The Barber Shop

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1. Cronin goes to a barber shop to get his hair cutCronin goes to a barber shop to get his hair cut. The barber cuts his hair, and after he gets done, as Cronin gets up and is taking out his money, the barber goes over and takes a leak in the corner of the barber shop. The barber finishes and comes back. As Cronin hands ... Читать далее...
2. Barber gives free cutsA barber gave a haircut to a priest one day. The priest tried to pay for the haircut, but the barber refused, saying, «you do God’s work.» The next morning the barber found a dozen bibles at the door to his shop. A policeman came to the barber for a haircut, and again the barber ... Читать далее...
3. A man enters a barber shop for a shaveA man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks. «I have just the thing,» says the barber taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. «Just place this between your cheek and gum.» The ... Читать далее...
4. A cowboy walked into a barber shopA cowboy walked into a barber shop, sat on the barber’s chair and said, «I’ll have a shave and a shoe shine.» The barber began to lather his face while a woman with the biggest, firmest, most beautiful breasts that he had ever seen knelt down and began to shine his shoes. The cowboy said, ... Читать далее...
5. Visit the barberA man and a little boy entered a barbershop together. After the man received the full treatment — shave, shampoo, manicure, haircut, etc. — he placed the boy in the chair. «I’m goin’ to buy a green tie to wear for the parade,» he said. «I’ll be back in a few minutes.» When the boy’s ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова barberBarber — мужской парикмахер, цирюльник Перевод слова Barber college — школа парикмахерского дела at the barber’s — в парикмахерской barber’s shop — цирюльня He goes to a Barber downtown. Он ходит к парикмахеру в центре города. The Barber did a real job on my hair. Парикмахер проделал серьезую работу над моими волосами....
7. The barber was finishing a haircutThe barber was finishing a haircut on a customer one day and started to apply some ‘Aftershave Lotion’ around his ears when the customer yelled, «Don’t put that crap on me! My wife says it smells like a French Whorehouse!» Another customer who was waiting replied, «Hey John, you can put the ‘Aftershave Lotion’ on ... Читать далее...
8. Перевод слова shopShop — магазин, лавка, буфет; ходить по магазинам Перевод слова Close up a shop — закрыть магазин coffee shop hours — время работы кафе to keep a shop — иметь магазин She works in a Shop. Она работает в магазине. It’s not available in the Shops. Этого нет в магазинах. Many people now Shop online. ... Читать далее...
9. Haircut before a tripA man was getting a haircut prior to a trip to Rome. He mentioned the trip to the barber who responded, «Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It’s crowded & dirty and full of Italians. You’re crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?» «We’re taking TWA,» was the reply. ... Читать далее...
10. Перевод идиомы close up shop / shut up shop, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: close up shop / shut up shop Перевод: закрывать лавочку, свернуть дело (временно или навсегда) Пример: I can’t make any money in this town. The time has come to close up shop and move to another town. У меня не получается ничего заработать в этом городке. Пришло время закрываться и переезжать в другой городок....
11. A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shopA tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco’s Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner the price. «Twelve dollars for the rat, sir,» says the shop ... Читать далее...
12. A dog walks into a butcher shopA dog walks into a butcher shop with a purse strapped around his neck. He walks up to the meat case and calmly sits there until it’s his turn to be waited on. A man, who was already in the butcher shop, finished his purchase and noticed the dog. The butcher leaned over the counter ... Читать далее...
13. A man walks into a jewellers shopA man walks into a jewellers shop, unzips his trousers and places his tool upon the counter. The lady serving says: «I’m sorry Sir, this is a clock shop not a cock shop.» «Well, put two hands and a face on this.» replies the man....
14. A duck in the shopA duck walks into a shop and asks the manager: -Got any fresh fruit? -No. -Got any fresh vegetables? -No. We have only dry goods. The next day the duck returns: -Got any fresh fruit? -No. -Got any fresh vegatables? -No. I told you yesterday, we have only dry goods. If you come back tomorrow ... Читать далее...
