The barber was finishing a haircut

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1. Barber gives free cuts A barber gave a haircut to a priest one day. The priest tried to pay for the haircut, but the barber refused, saying, “you do God’s work.” The next morning the barber found a dozen bibles at the door to his shop. A policeman came to the barber for a haircut, and again the barber […]...
2. Cronin goes to a barber shop to get his hair cut Cronin goes to a barber shop to get his hair cut. The barber cuts his hair, and after he gets done, as Cronin gets up and is taking out his money, the barber goes over and takes a leak in the corner of the barber shop. The barber finishes and comes back. As Cronin hands […]...
3. Перевод слова barber Barber – мужской парикмахер, цирюльник Перевод слова Barber college – школа парикмахерского дела at the barber’s – в парикмахерской barber’s shop – цирюльня He goes to a Barber downtown. Он ходит к парикмахеру в центре города. The Barber did a real job on my hair. Парикмахер проделал серьезую работу над моими волосами....
4. A cowboy walked into a barber shop A cowboy walked into a barber shop, sat on the barber’s chair and said, “I’ll have a shave and a shoe shine.” The barber began to lather his face while a woman with the biggest, firmest, most beautiful breasts that he had ever seen knelt down and began to shine his shoes. The cowboy said, […]...
5. A man enters a barber shop for a shave A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks. “I have just the thing,” says the barber taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. “Just place this between your cheek and gum.” The […]...
6. The Barber Shop This guy sticks his head into a barber shop and asks, “How long before I can get a haircut?” The barber looks around the shop and says, “About 2 hours.” The guy leaves. A few days later the same guy sticks his head in the door and asks, “How long before I can get a […]...
7. Значение идиомы add the finishing touches [add the finishing touches] {v. phr.} To complete; finish. Mary’s first novel promised to be excellent; however, her editor suggested that she should add some finishing touches before accepting it....
8. Tough job A fellow getting a shave asked the barber if he had another razor. “Why?” asked the barber, “Is there something wrong with this one?” “I don’t know.” replied the customer. “But I would appreciate a chance to defend myself.”...
9. Haircut before a trip A man was getting a haircut prior to a trip to Rome. He mentioned the trip to the barber who responded, “Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It’s crowded & dirty and full of Italians. You’re crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?” “We’re taking TWA,” was the reply. […]...
10. Visit the barber A man and a little boy entered a barbershop together. After the man received the full treatment – shave, shampoo, manicure, haircut, etc. – he placed the boy in the chair. “I’m goin’ to buy a green tie to wear for the parade,” he said. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.” When the boy’s […]...
11. Reward for goodness Three men died in a car accident and met Jesus himself at the Pearly Gates. The Lord spoke unto them saying, “I will ask you each a simple question. If you tell the truth I will allow you into heaven, but if you lie….Hell is waiting for you. To the first man the Lord asked, […]...
12. Two buddies get together and decide to Two buddies get together and decide to go to a whorehouse, one of them tired of doing it with his wife all the time, the other not having it done for a long time. Anyways the married one goes up and comes down and says ” My wife is much better”. “Allright” goes the other […]...
13. Bill Clinton’s haircut Before his infamous haircut on the tarmac, Clinton asked his stylist Christophe, “How long will this take, how much will it cost, and how good will this look?” Christophe replied just ten minutes, cost $20, and look marvelous. An hour and fifteen minutes later, Clinton looked into the mirror in horror and Christophe handed him […]...
14. Bad Bernie was in prison for seven years Bad Bernie was in prison for seven years. The day he got out, his wife and son were there to pick him up. He came through the gates and got into the car. The only thing he said was, “F. F.” His wife turned to him and answered, “E. F.” Out on the highway, he […]...
15. Значение идиомы about one’s ears [about one’s ears] or [around one’s ears] {adv. phr.} To or into complete collapse, defeat, or ruin; to the destruction of a person’s plans, hopes, or happiness. They planned to have factories all over the world but the war brought their plans down about their ears. John hoped to go to college and become a […]...
16. Значение идиомы ear [ear] See: ABOUT ONE’S EARS or AROUND ONE’S EARS, BELIEVE ONE’SEARS, DRY BEHIND THE EARS, FLEA IN ONE’S EAR, GIVE AN EAR TO or LENDAN EAR TO, GO IN ONE EAR AND OUT THE OTHER, JUG-EARED, LITTLE PITCHERSHAVE BIG EARS, MUSIC TO ONE’S EARS, PIN ONE’S EARS BACK, PLAY BY EAR, PRICK UP ONE’S EARS, […]...
17. Traditions A man and a woman got married, and he told her : ” since you are my wife you should respect my traditions and habits…and i have 3 traditions. So, first tradition: On wednesdays i play football with my friends…no matter what..whether it snows or it rains…i dont care..i play football!! -Is it clear for […]...
18. Перевод сленгового выражения crap, значение и пример использования Сленговое выражение: crap Сленговое выражение: crap груб. Перевод: 1. чепуха, ерунда, вранье; 2. восклицание-ругательство (возможные переводы: “Черт!”, “Блин!”, и т. п.); 3. сходить в туалет по-большому; 4. экскрименты, испражнения Синоним: shit Пример: What he said is crap. Don’t believe a word of it. То, что он сказал, это полная чушь. Не верь ни единому его […]...
19. As US tourists in Israel As US tourists in Israel, a man and his wife were sitting outside a Bethlehem souvenir shop, waiting for fellow tourists. An Arab salesman approached them carrying belts. After an impassioned sales talk yielded no results, he asked where they were from. “America,” the husband replied. Looking at her dark hair and olive skin, the […]...
