, buys a condomA man walks into a pharmacy, buys a condom, then walks out of the store laughing hysterically. The pharmacist thinks this is weird, but, hey, there’s no law preventing weird people from buying condoms. Maybe it’s a good thing. The next day, the man comes back to the store, purchases another condom, and once again ... Читать далее...
13. Barbie and G. I. JoeA little girl is in line to see Santa. When it’s her turn, she climbs up on Santa’s lap. Santa asks, «What would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas?» The little girl replies, «I want a Barbie and G. I. Joe.» Santa looks at the little girl for a moment and says, «I ... Читать далее...
14. A man running a little behind schedule arrivesA man running a little behind schedule arrives at a picture theatre, goes in to watch the movie that has already started, and as his eyes adjust to the darkness, he is surprised to see a dog sitting beside its master in the row ahead, intently watching the movie. It even seemed to be enjoying ... Читать далее...
15. SensormaticIs everyone out in net land familiar with Sensormatic? They are the company that make the large plastic clips that set off alarms when you exit a department store. I used to work for a department store and the is what we did. Open up the clip and remove the shiny piece of paper. It ... Читать далее...
16. Значение идиомы six bits[six bits] {n.}, {slang} Seventy-five cents. «Lend me six bitstill Friday, Sam,» said Jim. «I’ve spent all my allowance.» Compare:TWO BITS....
17. Значение идиомы a few[a few] {n.} or {adj.} A small number ; some. The dry weather killed most of Mother’s flowers, but a few are left. In the store, Mary saw many pretty rings and bracelets, and she wanted to buy a few of them. After the party, we thought that no one would help clean up, but ... Читать далее...
18. Перевод слова refuseRefuse — отказывать, отвергать; отбросы, мусор Перевод слова Refuse consumer — машина для уничтожения мусора to collect refuse — вывозить мусор to refuse a gift — отклонить подарок to refuse an office — отказаться от назначения Brakes Refused to act. Тормоза отказали. The Stock Exchange has been described as the cloaca bearing with it all ... Читать далее...
19. A Birthday PartyMy sister called me at the Last minute to help her with my nephew’s birthday party. She was feeling really sick and couldn’t get out of bed. I’d never given a children’s party before, but how hard could it be? Well, I found out. First, I had to go to the Party supply store To ... Читать далее...
20. Going to a Home Improvement StorePaige: I think we can get everything we need To fix up the house in one trip. What do you think? Vern: We can try. It seems like everybody had the same thought when they woke up this morning: Go to the Home improvement store! Paige: Yeah, it’s a little crowded, but I still think ... Читать далее...
21. Going to a Home Improvement StorePaige: I think we can get everything we need To fix up the house in one trip. What do you think? Vern: We can try. It seems like everybody had the same thought when they woke up this morning: Go to the Home improvement store! Paige: Yeah, it’s a little crowded, but I still think ... Читать далее...
22. New FAA inspectionsWith the number of airline disasters lately, the FAA now sends an inspector to the North Pole to check out Santa Claus’s sleigh before allowing him to fly on Christmas eve. The inspector arrives and checks the reindeer and they look good, he checks the harness and it looks okay, he checks the sleigh and ... Читать далее...
23. Перевод слова breathBreath — дыхание Перевод слова Short of breath — страдающий одышкой deep breath — глубокий вдох to bate one’s breath — затаить дыхание Sara took a deep Breath. Сара сделала глубокий вдох. It’s so cold outside that I can see my Breath. На улице так холодно, что я могу видеть собственное дыхание. His Breath quickened. ... Читать далее...
24. Confuse Santa Claus1. Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds. 2. While he’s in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a speeding ticket. 3. Leave him a note, explaining that you’ve gone away for the holidays. Ask ... Читать далее...
25. What thin people doBy Barbara Florio Graham From McCall’s, June, 1983, I read every diet I can get my hands on. I even follow their suggestions. But eventually, inevitably, I always get fat again. Now, at last, I’ve found The Answer. After living for almost 14 years with a man who never gains an ounce no matter what ... Читать далее...
