The bank manager was in the final stages of hiring

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1. A man goes to his bank manager and says A man goes to his bank manager and says “I’d like to start a small business how do I go about it?” The bank manager leans back and clasps his hands together on his gut and replies “Buy a big one and wait”...
2. Перевод слова final Final – завершающий, заключительный, конечный Перевод слова The final day of the term – последний день занятий the final chapter – заключительная глава this battle was final – эта битва оказалась решающей is that final? – это окончательно? He coasted through his Final exams. Он без труда сдал выпускные экзамены. You need to tackle the […]...
3. A Manager of a retail clothing store is reviewing A Manager of a retail clothing store is reviewing a potential employee’s application and notices that the man has never worked in retail before. He says to the man, “For a man with no experience, you are certainly asking for a high wage.” “Well Sir,” the applicant replies, “the work is so much harder when […]...
4. Перевод слова manager Manager – управляющий, руководитель, менеджер Перевод слова Manager of distribution – менеджер отдела сбыта branch manager – заведующий отделением, заведующий филиалом campaign manager – руководитель избирательной кампании He was appointed Manager. Его назначили управляющим. He will make a good Manager. Он станет хорошим управляющим. I demand to see the Manager. Я хочу видеть менеджера. Происхождение […]...
5. A manager of a restaurant had called its owner A manager of a restaurant had called its owner to ask about whether or not she should hire a new waitress. “She can speak twelve different languages, which will be good for foreign visitors,” said the manager. “All right, so hire her,” the owner replied.”But, sir…” “I knew there would be a but. What’s wrong […]...
6. Taking the final exam Two college basketball players were taking an important final exam. If they failed, they would be on academic probation and not allowed to play in the big game the following week. The exam was fill-in-the-blank. The last question read, “Old MacDonald had a ________.” Bubba was stumped. He had no idea what to answer. But […]...
7. Bank Teller Bank Teller A middle aged man walks into the bank and says to the young teller, “I want to open a fucking checking account”. “Please sir”, she replies, “we can’t have language like that in here.” “Why the Fuck not?” he asked. “Sir,” Came her retort, “I must ask you to refrain from swearing.” “I […]...
8. Students miss a final Introductory Chemistry was taught at Duke University for many years by professor Bonk. One year, two guys took the class and did pretty well on all the quizzes and mid-terms – so much so that going into the final, they each had a solid A. These two friends were so confident going into the final […]...
9. Final wish In a tiny village on the Irish coast lived an old lady, a virgin and very proud of it. Sensing that her final days were rapidly approaching, and desiring to make sure everything was in proper order when she dies, he went to the town’s undertaker (who also happened to be the local postal clerk) […]...
10. Перевод слова application Application – просьба, заявление Перевод слова Written application – письменное заявление to send in an application – подать заявление to withdraw an application – забирать прошение Please fill out this Application. Пожалуйста, заполните данное приложение. My Application was lost in the post. Мое заявление было потеряно на почте. He sent in his job Application late. […]...
11. A middle manager is called into his bosses office A middle manager is called into his bosses office on a Monday morning. He is told he has to get rid of one employee in his department by the next Monday. “Downsizing.” He’s really upset. Everyone in his department does a good job and it doesn’t seem fair. So for the next 2 days he […]...
12. Johnny missed his final exam due to the flu Johnny missed his final exam due to the flu, but he’d done so well during the year that the teacher suggests to the principal they give him an oral exam to make up for the test he’d missed. The principal agrees so they called Johnny into the office and explain about the oral test. First […]...
13. Перевод слова precise Precise – точный, определенный, тщательный Перевод слова Precise measurements – точные размеры precise diagnosis – точный диагноз just at that precise moment – именно в тот момент precise information – достоверная информация He is very Precise about dates and facts. Он всегда очень точен в датах и фактах. He was very Precise about doing his […]...
14. Talking to a Bank Teller Bank Teller: Can I help you? Antonio: Yes, I’d like To deposit this Check. Bank Teller: Please fill out a Deposit slip and be sure To endorse the check on the back. Antonio: Here you are. I’ve already filled out a slip and signed the check. I’d also like To cash this other check. Bank […]...
15. Hiring an accountant Kowalski, fresh out of accounting school, went to a interview for a good paying job. The company boss asked various questions about him and his education, but then asked him, “What is three times seven?” “Twenty-two,” Kowalski replied. After he left, he double-checked it on his calculator (he knew he should have taken it to […]...
16. Life Science Final Exam The not necessarily well-prepared student sat in his life science classroom staring at a question on the final exam paper. The question directed: “Give four advantages of breast milk.” What to write? He sighed, and began to scribble whatever came into his head, hoping for the best: 1. No need to boil. 2. Cats can’t […]...
17. The Big Horse Race Horses in the race are: 1. Passionate Lady 2. Bare Belly 3. Silk Panties 4. Conscience 5. Jockey Shorts 6. Clean Sheets 7. Thighs 8. Big Johnson 9. Heavy Bosum 10. Merry Cherry At the Post: They’re off! Conscience is left behind at the post. Jockey Shorts and Silk Panties are off in a hurry. […]...
18. The manager of a large city zoo was drafting a letter to order The manager of a large city zoo was drafting a letter to order a pair of animals. He sat at his computer and typed the following sentence: “I would like to place an order for two mongooses, to be delivered at your earliest convenience.” He stared at the screen, focusing on that odd word mongooses. […]...
19. Фразовый глагол fill in (1) – перевод и значение, пример использования Фразовый глагол: fill in (1) Перевод: заполнять Пример: Don’t forget to fill in all the blanks on the application. Не забудь заполнить все бланки приложения....
