Annoying some waiters

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1. Перевод слова cough Cough – кашель Перевод слова To cough out mucus – отхаркивать мокроту medicine for a cough – лекарство от кашля to give a cough – покашлять It hurts me to Cough. Мне больно кашлять. He has a Cough and a cold. У него кашель и насморк. Love and a Cough cannot be hidden. Любовь и […]...
2. Значение идиомы neck [neck] See: BREATHE DOWN ONE’S NECK, BREAK ONE’S NECK, CATCH IT INTHE NECK or GET IT IN THE NECK, PAIN IN THE NECK, SAVE ONE’S NECK, STICK ONE’S NECK OUT....
3. A customer walks into a restaurant and notices A customer walks into a restaurant and notices a large sign on the wall that says, “$500 if we fail to fill your order.” When his waitress arrives, he orders elephant tail on rye. She calmly writes down his order and walks into the kitchen. Almost immediately he hears an explosion of voices. The restaurant […]...
4. A wild party Sam has been in the computer business for 25 years and is finally sick of the stress. He quits his job and buys 50 acres of land in Alabama to be as far away from humanity as possible. Sam sees the mailman once a week and gets groceries once a month. Otherwise, it’s total peace […]...
5. Kind of awkward A guy goes to a girl’s house for the first time and she shows him into the living room. She excuses herself to go to the kitchen to fix some drinks. As he’s standing there alone, he notices a cute little vase on the mantel. He picks it up and as he’s looking at it, […]...
6. Just before takeoff one day, a flight attendant Just before takeoff one day, a flight attendant approached Muhammad Ali and asked that he fasten his seat belt. “Superman don’t need no seat belt,” Ali growled. “Well, Superman,” the stewardess replied, “don’t need no airplane!”...
7. George W. Bush walks into a restaurant in Washington DC George W. Bush walks into a restaurant in Washington DC with his wife Laura. The waiter approaches the table and asks for his order. “I’ll have your biggest, juiciest London Broil,” answers the President. “But sir, what about the mad cow?!!” asks the waiter. “Oh,” answers Dubya, “she’ll order for herself.”...
8. Перевод слова neck Neck – шея Перевод слова To break the neck – свернуть шею up to the neck – по горло, по уши to break the neck of winter – оставить позади большую часть зимы nervy neck – мускулистая шея They Necked their Queen. Они отрубили голову своей королеве. She gave him a Neck massage. Она сделала […]...
9. Jokes of science 03 Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip? To get to the same side. Why did the chicken cross the road? Issac Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest, chickens in motion tend to cross roads. A neutron walks into a bar; he asks the bartender, “How much for a beer?” The bartender […]...
10. Перевод слова touch Touch – прикасаться, трогать Перевод слова Dry to the touch – сухой на ощупь touch of frost – заморозки a touch to the cap – приветствие прикосновением к шапке Don’t Touch my CDs! Не трогай мои диски! Bye. I’ll be in Touch. До свидания. Я буду на связи. How does this Touch me? Какое это […]...
11. A woman walks into a pet store A woman walks into a pet store wanting to buy a pet for her husband, but she finds all the pets are so so expensive. The woman says to the clerk at the counter, “I’m looking to buy a pet for my husband but I’m on a very short budget!.” “No worries,” replies the clerk. […]...
12. A woman walks into a shop that sells very expensive Persian rugs A woman walks into a shop that sells very expensive Persian rugs. She looks around and spots the perfect rug and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the texture of the rug she farts loudly. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and […]...
13. Значение идиомы charge up [charge up] {v. phr.} 1. To submit to a flow of electricity in order to make functional. I mustn’t forget to charge up my razor before we go on our trip. 2. To use up all the available credit one has on one’s credit card. “Let’s charge dinner on the Master Card,” Jane said. “Unfortunately […]...
14. Annoying phone calls The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. A co-worker of mine fielded phone calls from his Alumni Association every three months for about five years, ostensibly checking to see that his records were up to date, and coincidentally asking […]...
15. Перевод слова kitchen Kitchen – кухня Перевод слова Kitchen clobber – кухонные приспособления field kitchen – полевая кухня kitchen unit – кухонный комбайн the French kitchen – французская кухня Get out of the Kitchen! Выметайся из кухни! Who messed up the Kitchen? Кто устроил беспорядок на кухне? Lock the cat in the Kitchen. Закрой кота на кухне....
16. Перевод слова scream Scream – вопль, кричать, вопить Перевод слова To scream with delight – визжать от восторга to scream oneself hoarse – охрипнуть от крика to scream for help – звать на помощь a scream of terror – крик ужаса I Screamed for help. Я громко позвала на помощь. ‘Get out!’ she Screamed. – Вон отсюда! – […]...
17. How many does it take? Joe is having a drink in his local bar when in walks this gorgeous woman. Joe, not being too shy, goes up and sits next to her. He buys her a drink and then another and then another. After this and the accompanying small-talk, Joe asks her back to his place for a “good time.” […]...
18. Значение идиомы neck and neck [neck and neck] {adj. or adv.}, {informal} Equal or nearly equal ina race or contest; abreast; tied. At the end of the race the twohorses were neck and neck. For months John and Harry seemed to beneck and neck in Alice’s favor. Compare: NIP AND TUCK....
19. Appropriate punishment Through the kitchen window a farmer’s wife sees her son coming home from school. The boy’s in a bad mood, and as he crosses the field he kicks a pig. He walks a little further and kicks a cow. Once inside, his mother says, “I saw what you did, young man! For kicking the pig […]...
20. This pill allows you to fly A man went into a bar in a high rise. He saw another man take a pill, take a drink, walk to the window and jump out. He flew around for a minute and zipped back into the bar. As the amazed newcomer watched, the man repeated this twice more. Finally the man asked if […]...
