A man is walking along one day and he comes upon a ladder

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1. Перевод слова ladderLadder — лестница Перевод слова Escape ladder — спасательная лестница accommodation ladder — приставная лестница to put up a ladder — ставить, приставлять лестницу career ladder — карьерная лестница I can’t get at the top branches, can you bring the Ladder? Я не достаю до верхних веток, принеси мне, пожалуйста, лестницу. He climbed up the ... Читать далее...
2. Перевод идиомы at the bottom of the ladder / on the bottom of the ladder, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: at the bottom of the ladder / on the bottom of the ladder Перевод: с самой низкой оплатой и должностью в компании или организации Пример: I will start at the bottom of the ladder at my new job. На новой работе я начну с самой низшей должности и оплаты....
3. An old italian couple is walking around in the mallAn old italian couple is walking around in the mall. After a while they get separated so the woman goes up to the first saleswoman she sees and ask: «Escusa me, have you senn-a me Tony. He’s got a big-a belly and a-lots of curly black hair?» The saleswoman answers that she hasn’t seen her ... Читать далее...
4. This guy is walking through Chinatown and sees a buildingThis guy is walking through Chinatown and sees a building with a sign «Hans Olaffsen’s Laundry.» «Hans Olaffsen?», he thinks. «How in the world does that fit in here?» So, he walks into the shop and sees an old Chinese gentleman sitting in the corner. The visitor asks, «How in the world did this place ... Читать далее...
5. Punishment in hellA man dies, and he’s looking in the gates of hell. There he sees John Kennedy with an incredibly ugly girl. The man turns to the Devil and asks why John Kennedy is with this hideous looking person. The Devil replies, «Well, John has done some bad things in his life and that’s his punishment.» ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова uglyUgly — уродливый, безобразный, противный Перевод слова Ugly clothes — некрасивая одежда ugly building — уродливое здание ugly habits — скверные привычки He has an Ugly disposition. У него отвратительный характер. Jealousy is an Ugly emotion. Ревность — это неприятное чувство. The prince was transformed into an Ugly animal. Принц был превращен в ужасного дикого ... Читать далее...
7. A recently divorced woman is walking along the beachA recently divorced woman is walking along the beach contemplating how badly screwed she got over the divorce settlement, when she spies a magic lamp washing up onshore. She rubs the lamp, and out pops a magical genie!! The genie notices her anger and lets her vent her troubles to him. As a consolation, the ... Читать далее...
8. Pappy sees Elmer walking with a lantern and asksPappy sees Elmer walking with a lantern and asks, «Where ya going boy?» The son smiled and replied, «I’m a-going courting Peggy-Sue.» The Father said, «When I went a-courtin’, I didn’t need me no dang lantern.» «Sure Pa, I know.» the boy said. «And look what you got!»...
9. Schick is walking down the boardwalk in Atlantic CitySchick is walking down the boardwalk in Atlantic City, runs into a hooker, and he says, «How much?» She says, «Twenty bucks.» He says, «All right.» They climb down under the boardwalk, and he bangs her. The next night, he runs into the same hooker, they go under the boardwalk, only this time while he’s ... Читать далее...
10. This guy was walking down the sidewalk when he sees a Little JohnnyThis guy was walking down the sidewalk when he sees a Little Johnny wearing a red firefighter’s hat and sitting in a red wagon which is being pulled slowly by a large Labador Retriever. When he got a little closer, he saw that the kid was holding a rope which is tied to the dog’s ... Читать далее...
11. A guy is sitting in a bar next to a really ugly womanA guy is sitting in a bar next to a really ugly woman. She has a parrot on her shoulder. Woman says: If you can tell me what kind of animal I have on my shoulder…I’ll sleep with you.» Guy says: «An alligator?» Woman says: «Close enough»...
12. This black guy is walking along a beach whenThis black guy is walking along a beach when he looks down a sees an antique lamp. Thinking that he’ll get enough money for another vial of crack, he takes the bottle home and starts to clean it. He starts rubbing the lamp, when all of a sudden a Jewish genie appears, and being a ... Читать далее...