26. On Christmas morning a cop on horsebackOn Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his shiny new bike. The cop says to the kid, «Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?» The kid says, «Yeah.» The cop says, «Well, next year tell Santa to ... Читать далее...
27. The Home Improvement StoreWhen you own a house, there is always something that Needs work. I have been Putting off repainting the Garage and I decided that I would do it this weekend. I went to the Home improvement store early in the morning to get the Supplies I’d need. I walked into the Huge store and began ... Читать далее...
28. The Home Improvement StoreWhen you own a house, there is always something that Needs work. I have been Putting off repainting the Garage and I decided that I would do it this weekend. I went to the Home improvement store early in the morning to get the Supplies I’d need. I walked into the Huge store and began ... Читать далее...
29. Значение идиомы take one’s breath away[take one’s breath away] {v. phr.} To surprise greatly; impressvery much; leave speechless with surprise or wonder or delight;astonish. The sunset is so beautiful it takes our breath away. His refusal was so unexpected it took my breath away. Compare: CATCHONE’S BREATH....
30. Another costumeA guy goes into a costume shop. He says, «I’m going to a costume party, I want to go as Adam.» The girl brings out a fig leaf. He says, «Not big enough.» She brings out a bigger one. He says, «Still not big enough.» She brings out a huge fig leaf. He says, «Still ... Читать далее...
31. Holiday DecoratingNow that the holidays are here, it’s time To decorate the house. Every year, we always Go all out. We buy a Christmas tree and the kids decorate it with Ornaments that we’ve bought and made over the years, and with silver and gold Tinsel. We also hang a Wreath on our front door and ... Читать далее...
32. Backward SantaAs a little girl climbed onto Santa’s lap, Santa asked the usual, «And what would you like for Christmas?» The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped: «Didn’t you get my E-mail?»...
33. Значение идиомы catch one’s breath[catch one’s breath] {v. phr.} 1. To breathe in suddenly with fear or surprise. The beauty of the scene made him catch his breath. Compare: TAKE ONE’S BREATH AWAY. 2a. To rest and get back your normal breathing, as after running. After running to the bus stop, we sat down to catch our breath. 2b. ... Читать далее...
34. It was their first dateIt was their first date, and she’d shown the patience of a saint as he babbled on and on about his hobbies, his pet peeves, his driving techniques, and even the standards he used to choose his barber. Finally, he came up for air and said, «But enough about me. Let’s talk about you.» She ... Читать далее...
35. Military traditionsTop Holiday Traditions In The Military 9. Gluing Santa beard to your gas mask 8. Roasting chestnuts with an M4-A3 flamethrower 7. Draw up list of who’s naughty, who’s nice and who can’t run their 2 miles without wheezing like an infant 6. Christmas morning, getting to sleep in till 0530 5. You open a ... Читать далее...
36. Значение идиомы draw a long breath[draw a long breath] or [take a long breath] {v. phr.} To breathe deeply when getting ready to speak or act. Father asked who broke the window. Jim drew a long breath and admitted that he had done it. The salesman took a long breath and started his talk....
37. Значение идиомы out of breath[out of breath] {adj.} or {adv. phr.} Not breathing easily orregularly; gasping; panting. The fat man was out of breath afterclimbing the stairs. The mile run left Bill out of breath....
38. Short Father ChristmasWhat do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective? Santa Clues! Father Christmas win a saucepan in a competition. Now thats what you call pot luck! What do the reindeer sing to Father Christmas on his birthday? Freeze a jolly good fellow! What do you call a man who claps at Christmas? ... Читать далее...
39. Types of MeetingsSusanna: All right, then. This meeting is over. We’ll meet again next week for a Status update. Juan: Hey, do you have a few minutes to talk about tomorrow’s Teleconference? Susanna: Sorry, I’ve got to run. I’m late for my department’s weekly Brainstorming session. Can it wait? Juan: Sure, how about a Lunch meeting? Susanna: ... Читать далее...
40. Being GiftedWould you want to have a special Talent in something? Maybe as a musician or an athlete? I’m Of two minds about this. Sometimes I watch TV or read about someone who has a special talent. This was true during the Olympics. Some of those athletes I saw were very talented. Whether it was Playing ... Читать далее...