The fucking lights

Related topics:

1. Thirty minutes before a plane landed, its cabin lights came onThirty minutes before a plane landed, its cabin lights came on, indicating to the flight attendants that breakfast could be served. One of the passengers, upset because he was awakened, growled, «Who turned on the fucking lights!» «Oh, no sir,» the nearest flight attendant replied. «Those are the breakfast lights. You slept through the ‘fucking ... Читать далее...
2. In a long line of people waiting for a bank tellerIn a long line of people waiting for a bank teller, one guy suddenly started massaging the back of the person in front of him. Surprised, the man in front turned and snarled, «Just what the hell you are doing?» «Well,» said the guy, «you see, I’m a chiropractor and I could see that you ... Читать далее...
3. Значение идиомы according to one’s own lights[according to one’s own lights] {adv. phr.} In accordance with one’s conscience or inclinations. Citizens should vote according to their own lights....
4. Fucking bearOnes there was a wild-wild bear. He went through the wild dark fores an? drank beer, so he was drunk. — People don’t understand me, fucking people… I want to fuck them… i wanna fuck all the mankind! A second latter a wild hunter fucked a wild bear into his ass…...
5. Fucking onion— boy, I need some onion — sorry, mam, we don’t have onion at the moment — I don’t care, I need some onion — but mam, we don’t have onion in the market right now — you don’t understand me, I need some onion — well, mam, lets check your english. How many letters ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова stewardessStewardess — стюардесса Перевод слова Air stewardess — бортпроводница chief stewardess — старшая стюардесса As such the applicant who is a flight Stewardess can only compare herself to other flight stewardesses. Поэтому истец, которая является стюардессой, может сравнивать себя только с другими стюардессами. First he cheated on me with a Stewardess named Monique. Сначала изменил ... Читать далее...
7. Перевод слова cabinCabin — будка, каюта, хижина Перевод слова First-class cabin — каюта первого класса driver’s cabin — кабина водителя crew cabin — кабина экипажа We were snug in the Cabin. Мы уютно устроились в салоне. He repaired to his Cabin in the woods. Он возвратился в свою хижину в лесу. The Cabin was compact but perfectly ... Читать далее...
8. Fuckingfucking [fAkIN] (471) употребляется как: V— Глагол (иметь сексуальные отношения с кем-либо; в принципе может быть и существительным с тем же значением); a — Прилагательное; adv — Наречие. В последних двух случаях к сексу не имеет никакого отношения. Примечание 1: Здесь, чаще чем где-либо, а именно в 30% случаев, встреч. пропуск конечного (g) с заменой ... Читать далее...
9. No exitAn airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde stewardess; the route they were flying had a stay-over in another city. Upon their arrival the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the ... Читать далее...
10. A mother and her son were flying Southwest AirlinesA mother and her son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas to Chicago. The son, who had been looking out the window, turned to his mother and said, «If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don’t big planes have baby planes?» The mother, who couldn’t think of an answer, ... Читать далее...
11. Catching the bearTwo men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran ... Читать далее...
12. Значение идиомы out of character[out of character] {adv.} or {adj. phr.} 1. Not in agreement with aperson’s character or personality; not in the way that a personusually behaves or is expected to behave; not usual; unsuitable;uncharacteristic. Mary is a nice girl. Her fit of temper was out ofcharacter. 2. Not in character; unsuitable for a part or character. It ... Читать далее...
13. There was an exhibitionist who was taking a trip on an airplaneThere was an exhibitionist who was taking a trip on an airplane. At the top of the stairs there was a stewardess collecting tickets. When the man got to the top of the stairs, he opened his coat and exposed himself. The stewardess said, «I’m sorry sir. You have to show your ticket here, not ... Читать далее...
14. Значение идиомы get a rise out of[get a rise out of] {v. phr.}, {slang} 1. To have some fun with by making angry; tease. The boys get a rise out ofJoe by teasing him about his girl friend. 2. {vulgar}, {avoidable} Tobe sexually aroused Jim always gets a rise out ofwatching adult movies....
