A college professor in an anatomy class asked his students

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1. A college professor is explaining to his class that pleasure A college professor is explaining to his class that pleasure is a mental state, and that many people overlook the things they already have. He says, “A man who has developed a true sense of appreciation can enjoy a good bowel movement as much as having sexual intercourse.” One student stands up and says, “Professor, […]...
2. A college professor’s going to bed with his wife A college professor’s going to bed with his wife. He’s not that tired, so he’s gonna stay awake and read while she goes to sleep. So he’s reading, and every once in a while he reaches over and tickles her on the fun spot… “Kitza kitza…” She says, “Will you stop that! Will you stop […]...
3. Three college students were rapping about who they’d like to be Three college students were rapping about who they’d like to be cast off on a desert with. The first one opted for Cindy Crawford. The next one chose Pamela Anderson. The third man chose Virginia Pipeline. “Never heard of her.” his companions protested. “Who is she?” “Why she’s just the greatest Italian gal of all, […]...
4. Biology Class In a biology class, the professor was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen. A young female (FRESHMAN) raised her hand and asked, “If I understand, you’re saying there is a lot of glucose, as in sugar in male semen?” “That’s correct”, responded the professor, going on to add statistical info. Raising her hand […]...
5. One day in class the teacher One day in class the teacher has sex education. On the black board she draws a penis then asks the class if any of them knows what it is. In the back of the room, Dirty Johnny stands and says “That’s a penis, and my father has two of them”. The teacher looks surprised and […]...
6. Talking to the Professor [A knock on the door.] Jeff: Come in. Julie: Hi, Dr. McQuillan, I’m Julie Taylor. I’m in your 2 o’clock class on Thursdays. Jeff: Hi, Julie. Have a seat. What can I do for you? Julie: I wanted to come see you during your Office hours because I Missed class last week. I had a […]...
7. The dean of women at an exclusive girl’s college The dean of women at an exclusive girl’s college was lecturing her students on sexual morality. “In moments of temptation,” said the speaker to the class, “ask yourself just one question: Is an hour of pleasure worth a lifetime of shame?” A sweet young thing in the back of the room rose to ask: “How […]...
8. At a Texas University, a Professor had been teaching his At a Texas University, a Professor had been teaching his students human reproduction. For an exam, one of the questions was: “Female humans are born with a limited number of eggs, while males, during their lifetime, produce millions upon millions of sperm. Why are so many sperm produced?” One young woman’s answer: “Because they won’t […]...
9. Перевод слова professor Professor – профессор, преподаватель Перевод слова Former University professor – бывший преподаватель университета professor of sociology – преподаватель социологии a promotion to the rank of professor – присвоение звания профессора The new Professor always pontificates. Новый профессор всегда занимался догматическими разглагольствованиями. He looked like a nutty Professor. Он выглядел как полоумный профессор. The Professor flunked […]...
10. Значение идиомы cow college [cow college] {n.}, {slang} 1. An agricultural college; a school where farming is studied. A new, bigger kind of apple is being grown at the cow college. 2. A new or rural college not thought to be as good as older or city colleges. John wanted to go to a big college in New York […]...
11. The Pope took a philosophy professor The Pope took a philosophy professor (an atheist at that) out fishing on a large lake. As they drifted on the still lake, the philosopher accidentally dropped an oar and watched it float away. The pontiff stepped out of the boat, walked across the water to the oar, grabbed it and walked back to the […]...
12. A first-grade teacher was overseeing her students as A first-grade teacher was overseeing her students as they experimented with their desk computers. One boy sat staring at the screen, unsure how to get the computer going. The teacher walked over and read what was on his screen. In her most reassuring voice, she said, “The computer wants to know what your name is,” […]...
13. Fun on first day of class This is for entertainment purposes only. We do not advise that you do any of these things on the first day of class or for that matter, on any day of class. 1. Smoke a pipe and respond to each point the professor makes by waving it and saying, “Quite right, old bean!” 2. Wear […]...
