A robber was robbing a house

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1. Перевод слова robberRobber — грабитель, разбойник Перевод слова The very type of a robber den — настоящий воровской притон armed robber — вооруженный разбойник highway robber — разбойник с большой дороги The Robber hit him on the head with an iron bar, and he went out. Грабитель огрел его по голове железным прутом, и он вырубился. The ... Читать далее...
2. A Burglar is in Big TroubleA burglar has just made it into the house he’s intending ransacking, and he’s looking around for stuff to steal. All of a sudden, a little voice pipes up, «I can see you, and so can Jesus!» Startled, the burglar looks around the room. No one there at all, so he goes back to his ... Читать далее...
3. A woman was thinking about finding a petA woman was thinking about finding a pet to help keep her company at home. She decided she would like to find a beautiful parrot; it wouldn’t be as much work as say a dog, and it would be fun to hear it speak. She went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large ... Читать далее...
4. Значение идиомы rob the cradle[rob the cradle] {v. phr.}, {informal} To have dates with or marrya person much younger than yourself. When the old woman married ayoung man, everyone said she was robbing the cradle. -[cradle-robber] {n.} The judge died when he was seventy. He was areal cradle-robber because he left a thirty-year-old widow. -[cradle-robbing] {adj.} or {n.} Bob ... Читать далее...
5. Passing a parrotA lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, «Hey lady, you are really ugly.» Well, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work. On the way home she saw the same ... Читать далее...
6. Footless ParrotA guy is having marital problems. He and the wife are not communicating at all and he’s lonesome so he goes to a pet store thinking a pet might help. The store he happened to walk into specialized in parrots. As he wanders down the rows of parrots he notices one with no feet. Surprised ... Читать далее...
7. Never talk to the ParrotMrs. Peterson phoned the repairman because her dishwasher quit working. He couldn’t accommodate her with an «after-hours» appointment and since she had to go to work, she told him, «I’ll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dish washer, leave the bill on the counter, and I’ll mail you a check. By the way, ... Читать далее...
8. Using nails on a houseThese two newfies are building a house. One of them is putting on the siding. He picks up a nail, hammers it in. Picks up another nail, throws it away. Picks up a nail, hammers it in. Picks up another, throws it away. This goes on for a while, and finally his friend comes over ... Читать далее...
9. A middle-aged man recieves a brazillian parrotA middle-aged man recieves a brazillian parrot for his birthday. The only problem with this parrot is its attitude due to the influence of its former owner, who is now a deceased truck driver. The parrot loves to swear up and down at everything it sees. One day the man comes home with a gorgeous ... Читать далее...
10. The other day my house caught fireThe other day my house caught fire. The insurance agent said, «Shouldn’t be a problem. What kind of coverage do you have?» I said, «Fire and theft.» Insurance agent frowned. «Uh oh. Wrong kind. Should be fire OR theft.» Apparently, the only way I can make a claim with this coverage is if the house ... Читать далее...
11. A famous hypnotist was performing in a large auditoriumA famous hypnotist was performing in a large auditorium full of students one night. He began to speak in a soft and steady voice over the loud-speaker system. «Listen to the sound of my voice…», he kept repeating, «the sound of my voice… every word is a command… the sound of my voice…» Pretty soon, ... Читать далее...
12. Who keeps saying those thingsA man walked in to a bar after a long day at work. As he began to drink his beer, he heard a voice say seductively «You’ve got great hair!» The man looked around but couldn’t see where the voice was coming from, so he went back to his beer. A minute later, he heard ... Читать далее...
13. Anybody Home?A boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employee’s home phone number and was greeted with a child’s whispered, «Hello?» Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to the youngster, the boss asked, «Is ... Читать далее...
14. An old lady lived by herself in a small houseAn old lady lived by herself in a small house in a small town. One day she went to the local grocery store and while she was gone a criminal broke into her house, took her clothes off of the line, smashed the watermellons in her garden, shaved her cat and then left when he ... Читать далее...
15. A very Insulting ParrotThis elderly lady, recently widowed, decides to see if a pet will ease her loneliness and goes to the pet store. She decides against puppies, kitties, etc., and is about to leave the store when she hears a voice saying, «My, do you look lovely this afternoon, madam.» She turns around quickly to see who ... Читать далее...
16. A little girl came running into the house cryingA little girl came running into the house crying and miserable from a small cut she just received. She asked her mom for a glass of cider. «Why do you want cider?» asked Mom. «To take the pain away,» sobbed the little girl. Tired of all the tears, Mom poured her a glass. The little ... Читать далее...
17. Is there a doctor in the house?A strained voice called out through the darkened theater, «Please, is there a doctor in the house?!» Several men stood up as the lights came on. An older lady pulled her daughter to stand next to her, «Good, are any of you doctors single and interested in a date with a good, Jewish girl?»...
18. Two story houseA man appears before a judge one day, asking for a divorce. The judge quietly reviews some papers and then says, «Please tell me why you are seeking a divorce.» «Because,» the man says,»I live in a two-story house.» The Judge replies, «What kind of a reason is that? What is the big deal about ... Читать далее...
19. Purchasing a New BirdAfter many years of marriage, a husband has turned into a couch potato, became completely inattentive to his wife and sat guzzling beer and watching TV all day. The wife was dismayed because no matter what she did to attract the husband’s attention, he’d just shrug her off with some bored comment. This went on ... Читать далее...
20. Reward for goodnessThree men died in a car accident and met Jesus himself at the Pearly Gates. The Lord spoke unto them saying, «I will ask you each a simple question. If you tell the truth I will allow you into heaven, but if you lie….Hell is waiting for you. To the first man the Lord asked, ... Читать далее...
