The last day working

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1. Talking to a Bank TellerBank Teller: Can I help you? Antonio: Yes, I’d like To deposit this Check. Bank Teller: Please fill out a Deposit slip and be sure To endorse the check on the back. Antonio: Here you are. I’ve already filled out a slip and signed the check. I’d also like To cash this other check. Bank ... Читать далее...
2. Using an ATMI went to bank this morning. Instead of standing in line to talk to a Bank teller, I decided to use an ATM, but it wasn’t working. Robin: Excuse me. Could you help me? I’m trying to use this ATM machine, but it stopped working after I put in my PIN and it won’t give ... Читать далее...
3. Two executives working in the garment center are having lunch togetherTwo executives working in the garment center are having lunch together. Goldstein says to his friend, «Last week was one of the worst weeks of my entire life.» «What happened?» asks Birnbaum. Goldstein moans, «My wife and I went to Florida on vacation. It rained for seven days and seven nights, so my wife went ... Читать далее...
4. Cashing a CheckThe local Branch of my bank is located just a few Blocks from where I live. It’s very convenient, since it has four ATMs open 24/7. Today I had to go in to make a Deposit, but since I wanted to Cash a check as well, I needed to go inside to talk to a ... Читать далее...
5. I’m at the wrong bankLetterman’s Top Ten Signs You’re Doing Business With The Wrong Bank 10. When you make a deposit, tellers high-five each other. 9. After you get a free toaster, bank president shows up at your house begging for toast. 8. Your monthly statements are handwritten, in crayon. 7. When you want to make a withdrawal, clerks ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова tellerTeller — рассказчик; кассир в банке Перевод слова Brilliant teller of stories — прекрасный рассказчик teller station — передающая станция teller machine — банковский автомат teller’s window — кассовое окно The Teller counted out ten $50 bills. Кассир отсчитал 10 пятидесяти долларовых купюр (банкнот). The bank Teller sat behind a glass partition. Кассир банка сидел ... Читать далее...
7. Jon starts working in a lumber campJon starts working in a lumber camp. The boss says, «We work twelve hours a day, we eat two meals a day, lights out at ten-thirty, and you can put your dick in the barrel over there for a blow job any day but Thursday.» Jon says, «Why not Thursday?» The boss says, «Because Thursday ... Читать далее...
8. Bank TellerBank Teller A middle aged man walks into the bank and says to the young teller, «I want to open a fucking checking account». «Please sir», she replies, «we can’t have language like that in here.» «Why the Fuck not?» he asked. «Sir,» Came her retort, «I must ask you to refrain from swearing.» «I ... Читать далее...
9. George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard IVVoice Mail. Never answer your phone if you have voice mail. People don’t call you just because they want to give you something for nothing — they call because they want YOU to do work for THEM. That’s no way to live. Screen all your calls through voice mail. If somebody leaves a voice mail ... Читать далее...
10. Working OvertimeJeremy: Hello. Miranda: Hi, it’s me. I can’t make it home for dinner tonight. I’m working Overtime. Jeremy: Again? That’s the third time this week. I can’t believe your boss is making you do this. Miranda: Don’t get mad, but I actually told him that I Didn’t mind. I know I’ve been working Long hours, ... Читать далее...
11. Steve, Bob and Jeff are working on a very high scaffoldingSteve, Bob and Jeff are working on a very high scaffolding. Suddenly, Steve falls off. He is killed instantaneously. After the ambulance leaves with Steve’s body, Bob and Jeff realize they’ll have to inform his wife. Bob says he’s good at this sort of sensitive stuff, so he volunteers to do the job. After two ... Читать далее...
12. George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard VIAppear to Work Late. Always leave the office late, especially when the boss is still around. You could read magazines and storybooks that you always wanted to read but have no time until late before leaving. Make sure you walk past the boss’ room on your way out. Send important emails at unearthly hours (e. ... Читать далее...
13. Перевод слова envelopeEnvelope — конверт, обложка, оболочка Перевод слова A stamped envelope — конверт с маркой envelope paper — оберточная или конвертная бумага to seal an envelope — запечатать конверт I recognised her handwriting on the Envelope. Я узнал ее почерк на конверте. A key was enclosed in the Envelope. В конверт был вложен ключ. The Earth ... Читать далее...