15. A young female teacher was giving an assignmentA young female teacher was giving an assignment to her Grade 6 class one day. It was a large assignment so she started writing high up on the chalkboard. Suddenly there was a giggle from one of the boys in the class. She quickly turned and asked, «What’s so funny Pat?» «Well teacher, I just ... Читать далее...
16. Значение идиомы throw together[throw together] {v.} 1. also [slap together] To make in a hurryand without care. Bill and Bob threw together a cabin out of oldlumber. The party was planned suddenly, and Mary threw together ameal out of leftovers. 2. To put in with other people by chance. The group of strangers was thrown together when the ... Читать далее...
17. Перевод слова maleMale — мужчина, мужской, мужского пола Перевод слова Male voice choir — мужской хор male fern — мужской папоротник male midwife — акушер male pigeon — голубь-самец A Male duck is a drake. Самец утки — это селезень. The Male has a white breast. У самцов грудка белая. Does Christianity promote Male domination over women? ... Читать далее...
18. These two guys are car pooling home from work one dayThese two guys are car pooling home from work one day. Traffic is barely crawling along and they are both a bit bored. So the driver is looking around and suddenly he points at two dogs having sex on someone’s front lawn. «Look», he shouts «What are the those dogs doing? are they fighting?» The ... Читать далее...
19. Stuck orgasmA guy went into a bar and met a nice girl. They have a few drinks and soon wound up at his place, in bed. They’re having a great time. She was on top when suddenly she had an epileptic seizure — she was shaking and foaming at the mouth. Our uninformed male thought this ... Читать далее...
20. How do you tell if you’re making love to a nurseQ: How do you tell if you’re making love to a nurse, a schoolteacher, or an airline stewardess? A: A nurse says: «This won’t hurt a bit.» A schoolteacher says, «We’re going to have to do this over and over again until we get it right.» An airline stewardess says, «Just hold this over your ... Читать далее...
21. HappensFor all of you out there who’ve had to deal with an irate customer, this one is for you. It’s a classic! In tribute to those ‘special’ customers we all love! An award should go to the United Airlines gate agent in Denver for being smart and funny, and making her point, when confronted with ... Читать далее...
22. Значение идиомы in character[in character] {adv.} or {adj. phr.} 1. In agreement with aperson’s character or personality; in the way that a person usuallybehaves or is supposed to behave; as usual; characteristic; typical;suitable. John was very rude at the party, and that was not incharacter because he is usually very polite. The way Judycomforted the little girl was ... Читать далее...
23. Перевод слова passengerPassenger — пассажир Перевод слова Passenger liner — пассажирский лайнер first-class passenger — пассажир первого класса tourist-class passenger — пассажир туристического класса transit passenger — транзитный пассажир Neither the driver nor the Passengers were hurt. Ни водитель, ни пассажиры не были травмированы. Passengers for the next flight should go to the last gate. Пассажиры, улетающие ... Читать далее...
24. Значение идиомы turn down[turn down] {v.} 1. To reduce the loudness, brightness, or forceof. The theater lights were turned down. Turn down that radio, will you? The hose was throwing too much water so I turned downthe water a little bit. 2. To refuse to accept; reject. Hisrequest for a raise was turned down. If she offers to ... Читать далее...
25. This man was having problems getting it up to have sexThis man was having problems getting it up to have sex with his wife, so he went to the doctor for advice. The doctor told him the next time he wanted to have sex, to stick his finger in his wife’s pussy, and then rub it under his nose, and the smell would cause his ... Читать далее...
26. Business TripsТопик Командировки повествует о том, как важно для бизнесменов, совершающих частые деловые поездки, выбрать хороший отель, где предоставляются многочисленные необходимые услуги. Вы узнаете и о том, когда нужно прибыть в аэропорт и как правильно вести себя на борту самолета. Never before in the history of the world have businessmen traveled as much as they do ... Читать далее...
