A man is walking along one day and he comes upon a ladder

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1. Перевод слова ladder Ladder – лестница Перевод слова Escape ladder – спасательная лестница accommodation ladder – приставная лестница to put up a ladder – ставить, приставлять лестницу career ladder – карьерная лестница I can’t get at the top branches, can you bring the Ladder? Я не достаю до верхних веток, принеси мне, пожалуйста, лестницу. He climbed up the […]...
2. Перевод идиомы at the bottom of the ladder / on the bottom of the ladder, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: at the bottom of the ladder / on the bottom of the ladder Перевод: с самой низкой оплатой и должностью в компании или организации Пример: I will start at the bottom of the ladder at my new job. На новой работе я начну с самой низшей должности и оплаты....
3. An old italian couple is walking around in the mall An old italian couple is walking around in the mall. After a while they get separated so the woman goes up to the first saleswoman she sees and ask: “Escusa me, have you senn-a me Tony. He’s got a big-a belly and a-lots of curly black hair?” The saleswoman answers that she hasn’t seen her […]...
4. A drunk leaves a bar and decides to take a shortcut A drunk leaves a bar and decides to take a shortcut through a graveyard. It is raining heavily and very dark. The drunk fails to see an open grave and falls into it. He tries to climb out of it, but it is too deep and the rain has turned the dirt to mud and […]...
5. A recently divorced woman is walking along the beach A recently divorced woman is walking along the beach contemplating how badly screwed she got over the divorce settlement, when she spies a magic lamp washing up onshore. She rubs the lamp, and out pops a magical genie!! The genie notices her anger and lets her vent her troubles to him. As a consolation, the […]...
6. The office happenings Quote from a recent meeting: “We are going to continue having these meetings, everyday, until I find out why no work is getting done”. Quote from the Boss… “I didn’t say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame it on you.” A motivational sign at work: The beatings will continue until […]...
7. Schick is walking down the boardwalk in Atlantic City Schick is walking down the boardwalk in Atlantic City, runs into a hooker, and he says, “How much?” She says, “Twenty bucks.” He says, “All right.” They climb down under the boardwalk, and he bangs her. The next night, he runs into the same hooker, they go under the boardwalk, only this time while he’s […]...
8. Перевод слова attractive Attractive – привлекательный, очаровательный Перевод слова Attractive smile – очаровательная улыбка attractive package – привлекательная упаковка attractive girl – очаровательная девушка sexually attractive – соблазнительный I must say, it’s a very Attractive offer. Я должен сказать, это очень привлекательное предложение. Women seem to find him Attractive. Женщины находят его привлекательным. Происхождение слова attractive Образовано от […]...
9. Перевод слова success Success – успех, удача, процветание Перевод слова Military successes – военные успехи to achieve success – добиться успеха to have great success in life – преуспеть в жизни He is sure of Success. Он уверен в успехе. His plan was a Success. Его план удался. The Success repays hard work. Успех – это вознаграждение за […]...
10. Your hair smells nice A man walks up to a woman in his office and tells her that her hair smells nice. The woman immediately goes into her supervisor’s office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit and explains why. The supervisor is puzzled by this time and says, “What’s wrong with the coworker […]...
11. Hair spray A man was driving along the highway, and saw a rabbit hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the rabbit, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of the car and was hit. The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side […]...
12. Jewish fly A man goes into a bar and sits down to have a drink….he notices that at the other end of the bar is the most attractive woman he has ever seen….he is immediately lust-struck and decides that he must have her….He leans over to the bartender and asks if the bartender has any Spanish-fly in […]...
13. This 60 year old woman was walking along 5th Avenue This 60 year old woman was walking along 5th Avenue when she heard a voice from above “You will live to be 100.” She looked around and didn’t see anyone. Again she heard “You will live to be 100.” Boy, she thought to herself, that was the voice of God. I’ve got 40 more years […]...
14. Manly signs “Doctor, doctor!” shouted the woman coming into the doctors offfice. “I think I’m turning into a man” then the doctor says, ” Now hold on little lady what makes you think that you’re turning into a man?” ” Well” said the woman “I’m starting to grow hair on my chest” and then the doctor asked, […]...
15. An Unusual Ailment A man and a woman are riding next to each other in first class. The man sneezes, pulls out his wang and wipes the tip off. The woman can’t believe what she just saw and decides she is hallucinating. A few minutes pass. The man sneezes again. He pulls out his wang and wipes the […]...
16. The Career Ladder – Карьерная лестница Getting a job When Paul left school he applied for (= wrote an official request for) a job in the accounts department of a local engineering company. They gave him a job as a trainee (= a very junior person in a company). He didn’t earn very much but they gave him a lot of […]...
17. How Army policy began This is Army policy all begins… Start with a cage containing five apes. In the cage, hang a banana on a string and put stairs under it. Before long, an ape will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the Banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the apes […]...
18. Once upon a time a man was walking down Once upon a time a man was walking down the street. He saw an ancient oil lamp in an ash can and, thinking of the Aladdin legend, he picked up and rubbed it. Sure enough, out popped a genie. “Master, I shall now grant you one wish.” The man spoke, his eyes bulging with desire. […]...
19. Перевод идиомы get in someone’s hair, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: get in someone’s hair Идиома: get in someone’s hair разг. Перевод: мешать, беспокоить, раздражать кого-либо Пример: The woman complained that her young child was always getting in her hair. Женщина жаловалась, что ее ребенок постоянно досаждал ей....
20. Перевод идиомы climb the wall(s), значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: climb the wall(s) Перевод: лезть на стену (от раздражения, скуки, и т. п.) Пример: The woman began to climb the wall after only a few days at her new job. Женщина готова была лезть на стену после всего нескольких дней на новой работе....
