George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard I

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1. George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard IV Voice Mail. Never answer your phone if you have voice mail. People don’t call you just because they want to give you something for nothing – they call because they want YOU to do work for THEM. That’s no way to live. Screen all your calls through voice mail. If somebody leaves a voice mail […]...
2. George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard III Messy desk. Top management can get away with a clean desk. For the rest of us, it looks like you’re not working hard enough. Build huge piles of documents around your workspace. To the observer, last year’s work looks the same as today’s work; it’s volume that counts. Pile them high and wide. If you […]...
3. George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard II Use computers to look busy. Any time you use a computer, it looks like “work” to the casual observer. You can send and receive personal e-mail, calculate your finances and generally have a blast without doing anything remotely related to work. These aren’t exactly the societal benefits that the proponents of the computer revolution would […]...
4. George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard VI Appear to Work Late. Always leave the office late, especially when the boss is still around. You could read magazines and storybooks that you always wanted to read but have no time until late before leaving. Make sure you walk past the boss’ room on your way out. Send important emails at unearthly hours (e. […]...
5. George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard IX Build Vocabulary. Read up on some computer magazines and pick out all the jargon and new products. Use it freely when in conversation with bosses. Remember: They don’t have to understand what you say, but you sure sound impressive....
6. Seventy year old George went for his annual physical Seventy year old George went for his annual physical. All of his tests came back with great results. Dr. Smith said, “George everything looks great physically. How are you doing mentally, emotionally and are you at peace with your self and have a good relationship with God?” George replied, “God and me are tight. We […]...
7. Значение идиомы hand [hand] See: AT HAND, BIRD IN THE HAND IS WORTH TWO IN THE BUSH, BITE THE HAND THAT FEEDS ONE, CLEAN HANDS, DIRTY ONE’S HANDS, EAT OUTOF ONE’S HAND, FORCE ONE’S HAND, FREE HAND, FROM HAND TO HAND, GLADHAND, HAM-HANDED, HANG HEAVY or HANG HEAVY ON ONE’S HANDS, HAT INHAND, HAVE A HAND IN, HAVE […]...
8. There were two bulls, a young one named George and an old one named Sam There were two bulls, a young one named George and an old one named Sam. It was that time of year to satisfy the local female population, and young George was pretty excited. “Sam, Sam, can I go down to those heifers over there?” asked George. “George, relax. Here is how it works. We’ll wait […]...
9. A site foreman had ten very lazy men working for him A site foreman had ten very lazy men working for him, so one day he decided to trick them into doing some work for a change. “I’ve got a really easy job today for the laziest one among you,” he announced. “Will the laziest man please put his hand up.” Nine hands went up. “Why […]...
10. This is what should happen to ALL CATS! This is what should happen to ALL CATS..! HOW TO WASH THE CAT 1. Thoroughly clean the toilet. 2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water and have both lids up. 3. Find the cat and soothe him while you carry him toward the bathroom. 4. In one smooth movement, put the […]...
11. Former George Harrison, Eric Clapton Muse Pattie Boyd Spills the Beans Pattie Boyd reveals details on her relationships with George Harrison and Eric Clapton in an autobiography. Legendary rock muse Pattie Boyd, who inspired Eric Clapton “Layla” and “Wonderful Tonight,” and, reputedly, George Harrison’s “Something,” is coming out with an autobiography, Wonderful Today, and doing interviews on her relationships with two of rock’s leading men. The […]...
12. Working from a Home Office Adrina: So this is your new home office. It’s nice. Victor: It’s Functional, and I like it. When my company decided to lower its Overhead by Decentralizing, it gave employees the option to work from home. When I heard that, I didn’t Think twice about making the change. Adrina: I’m not surprised. Lots of people […]...
13. Значение идиомы let George do it [let George do it] {v. phr.}, {informal} To expect someone else todo the work or take the responsibility. Many people expect to letGeorge do it when they are on a committee. Compare: PASS THE BUCK....