14. Значение идиомы cut a class [cut a class] {v. phr.} To be truant; to deliberately miss a class and do something else instead. “If you keep cutting classes the way you do, you will almost surely flunk this course,” John’s professor said to him....
15. College Dorm On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules: “The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time.” He continued, “Anybody caught breaking this rule the […]...
16. Перевод слова college College – колледж Перевод слова College diploma – диплом об окончании колледжа college graduate – выпускник колледжа the cloistered atmosphere of a small college – замкнутая атмосфера маленького колледжа He studied film in College. Он изучал кино в колледже. I started College last week. Я поступил в колледж на прошлой неделе. We met each other […]...
17. Перевод слова sketch Sketch – эскиз, набросок, зарисовка Перевод слова To draw a sketch – делать зарисовку composite sketch – сложный эскиз biographical sketch – биографический очерк comic sketch – комический скетч He made a Sketch of his house. Он сделал набросок своего дома. I always Sketch with pen and paper. Я всегда делаю наброски на бумаге ручкой. […]...
18. Students suspended for riding horses to school Pranks become more common as the school year wraps up for many students. This 2015 story is going viral after being posted on Reddit this week. Two high school seniors were suspended after they rode horses to school as part of “No Vehicle to School Day.” The decision to not use vehicles to get to […]...
19. Students miss a final Introductory Chemistry was taught at Duke University for many years by professor Bonk. One year, two guys took the class and did pretty well on all the quizzes and mid-terms – so much so that going into the final, they each had a solid A. These two friends were so confident going into the final […]...
20. The evils of marijuana A certain college professor was notorious for getting off the topic of the lecture, and on to his favorite subject: the evils of marijuana. Off he went one day into his inventory of horrors, “Used regularly,” he explained, “pot can cause psychic disorientation, sterility, cancer and castration!” “Now wait a minute, professor,” interrupted a student. […]...
21. At the Russian War College, the general is a guest lecturer At the Russian War College, the general is a guest lecturer and tells the class of officers that the session will focus on potential problems and the resulting strategies. One of the officers in the class begins by asking the first question, “Will we have to fight a World War Three?” “Yes, comrades, looks like […]...
22. Значение идиомы old college try [old college try] {n. phr.} An attempt to win a favor from anotherby mentioning the fact that one had gone to the same college oruniversity as the party from whom the favor is requested. Since heneeded a job, he decided to use the old college try when he contactedJerry, but it didn’t work. Compare: OLD […]...
23. Convince these students An Army recruiter delivered a windy pep talk to encourage a group of college students to join the VOLAR. But the culminating point of his oration was greeted with cat calls, whistles and projection of rotten eggs and an assortment of no less rotten vegetables and fruits. A visitor asked a student: “Why you throw […]...
24. The first engineer calls out to the other The first engineer calls out to the other, “Hey–Nice bike! Where did you get it?” “Well,” replies the other, “I was walking to class the other day when this pretty, young coed rides up on this bike. She jumps off, takes off all of her clothes, and says ‘you can have ANYTHING you want!'” “Good […]...
25. Poor Rabbi! A young Jewish couple had only recently set up housekeeping when an unfortunate incident occurred. Early one morning, the wife, drowsy from bed, went to the toilet for the morning’s relief, and neglected to notice that the seat was up. When she sat, she kept going! She was just the right size and shape so […]...
26. Значение идиомы College Boards [College Boards] {n.} A set of examinations given to test a student’s readiness and ability for college. John got a high score on his College Boards. College Boards test both what a student has learned and his ability to learn....
27. Studly young Romeo and his dimwitted college sidekick Studly young Romeo and his dimwitted college sidekick are perched near the front door of the girls’ dorm. Several plain Janes walk by as the two converse. Then a Sharon Stone look-alike emerges from the dorm and saunters past. Romeo turns, smiles, and – barely audibly – inquires, “Tickle your ass with a feather?” The […]...