20. Моя будущая профессия – менеджер/ My Future Profession Is A Manager На английском языке Перевод на русский язык My Future Profession Is A Manager Моя будущая профессия – менеджер As the school comes to an end, we need to think about our future career. There are certainly many interesting and worthy professions in the modern world, but I think that people should choose what’s best for […]...
21. Getting a Marriage License Yves: Help me fill out this Application for our Marriage license. Vanessa: Can’t you do it? I’m really busy with work right now. Do as much as you can and just ask me if you don’t know something. Yves: Okay, I’ll try, but I’m reading through the requirements, and it’s a good idea for both […]...
22. Mr. Jones had hired a new secretary Mr. Jones had hired a new secretary. She was young, sweet and very polite. While taking dictation one morning, she noticed that his fly was open. Upon leaving the room she said, “Mr. Jones, your barracks door is open.” He was puzzled by her remark, but later that day he noticed that his zipper was […]...
23. A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep out the store.” “But I’m a college graduate.” the young man replied indignantly. “Oh, I’m sorry. I […]...
24. Перевод идиомы the last straw / the final straw, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: the last straw / the final straw Перевод: последняя капля Пример: The fourth time that the girl came to work late was the last straw and we finally fired her. Четвертый раз, когда девушка опоздала на работу, был последней каплей, и мы наконец ее уволили....
25. Hiring a Hitman Gus: Are you Shirley? Shirley: Yeah, thanks for agreeing to meet me here. I’m told you’re the best Sniper in the business and you can be Discreet. I need a Hitman who can do a job, then Make himself scarce. Gus: I’m your man. Tell me about it. Shirley: There’s someone who’s been A thorn […]...
26. Значение идиомы fill in [fill in] {v.} 1. To write words needed in blanks; put in; fill. You should fill in all the blanks on an application for a job. 2.{informal} To tell what you should know. The new boy didn’t knowthe rules so Bob filled him in. The teacher filled in Mary aboutclass work done while she was […]...
27. A man lay sprawled across three entire seats A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theater. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, “Sorry, sir, but you’re only allowed one seat.” The man groaned but didn’t budge. The usher became impatient. “Sir, if you don’t get up from there I’m going to have […]...
28. Remember a child A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally he went to the checkout line, but she got in front of him. “Pardon me,” she said, “I’m sorry if my […]...
29. Hiring for a Job Last week, My administrative assistant gave notice that he was quitting in two weeks. It couldn’t have come at a worse time. It was a very busy time of the year, but there was nothing I could do. Right away, we put a Want ad in the Classifieds and received several applications for the job. […]...
30. A customer sent an order to a distributor A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount of goods totaling a great deal of money. The distributor noticed that the previous bill hadn’t been paid. The collections manager left a voice-mail for them saying, “We can’t ship your new order until you pay for the last one.” The next day […]...
31. There was a boy who worked in the produce section of the market There was a boy who worked in the produce section of the market. One day, a man came in and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce, but the man replied that he did not need a whole head, but only a […]...
32. Matt Damon, Ben Affleck paid for auditions from joint bank account “When I look back at that, a 16 and 14 year old, we were really young to be taking the bus by ourselves to New York and spending a day going to an audition – we were living adult lives as teenagers,” Damon said. Matt Damon has revealed that he shared a bank account with […]...
33. Opening a Bank Account I decided to Switch banks recently, and after looking at my options, I Went for Mar Vista National Bank. I Drove over to the bank, parked next to the Drive-through teller lanes, and walked inside. I made my way to the new Accounts desk, and was greeted by John, one of the customer service representatives […]...
34. Applying for Unemployment Benefits Agency Employee: Hello, state Unemployment agency. George: Hello, I’d like to apply for Unemployment benefits. Agency Employee: Okay, give me your address and I’ll send you an application. George: How much can I get? Agency Employee: That depends. Your benefits are Calculated based on your Quarterly earnings. You were Laid off from your job? George: […]...
35. Equally qualified Young man Murphy applied for an engineering position at an Irish firm based in Dublin. An American applied for the same job and both applicants having the same qualifications were asked to take a test by the Department manager. Upon completion of the test both men only missed one of the questions. The manager went […]...
36. Значение идиомы fill out [fill out] {v.} 1. To put in what is missing; complete; finish;{especially}, to complete by writing the missing facts in the blank spaces; to write down factswhich are asked for in After Tom passedhis driving test he filled out an application for his driver’slicense. The policeman filled out a report of the accident. 2. Tobecome […]...
37. Getting Rid of Bugs and Rodents Apartment Manager: This is the one-bedroom apartment we have for rent. Let me show you around. Sherin: Wait! Did you see that? It looked like a Mouse or a Rat. Apartment Manager: There aren’t any Rodents or any other Vermin in this Apartment complex. I make sure of that. Sherin: Are you sure? Apartment Manager: […]...
38. Beware of dog! Upon entering the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG! posted on the glass door. Inside he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor beside the cash register. He asked the store manager, “Is THAT the dog folks are supposed to beware of?” “Yep, that’s him,” […]...
39. Where are you from The cowboy lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh Amarillo theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this he whispered to the cowboy, “Sorry, sir, but you’re only allowed one seat.” The cowboy groaned but didn’t budge. The usher became more impatient. “Sir, if you don’t get up from there, I’m going […]...
40. Значение идиомы girl Friday [girl Friday] {n.} A very dependable and helpful female officeworker; especially a secretary. Miss Johnson is the manager’s girlFriday. There was an advertisement in the newspaper for a girlFriday....