Honeymoon II

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1. On their honeymoon nightOn their honeymoon night, the burly groom took off his pants and asked his bride to put them on. The waist alone was twice her body. She said, «I can’t wear your pants.» «That’s right,» intoned the groom, «And don’t you forget it. I’m the one who wears the pants in the family.» The bride ... Читать далее...
2. Really torrid honeymoonAfter the third day of a really torrid honeymoon, the young couple finally emerged from their room and walked into the hotel restaurant. After they were seated, the waiter came over to get their orders. The new husband looked at his bride and said, «You know what I really feel like honey?» «Well sure,» she ... Читать далее...
3. Перевод слова honeymoonHoneymoon — медовый месяц Перевод слова To be on honeymoon — проводить медовый месяц to go for a honeymoon — поехать в свадебное путешествие honeymoon couple — молодожены, совершающие свадебное путешествие The neoteric fashion of spending a Honeymoon on the railway. Новая мода проводить медовый месяц в путешествии по железной дороге. They plan to Honeymoon ... Читать далее...
4. Значение идиомы honeymoon is over[honeymoon is over] The first happy period of friendship andcooperation between two persons or groups is over. A few monthsafter a new President is elected, the honeymoon is over and Congressand the President begin to criticize each other. The honeymoon wassoon over for the new foreman and the men under him....
5. A couple on their honeymoon woke up after their big nightA couple on their honeymoon woke up after their big night. The bride rolled over and said, «That was nice but tell me, what did my pussy look like before you rooted it?» The husband replied «Like a beautiful rose with drops of dew on it.» «That’s nice honey» she replied, «What did it look ... Читать далее...
6. It is all in the moneyA couple was having a discussion about what to see and do now that they were safely in Florida on their honeymoon. Trying to assert himself rite off the bat, he exploded, «If it weren’t for my money, we wouldn’t be here at all!» The wife replied, «My dear, if it weren’t for your money, ... Читать далее...
7. RepetitivenessAfter the lavish wedding reception, the newlyweds retired to their Honeymoon Suite. The groom turned down the lights and found some nice CDs to stack on the player. Then he excused himself and returned in pajamas and robe. He opened a bottle of champagne and poured them each a drink, unaware that his new bride ... Читать далее...
8. An old man and old woman got married and went on their honeymoonAn old man and old woman got married and went on their honeymoon. They were in bed getting ready to have sex for the first time and the old woman said I should tell you I have acute angina The old man says I hope so, you sure don’t have cute tits....
9. Some explainingThe newlyweds arrived at the front desk of the posh ocean-side resort in Hilton Head, South Carolina, looking all fresh, and eager to enjoy their two week vacation/honeymoon. The stunning blonde at the front desk smiled and said, «Well, hi Jimmy, how ya been lover? Long time no see.» A frosty silence prevailed until the ... Читать далее...
10. Перевод слова brideBride — невеста Перевод слова To take a bride — выбрать невесту portionless bride — невеста без приданого yearling bride — год как замужем I give you the Bride and groom! Я предлагаю выпить за жениха и невесту! He and his Bride boarded the train. Он со своей невестой сел в поезд. The Bride and ... Читать далее...
11. A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversaryA man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, «When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?» The husband replied, «All I wanted to do ... Читать далее...
12. One day, a young cowboy and a cowgirl decidedOne day, a young cowboy and a cowgirl decided to get married. He was a man of the world and she was an innocent bride with no experience. On the first night of their honeymoon the couple washed up and started to get ready for bed. When they get into bed, they start exploring each ... Читать далее...
13. That is ONE!A middle aged rancher in pioneer days of old, had growen tired of working so hard to build a beautiful ranch house and huge herd to go with it. So he thought it would be nice to get one of those mail order brides. Well he sent for one and on the day she was ... Читать далее...
14. This snow plow driver from North DakotaThis snow plow driver from North Dakota got married. He and his new Bride prepared for their wedding nite. He watched for a while as she spread three different kinds of creams and then a white foam in preparation for their love making. She finally announced that she was ready. The man then asked if ... Читать далее...
