Evaluating employees
RE: Quotes Taken from actual performance evaluations:
“Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.”
“His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.”
“I would not allow this employee to breed.”
“This associate is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definitely won’t be.”
“Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.”
“When she opens her mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever foot was previously in there.”
“He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.”
“This young lady has delusions of adequacy.”
“He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.”
“This employee should go far – and the sooner he starts, the better.”
“This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.”
(1 оценок, среднее: 5.00 из 5)Related topics:
- British Military Officer Fitness Reports The British Military writes OFR’s (officer fitness reports). The form used for Royal Navy and Marines fitness reports is the S206. The following are actual excerpts taken from people’s “206’s”….... ...
- Army fitness report British Military Officer Fitness Reports The British Military writes OFR’s (officer fitness reports). The form used for Royal Navy and Marines fitness reports is the S206. The following are actual... ...
- Sweet, Sweet Road Rage An elderly lady was stopped to pull into a parking space when a young man in his new red Mercedes went around her and parked in the space she was... ...
- The boss called one of his employees into the office The boss called one of his employees into the office. “Rob,” he said, “you’ve been with the company for a year. You started off in the post room, one week... ...
- Перевод слова whichever Whichever – какой бы ни, любой, какой угодно Перевод слова Whichever occurs first – в зависимости от того, что произойдет раньше whichever is less – меньшая из двух whichever is... ...
- A tough dilemma Boss, to four of his employees: “I’m really sorry, but I’m going to have to let one of you go.” Black Employee: “I’m a protected minority.” Female Employee: “And I’m... ...
- Перевод слова depth Depth – глубина Перевод слова Depth of her knowledge – глубина ее знаний to reach a depth – опуститься на глубину to lack depth – быть неглубоким, поверхностным The pressure... ...
- A policeman was patrolling near midnight A policeman was patrolling near midnight at a local parking spot overlooking a golf course. He drove by a car and saw a couple inside with the dome light on.... ...
- Dealing with Unhappy Employees Asa: I don’t know how we Got stuck with reviewing employee Complaints. This has got to be the worst job ever! Samantha: This is important work and somebody has to... ...
- Working in a Dead End Job Agency employee: Tell me why you’d like to sign up with our Employment agency. Kurt: Well, right now I’m working in a Dead end job. There are no opportunities for... ...
- Значение идиомы beyond one’s depth [beyond one’s depth] {adj.} or {adv. phr.} 1. Over your head in water; in water too deep to touch bottom. Jack wasn’t a good swimmer and nearly drowned when he... ...
- Перевод слова lady Lady – леди, женщина Перевод слова Great lady – знатная дама you’ve dropped your gloves, lady! – женщина, вы обронили перчатки! foxy lady – соблазнительная женщина your good lady –... ...
- It was the age when knighthood was in flower It was the age when knighthood was in flower. A young lady was pounding away at a piece of iron with a sledgehammer. Another young lady saw her and asked,... ...
- The young couple was engaged in a most affectionate The young couple was engaged in a most affectionate embrace when there came the sound of a key in the front door. The young lady broke away at once, eyes... ...
- The three wishes An old lady is rocking away the last of her days on her front porch, reflecting on her long life, when–all of a sudden–a fairy godmother appears in front of... ...
- A little old lady gets onto a crowded bus A little old lady gets onto a crowded bus and stands in front of a seated young girl. Holding her hand to her chest, she says to the girl, “If... ...
- Значение идиомы foot [foot] See: AT ONE’S FEET, COLD FEET, DEAD ON ONE’S FEET, DRAGONE’S FEET, FROM HEAD TO FOOT, GET OFF ON THE WRONG FOOT, GET ONE’SFEET WET, HAND AND FOOT, KEEP... ...
- A young lady walks into a doctors office A young lady walks into a doctors office. “Doctor I’m suffering from a terrible discharge” The Doctor lays her down lifts up her dress and has a good probe around... ...
- Перевод слова personal Personal – личный, персональный Перевод слова Personal opinion – личное мнение personal needs – личные потребности to become personal – переходить на личности personal charm – личное обаяние personal computer... ...