20. There was a boy who worked in the produce section of the market There was a boy who worked in the produce section of the market. One day, a man came in and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce, but the man replied that he did not need a whole head, but only a […]...
21. A man says to his wife A man says to his wife, “Get ready you, me & the dog are going fishing.” Wife says, “I dont want to go.” Man gives her 3 choices, fishing, blow job or take it up the a*se. Wife pick blow job. After she sucking for a while she says, “It tastes like sh*t. Man says, […]...
22. Значение идиомы dry behind the ears [dry behind the ears] {adj. phr.}, {informal} Experienced; knowing how to do something. Usually used in the negative. John had just started working for the company, and was not dry behind the ears yet. Compare: KNOW ONE’S WAY AROUND. Contrast: WET BEHIND THE EARS....
23. Значение идиомы all ears [all ears] {adj. phr.}, {informal} Very eager to hear; very attentive. – Used in the predicate. Go ahead with your story; we are all ears. When John told about the circus, the boys were all ears....
24. Getting a Haircut I have an appointment with my Hairdresser today. It has been too long since I had my hair cut. My Bangs were too long, I had Split ends And my Roots were showing. I was a mess! I arrived for my appointment and I told the Receptionist that I was there for an appointment with […]...
25. Getting a Men’s Haircut It’s been almost three months since I got a haircut and I went to the Barbershop where I always get it cut. But when I got there, the barbershop had been replaced by a Hair salon. Shinobu: Hi, I used to get my hair cut at the barbershop that was here. Nicole: Yeah, they closed. […]...
26. Problems from the start John got off the elevator on the 50th floor and nervously knocked on his blind date’s door. She opened it and was as beautiful and charming as everyone had said. “I’ll be ready in a few minutes,” she said. “Why don’t you play with Spot, my dog, while you’re waiting?” He does wonderful tricks. He […]...
27. A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, “When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?” The husband replied, “All I wanted to do […]...
28. A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu. “I’m sorry sir, but I am blind, and can’t read the menu. Just bring me a dirty fork from a previous customer, I’ll smell it and order […]...
29. A man was taking his wife A man was taking his wife, who was pregnant with twins, to the hospital when his car went out of control and crashed. Upon regaining consciousness, he saw his brother, a relentless world-class practical joker, sitting at his bed side. He asked his brother how his wife was and his brother replied, “Don’t worry, everybody […]...
30. Значение идиомы cry before one is hurt [cry before one is hurt] or [holler before one is hurt] {v. phr.}, {informal} To complain when there is no reason for it; become upset because you are worried or afraid. – Used in negative sentences. When Billy went to the barber, he began to cry before the barber cut his hair and his father […]...
31. Перевод слова haircut Haircut – стрижка, прическа Перевод слова To have a haircut – постричься a close haircut – короткая стрижка a trendy haircut – модная стрижка I need a Haircut. Мне нужно постричься. John compared his Haircut to his friend’s Джон сравнил свою стрижку со стрижкой друга. Do you like my new Haircut? Тебе нравится моя новая […]...
32. Three guys were sitting in a bar talking Three guys were sitting in a bar talking. One was a Doctor, one was a Lawyer, and one was a Biker. After a sip of his martini, the doctor said; “You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I got my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedez. I figure that if she doesn’t like the […]...
33. They are stopped by the police John & Jessica were on their way home from the bar one night and John got pulled over by the police. The officer told John that he was stopped because his tail light was burned out. John said, “I’m very sorry officer, I didn’t realize it was out, I’ll get it fixed right away.” Just […]...
34. A veterinarian surgeon A veterinarian surgeon had had a hell of a day, but when he got home from tending to all the sick animals his wife was waiting with a long cool drink and a romantic candle-lit dinner, after which they had a few more drinks and went happily to bed. At about 2:00 in the morning, […]...
35. Play doctor Steve complained to his friend Al that lovemaking with his wife was becoming routine and boring. “Get creative buddy. Break up the monotony. Why don’t you try playing doctor for an hour?” “Sounds great,” Steve replied, “but how do you make it last for an hour?” “Hell, just keep her in the waiting room for […]...
36. Перевод слова customer Customer – покупатель, клиент Перевод слова Customer service – служба работы с покупателями at customer’s discretion – на усмотрение заказчика potential customer – потенциальный клиент She is one of our best Customers. Она является одним из наших лучших клиентов. Poor Customer service has ruined the company’s reputation. Плохое обслуживание клиентов погубило репутацию компании. The Customer […]...
37. ‘Twas the Night After Christmas ‘Twas the night after Christmas and all through the trailer, the beer had gone flat and the pizza was staler. The tube socks hung empty, no candies or toys and I was camped out on my old Lay-Z-Boy. The kids they weren’t talking to me or my wife, the worst Christmas they said they had […]...
38. Tell about a haircut The story of someone getting a haircut. Women’s version: Woman2: Oh! You got a haircut! That’s so cute! Woman1: Do you think so? I wasn’t sure when she gave me the mirror. I mean, you don’t think it’s too fluffy looking? Woman2: Oh God no! No, it’s perfect. I’d love to get my hair cut […]...
39. When Joe’s wife ran away with his car, his money and When Joe’s wife ran away with his car, his money and his best friend, he got so depressed that his doctor sent him to see a psychiatrist. Joe told the psychiatrist his troubles and said, “Life isn’t worth living. I think I’m gonna top myself.” “Don’t be stupid, Joe,” said the psychiatrist. “My wife ran […]...
40. The guide to wife translations The wife says: You want The wife means: You want The wife says: We need The wife means: I want The wife says: It’s your decision The wife means: The correct decision should be obvious The wife says: Do what you want The wife means: You’ll pay for this later The wife says: We need […]...