27. Paying billsWalking up to a department store’s fabric counter, a pretty girl asked, «I want to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?» «Only one kiss per yard, » replied the smirking male clerk. «That’s fine,» replied the girl. «I’ll take ten yards.» With expectation and anticipation written all over his ... Читать далее...
28. I am called a PrincessThe United Airline’s passenger cabin was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant who seemed to put everyone into a good mood as he served them food and drinks. As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and announced to the passengers, «Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that ... Читать далее...
29. NOTIFICATION TO ALL STAFF REGARDING LANGUAGEIt has been brought to our attention that some individuals have been using foul language during the execution of their duties. Due to complaints from managers who are more easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated. We do realise, however, the importance of staff being able to properly express their feelings ... Читать далее...
30. Значение идиомы boyfriend[boyfriend] {n.}, {informal} 1. A male friend or companion. «John and his boyfriends have gone to the ball game,» said his mother. 2. A girl’s steady date, a woman’s favorite man friend; a male lover or sweetheart. Jane’s new boyfriend is a senior in high school. Contrast: GIRLFRIEND....
31. Two eagles are soaring along when suddenlyTwo eagles are soaring along when suddenly a passenger jet screams past them. One eagle says to the other, «Wow, did you see how fast that thing was moving?» The other replies, «Yeah. You’d move fast too if you had three assholes and they were all on fire!»...
32. RepetitivenessAfter the lavish wedding reception, the newlyweds retired to their Honeymoon Suite. The groom turned down the lights and found some nice CDs to stack on the player. Then he excused himself and returned in pajamas and robe. He opened a bottle of champagne and poured them each a drink, unaware that his new bride ... Читать далее...
33. Going on a CruiseConnie: I’m so excited! We’re finally taking a Cruise. Are you sure this is the Embarkation area? Robert: Yes, I’m sure. We go On board right here, see? Come on, let’s find our Cabin. Connie: Okay, but I want to go up On deck as soon as possible and look around the entire ship. Do ... Читать далее...
34. Biology ClassIn a biology class, the professor was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen. A young female (FRESHMAN) raised her hand and asked, «If I understand, you’re saying there is a lot of glucose, as in sugar in male semen?» «That’s correct», responded the professor, going on to add statistical info. Raising her hand ... Читать далее...
35. ATM proceduresChase is very pleased to announce that we are installing new Drive-thru ATMs where customers will be able withdraw cash without leaving their vehicle. (Other accounts can also utilise this facility) Male and Female procedures have been tailored to best reflect the behaviors of those particular groupings. PROCEDURE FOR MALE CUSTOMERS: 1. Drive up to ... Читать далее...
36. Bank TellerBank Teller A middle aged man walks into the bank and says to the young teller, «I want to open a fucking checking account». «Please sir», she replies, «we can’t have language like that in here.» «Why the Fuck not?» he asked. «Sir,» Came her retort, «I must ask you to refrain from swearing.» «I ... Читать далее...
37. Значение идиомы pinup girl[pinup girl] {v. phr.} An attractive girl whose picture is pinnedor tacked to the wall by an admirer. Some Hollywood actresses areunderstandably very popular pinup girls among male soldiers....
38. Three college roommates — two females and a maleThree college roommates — two females and a male — began to argue after dinner about whose turn it was to do the dishes. «All right,» one of the girls said, «the first one to speak has to do them.» The trio retired to the living room to watch TV. When their neighbor, a school ... Читать далее...
39. Перевод слова riseRise — подниматься, вставать, восходить Перевод слова To rise to the emergency — быть на высоте положения to rise in smb.’s esteem — подняться в чьих-л. глазах the moon rose red — взошла красная луна Christ is Risen! Христос воскрес! My stomach Rises. Меня тошнит. This will arrest the Rise in prices. Это приостановит рост ... Читать далее...
40. Значение идиомы turn to[turn to] {v.} To begin working with much energy. All the boysturned to and cleaned the cabin in a few minutes. Mary turned toand studied for the test. Syn.: FALL TO....