Excuse TO smoke

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1. Перевод слова gaze Gaze – вглядываться, уставиться; взгляд Перевод слова To gaze intently – пристально смотреть admiring gaze – восхищенный взгляд to gaze devouringly at smth. – с жадностью смотреть на что-л. She gave me an innocent Gaze. Она простодушно взглянула на меня. He Gazed on Niagara Falls like entranced. Он как зачарованный смотрел на Ниагарский водопад. She […]...
2. Little Mermaid Three fellows walking along the beach noticed a mermaid sitting on a rock swishing her tail in the foam. The first man waded out to her and said, Hello mermaid! Have you ever been kissed?” She replied, “no sir!” So he kissed her quite thoroughly and asked, “Did you like that?” “Oh, indeed I did, […]...
3. Criminal steals lumber A man with a nagging secret couldn’t keep it any longer. In the confessional he admitted that for years he had been stealing building supplies from the lumberyard where he worked. “What did you take?” his priest asked. “Enough to build my own house and enough for my son’s house. And houses for our two […]...
4. The Fisherman One day a fisherman was lying on a beautiful beach, with his fishing pole propped up in the sand and his solitary line cast out into the sparkling blue surf. He was enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun and the prospect of catching a fish. About that time, a businessman came walking down the […]...
5. Перевод слова quit Quit – бросать, освобождаться Перевод слова To quit oneself of fear – избавиться от страха to quit the house – съехать с квартиры, переехать в другое место to quit work when the siren sounds – прекращать работу по сигналу сирены to quit a debt – выплатить долг I Quit school at 16. Я бросил школу […]...
6. Пословица / поговорка where there’s smoke there’s fire / no smoke without fire – перевод и значение, пример использования Пословица / поговорка: where there’s smoke there’s fire / no smoke without fire Перевод: нет дыма без огня; дыма без огня не бывает Пример: Where there’s smoke there’s fire and the discussion of the safety problem suggested that the company should try to do something about it. Дыма без огня не бывает, и обсуждение вопроса […]...
7. The definition of a phallic symbol This girl walks in to a doctors office and she asks “Whats a failic symbol? Doctor says “you’re kidding..” Girl says “no! I don’t know! Whats a failic symbol???” Doctor pulls his pants and underwear down and says “You see? This is a failic symbol!” Girl says “Oh! Its just like a penis, only smaller”...
8. Перевод слова cigarette Cigarette – сигарета, папироса Перевод слова To puff on a cigarette – дымить сигаретой to smoke a cigarette – выкурить сигарету cigarette end – окурок Can you spare me a Cigarette? Не найдется ли у вас сигаретки? Can I cop a Cigarette from you? Закурить не найдется? He stopped to light a Cigarette. Он остановился, […]...
9. Reward for goodness Three men died in a car accident and met Jesus himself at the Pearly Gates. The Lord spoke unto them saying, “I will ask you each a simple question. If you tell the truth I will allow you into heaven, but if you lie….Hell is waiting for you. To the first man the Lord asked, […]...
10. I have a question A father and son went fishing one day. While they were out in the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him. He asked his father, “How does this boat float? The father replied, “Don’t rightly know son.” A little later, the boy looked at his father and asked, “How do fish […]...
11. Перевод слова growth Growth – развитие, рост, распространение Перевод слова To attain full growth – достичь полного развития, зрелости economic growth – экономическое развитие the growth of education – распространение образования The goal is zero population Growth. Целью является нулевой рост населения. Warm weather encourages plant Growth. Теплая погода способствует росту растений. Caterpillars go through several stages of […]...
12. This fellow comes to confession This fellow comes to confession. “Father, he said, forgive me for I have sinned.” The priest asked, “What did you do, my son?” “I lusted,” the fellow replied. “Tell me about it,” the priest said. The fellow then related his story. “Father, I am a deliveryman for UPS. Yesterday I was making a delivery in […]...
