Judy arrived home from her date

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1. On a first date, a guy escorts a girl home and asksOn a first date, a guy escorts a girl home and asks: Guy: Can I come up for a cup of coffee? Girl: Actually, I never invite guys over on a first date. The guy thinks for a minute and says: Well, what about the last date?...
2. The young playboy took a blind date to anThe young playboy took a blind date to an amusement park. They went for a ride on the Ferris wheel. The ride completed, she seemed rather bored. «What would you like to do next?» he asked. «I wanna be weighed,» she said. So the young man took her over to the weight guesser. «One-twelve,» said ... Читать далее...
3. The young playboy took a blind date to an amusement parkThe young playboy took a blind date to an amusement park. They went for a ride on the Ferris wheel. The ride completed, she seemed rather bored. «What would you like to do next?» he asked. «I wanna be weighed,» she said. So the young man took her over to the weight guessed. «One-twelve,» said ... Читать далее...
4. Little Johnny comes home from schoolLittle Johnny comes home from school with a note from his teacher, indicating that «Johnny seems to be having some difficulty with the difference between boys and girls,» and would his mother,»please sit down and have a talk with Johnny about this.» So johnny’s mother takes him quietly, by the hand, upstairs to her bedroom, ... Читать далее...
5. Перевод идиомы up-to-date / up to date, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: up-to-date / up to date Перевод: современный, отвечающий последним требованиям Пример: The kitchen in our apartment is not up-to-date at all. Кухня в нашей квартире совсем не современная....
6. Too much attentionOne evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother to a nursing home and leaves her, hoping she will be well cared for. The next morning, the nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a window overlooking a lovely flower garden. She seems OK, but after a ... Читать далее...
7. The Mortitian arrived at the Mortuary one morningThe Mortitian arrived at the Mortuary one morning and was aproached by his assistant. «Anything interesting happen over-night», asked the mortitian. «Yes», replied the assistant, «The most gorgeous 18 year-old blond came in last night. Dead of course» «What was the cause of death», enquired the mortition. «I’m not sure»,replied the assistant. «But she’s got ... Читать далее...
8. One day, little Billy comes home from kindergartenOne day, little Billy comes home from kindergarten for lunch. Not finding his mother in the kitchen, or the living room, he heads upstairs to check her bedroom. He opens the door, and what does he see, but his father, who had also come home for lunch, stripped naked, on top of his mother, also ... Читать далее...
9. A man gets home early from workA man gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting. «What’s up?» he says. «I’m having a heart attack,» cries the woman. He rushes downstairs to grab the phone for ambulance, but just as he’s dialing, ... Читать далее...
10. Перевод слова dateDate — дата; свидание Перевод слова Delivery date — дата поставки the date of youth — юные годы, пора молодости date of birth — дата рождения to make a date with smb. — назначить свидание с кем-л. Is he still Dating Sarah? Он по прежнему встречается с Сарой? She has a hot Date with Michel. ... Читать далее...
11. Meeting Your Boyfriend’s/Girlfriend’s ParentsRonny: Ready? Judy: Ready as I’ll ever be. Ronny: Try To work up a little Enthusiasm about meeting my parents. Judy: It’s not them I’m worried about. It’s me. What if I don’t Pass muster? Ronny: My parents are going to love you. They’re Open-minded and Nonjudgmental people. They won’t care about anything except that ... Читать далее...
12. Перевод слова up-to-dateUp-to-date — современный, новейший Перевод слова Up-to-date maps — карты, показывающие современные границы, города и т. п. up-to-date model — новейшая модель to bring a report up-to-date — включить в доклад самые последние сведения The survey is patchy and by no means not as Up-to-date as one expects. Обзор отрывочный и, без сомнения, не такой ... Читать далее...
13. Значение идиомы to date[to date] {adv.} or {adj. phr.} Up to the present time; until now. To date twenty students have been accepted into the school. Thepolice have not found the runaway to date. Jim is shoveling snowto earn money, but his earnings to date are small. Syn.: SO FAR....