14. Перевод слова newspaper Newspaper – газета Перевод слова Newspaper file – подшивка газет newspaper heading – газетный заголовок to publish a newspaper – выпускать газету It was in some Newspaper. Это было в какой-то газете. Murdoch owns many Newspapers. Мердок владеет многими газетными изданиями. Did you see today’s Newspaper? Ты видел сегодняшнюю газету? Происхождение слова newspaper Сложное слово, […]...
15. George W. Bush was passing through an airplane terminal George W. Bush was passing through an airplane terminal and he noticed an old man in a long white robe, with a long white beard, long white hair and carrying two stone tablets in his arms. He approached the man and asked, “Aren’t you Moses?” But the man wouldn’t listen to him and continued walking. […]...
16. Перевод слова heading Heading – название, заголовок; направление, курс Перевод слова Feature heading – предметный заголовок chapter heading – название главы to fly a heading of – лететь курсом на to set the heading – задавать курс The bus is Heading toward town. Автобус движется в сторону города. The Fram lay moored with her bow Heading west. Фрам […]...
17. Using the Restroom Denzel: Excuse me, where is the Restroom? Server: It’s down the hall, on your left. Denzel: Thanks. When I got into the bathroom, it was a Mess. I walked into a Stall and there was Toilet paper all over the floor. There were no Toilet seat covers and the Toilet wouldn’t Flush. Even the Toilet […]...
18. Working on the road A fellow stopped at a rural gas station and, after filling his tank, he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. He stood by his car to drink his cola and he watched a couple of men working along the roadside. One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then […]...
19. The last day working “You Know It’s Your Last Day At Work When……” You hand a bank teller an envelope, and when she asks, “What’s this?”, you realize you just dropped the company’s deposit in a mailbox. A woman comes into the store, you turn to the other salesman and say, “I waited on the last fat ugly old […]...
20. Перевод слова false False – ошибочный, фальшивый, не настоящий Перевод слова False accusation – ложное обвинение false note – фальшивая нота false document – поддельный документ He registered at the hotel under a False name. Он зарегистрировался в гостинице под чужим именем. His friends played him False. Его друзья обманули его. She’s so False. Она такая врунья....
21. Types of Views Andrea: Help me decide on which type of hotel room To book. George: I want the one with a bed. Andrea: Very funny. We have a choice of different views, and each one is a different price. For instance, a room with a City view is $175 a night and a Panoramic view is $275 […]...
22. Working Overtime Jeremy: Hello. Miranda: Hi, it’s me. I can’t make it home for dinner tonight. I’m working Overtime. Jeremy: Again? That’s the third time this week. I can’t believe your boss is making you do this. Miranda: Don’t get mad, but I actually told him that I Didn’t mind. I know I’ve been working Long hours, […]...
23. Значение идиомы lay one’s hands on [lay one’s hands on] or [get one’s hands on] {v. phr.} 1. To seizein order to punish or treat roughly. If I ever lay my hands on thatboy he’ll be sorry. Compare: LAY A FINGER ON. 2. To get possessionof. He was unable to lay his hands on a Model T Ford for the schoolplay. […]...
24. Перевод слова impression Impression – впечатление, представление Перевод слова Painful impression – болезненное впечатление personal impression – личное впечатление to have the impression that – полагать, думать что I got the Impression that he is a bit tasty. У меня впечатление, что он имеет какое-то отношение к преступному миру. She failed to create any profound Impression. Ей не […]...
25. George Washington George Washington (1732-1799) won a lasting place in American History as the “Father of our Country”. For nearly twenty years he guided his country much as a father cares for a growing child. Washington lived an exciting life in exciting times. As a boy, he explored the wilderness. When he grew older, he helped the […]...
26. Staying in a Vacation Rental George: I’m kind of nervous staying in a Vacation rental for the first time. Marnie: Don’t worry. Before I Booked this unit, I checked it out thoroughly. It’s Pet-friendly and Kid-friendly, and it Sleeps six, so it’ll be perfect for the whole family. George: But there won’t be the same Amenities or services as a […]...
27. George W. Bush walks into a restaurant in Washington DC George W. Bush walks into a restaurant in Washington DC with his wife Laura. The waiter approaches the table and asks for his order. “I’ll have your biggest, juiciest London Broil,” answers the President. “But sir, what about the mad cow?!!” asks the waiter. “Oh,” answers Dubya, “she’ll order for herself.”...