15. Значение идиомы close up shop[close up shop] {v. phr.} 1. To shut a store at the end of a day’s business, also, to end a business. The grocer closes up shop at 5 o’clock. After 15 years in business at the same spot, the garage closed up shop. 2. {informal} To stop some activity; finish what you are doing. ... Читать далее...
16. Значение идиомы closed shop[closed shop] {n. phr.} 1. A plant or factory that employs only union workers. Our firm has been fighting the closed shop policy for many years now. 2. A profession or line of work dominated by followers of a certain mode of thinking and behaving that does not tolerate differing views or ideas. Certain groups ... Читать далее...
17. Little Johnny’s dad is sitting on the side of the bedLittle Johnny’s dad is sitting on the side of the bed rolling on a condom about to give his wife some. Little Johnny sticks his head in the door, sees his dad and says, «Whatcha doin’ Daddy?» Johnny’s dad stoops over to cover up his dick and starts looking at the floor. «Oh, I’m just ... Читать далее...
18. A woman walks into a shop that sells very expensive Persian rugsA woman walks into a shop that sells very expensive Persian rugs. She looks around and spots the perfect rug and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the texture of the rug she farts loudly. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and ... Читать далее...
19. Значение идиомы open shop[open shop] {n. phr.} A factory or firm that employs both union andnon-union labor. The firm refuses to adopt an open shop policy. Contrast: CLOSED SHOP....
20. Перевод слова haircutHaircut — стрижка, прическа Перевод слова To have a haircut — постричься a close haircut — короткая стрижка a trendy haircut — модная стрижка I need a Haircut. Мне нужно постричься. John compared his Haircut to his friend’s Джон сравнил свою стрижку со стрижкой друга. Do you like my new Haircut? Тебе нравится моя новая ... Читать далее...
21. One man came to gun shopOne man (lets call him Johnny) came to gun shop. J(ohnny):I want a pistol S(alesman):Choose from this wall (points at wall full of pistols) J: (points at biggest pistol) I want this, S: An.44 Magnum? And for what purpose? J: For shooting cans. S: (points on smaller handgun) For shooting cans is the best this ... Читать далее...
22. Значение идиомы talk shop[talk shop] {v. phr.}, {informal} To talk about things in your workor trade. Two chemists were talking shop, and I hardly understood aword they said....
23. Фразовый глагол shop around — перевод и значение, пример использованияФразовый глагол: shop around Перевод: прицениваться, ходить по магазинам и сравнивать цены, качество, и т. п. Пример: It’s always wise to shop around before buying anything. Всегда целесообразно прицениться перед тем, как что-либо покупать....
24. Steve, Bob and Jeff are working on a very high scaffoldingSteve, Bob and Jeff are working on a very high scaffolding. Suddenly, Steve falls off. He is killed instantaneously. After the ambulance leaves with Steve’s body, Bob and Jeff realize they’ll have to inform his wife. Bob says he’s good at this sort of sensitive stuff, so he volunteers to do the job. After two ... Читать далее...
25. Перевод идиомы talk shop, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: talk shop Перевод: говорить о работе Пример: Everybody at the company gathering decided that they would not talk shop during the dinner. На собрании компании все решили, что во время ужина не будут говорить о работе....
26. Значение идиомы bull in a china shop[bull in a china shop] {n. phr.} A rough or clumsy person who says or does something to anger others or upset plans; a tactless person. We were talking politely and carefully with the teacher about a class party, but John came in like a bull in a china shop and his rough talk made ... Читать далее...
27. Two blondes are passing by a fruit shop whenTwo blondes are passing by a fruit shop when the grocer calls to them, «Bananas! 50 cents each or three for a dollar!» The girls stop and look at each other. «Well I suppose we could always eat the third one!»...