15. Two newlyweds are riding in the back of a limoTwo newlyweds are riding in the back of a limo on the way to their honeymoon boat cruise. The husband says, «Honey, I want to stop and pick up some condoms before we go.» «Good idea,» she says. «While you’re in there, pick me up some Dramamine.» The groom gets out, walks into the drugstore ... Читать далее...
16. Commuting by TrainLisa: Can you tell me if this is the right Platform for the Train to Arlington? Omar: Yes, it is. Is this your first time taking the train? Lisa: Is it that Obvious? Omar: No, you just look a little lost. Lisa: I’m starting a new job and I have To commute to work for ... Читать далее...
17. Перевод слова vehicleVehicle — транспортное средство Перевод слова An overage vehicle — устаревшее транспортное средство private vehicle — частный, личный автомобиль five-passenger vehicle — пятиместное транспортное средство Do I need to take out insurance on my Vehicle? Нужно ли мне приобретать страховку на мой автомобиль? Their Vehicle was crushed by an army tank. Их машину раздавил боевой ... Читать далее...
18. Перевод слова upperUpper — верхний, высший Перевод слова Upper berth — верхняя полка variable with upper bound — переменная с верхним пределом upper middle class — верхушка среднего класса He broke his Upper jaw. Он сломал верхнюю челюсть. Who will sleep on the Upper berth? Кто будет спать на верхней полке? The hotel is on the Upper ... Читать далее...
19. Two Polish guys are discussing one’s upcoming weddingTwo Polish guys are discussing one’s upcoming wedding… «I’m not sure if my future bride is a virgin or not.» His buddy replies, «Oh, there’s an easy test for that. All you need is some red paint, some blue paint and a shovel. You paint one ball red and one ball blue. On your honeymoon, ... Читать далее...
20. Jake is 85, and he gets married to a 16-year-oldJake is 85, and he gets married to a 16-year-old. He walks into the local bar when he gets back from his honeymoon, and all the guys want to hear about his wedding night. Jake says, «Well, when we got to the hotel, my youngest son carried me up the stairs, undressed me, and lifted ... Читать далее...
21. Childhood DiseasesChildhood Diseases Two newlyweds went on their honeymoon and were getting undressed together for the first time. He took off his shoes and socks and his toes were all twisted and discolored. «What happened to you feet?» his wife asked. «I had a childhood disease called tolio.» «Don’t you mean polio?» «No, tolio, it only ... Читать далее...
22. A young couple got married, and in their familyA young couple got married, and in their family, it was tradition that the best man dance with the bride for the first song. Well, this happened…but then they danced for the second song too. And the third. By the time the fourth song came on, the groom ran up and kicked the bride between ... Читать далее...
23. Значение идиомы upper story[upper story] {n.} 1. A floor or level of a building above thefirst floor. The apartment house where Gene lives is five storieshigh and he lives in one of the upper stories. 2. {slang} A person’shead or brain. Lulu has nobody home in the upper story. Bill’ssister says he is weak in the upper story....
24. Wedding preparation guidelinesAnnouncement: It is the responsibility of the bride’s family to announce the wedding in the local newspaper. The announcement should include: A photograph of the bride (A high school yearbook picture is acceptable); Name of the groom, education completed by both bride and groom (do not include elementary school, unless that was the terminal degree.); ... Читать далее...
25. A 70-year-old man has never been marriedA 70-year-old man has never been married. One day he meets a beautiful 17-year-old girl, and it is love at first sight. They get married and go to Florida for their honeymoon. When they get back, his friend says to him, «So, tell me, how was it?» «Oh, it was beautiful,» says the man. «The ... Читать далее...
26. Значение идиомы keep a stiff upper lip[keep a stiff upper lip] {v. phr.} To be brave; face troublebravely. He was very much worried about his sick daughter, but hekept a stiff upper lip. Although he was having some trouble withthe engine, the pilot kept a stiff upper lip and landed the planesafely. Compare: KEEP ONE’S CHIN UP....
27. The wedding is offno on!All the farmers for a hundred miles around were attending the wedding of a young Australian couple. Waiting for things to get started, they were somewhat shocked to see the bride’s father storm up the aisle, jacket off, sleeves rolled up, and obviously very angry. «The weddin’s off,» he shouted, «Everybody bugger off!» Dismayed and ... Читать далее...
