A judge asked a defendant to please stand

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1. At night court, a man was brought in and set At night court, a man was brought in and set before the judge. The judge said, “State your name, occupation, and the charge.” The defendant said, “I’m Sparks, I’m an electrician, charged with battery.” The judge winced and said, “Bailiff! Put this man in a dry cell!”...
2. Judge: Is there any reason you could not serve Judge: Is there any reason you could not serve as a juror in this case? Juror: I don’t want to be away from my job that long. Judge: Can’t they do without you at work? Juror: Yes, but I don’t want them to know it....
3. When asked for her occupation When asked for her occupation, a woman charged with a traffic violation said she was a schoolteacher. The judge rose from the bench. “Madam, I have waited years for a schoolteacher to appear before this court,” he smiled with delight. “Now sit down at that table and write ‘I will not pass through a red […]...
4. Пословица / поговорка don’t judge a book by its cover / never judge a book by its cover – перевод и значение, пример использования Пословица / поговорка: don’t judge a book by its cover / never judge a book by its cover Перевод: не суди о книге по обложке Эквивалент в русском языке: встречают по одежке, провожают по уму Пример: That professor may seem slow and awkward, but don’t judge a book by its cover. He is one of […]...
5. Перевод слова judge Judge – судья; судить, оценивать, порицать Перевод слова Presiding judge – председательствующий судья to judge whether Smith is right or wrong – судить, прав Смит или неправ I judged him to be about 50 – мне показалось, что ему около пятидесяти judge not, that ye be not judged – не судите, да не судимы будете […]...
6. Talk to the judge A judge, bored and frustrated by a lawyer’s tedious arguments, had made numerous rulings to speed the trial along. The attorney had bristled at the judge’s orders, and their tempers grew hot. Finally, frustrated with another repetition of arguments he had heard many times before, the judge pointed to his ear and said, “Counselor, you […]...
7. Перевод слова shout Shout – кричать, звать, громкий крик Перевод слова Shouts of despair – вопли отчаяния to shout with delight – визжать от восторга to shout approval – шумно высказывать свое одобрение to shout for help – звать на помощь Do not Shout at me. Не кричи на меня. Mother Shouted for the children. Мама громко позвала […]...
8. A man is giving evidence in court and the defendant’s A man is giving evidence in court and the defendant’s barrister asks him “How far from the accident were you when it happened?” He replied “36 feet, 2 and a quarter inches” “Nonsence how can you be so precise” “Well I knew some bloody fool would ask me so I measured it.”...
9. Best advice possible Taylor was desperate for business, and was happy to be appointed by the court to defend an indigent defendant. The judge ordered Taylor, “You are to confer with the defendant in the hallway, and give him the best legal advice you can.” After a time, Taylor re-entered the courtroom alone. When the judge asked where […]...
10. Don’t arrest the judge A squad car driver was covering a quiet beat out in the sticks when he was amazed to find a former lieutenant on the police force covering the beat. He stopped the car and asked, “Why, Irish Mike, this wouldn’t be your new beat out here in the sticks, would it?” “That it is, “Irish […]...
11. Stupid people stories 02 Stupid people DEADHEADS A man in Orange County Municipal Court had been ticketed for driving alone in the carpool lane. He claimed that the four frozen cadavers in the mortuary van he was driving should be counted. The judged ruled that passengers must be alive to qualify. THIS WOULD BE ME The judge called the […]...
12. A tough case was being argued in court A tough case was being argued in court. The defense attorney, feeling that he was in trouble, sent the judge a bottle of hundred-year old brandy. The defendant was fit to be tied. “The judge’ll kill me. Trying to bribe him! We’re dead!” “I don’t think so,” his attorney told him. “I sent it in […]...
13. At a jury trial with the jury consisting of 8 men and 4 women At a jury trial with the jury consisting of 8 men and 4 women: Defendant: “Your Honor, I wish to change my plea.” Judge: “Is someone using undue influence to prompt you to change your mind?” Defendant: “No sir, when I pleaded Not Guilty I didn’t know there would be women on the jury. Since […]...