28. Launch the missilesIt’s Friday night and President Bill is working late in the White House. Suddenly the big, red telephone on his desk rings. [President Bill] Hello! Hello! [Voice on the line] President Bill! We have a report that Boris Yeltsin just ordered the launch of all Russian missiles in a full-scale nuclear attack against the United ... Читать далее...
29. Bill and Bob met at the club for their weekly golf gameBill and Bob met at the club for their weekly golf game. And for the third week in a row, it was raining too hard to play. Bill: Well, Bob, what do you want to do now? Bob: Darts? Bill: Nah. Bob: Shoot some pool? Bill: Nah. Bob: Cards? Bill: Nah. Hey, I’ve got an ... Читать далее...
30. A man stops by a diner at noonA man stops by a diner at noon, the busiest time of day, sits down at the counter and asks for a cup of coffee. The waitress, who is very busy, gives him his coffee and rushes off to help the numerous customers having lunch at the diner. The man, who uses both creamer and ... Читать далее...
31. The Shop of Ghosts на английском языке писателя G. K. ChestertonNearly all the best and most precious things in the universe you can get for a halfpenny. I make an exception, of course, of the sun, the moon, the earth, people, stars, thunderstorms, and such trifles. You can get them for nothing. Also I make an exception of another thing, which I am not allowed ... Читать далее...
32. Humor about Irish Pubs(Setting the scene, Ballymun outside of Dublin has a reputation as a rough spot) Fifteen minutes into Aer Lingus Flight EI109 from Madrid to Dublin the Plane encounters a serious problem with the Instrument landing systems. In a Fit of Panic, Paddy the Pilot turns to his co-Pilot and says. «Jazus Mick…Well have to turn ... Читать далее...
33. Магазин/ ShopНа английском языке Перевод на русский язык Shop Магазин Modern cities are full of various shops. There are clothes shops, antique shops, bookstores, beauty shops, pharmacies, gift shops, supermarkets, newspaper stands, stationery shops, etc. When I want to buy food and beverages, I go to the nearest supermarket. There is also one hypermarket not far ... Читать далее...
34. So this guy was out on his front lawn flying a kiteSo this guy was out on his front lawn flying a kite, he was really having a difficult time. The kite was swinging wildly, not exactly what you’d describe as stable, so his wife sticks her head out the door and says, «Gee Ralph, it looks like you need more tail.» Ralph replies «Make up ... Читать далее...
35. PeanutsSitting at home one night with his wife, a man is casually tossing peanuts into the air and catching them in his mouth. As the couple take in the latest episode of their favorite program, the man loses concentration for a split second, and a peanut goes into his ear. He tries to get it ... Читать далее...
36. Значение идиомы shop around for[shop around for] {v. phr.} To make the rounds of variouscommercial establishments in order to find the most economical answerfor one’s needs. We’ve been shopping around for a largercondominium that is affordable, and near the university....
37. Like to screw?It’s the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He’s a pretty hip guy with his own car. When he goes to the front door, the girl’s father answers and invites him in. Carrie’s not ready yet, so why don’t you have a seat?,» he says. «That’s cool» says Bobby. Carrie’s ... Читать далее...
38. A man walked into a gift shop that sold religious itemsA man walked into a gift shop that sold religious items. Near the cash register he saw a display of caps with «WWJD» printed on all of them. He was puzzled over what the letters could mean, but couldn’t figure it out, so he asked the clerk. The clerk replied that the letters stood for ... Читать далее...
39. Fun with telemarketersWhat to say to a telemarketer! One of the things that has always bugged me (and I’m sure it has most of you, too) is to sit down to dinner only to be interrupted by a phone call from a telemarketer. I decided, on one such occasion, to try to be as irritating to them ... Читать далее...
40. Asking About Business HoursStore owner: Hello. Karin: Hello, is this Joe’s Shoe Repair? Store owner: Yes, how can I help you? Karin: I’m calling to find out your Business hours. Store owner: We’re open 24/7. Karin: Really? You’re open 24 hours a day, Seven days a week? Store owner: Yes, we are, More often than not. Of course ... Читать далее...