- Перевод слова employee Employee – служащий, работающий по найму Перевод слова The mill’s employees – рабочие и служащие фабрики to sack an employee – уволить сотрудника employee bonus – премия работникам Each Employee... ...
- On their first night to be together On their first night to be together, the newly wed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom, all showered and wearing her beautiful robe. The... ...
- A door-to-door vacuum salesman goes A door-to-door vacuum salesman goes to the first house in his new territory. He knocks, a real mean and tough looking lady opens the door, and before she has a... ...
- Ordering at a Sandwich Shop Employee: Welcome to Grubway. What can I get for you? Jared: I’m still deciding. I’m trying to lose weight and I hear that eating a sandwich for lunch every day... ...
- Перевод слова foot Foot – ступня, нога, основание Перевод слова At the foot of the bed – в ногах кровати the foot of a ladder – основание лестницы non-kicking foot – опорная нога... ...
- A little boy and his dad are standing in line A little boy and his dad are standing in line at the grocery store behind a big fat lady. The little boy says, “hey dad, look how fat that lady... ...
- E-commerce E-commerce – commerce conducted over the Internet, most often via the World Wide Web. E-commerce can apply to purchases made through the Web or to business-to-business activities such as inventory... ...
- Losing Employees to Other Companies Diego: That’s three in six months! Natalie: What’s three in six months? Diego: That’s three of this company’s employees who have been Hired away by other companies. First, there was... ...
- Training Inexperienced Employees Kazuko: I really appreciate you helping with the training of the Newbies. I couldn’t have done it without you. Martin: Don’t mention it. I remember when I was still Wet... ...
- The young lady entered the doctor’s office carrying an infant The young lady entered the doctor’s office carrying an infant. “Doctor,” she explained, “the baby seems to be ailing. Instead of gaining weight, he lost three ounces this week.” The... ...
- A real bastard A little boy is standing at the side of a river, weeping. His tears are streaming down his cheeks. An elderly lady passes by and feels pity for him. “What... ...
- Значение идиомы on foot [on foot] {adv.} or {adj. phr.} 1. By walking. Sally’s bicyclebroke and she had to return home on foot. 2. Being planned. Thereporter said that a civil rights demonstration was... ...
- Dealing With Foot Problems Walt: What are you doing? Francesca: I’m selecting and organizing my photos for a Presentation. Walt: Oh, can I see? All of these photos are of feet! Francesca: Well, I... ...
- Kiss meyeah! “Kiss me,” said the young lady urgently. “Please kiss me.” But the young man turned his head away, saying, “Of course not. How can I? I’m your own brother-in-law. Hell,... ...
- This young lady, a flighty young thing This young lady, a flighty young thing, got a job cleaning the bank windows in the evening after the bank closed for business. Anyway, she was up this ladder, cleaning... ...
- Applying for Unemployment Benefits Agency Employee: Hello, state Unemployment agency. George: Hello, I’d like to apply for Unemployment benefits. Agency Employee: Okay, give me your address and I’ll send you an application. George: How... ...
- Humor about Drunk Irishmen A man was on a walking holiday in Ireland. He became thirsty so decided to ask at a home for something to drink. The lady of the house invited him... ...
- Picking up a Rental Car Ralph: I have a Reservation for a car. Clerk: What is the last name on the reservation? Ralph: It’s Furcal. Clerk: Just one moment. I have a reservation for Ralph... ...
- The Big Horse Race Horses in the race are: 1. Passionate Lady 2. Bare Belly 3. Silk Panties 4. Conscience 5. Jockey Shorts 6. Clean Sheets 7. Thighs 8. Big Johnson 9. Heavy Bosum... ...
- Work Environment Work Environment: (Wise manager) + (Wise employee) = PROFIT (Wise manager) + (Dumb employee) = PRODUCTION (Dumb manager) + (Wise employee) = PROMOTION (Dumb manager) + (Dumb employee) = OVERTIME...
- Passing a parrot A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, “Hey lady,... ...