14. The definition of a phallic symbolThis girl walks in to a doctors office and she asks «Whats a failic symbol? Doctor says «you’re kidding..» Girl says «no! I don’t know! Whats a failic symbol???» Doctor pulls his pants and underwear down and says «You see? This is a failic symbol!» Girl says «Oh! Its just like a penis, only smaller»...
15. A site foreman had ten very lazy men working for himA site foreman had ten very lazy men working for him, so one day he decided to trick them into doing some work for a change. «I’ve got a really easy job today for the laziest one among you,» he announced. «Will the laziest man please put his hand up.» Nine hands went up. «Why ... Читать далее...
16. And I will do anything for loveThe beautiful secretary of the president of a bank goes on a sight-seeing tour with a very rich African king who was a very important client. The client out of the blue asks her to marry him. Naturally, the secretary is quite taken aback. However, she remembers what her boss told her, …don’t reject the ... Читать далее...
17. Значение идиомы on deposit[on deposit] {adv. phr.} In a bank. I have almost $500 ondeposit in my account. The children save their pennies and eachmonth place them on deposit....
18. George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard IIUse computers to look busy. Any time you use a computer, it looks like «work» to the casual observer. You can send and receive personal e-mail, calculate your finances and generally have a blast without doing anything remotely related to work. These aren’t exactly the societal benefits that the proponents of the computer revolution would ... Читать далее...
19. Opening a Bank AccountI decided to Switch banks recently, and after looking at my options, I Went for Mar Vista National Bank. I Drove over to the bank, parked next to the Drive-through teller lanes, and walked inside. I made my way to the new Accounts desk, and was greeted by John, one of the customer service representatives ... Читать далее...
20. Перевод слова bankBank — банк Перевод слова Bank borrowings — займы, получаемые в банке counterfeit bank-note — фальшивый банкнот to deposit money in a bank — внести деньги в банк My Bank balance isn’t good. Состояние моего банковского счета оставляет желать лучшего. The Bank bounced the cheque. Банк вернул чек. Our Bank merged with theirs. Наш банк ... Читать далее...
21. Using Different Payment SystemsPetra: Damn! That didn’t work either. Ken: What are you doing? Petra: I’m trying to pay for a new service I ordered, but the website won’t accept my Credit card as Payment. I even tried my Debit card, but it’s been Rejected, too. Ken: Why don’t you just write a Check and mail it in? ... Читать далее...
22. Using Different Payment SystemsPetra: Damn! That didn’t work either. Ken: What are you doing? Petra: I’m trying to pay for a new service I ordered, but the website won’t accept my Credit card as Payment. I even tried my Debit card, but it’s been Rejected, too. Ken: Why don’t you just write a Check and mail it in? ... Читать далее...
23. Fair businessHere’s one about the old native American who wanted a loan for $500. The banker pulled out the loan application, «What are you going to do with the money?» «Take jewlery to city and sell it,» was the response. «What have you got for collateral?» «Don’t know collateral.» «Well that’s something of value that would ... Читать далее...
24. Перевод слова depositDeposit — депозит, задаток; класть в банк, отдавать на хранение Перевод слова Short deposit — краткосрочный вклад to deposit documents with smb. — отдать документы на хранение кому-л. to require a deposit — требовать задаток A Deposit of 10% is required. Требуется депозит в размере 10%. We put down a Deposit on a house. Мы ... Читать далее...
25. My Working Day (6)В топике Мой рабочий день (6) я рассказываю о буднем дне и о занятиях в школе (или на работе). По утрам я встаю в 7 часов утра, делаю зарядку, убираю постель, умываюсь, одеваюсь и завтракаю. Иногда я сама готовлю завтрак. После школы (или работы) я выполняю домашнее задание и некоторую работу по дому. Позже я ... Читать далее...
26. An elderly man goes into a brothelAn elderly man goes into a brothel and tells the madam he would like a young girl for the night. Surprised, she looks at the ancient man and asks how old he is. «I’m 90 years old,» he says. «90!» replies the woman. «Don’t you realize you’ve had it?» «Oh, sorry,» says the old man, ... Читать далее...