28. Колледж/ College На английском языке Перевод на русский язык College Колледж All high school children face the problem of choosing their future profession. Before graduating from school they decide which college or university to enter. To pass entrance exams is a real challenge for young people. It requires hard intellectual work and lots of effort. At college […]...
29. How MIT Students Won $8 Million in the Massachusetts Lottery MIT students figured out how to make winning the Massachusetts lottery a sure thing, and a recent investigation suggests that the lottery commission knew about it. Maybe Uncle Ben was right: With great power comes great responsibility. While most students at the famed Massachusetts Institute of Technology use their powers for good – for example, […]...
30. Значение идиомы third class [third class] {n.} 1. The third best or highest group; the classnext after the second class. Mary won the pie-making contest in thethird class, for the youngest girls. 2. Mail that is printed, otherthan magazines and newspapers that are published regularly, andpackages that are not sealed and weigh less than a pound. Thecompany uses third […]...
31. Значение идиомы first class [first class] {n.} 1. The first rank; the highest class; the bestgroup. The pianist was quite good but he was not in the firstclass. 2. The most expensive or comfortable class of travel; the bestor one of the best groups in which to travel, especially by ship, train, or airplane. Most people can’t afford the […]...
32. Значение идиомы second class [second class] {n.} 1. The second best or highest group; the classnext after the first. Joe was good enough in arithmetic to be putin the second class but was not good enough for the first. Compare:FIRST CLASS. 2. The place or quarters, especially on a ship, train, orairplane which people travel who pay the next […]...
33. Three college roommates – two females and a male Three college roommates – two females and a male – began to argue after dinner about whose turn it was to do the dishes. “All right,” one of the girls said, “the first one to speak has to do them.” The trio retired to the living room to watch TV. When their neighbor, a school […]...
34. Перевод слова class Class – класс, группа, занятие, урок Перевод слова The working class – рабочий класс two classes of poets – поэты двух родов the senior class – последний год обучения When is Class? Когда начало занятий? Pine trees belong to the evergreen Class. Сосны принадлежат к классу вечнозеленых растений. I came by the second Class, and […]...
35. Paying for College Chris: Which colleges are you applying to? Marcella: None. I can’t afford to go to college. Even if I lived at home, Tuition, fees, and books are just too expensive. Chris: You could apply for Financial aid. Marcella: I don’t want to get a bunch of Loans and be In debt for the next 10 […]...
36. At the first session of a conversion class At the first session of a conversion class the minister conducting the class asked, “What must we do before we can expect forgiveness from sin?” After a long silence, one of the men in attendance raised his hand and said: “Sin?”...
37. The College Food Chain THE DEAN Leaps tall buildings in a single bound Is more powerful than a locomotive Is faster than a speeding bullet Walks on water Gives policy to God THE DEPARTMENT HEAD Leaps short buildings in a single bound Is more powerful than a switch engine Is just as fast as a speeding bullet Talks with […]...
38. Значение идиомы high-class [high-class] {adj.} Of the best quality; very good; superior. – Avoided by many careful speakers. When Mr. Brown got a raise inpay, Mrs. Brown started to look for a high-class apartment. Mrs. Smith always gets her clothing at high-class shops. Mr. Jonesalways gets his office workers from Burns Agency because they havehigh-class help. Compare: FIRST-CLASS....
39. Мой колледж/ My College На английском языке Перевод на русский язык My College Мой колледж My name is Elena. I’m sixteen years old. I live in Kazan city, Russia. I have recently graduated from my high school and entered the Kazan Medical College. It is one of the best colleges in the city. Besides, I have always wanted to […]...
40. The Teacher tells the class they are going to play a game The Teacher tells the class they are going to play a game, she will describe an object and the students will tell her what she had described. Teacher: “The first object is Red, Round, and has a stem.” Timmy: ” I know what it is, it’s an apple.” Teacher: “That’s right, I like the way […]...