28. Перевод слова trainTrain — поезд, состав; воспитывать, учить Перевод слова Fast train — скорый поезд express train — экспресс to train a child — воспитывать ребенка to train as a typist — учиться на машинистку Is this dog Trained? Эта собака дрессирована? I saw the in Train. Я увидел прибывающий поезд. She missed her Train. Она опоздала ... Читать далее...
29. A middle aged man and woman fall in love, and decide to get marriedA middle aged man and woman fall in love, and decide to get married. On their wedding night they settle into the bridal suite and the bride says to her new groom, «Please be gentle… I am still a virgin.» The startled groom says «How can that be? You’ve been married twice…» The bride responds… ... Читать далее...
30. Learning to Ride the SubwayDonny: Come on, we need to buy our Subway tickets at that Ticket machine. Cayla: Why can’t we just get them at the Ticket window? I’m not sure what the Fare is. Donny: There’s a long line and we need to catch a Train right now. Cayla: I’ve never taken the subway before. I don’t ... Читать далее...
31. Перевод слова settleSettle — урегулировать, принимать решение, договариваться; поселиться, обосноваться Перевод слова That settles the matter — это решает вопрос the terms were settled — об условиях договорились to settle in London — поселиться в Лондоне Nothing’s Settled yet. Еще ничего не решено. Two birds Settled on the fence. Две птицы уселись на заборе. It was our ... Читать далее...
32. A guy out on the golf course takes a high speed ball rightA guy out on the golf course takes a high speed ball right in the crotch. Writhing in agony, he falls to the ground. He finally gets himself to the doctor. He says, «How bad is it doc? I’m going on my honeymoon next week and my fiance is still a virgin in every way.» ... Читать далее...
33. A young couple gets married, and the groomA young couple gets married, and the groom asks his bride if he can have a dresser drawer of his own that she will never open. The bride agrees. After 30 years of marriage, she notices that his drawer has been left ajar. She peeks in and sees 3 golf balls and $6,000. She confronts ... Читать далее...
34. Traveling by TrainKaterina: Hey, Joel. Have you ever traveled by train? Joel: Only once, and that was a long time ago when I lived in Orlando. I’m not even sure where the Train station is in this city. Why do you ask? Katerina: I need to go to San Francisco at the end of May for a ... Читать далее...
35. Brand newA guy out on the golf course takes a high speed ball right in the crotch. Writhing in agony, he falls to the ground. He finally gets himself to the doctor. He says, «How bad is it doc? I’m going on my honeymoon next week and my fiancee is still a virgin.» The doc said, ... Читать далее...
36. Simple CuriosityMy wife and I were watching some TV show the other nite where the wife hired a private detective to follow her husband and see if he were in fact «cheating» on her. I asked my wife if she would ever do that. She said, «Well not so much to find out who the other ... Читать далее...
37. Day care workers charged with running toddler’Fight Club’Two employees of a New Jersey day care center instigated «Fight Club»-style brawls between the toddlers and shared footage of the pint-sized pugilists on Snapchat, prosecutors said Tuesday. Erica Kenny, 22, and Chanese White, 28, were criminally charged for allegedly staging tussles between kids ages 4 to 6 at Lightbridge Academy, in Cranford. «Approximately a ... Читать далее...
38. Значение идиомы upper crust[upper crust] {n.}, {informal} The richest, most famous, orimportant people in a certain place; the highest class. It is aschool that only the children of the upper crust can afford....
39. The train has failedA large two engined train was crossing America. After they had gone some distance one of the engines broke down. «No problem,» the engineer thought, and carried on at half power. Farther on down the line, the other engine broke down, and the train came to a standstill. The engineer decided he should inform the ... Читать далее...
40. Foreign Currency Exchange RatesSydney: Where should we go on our Honeymoon? I thought Rome would be nice. Isaac: Let me check. No, that wouldn’t be a good idea. Sydney: Okay, how about Tokyo? I’ve always wanted to visit Japan. Isaac: No, I’m afraid not. Sydney: How are you making these Determinations? Isaac: I’m checking to see if the ... Читать далее...