13. Another ethnic joke A man of Polish ancestry walked up to the counter and asked for a Polish Meatball Sandwich. The man at the counter said, “What a Pollack.” The Polish man said, “I resent that. If a Jew came to your counter and asked for a kosher salami on rye, would you call him a stupid Jew.” […]...
14. Clinton died and was standing at hte Pearly Gates Clinton died and was standing at hte Pearly Gates. After knocking at the gates, St. Peter appeared. “Who goes there?” inquired St. Peter. “‘It’s me, Bill Clinton.” “And what do you want?” asked St. Peter. “Lemme in!” replied Clinton. “Soooo,” pondered Peter. “What bad things did you do on earth?” Clinton thought a bit and […]...
15. There was a little old man who had a bit of a speech impediment There was a little old man who had a bit of a speech impediment. One day he went shopping, his first stop was at a hardware store. He went up to the shop assistant and asked “Could I have a fucket please?” The assistant asked”Pardon sir?”. “Can I have a fucket please?” Replied the man. […]...
16. A man went to the doctor for a check up A man went to the doctor for a check up. “How do you feel?” asked the doctor. “Fine.” he replied. After a few more general health questions the doctor asked, “How many times do you have sex per month?” “About two or three.” the man replied. “You should be doing better than that.” the doctor […]...
17. Excuse me [ excuse ] 952 1) [Ik’skjHs] n – извинение; 2) [Ik’skjHz] V– извинять Excuse me. (разговорное – ‘Scuse me. [skjHz]) Извините., Простите. (за небольшую оплошность, за неудобства, за то, что перебиваю вас и т. п.). “Excuse me, but would you know what time it is?” – Willis looked at his watch. “Three-ten,” he said. – […]...
18. Cop wants an excuse A man was driving home late one afternoon, and he was driving above the speed limit. He notices a police car with its red lights on in his rear view mirror. He thinks “I can outrun this guy,” so he floors it and the race is on. The cars are racing down the highway – […]...
19. Finding a Chinese Jew Sid and Al were sitting in a Chinese restaurant. “Sid,” asked Al, “are there any Jews in China?” “I don’t know,” Sid replied. “Why don’t we ask the waiter?” When the waiter came by, Al asked him, “Are there any Chinese Jews?” “I don’t know sir, let me ask,” the waiter replied, and he went […]...
20. A young peasant girl of fourteen A young peasant girl of fourteen went to work in a broom factory. After 2 months she gave the boss a two-week notice. The boss was quite unhappy to let her go since she was hard working, knew her tasks etc. He called her into his office, “But why?” he asked. “Nothin, I just wanna […]...
21. The Director of the Scottish Tartans Museum The Director of the Scottish Tartans Museum, Dr Michael MacDonald was in America. An old lady fixed her gaze on his 17th Century sporran and asked, “What, exactly, do you keep in your scrotum?”...
22. As US tourists in Israel As US tourists in Israel, a man and his wife were sitting outside a Bethlehem souvenir shop, waiting for fellow tourists. An Arab salesman approached them carrying belts. After an impassioned sales talk yielded no results, he asked where they were from. “America,” the husband replied. Looking at her dark hair and olive skin, the […]...
23. Late one night, little Johnny woke up to the some loud noises Late one night, little Johnny woke up to the some loud noises coming from his parents’ bedroom. He got out of bed and walked down the hall towards his parents room. Before he made it to the end of the hall, the noises had ceased and the bathroom light had gone on. Little Johnny walked […]...
24. Last minute requests A man woke up in a hospital bed and called for his doctor. He asked, “Give it to me straight. How long have I got?” The physician replied that he doubted that the man would survive the night. The man then said, “Call for my lawyer.” When the lawyer arrived, the man asked for his […]...
25. One fall day Dave was out raking leaves when he noticed One fall day Dave was out raking leaves when he noticed a hearse slowly drive by. Following the first hearse was a second hearse, which was followed by a man walking solemnly along, followed by a dog, and then about 200 men walking in single file. Intrigued, Dave went up to the man following the […]...