14. One day a man was walking in the woods when he got lost One day a man was walking in the woods when he got lost. For two days he roamed around trying to find a way out. He had not eaten anything during this period and was famished. Over on a rock ledge he spotted a bald eagle, killed it, and started to eat it. Surprisingly a […]...
15. Humor about Dumb Irishmen The local District Judge had given the defendant a lecture on the evils of drink. But in view of the fact that this was the first time the man had been drunk and incapable, the case was dismissed on payment of ten shillings costs. “Now don’t let me ever see your face again,” said the […]...
16. Диалог на английском языке с переводом “Can’t judge a books by its cover” Pansy Пэнзи Have you heard the news? Ты слышала, что случилось? Letitia Летиша What? Что? Pansy Пэнзи The new guy has been given the sack. Новенького уволили. Letitia Летиша Why? Почему? Pansy Пэнзи Remember some of our documents have been going missing? Well, last night he was caught red-handed stealing them by our security guard. […]...
17. Two story house A man appears before a judge one day, asking for a divorce. The judge quietly reviews some papers and then says, “Please tell me why you are seeking a divorce.” “Because,” the man says,”I live in a two-story house.” The Judge replies, “What kind of a reason is that? What is the big deal about […]...
18. Значение идиомы shout from the housetops [shout from the housetops] or [shout from the rooftops] {v. phr.},{informal} To tell everyone; broadcast, especially one’s own personalbusiness. Mr. Clark was so happy when his son was born that heshouted the news from the housetops. When Mary bleached her hair, her neighbors shouted it from the housetops....
19. Jokes about Dumb Irishmen The blind farmer was often taken for a walk in the fields by a kind neighbor. However kindly the neighbor might have been, he was undoubtedly a coward. When a bull charged towards them one day, he abandoned the blind man. The bull, puzzled by a lack of fear, nudged the farmer in the back. […]...
20. Значение идиомы stand to reason [stand to reason] {v. phr.} To seem very likely from the knownfacts. If you have a driver’s license, it stands to reason you candrive. Joe is intelligent and studies hard; it stands to reasonthat he will pass the examination....
21. Baby bear wants to live somewhere else The three bears had been having some trouble recently and had ended up in family court. Mama and Papa bear were splitting up, and baby bear had to decide who he was going to live with. So, the judge wanted to talk to baby bear to see what he thought about living with either of […]...
22. Three nuns went to a cucumber stand in an open market Three nuns went to a cucumber stand in an open market one day. They asked how much the cucumbers were. The merchant said that they were 4 for a dollar. The nuns said okay. The puzzled merchant asked why they needed four cucumbers when there were only three of them. A nun answered back, “Well, […]...
23. Did you kill the victim? Prosecutor: Did you kill the victim? Defendant: No, I did not. Prosecutor: Do you know what the penalties are for perjury? Defendant: Yes, I do. And they’re a heck of a lot better than the penalty for murder!...
24. Перевод слова killing Killing – убийство; охотничья добыча; смертельный, смертоносный Перевод слова There was a plentiful killing – охотники принесли богатую добычу killing pace – убийственная скорость killing work – изматывающая работа killing with intent – умышленное убийство Killing animals never was my rule. Я старался никогда не убивать животных. He got life for Killing the guard. Он […]...
25. Перевод слова electric Electric – электрический, наэлектризованный Перевод слова Electric light – электричество, электрическое освещение electric current – электрический ток electric atmosphere – наэлектризованная атмосфера Can you work an Electric drill? Вы можете работать электродрелью? The Electrical cord is damaged. Электрический шнур поврежден. It plugs into any Electric socket. Он подключается к любой электрической розетке. rel=”nofollow”>...
26. Значение идиомы charge something to something [charge something to something] {v.} 1. To place the blame on; make responsible for. John failed to win a prize, but he charged it to his lack of experience. The coach charged the loss of the game to the team’s disobeying his orders. 2. To buy something on the credit of. Mrs. Smith bought a […]...