14. Amusing Humor about the IrishO’Toole volunteered to take care of his numerous children so that Mom could have an evening out. At bedtime he sent the youngsters upstairs to bed and settled down to read. One child kept creeping down the stairs, but O’Toole kept sending him back up. At 10 o’clock the doorbell rang. It was the next ... Читать далее...
15. A blonde came running home to her motherA blonde came running home to her mother, sobbing and hysterical. «What’s wrong?» her mum, (another blonde) asked. «My boyfriend’s just dropped me!» wailed the blonde. Her mother nodded wisely and started to tell her all about the birds and the bees. «No mum,» the blonde interrupted. «You don’t understand — I can fuck and ... Читать далее...
16. Driving home very drunkIt seems a gentleman had too much alcohol at a party, was heading home, and was pulled over by a state trooper. Upon being tested, the fellow couldn’t walk a straight line any more than he could drive one, so the trooper wrote out a ticket and had just given it to the driver before ... Читать далее...
17. The Plumber has arrivedA lady was expecting the plumber; he was supposed to come at ten o’clock. Ten o’clock came and went; no plumber; eleven o’clock, twelve o’clock, one o’clock; no plumber. She concluded he wasn’t coming, and went out to do some errands. While she was out, the plumber arrived. He knocked on the door; the lady’s ... Читать далее...
18. Перевод слова handbagHandbag — дамская сумочка Перевод слова Beaded handbag — бисерная сумочка ladies’ handbag — дамская сумка pouchette handbag — сумочка на завязках I’ve got far too much clobber in my Handbag. У меня в сумке слишком много всякого хлама. She roundhouseed Smith with a Handbag. Она ударила Смита наотмашь сумочкой. She propped the mirror against ... Читать далее...
19. A boy comes home from school and tells his motherA boy comes home from school and tells his mother that he got a part in the school play. «What part?» the mother asked. «I play a Jewish husband,» the boy replied. «Go back to school and tell your teacher that you want a speaking role!»...
20. A fair priceA college student picked up his date at her parents home. He’d scraped together every cent he had to take her to a fancy restaurant. To his dismay, she ordered almost everything expensive on the menu. Appetizers, lobster, champagne. . .the works. Finally he asked her, «Does your Mother feed you like this at home?» ... Читать далее...
21. Значение идиомы blind date[blind date] {n.} An engagement or date arranged by friends for people who have not previously known one another. A blind date can be a huge success, or a big disappointment....
22. Значение идиомы pull date[pull date] {n.}, {informal} The date stamped on baked goods, dairyproducts, or other perishable foods indicating the last day on whichthey may be sold before they must be removed from the shelves in aretail store. This pie is way past the pull date — small wonderit’s rotten....
23. The office playboy had a date with an attractive young womanThe office playboy had a date with an attractive young woman. The next day someone asked him how things had gone. «She uses too many four-letter words for me,» was the reply. «Really?» «Yes,» answered the playboy. «All evening long she was saying «don’t» and «stop» and «quit that.»...
24. Anybody Home?A boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employee’s home phone number and was greeted with a child’s whispered, «Hello?» Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to the youngster, the boss asked, «Is ... Читать далее...
25. Barry took a girl out on her first dateBarry took a girl out on her first date. When they pulled off into a secluded area around midnight, the girl said, «My mother told me to say no to everything.» «Well,» Barry said, «do you mind if I put my arm around you?» «No,» the girl replied. «Do you mind if I put my ... Читать далее...
26. Значение идиомы out of date[out of date] {adj. phr.} Old fashioned; superseded; no longervalid; too old to be used. Father’s suit is out of date; he needs anew one. The news magazines in the doctor’s office were all out ofdate....
27. A man and his date walk into a very posh Rodeo DriveA man and his date walk into a very posh Rodeo Drive furrier after having eaten a very expensive lunch at one of Beverly Hills most exclusive restaurants. «Show the lady your finest mink!» the fellow exclaims. So the owner of the shop goes in back and comes out with an absolutely gorgeous full-length coat. ... Читать далее...