13. Collection 13We know that you would give your life for us. Promise! When you pass away and people ask me what the cause of your death was, I’ll say it was your stupidity. Well, I’ll see you in my dreams — if I eat too much. Hey, I remember you when you had only one stomach. ... Читать далее...
14. A man goes to a psychiatristA man goes to a psychiatrist. To start things off, the psychiatrist suggests they start with a Rorschach Test. He holds up the first picture and asks the man what he sees. «A man and a woman making love in a park,» the man replies. The psychiatrist holds up the second picture and asks the ... Читать далее...
15. Перевод слова successSuccess — успех, удача, процветание Перевод слова Military successes — военные успехи to achieve success — добиться успеха to have great success in life — преуспеть в жизни He is sure of Success. Он уверен в успехе. His plan was a Success. Его план удался. The Success repays hard work. Успех — это вознаграждение за ... Читать далее...
16. How Army policy beganThis is Army policy all begins… Start with a cage containing five apes. In the cage, hang a banana on a string and put stairs under it. Before long, an ape will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the Banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the apes ... Читать далее...
17. Harry and his wife are driving in the countryHarry and his wife are driving in the country when he sees a sign that says, «Cow For Sale…$5000.» He pulls in and says to the farmer, «There’s no cow in the world worth five thousand dollars.» The farmer says, Oh, yeah? Take a look at this.» He lifts the cow’s tail, and Harry sees ... Читать далее...
18. A cop sees a car weaving all over the road and pulls it overA cop sees a car weaving all over the road and pulls it over. He walks up to the car and sees a nice-looking woman is driving and smells liquor on her breath. He says, «I’m going to have to give you the breathalyzer test to determine if you are under the influence of alcohol.» ... Читать далее...
19. This 60 year old woman was walking along 5th AvenueThis 60 year old woman was walking along 5th Avenue when she heard a voice from above «You will live to be 100.» She looked around and didn’t see anyone. Again she heard «You will live to be 100.» Boy, she thought to herself, that was the voice of God. I’ve got 40 more years ... Читать далее...
20. The Career Ladder — Карьерная лестницаGetting a job When Paul left school he applied for (= wrote an official request for) a job in the accounts department of a local engineering company. They gave him a job as a trainee (= a very junior person in a company). He didn’t earn very much but they gave him a lot of ... Читать далее...
21. Once upon a time a man was walking downOnce upon a time a man was walking down the street. He saw an ancient oil lamp in an ash can and, thinking of the Aladdin legend, he picked up and rubbed it. Sure enough, out popped a genie. «Master, I shall now grant you one wish.» The man spoke, his eyes bulging with desire. ... Читать далее...
22. Значение идиомы ugly duckling[ugly duckling] {n.} An ugly or plain child who grows up to bepretty and attractive. Mary was the ugly duckling in her family, until she grew up....
23. Перевод идиомы climb the wall(s), значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: climb the wall(s) Перевод: лезть на стену (от раздражения, скуки, и т. п.) Пример: The woman began to climb the wall after only a few days at her new job. Женщина готова была лезть на стену после всего нескольких дней на новой работе....
24. Cow on Train TracksA passenger train is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside. «What’s going on?» she yells out the window. «Cow on the track!» replies the conductor. Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace. Within five minutes, however, it stops again. The woman sees ... Читать далее...
25. Перевод слова climbClimb — взбираться, влезать, подниматься Перевод слова To climb to power — стремиться к власти, добиваться власти difficult climb — тяжелое восхождение dizzy climb — головокружительный подъем Harry Climbed the stairs. Гарри поднялся по лестнице. He Climbed over the fence. Он перелез через забор. He Climbed into his clothes. Он натянул на себя одежду....
26. Значение идиомы climb the wall[climb the wall] {v. phr.}, {slang}, {informal} 1. To react to a challenging situation with too great an emotional response, frustration, tension, and anxiety. By the time I got the letter that I was hired, I was ready to climb the wall. 2. To be so disinterested or bored as to be most anxious to ... Читать далее...