27. Не судите о книге по ее обложке/ Do not Judge A Book By Its Cover На английском языке Перевод на русский язык Do not Judge A Book By Its Cover Не судите о книге по ее обложке I have never had a proper hobby, except reading. Reading is my favourite pastime, as it helps me to relax and forget about worries of the day. At the same time while reading […]...
28. Значение идиомы shout down [shout down] {v.} To object loudly to; defeat by shouting. Gracesuggested that we give our club money to charity, but she was shouteddown. The crowd shouted down the Mayor’s suggestions....
29. Значение идиомы race to stand still [race to stand still] {v. phr.} To be so far behind in one’s workthat one must exert an effort similar to that needed to win a race inorder simply not to fall even further behind. “Could you reviewthis book for us, Professor Brown?” the editor asked. “Unfortunately, no,” the professor answered. “I’m so behind in […]...
30. Перевод слова pace Pace – темп, поступь Перевод слова To go at a good pace – идти хорошим шагом to hold a hot pace – быстро идти killing pace – убийственная скорость I slacked my Pace. Я замедлил шаг. He lived at a fast Pace. Он жил в быстром темпе. They drive at a tremendous Pace. Они мчатся […]...
31. Фразовые глаголы с “HOLD” Hold all the cards – иметь преимущество hold back – скрывать hold down – придерживать hold in – проводить hold in check – сдерживать hold it – стой! подожди!; постой! hold on – держи(те)сь!; подожди(те) hold out – протягивать, вытягивать hold over – откладывать hold that – считать, что hold up – нападать, поднимать...
32. Traditions A man and a woman got married, and he told her : ” since you are my wife you should respect my traditions and habits…and i have 3 traditions. So, first tradition: On wednesdays i play football with my friends…no matter what..whether it snows or it rains…i dont care..i play football!! -Is it clear for […]...
33. Violin Q: How can you tell if a violin is out of tune? A: The bow is moving. Q: How do you make a violin sound like a viola? A: Sit in the back and don’t play. Q: How do you make a violin sound like a viola? A: Play in the low register with a […]...
34. Перевод слова bribe Bribe – взятка, подкуп Перевод слова To bribe an official – дать взятку должностному лицу to get a bribe – получить взятку to bribe a judge – подкупить судью We Bribed the children with candy. Мы подкупили детей конфетами. He Bribed one of the guards to smuggle out a note. Он подкупил одного из охранников, […]...
35. Значение идиомы stand the gaff [stand the gaff] {v. phr.}, {informal} To stand rough treatment; dowell in spite of great physical or mental hardship. An athlete mustlearn to stand the gaff. No person running for office gets farunless he can stand the gaff. Compare: HOLD OUT 2, STICK OUT 2....
36. The medical student was asked four reasons The medical student was asked four reasons why mother’s milk was better for babies than cow’s milk. This is the answer he submitted: 1. It’s fresher. 2. It’s cleaner. 3. The cats can’t get to it. 4. It’s easier to take on a picnic. He also added: “It comes in such cute containers.”...
37. An artist asked the gallery owner An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time. “I have good news and bad news,” the owner replied. “The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told […]...
38. Down in Florida, two widows were talking and one asked Down in Florida, two widows were talking and one asked the other, “Do you ever get to feeling horny?” “Yes,” her friend replied. “What do you do about it?” “I usually suck on a Lifesaver.” After a moment of stunned silence her friend asked, “Well, what beach do you go to?”...
39. Serving on a Jury Samantha: How was your first day on a Jury? Jinho: It was okay. The Judge swore us in and then we listened to the beginning of the Prosecutor’s case. Two Witnesses testified. Samantha: That sounds exciting! I’d love to be on a jury. Why didn’t they Sequester you? That’s what they do on TV. Jinho: […]...
40. Значение идиомы stand one’s ground [stand one’s ground] also [hold one’s ground] {v. phr.} 1. To stayand fight instead of running away. The enemy attacked in greatnumbers but our men stood their ground. Compare: GAIN GROUND. Contrast: GIVE GROUND, LOSE GROUND. 2. To defend a belief orstatement; refuse to weaken when opposed; insist you are right. John’s friends said he […]...