28. Arriving home very drunkA man is in a bar and falling off his stool every couple of minutes. He is obviously drunk. So the bartender says to another man in the bar: «Why don’t you be a good Samaritan and take him home.» The man takes the drunk out the door and to his car and he stumbles ... Читать далее...
29. A young teenager comes home from schoolA young teenager comes home from school and asks her mother, «Is it true what Rita just told me? That babies come out of the same place where boys put their thingies?» «Yes, dear,» replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and she wouldn’t have to explain it. «But then when ... Читать далее...
30. Four nuns arrived at the gates of heavenFour nuns arrived at the gates of heaven. St. Peter makes the inspection. The first one says:»I have to confess, I held mans penis in one hand.» St. Peter says:»You see the bowl of holy water, wash your hand and go in.» The second says:»I have to confess, I held mans penis in both hands.» ... Читать далее...
31. Значение идиомы up-to-date[up-to-date] {adj.} Modern; contemporary; the latest that technologycan offer. «I want an up-to-date dictionary of American idioms,»Mr. Lee said, «that has all the latest Americanisms in it.» Contrast:STATE-OF-THE-ART....
32. Перевод идиомы out-of-date, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: out-of-date Перевод: старый, устаревший Пример: Computer equipment becomes out-of-date very quickly. Компьютерное оборудование очень быстро устаревает....
33. Ending a Bad DateI was on a date From hell. I agreed to go out with this guy who lives in the same apartment building as I do, but he’s turned out to be a real Creep. He was nice enough at the start of the date, but then he started drinking. Now he’s Drunk and I’m miserable. ... Читать далее...
34. Apologizing for a Bad DateI really Blew it last night. I finally asked my neighbor, Fatima, out on a date and she Walked out on me in the middle of it. I didn’t blame her. I wanted To make a good impression on her, but I felt I was Floundering a half an hour into the date. I decided ... Читать далее...
35. Пословица / поговорка there’s no place like home — перевод и значение, пример использованияПословица / поговорка: there’s no place like home Перевод: нет ничего лучше дома (происходит из песни «Home, sweet home») Эквивалент в русском языке: в гостях хорошо, а дома лучше Пример: After his long trip, Bob came into his house, sat down in his favorite chair, and happily sighed, «There’s no place like home.» После долгой ... Читать далее...
36. Home Is Where the Heart IsВ топике Дом там, где сердце — я хочу поделиться своими мыслями: что значит для каждого человека понятие «родной дом». Я думаю, что дом – это маленький мир, где человек живет в соответствии со своими собственными правилами, это место, где вы чувствуете комфорт, уют и надежность, и это место, куда всегда хочется вернуться. Дом — ... Читать далее...
37. Eating a Home-Cooked MealLouise: What’s the matter with you? Gil: I just got off the phone with my mom and she says they’re planning a welcome-home party for me next week – at a restaurant! Louise: What’s wrong with that? Gil: After Living abroad for a year, I was really looking forward to a Home-cooked meal. Louise: Why ... Читать далее...
38. Subjects for a dateA boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice. The father replies: «My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy.» The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. ... Читать далее...
39. Mrs. Schmidlap hires a maid with beautiful blonde hairMrs. Schmidlap hires a maid with beautiful blonde hair. The first morning, the girl pulls off the hair and says, «I wear a wig, because I was born totally hairless. Not a hair on my body, not even down there.» That night, Mrs. Schmidlap tells her husband. He says, «I’ve never seen anything like that. ... Читать далее...
40. Application For Permission To Date My DaughterNote: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your physician. Name:______________________________________________________ Date of Birth:________________ Height:_____________________ Weight:______ IQ:___________________________ GPA:_____________ Social Security Number:_____ Driver’s License Number:______ Boy Scout Rank:_____________ Telephone:____________________ Home Address:______________________________________________ City:_______________________ State:________________________ Zip:_____________ 1.Do you have one male and one ... Читать далее...