21. A man was walking in the street when he heard a voiceA man was walking in the street when he heard a voice: «Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you.» The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished. He went on, and after awhile ... Читать далее...
22. A necessary conditionThere were three little boys visiting their grandparents. The oldest came out and asked his grandpa, «Can you make a sound like a frog, Grandpappy? Grandpa (being in a kind of ill mood) responds, «No, I don’t really want to make the sound of a frog now.» So, the second little boy comes out and ... Читать далее...
23. Ghosts in a White HouseOne night Bill Clinton was awakened by George Washington’s ghost in the White House. «George, what is the best thing I could do to help the country?» Clinton asked. «Set an honest and honorable example, just as I did,» advised George. The next night the ghost of Thomas Jefferson moved through the dark bedroom. «Tom, ... Читать далее...
24. Значение идиомы house[house] See: BOARDING HOUSE REACH, BRING DOWN THE HOUSE, PUN HOUSE, HASH HOUSE, KEEP HOUSE, ON THE HOUSE, PARISH HOUSE, PEOPLE WHO LIVE INGLASS HOUSES SHOULD NOT THROW STONES, PLAGUE ON BOTH YOUR HOUSES orPLAGUE O’ BOTH YOUR HOUSES, PUT ONE’S HOUSE IN ORDER or SET ONE’SHOUSE TN ORDER....
25. Finding a House to BuyI’m looking to buy a house and I want a Single-family home. I have been living in a Townhouse for two years and I am tired of having Common walls and very small Yards. My new house will have to have a lot more Square footage, a large Lot size, an Open floor plan, great ... Читать далее...
26. Finding a House to BuyI’m looking to buy a house and I want a Single-family home. I have been living in a Townhouse for two years and I am tired of having Common walls and very small Yards. My new house will have to have a lot more Square footage, a large Lot size, an Open floor plan, great ... Читать далее...
27. The Preacher buys a ParrotA preacher is buying a parrot. «Are you sure it doesn’t scream, yell, or swear?» asked the preacher. «Oh absolutely. It’s a religious parrot,» the storekeeper assures him. «Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lord’s prayer, and when you pull on the left he ... Читать далее...
28. Перевод слова houseHouse — дом, здание, жилище Перевод слова Apartment house — многоквартирный дом house arrest — домашний арест at John’s house — у Джона Get out of my House! Убирайтесь из моего дома! I lost my House keys. Я потерял ключи от дома. A snail carries its own House. Улитка несет свой дом на спине....
29. Please show the I. DThe following supposedly a true story. This guy walked into a little corner store with a shot gun and demanded all the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the ... Читать далее...
30. Greetings prospective White House interns!Greetings prospective White House interns! This year, our program is heading into its 69th year of bringing America’s best and brightest to the Nation’s Capitol to help the «Head Man» do his job. We expect that 1998 will be the most exciting one yet! Why, you might be asking yourself, do I want to be ... Читать далее...
31. Jesus and Moses are sitting in a boat fishingJesus and Moses are sitting in a boat fishing and Jesus says to Moses «I want to do a miracle so we can feel like the good old days.» and Moses says «Yeah sure.» So Jesus gets up and says «I think I’ll walk on the water, that was always a good one.» So Jesus ... Читать далее...
32. One Sunday, the pope REALLY wanted to play golfOne Sunday, the pope REALLY wanted to play golf. But he couldn’t, since it was Sunday. But he figured, well, it’s ok if i just play a little bit. So he changed clothes and went out into the green. Up in heaven an angel saw him and reported it to Jesus. However, Jesus didn’t do ... Читать далее...
33. ZHow offensive is that?How offensive is that? Jesus has just been nailed to the cross and has begun to suffer from the wounds, A crowd has gathered to watch and sympathize with Him. As Jesus looks out over the gathering he calls to one of his apostle’s. «Paul… Paul,» He calls out. Paul hears his name and comes ... Читать далее...
34. Magician and ParrotMagician and Parrot A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. The audience would be different each week, so the magician allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: The captain’s parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician ... Читать далее...
35. Taking Up a New HobbyEric: Who were you talking to on the phone? Melissa: My mother. I was Commiserating with her about Dad’s Retirement. Eric: Your father retired two months ago. That was a good thing, right? Melissa: Well, it’s good that he doesn’t have to work anymore, but he’s Driving my mother up the wall. He Putters around ... Читать далее...
36. A man walked into a gift shop that sold religious itemsA man walked into a gift shop that sold religious items. Near the cash register he saw a display of caps with «WWJD» printed on all of them. He was puzzled over what the letters could mean, but couldn’t figure it out, so he asked the clerk. The clerk replied that the letters stood for ... Читать далее...
37. Значение идиомы put one’s house in order[put one’s house in order] or [set one’s house in order] {v. phr.}To arrange your affairs in good order. Grandfather knew he wouldnot live long and set his house in order. When Mr. Black died, hislawyer helped the widow put her house in order....
38. There was this little boy who went in the whore houseThere was this little boy who went in the whore house with a dead frog on a leash. He went to the counter and asked the pimp for a whore with aids, the man knew he was young but the boy said «please mister, just give me a whore with aids, i have money thats ... Читать далее...
39. Значение идиомы parrot-fashion[parrot-fashion] {adv.} Like a parrot; by rote memorization andwithout any understanding. The candidate delivered a speech thatwas prepared for him and he read it parrot-fashion....
40. Значение идиомы bring down the house[bring down the house] {v. phr.}, {informal} To start an audience laughing or clapping enthusiastically. The principal’s story was funny in itself and also touched their loyalties, so it brought down the house. The President made a fine speech which brought down the house....