21. A state-of-the-art watch A cowboy walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance then causally looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and asks, “Is your date running late?” “No”, he replies,”I just got this state-of the-art watch, and I was just […]...
22. Перевод слова climb Climb – взбираться, влезать, подниматься Перевод слова To climb to power – стремиться к власти, добиваться власти difficult climb – тяжелое восхождение dizzy climb – головокружительный подъем Harry Climbed the stairs. Гарри поднялся по лестнице. He Climbed over the fence. Он перелез через забор. He Climbed into his clothes. Он натянул на себя одежду....
23. A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard which is full and bushy. […]...
24. Appearance В топике Внешность автор делится своими мыслями о том, как привлекательная внешность влияет на судьбу человека. Всегда ли красота приносит счастье? Или лучше постараться стать интересным человеком, ведь только такие люди – привлекательны всегда. How important is it for you to be attractive? Although everyone wants to be good looking, do you think beautiful people […]...
25. Значение идиомы hair [hair] See: CURL ONE’S HAIR, GET GRAY HAIR or GET GRAY, GIVE GRAYHAIR, HANG BY A THREAD or HANG BY A HAIR, HIDE OR HAIR or HIDE NORHAIR, IN ONE’S HAIR, LET ONE’S HAIR DOWN, OUT OF ONE’S HAIR, SPLITHAIRS, TEAR ONE’S HAIR....
26. Перевод слова hair Hair – волосы Перевод слова Blond hair – белокурые волосы bush of hair – копна волос fly-away hair – пушистые, развевающиеся волосы Fix your Hair! Причеши волосы! She has dark Hair. У нее темные волосы. She pinned up her Hair. Она заколола свои волосы....
27. A visiting conventioneer from Saskatchewan walked A visiting conventioneer from Saskatchewan walked into a bar in Greenwich Village and sat next to a rather attractive woman. “Hi,” he said, “I’m new in town. Can I buy you a drink?” “Get lost,” she remarked, “I am Lesbian.” “Oh, really?” he asked, “How are things in Beiruit?”...
28. Значение идиомы climb the wall [climb the wall] {v. phr.}, {slang}, {informal} 1. To react to a challenging situation with too great an emotional response, frustration, tension, and anxiety. By the time I got the letter that I was hired, I was ready to climb the wall. 2. To be so disinterested or bored as to be most anxious to […]...
29. An elderly couple, still very loving after all these years An elderly couple, still very loving after all these years, is shocked when the woman’s doctor says she has a heart condition that could kill her at any time. She is to avoid stress, eat right, and never, ever have sex again – the strain would be too much. The couple reluctantly try to live […]...
30. A folk remedy A man’s wife had been in a coma for several days following a particularly nasty knock on the head. As usual, one of the nurses in the hospital was giving her a wash in bed. As she washed down the woman’s body, she sponged her pubic hair. Out of the corner of her eye she […]...
31. Перевод идиомы out of one’s hair, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: out of one’s hair Перевод: уйти и не беспокоить, волновать, досаждать кому-либо Пример: The woman got her children out of her hair and was able to do some work. Женщина сделала так, чтобы дети ей больше не досаждали, и смогла немного поработать....
32. A man was driving up a steep and narrow mountain road A man was driving up a steep and narrow mountain road. A woman was driving down the same road. As they passed each other, the woman leaned out the window and yelled, “Pig!” The man immediately leaned out his window and replied, “Bitch!” They continue on their way and as the man rounded the next […]...
33. The office playboy had a date with an attractive young woman The office playboy had a date with an attractive young woman. The next day someone asked him how things had gone. “She uses too many four-letter words for me,” was the reply. “Really?” “Yes,” answered the playboy. “All evening long she was saying “don’t” and “stop” and “quit that.”...
34. Appearance: Parts of the Face – Внешность People who can’t hear often learn to understand a spoken language with their eyes. They watch the mouth of the person talking and follow the movement of his lips. This is called lip-reading. Some people think the distance between your hair and your eyebrows is a sign of how you are intelligent. The bigger your […]...
35. Conversation over dinner Conversation over dinner: WOMAN: What would you do if I died? Would you get married again? MAN: Definitely not! WOMAN: Why not – don’t you like being married? MAN: Of course I do. WOMAN: Then why wouldn’t you remarry? MAN: Okay, I’d get married again. WOMAN: You would? (with a hurtful look on her face) […]...
36. Rapunzel There were once a man and a woman who had long, in vain, wished for a child. At length it appeared that God was about to grant their desire. These people had a little window at the back of their house from which a splendid garden could be seen, which was full of the most […]...
37. A woman asks her husband to buy her a fur coat A woman asks her husband to buy her a fur coat for their 25th anniversary. “HA,” he snorted, “The day I buy you a fur coat will be the day you can grow hair on your chest!” On that she hikes up her skirt, drops her panties, and thrusts her pubic area forward. “There! I […]...
38. Be afraid if you annoy this husband A man and woman where on their honeymoon after a long and very happy courtship. On their honeymoon, they decide to take their horses through the beautiful mountain passes of Europe. As the horses were crossing a small stream, the woman’s horse mis-steps and jostles the man’s wife. Once across the stream, the man dismounts, […]...
39. Doing the Dishes A young man has always dreamed on owning a Harley Davidson. One day he has finally saved up enough money so he goes down to the dealer. After picking out the perfect bike the dealer warns him that if he leaves his Harley in the rain the chrome has a tendency to rust. He tells […]...
40. These Chickens want Books A pair of chickens walk up to the circulation desk at a public library and say, ‘Buk Buk BUK.’ The librarian decides that the chickens desire three books, and gives it to them…and the chickens leave shortly thereafter. Around midday, the two chickens return to the circulation desk quite vexed and say,’ Buk Buk BuKKOOK!’ […]...