28. Shortly after being assigned to a new base, a Lieutenant Shortly after being assigned to a new base, a Lieutenant and his wife were invited to the Colonel’s home for an evening of bridge. The Lieutenant was partnered with the Colonel’s wife and vice versa. After many hands, the Lieutenant excused himself to use the toilet, but accidentally left the door ajar. When the sound […]...
29. Значение идиомы on one’s hands [on one’s hands] {adv.} or {adj. phr.} In your care orresponsibility; that you must do something about. Mrs. Blake lefther five children with me while she shopped. I could not get anythingdone with the children on my hands. After everyone bought ticketsto the dance, the club treasurer had over $100 on his hands. Theelectricity went […]...
30. Soap dispenser Two priests are off to the showers late one night. They undress and step in the showers before they realize there is no soap. Father John says he has some soap in his room and goes to get it, not bothering to dress. He grabs two bars of soap in his hands and heads back […]...
31. Bloke is drinking at a pub Bloke is drinking at a pub and after a few rounds goes to leave, explaining to the barman he has to go home to do a shit. “Don’t be stupid,” says the barman, “We’ve got a perfectly good toilet here!” “Yes,” explains the drinker, “but I take salts.” “So what??!! That doesn’t matter – you […]...
32. Значение идиомы hand in hand [hand in hand] {adv. phr.} 1. Holding hands. Bob and Mary walkedalong hand in hand in the park. Compare: ARM IN ARM. 2. Accompanyingeach other; together; closely connected. – Used with “go”. Ignorance and poverty often go hand in hand. Selfishness andunhappiness often go hand in hand....
33. Working for an Impossible Boss Mr. Mann: Why are all these people Milling around doing no work? Laura! You’re In charge when I’m out of the office and you’re Incompetent! Laura: Mr. Mann, we need to talk in private. Let’s go into your office. Mr. Mann: What is this about? Laura: Mr. Mann, I’ve tried to do my job the […]...
34. Перевод слова toilet Toilet – туалет, уборная; костюм, одевание Перевод слова Morning toilet – утренний туалет summer toilets of the ladies – летние туалеты дам toilet stall – кабина в уборной Mummy, I need to go to the Toilet! Мамочка, мне нужно в туалет! She made Tina flush the pills down the Toilet. Она заставила Тину спустить таблетки […]...
35. Mrs. Jones is having her house painted Mrs. Jones is having her house painted, and her husband comes home from work and leans against the freshly painted wall. The next day, she says to the painter, “You wanna see where my husband put his hand last night?” He sighs and says, “Look, lady, I got a tough day’s work ahead of me. […]...
36. Значение идиомы many hands make light work [many hands make light work] If many people work together, even ahard job becomes easier. – A proverb. Come on boys, many hands makelight work. If we work together, we can finish painting the barn....
37. Значение идиомы carry a tune [carry a tune] {v. phr.} To sing the right notes without catching any false ones. Al is a wonderful fellow, but he sure can’t carry a tune and his singing is a pain to listen to....
38. Значение идиомы off one’s hands [off one’s hands] {adv. phr.} No longer in your care or possession. Ginny was glad to have the sick dog taken off her hands by thedoctor. Contrast: ON ONE’S HANDS....
39. My Working Day (5) В топике Мой рабочий день (5) я рассказываю, как я провожу свой день. Утром, встав в 7 часов, я делаю зарядку, застилаю постель, умываюсь, одеваюсь, завтракаю и в 8 утра выхожу из дома. В школе уроки начинаются в 9 часов утра. После школы я возвращаюсь домой, обедаю в 3 часа дня, отдыхаю, выполняю домашнее задание […]...
40. Working Late at the Office I was so glad it was Friday afternoon. I’ve been thinking-TGIF-all day. I was On my way out of the office when I saw Nick sitting at his desk. Even though the office was nearly empty, he didn’t look like he was ready to leave. In fact, he looked like he was still Swamped with […]...