27. Значение идиомы in the clouds[in the clouds] {adj. phr.} Far from real life; in dreams; infancy; in thought. When Alice agreed to marry Jim, Jim went home inthe clouds. — Often used with «head», «mind», «thoughts». Mary islooking out the window, not at the chalkboard; her head is in theclouds again. A good teacher should have his head in ... Читать далее...
28. Three calamitiesThree guys are in a Cessna. The first drops a penny out the window. The second drops a pencil and the third a bomb. When the plane lands, the first guy goes to see where the penny landed. He sees a guy swearing and trying to get a penny out of his forehead. The second ... Читать далее...
29. The office happeningsQuote from a recent meeting: «We are going to continue having these meetings, everyday, until I find out why no work is getting done». Quote from the Boss… «I didn’t say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame it on you.» A motivational sign at work: The beatings will continue until ... Читать далее...
30. The wife of an older man is distraughtThe wife of an older man is distraught because her husband’s um… little sailor can’t salute anymore. She goes to her local doctor and explains the situation and the doctor just feels plain bad for her. The doc thinks for a little bit, turns to the woman and says, «listen, I don’t do this for ... Читать далее...
31. A construction worker was whistlingA construction worker was whistling and verbally harassing a young girl as she walked by the construction site. She completely ignored him, and just kept on walking. Annoyed the worker yelled «Well you’re an ugly bitch anyway!» The girl turned around and replied «It must be terrible when even an ugly bitch won’t give you ... Читать далее...
32. Passing a parrotA lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, «Hey lady, you are really ugly.» Well, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work. On the way home she saw the same ... Читать далее...
33. Conversation over dinnerConversation over dinner: WOMAN: What would you do if I died? Would you get married again? MAN: Definitely not! WOMAN: Why not — don’t you like being married? MAN: Of course I do. WOMAN: Then why wouldn’t you remarry? MAN: Okay, I’d get married again. WOMAN: You would? (with a hurtful look on her face) ... Читать далее...
34. Majority rulesSo it seems that these four rabbis had a series of theological arguments, and three were always in accord against the fourth. One day, the odd rabbi out, after the usual «3 to 1, majority rules» statement that signified that he had lost again, decided to appeal to a higher authority. «Oh, God!» he cried. ... Читать далее...
35. A woman goes into a bar with a little Chihuahua dogA woman goes into a bar with a little Chihuahua dog on a leash. She sits down at the bar next to a drunk. The drunk rolls around, leans over, and splat! He pukes all over the dog. The drunk looks down, sees the little dog struggling in the pool of vomit, and slurs, «I ... Читать далее...
36. Перевод идиомы have one’s head in the clouds, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: have one’s head in the clouds Перевод: витать в облаках; быть рассеянным, не понимать, что происходит Пример: The boy has his head in the clouds and does not think about what is going on around him. Мальчик постоянно витает в облаках, и не думает о том, что происходит вокруг него. Shelly is a daydreamer. ... Читать далее...
37. Ne day, this man, Tony, diedOne day, this man, Tony, died. When he was sent to be judged, he was told that he had committed a sin, and that he could not go to heaven right away. He asked what he did and God told him that he cheated on his income taxes, and that the only way he could ... Читать далее...
38. Where are we goingAn American man, a Russian man, and an African man were all up in a hot-air balloon together. After a few minutes, the Russian man put his hand down through the clouds. «Aaah!» he said. «We’re right over my homeland.» «How can you tell?» asked the American. «I can feel the cold air.» he replied. ... Читать далее...
39. Two old friends are having coffee when the first woman saysTwo old friends are having coffee when the first woman says, «I hear that you’ve been telling people that I’m ugly!» «Oh NO! I’ve just been saying that your new hairdo makes you look less attractive.» «I also heard that you’ve been calling me fat?!?» «Oh NO! I just said that the way you wear ... Читать далее...
40. A guy is stranded on an island with only aA guy is stranded on an island with only a Doberman and a pig for company. There’s plenty of food and water, and the weather is beautiful, so he’s doing alright—but after a few months he gets «lonely», if you know what I mean. The pig starts to look more and more attractive—soft, pink flesh, ... Читать далее...