26. There was an airplane full of a shipment of Pepsi flying over Africa There was an airplane full of a shipment of Pepsi flying over Africa. It suddenly had a malfunction and went down. A few weeks later, PepsiCo sent a rescue plane out to look for the lost plane. They found the wreckage but were unable to locate the crew. They searched the area and found a […]...
27. As a sergeant in a parachute regiment As a sergeant in a parachute regiment I took part in serveral night time excersises. Once, I was seated next to a Lieutenant fresh from Jump School. He was quiet sad looked a bit pale so I struck up a conversation. “Scared, Lieutenant?”, I asked. He replied, “No, just a bit apperhensive.” I asked, “What’s […]...
28. There was a boy who worked in the produce section of the market There was a boy who worked in the produce section of the market. One day, a man came in and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce, but the man replied that he did not need a whole head, but only a […]...
29. A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, “When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?” The husband replied, “All I wanted to do […]...
30. An Irish man went to the courthouse to change his name An Irish man went to the courthouse to change his name legally changed. When he replied, the desk clerk asked “Can i help you sir?” Our man said “Yes, I would like to change my name.” “What is your current name?” asked the clerk. “Martin Arsehole,” replied the man. The clerk laughed, and said “I […]...
31. A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took one look at this woman and all his professionalism went out the window. He immediately told her to undress. After she had disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. Doing so, he asked her, “Do you know what I’m doing?” “Yes,” she replied, […]...
32. Make a last request Two men, sentenced to die in the electric chair on the same day were led down to the room in which they would meet their maker. The priest had given the last rites, the formal speech had been given by the warden, and a final prayer had been said among the participants. The Warden, turning […]...
33. PUPPY LOVE A man and his son were walking through a field, and saw two dogs mating. The little boy asked his Dad what was happening. The Father replied, “Well, son, they’re making a puppy.” The following evening, the little boy was thirsty, so he went from his bed to get a glass of water. Not being […]...
34. Перевод идиомы pull a stunt on (someone) / pull a trick on (someone), значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: pull a stunt on (someone) / pull a trick on (someone) Перевод: выкидывать какой-либо трюк, обмануть кого-либо Пример: If the boy pulls a stunt like he did last weekend he is going to be in much trouble with his parents. Если мальчик снова выкинет такой трюк, как в прошлые выходные, у него будут сильные […]...
35. The golf course A man playing on a new golf course got confused as to what hole he was on. He saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her and asked if she knew what hole he was playing. She replied, “I’m on the 7th hole, and you’re a hole behind me, so you […]...
36. Last Request Two men, sentenced to die in the electric chair on the same day, were led down to the room in which they would meet their maker. The priest had given them last rites, the formal speech had been given by the warden, and a final prayer had been said among the participants. The Warden, turning […]...
37. On preparing to return home from an out of town trip On preparing to return home from an out of town trip, this man got a small puppy as a present for his son. Not having time to get the paper work to take the puppy onboard, the man just hid the pup down the front of his pants and snunk him onboard the airplane.. About […]...
38. Flies A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. “What are you doing?” She asked. “Hunting Flies” He responded. “Oh. Killing any?” She asked. “Yep, 3 males, 2 Females,” he replied. Intrigued, she asked. “How can you tell?” He responded, “3 were on a beer can, 2 were […]...
39. Перевод слова excuse Excuse – извинение, причина, оправдание Перевод слова There is no excuse for it – это непростительно give them my excuses – извинитесь перед ними за меня to make excuses – оправдываться, находить отговорки That Excuse simply won’t wash. Такое оправдание неубедительно. Nothing can Excuse such neglect. Ничто не может служить оправданием такой небрежности. He Excused […]...
40. Quitting Smoking Vera: Hi, I thought you might be out here. Geez, it’s really cold! Paul: I know, but I really needed a Smoke break after that long meeting. Can I Bum one off you? I left my Pack of Cigarettes on my desk. Vera: Sure. Here’s my Lighter. What do you think about the new Incentives […]...