21. I am afraid of that tarmac A motorway walks into a pub one day. He goes up to the bar and orders himself a drink. He just sits down when in walks a strip of tarmac. The motorway sees the tarmac and starts to panic so he jumps over the bar and ducks down so it won’t see him. The barman […]...
22. One day the different parts of the body One day the different parts of the body were having an argument to see which should be in charge. The brain said “I do all the thinking so I’m the most important and I should be in charge.” The eyes said “I see everything and let the rest of you know where we are, so […]...
23. Setting the Table William: This is a very special dinner. It’s not everyday that I have my bosses over for dinner. It has to be perfect. Martha: I know. Why do you think I took out our best China? Instead of worrying, why don’t you help me Set the table? William: Right. I should make myself useful. Is […]...
24. Значение идиомы catch it in the neck [catch it in the neck] or [get it in the neck] {v. phr.}, {slang} To be blamed or punished. Tom got it in the neck because he forgot to close the windows when it rained. Students get it in the neck when they lose library books. Compare: CATCH IT, GET WHAT’S COMING TO ONE....
25. Перевод слова whooping Whooping – коклюш Перевод слова Whooping-cough vaccine – коклюшная вакцина whooping cough – судорожный кашель Whooping cough occurs mainly in young children. Коклюшем болеют, в основном, маленькие дети. All you have to do is to go out there and tell him that your child has Whooping cough. Просто съезди к нему и скажи, что у […]...
26. Перевод идиомы neck and neck, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: neck and neck Перевод: голова в голову, наравне, не отставая (особенно в спорте, состязании, соревновании) Пример: The two teams were neck and neck in the race to win the national championship. Две команды шли наравне в гонке за выигрыш в национальном первенстве....
27. A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu. “I’m sorry sir, but I am blind, and can’t read the menu. Just bring me a dirty fork from a previous customer, I’ll smell it and order […]...
28. Значение идиомы in charge of [in charge of] {prep.} 1. Responsible for; having supervision orcare of. Marian is in charge of selling tickets. The girl incharge of refreshments forgot to order the ice cream for the party. When our class had a play, the teacher put Harold in charge of thestage curtain. 2. or [in the charge of] Under the […]...
29. You can’t bring that dog in this bar A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says “You can’t bring that dog in here!” The guy, without missing a beat, says “This is my seeing-eye dog.” “Oh man, ” the bartender says, “I’m sorry, here, the first one’s on […]...
30. Перевод слова charge Charge – заряжать, наполнять; возлагать ответственность; плата за услуги Перевод слова The emotional charge – эмоциональный заряд charge of surety – допускаемая нагрузка free of charge – бесплатно I Charge you not to go. Я требую, чтобы вы остались. The Charge for students is $8. Плата для студентов – $8. He is in Charge of […]...
31. A dog walks into a butcher shop A dog walks into a butcher shop with a purse strapped around his neck. He walks up to the meat case and calmly sits there until it’s his turn to be waited on. A man, who was already in the butcher shop, finished his purchase and noticed the dog. The butcher leaned over the counter […]...
32. Jerry Falwell was seated next to President Clinton Jerry Falwell was seated next to President Clinton on a recent flight. After the plane was airborne, the flight attendant came around for drink orders. The President asked for a whisky & soda, which was brought and placed before him. The attendant then asked the minister if he would also like drink. The minister replied […]...
33. An Annoying Cell Phone User Carl: I’m sorry, say that again. I couldn’t hear you Over that guy at the next table Shouting into his cell phone. Stephanie: That guy is so Rude. We’re trying to have a Leisurely conversation over a cup of coffee, and we have To out shout some Inconsiderate jerk. Carl: Do you think he realizes […]...
34. Значение идиомы in touch [in touch] {adj. phr.} Talking or writing to each other; giving andgetting news. John kept in touch with his school friends during thesummer. Police anywhere in the U. S. can get in touch instantlywith any other police department by teletype. The man claimed tobe in touch with people on another planet. Compare: KEEP TRACK. Contrast: […]...
35. A man walks into a bar and orders two drinks A man walks into a bar and orders two drinks. As the bartender watches he drinks one drink and pours the other one on his hand. He orders two more drinks and does the same thing. The third time the bartender asks him what’s going on. “Why are you pouring that drink on your hand”? […]...
36. Someone really stinks A young couple were on their honeymoon. The husband was sitting in the bathroom on the edge of the bathtub saying to himself, “Now how can I tell my wife that I’ve got really smelly feet and that my socks absolutely stink? I’ve managed to keep it from her while we were dating, but she’s […]...
37. Значение идиомы out of touch [out of touch] {adj. phr.} Not writing or talking with each other;not getting news anymore. Fred had got out of touch with people inhis hometown. On his island Robinson Crusoe was out of touch withworld news. Compare: LOSE TOUCH, LOSE TRACK. Contrast: IN TOUCH....
38. A bar name A guy walks into a store and says to the managaer “why doesn’t your store have a name”, the store manager says “I haven’t thought of one yet but I think u can help me, what’s your girlfriend’s name.” The guy says “Jenny” then the store owner says “What’s do you like most about Jenny” […]...
39. Значение идиомы breathe down one’s neck [breathe down one’s neck] {v. phr.}, {informal} To follow closely; threaten from behind; watch every action. Too many creditors were breathing down his neck. The carpenter didn’t like to work for Mr. Jones, who was always breathing down his neck....
40. Two guys are driving through Texas when Two guys are driving through Texas when they get pulled over by a state trooper. The trooper walks up, taps on the window with his nightstick, the driver rolls down the window, and the trooper smacks him in the head with the stick. The driver says, “Why’d you do that? The trooper says, “You’re in […]...