27. A woman walks into her accountant’s office andA woman walks into her accountant’s office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant says, «Before we begin, I’ll need to ask a few questions.» He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, «What is your occupation?» The woman replies, «I’m a whore.» The accountant balks ... Читать далее...
28. A woman visits her physicianA woman visits her physician. After waiting for a while it’s finally her turn. She enters the doctors’ office and sits down. The PhD asks her: «Well, what can I do for you madam?». The patient blushes and the PhD sees that apparently she is embarrassed so he says: «You can discuss any matter with ... Читать далее...
29. What is intelligenceTwo men were digging a ditch on a very hot day. One said to the other, «Why are we down in this hole digging a ditch when our boss is standing up there in the shade of a tree?» «I don’t know,» responded the other. «I’ll ask him.» So he climbed out of the hole ... Читать далее...
30. Working Late at the OfficeI was so glad it was Friday afternoon. I’ve been thinking-TGIF-all day. I was On my way out of the office when I saw Nick sitting at his desk. Even though the office was nearly empty, he didn’t look like he was ready to leave. In fact, he looked like he was still Swamped with ... Читать далее...
31. Working for an Impossible BossMr. Mann: Why are all these people Milling around doing no work? Laura! You’re In charge when I’m out of the office and you’re Incompetent! Laura: Mr. Mann, we need to talk in private. Let’s go into your office. Mr. Mann: What is this about? Laura: Mr. Mann, I’ve tried to do my job the ... Читать далее...
32. Time Off from WorkMy buddy from college, Jack, was getting married and our friend Rob was planning a Bachelor party for him in Vegas. It was going to be the Last weekend of the month and I wanted to go. The trouble was, I was scheduled to work that weekend. I needed to get the Time off from ... Читать далее...
33. How many does it take?Joe is having a drink in his local bar when in walks this gorgeous woman. Joe, not being too shy, goes up and sits next to her. He buys her a drink and then another and then another. After this and the accompanying small-talk, Joe asks her back to his place for a «good time.» ... Читать далее...
34. Bad Japanese economyAccording to inside contacts, the Japanese banking crisis shows no signs of ameliorating. If anything, it’s getting worse. Following last week’s news that Origami Bank had folded, we are hearing that Sumo Bank has gone belly up, and Bonsai Bank plans to cut back some of its branches. Karaoke Bank is up for sale, and ... Читать далее...
35. A young bloke has started work on a propertyA young bloke has started work on a property, and the boss sends him up the back paddocks to do some fencing work, but come evening he’s half an hour late. The boss gets on the CB radio to check if he’s all right. «I’ve got a problem, Boss. I’m stuck ‘ere. I’ve hit a ... Читать далее...
36. During a recent publicity outingDuring a recent publicity outing, Hillary sneaked off to visit a fortune teller of some local repute. In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered grave news. «There’s no easy way to say this, so I’ll just be blunt: Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die ... Читать далее...
37. A woman walks into a tattoo parlourA woman walks into a tattoo parlour and asks ‘Do you do custom work?’ ‘Why of course!’ ‘Good. I’d like a portrait of Robert Redford on the inside of my right thigh, and a portrait of Paul Newman on the inside of my left thigh.’ ‘No problem,’ says the artist. ‘Strip from the waist down ... Читать далее...
38. A fortune tellerA man was wandering around a fairground and he happened to see a fortune-teller’s tent. Thinking it would be good for a laugh, he went inside and sat down. «Ah…..» said the woman as she gazed into her crystal ball. «I see you are the father of two children.» «That’s what you think,» said the ... Читать далее...
39. George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard IGeorge Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard I Never walk down the hall without a document in your hands. People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they’re heading for the cafeteria. People with a newspaper in their hand look like they’re ... Читать далее...
40. Returning from her vacationReturning from her vacation, the young secretary was telling anyone who would listen about what a fun time she had. She then asked for two weeks leave in which to get married. «But you just had two weeks off,» said the boss. «Why didn’t you get married then?» «What and ruin my vacation?» she whined....