Finding a Roommate

Carlos: Now that your boyfriend has moved out, you need a Roommate. There’s no way you can Afford this apartment on your own.

Inez: I know, but I really don’t want to live with a Stranger. I’d have To put up with all of their Quirks.

Carlos: I don’t think you have a choice. You need someone To split the Rent and the cost of Utilities, not to mention your Cable bill.

Inez: I’d need someone who could keep the Common areas neat and clean, and who can Keep their hands off my stuff.

Carlos: I’m sure you’ll manage to find someone with those qualities.

Inez: They’d have to help with Chores around the apartment, too, and Pitch in with general Upkeep.

Carlos: No doubt there’s someone out there who wouldn’t mind doing that.

Inez: Hey, aren’t you looking for a place to live? You could move in here.

Carlos: You mean share an apartment with you? No thanks.

Inez: Why not?

Carlos: I’d just rather not. I don’t think we’d Suit.

Inez: Why wouldn’t we?

Carlos: Do you really want me To spell it out for you?

Inez: Yes, in fact, I Insist.

Carlos: All right. Let’s just say that you’re a little bit Grouchy in the mornings. You know that monster in the Alien movies?

Inesz: Yes. [silence.]

Carlos: Ouch! Ouch! Stop hitting me!


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Finding a Roommate