Two men went to the desert for a vacation

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1. A lusty camelA man rented a camel to make a trip to an important customer out in the desert. There was only one camel available, and it had one little problem, the guy told him. Periodically, this camel would stop and refuse to move until somebody beat it off. The man is desperate, so he decides he ... Читать далее...
2. Перевод слова desertDesert — пустыня; заслуга, награда; оставлять, покидать Перевод слова The Sahara Desert — пустыня Сахара to recognize real desert — видеть подлинные достоинства to each according to his deserts — каждому по заслугам the streets were deserted — улицы были пустынны He has got his just Deserts. Он получил по заслугам. They were lost in ... Читать далее...
3. A fellow, who had spent his whole life in the desertA fellow, who had spent his whole life in the desert, comes to visit a friend. He’d never seen a train or the tracks they run on. While standing in the middle of the railroad tracks one day, he hears this whistle — Whooee da Whoee! — but doesn’t know what it is. Predictably, he’s ... Читать далее...
4. Перевод слова vacationVacation — отпуск, каникулы, освобождение Перевод слова Christmas vacation — рождественские каникулы vacation of a position — уход с поста; отставка to take a vacation — брать отпуск, уходить в очередной отпуск She was away on Vacation. Она уехала в отпуск. Did you have a good Vacation? Хорошо ли вы провели отпуск? I got a ... Читать далее...
5. An old bloke in the Northern Territory was showingAn old bloke in the Northern Territory was showing some tourists how to top up a camel with water. «That way,» he said, «You get an extra day out of them between drinks.» As the camel bent down to drink, the bloke picked up two bricks and bashed them over the camel’s balls. The camel ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова camelCamel — верблюд Перевод слова One-humped camel — одногорбый верблюд hump of a camel — горб верблюда camel-bird — страус break the camel’s back — переполнить чашу терпения Did you ever ride a Camel? Вы когда-нибудь катались на верблюде? The Camel is specially adapted to its hostile desert habitat. Верблюд адаптирован для враждебной среды обитания ... Читать далее...
7. You’re in the Desert16 Ways of Knowing You’re in the Desert You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water. You can say 110 degrees without fainting. You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off. You can make instant sun tea. You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron. The temperature drops below ... Читать далее...
8. Returning from her vacationReturning from her vacation, the young secretary was telling anyone who would listen about what a fun time she had. She then asked for two weeks leave in which to get married. «But you just had two weeks off,» said the boss. «Why didn’t you get married then?» «What and ruin my vacation?» she whined....
9. Camel DiedCamel Died A nun and a priest are riding a camel through the dessert. After a few days the camel falls over dead. After looking over the situation the priest figures neither one of them will survive the rest of the journey. The priest asks the nun «I have never seen a woman’s breasts, and ... Читать далее...
10. Перевод идиомы on vacation, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: on vacation Перевод: в отпуске Пример: I plan to be on vacation for the first two weeks of March. Я собираюсь отправиться в отпуск в первые две недели марта....
11. Перевод идиомы take a vacation, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: take a vacation Перевод: отправиться куда-либо в отпуск Пример: I have much stress at work and I want to take a vacation next month. Я испытываю много стресса на работе, и в следующем месяце я хочу уйти в отпуск....
12. Outdoor Vacation Sports and ActivitiesEmma: Are you ready? Ricardo: Sure, but why are you dressed like that? I thought we were going to play Golf with Kareem and Karen. Emma: I told them we’re going Rock climbing instead. Ricardo: I was really looking forward to a game of golf. Emma: You play golf all the time. How often do ... Читать далее...
13. Диалог на английском языке с переводом «Отпуск на море с семьей» (Family vacation at the sea)— Hi, Julia! Welcome back to work! How was your vacation? — It was so much fun. I really enjoyed it. — Where did you go? — I went to Halkidiki, a popular beach resort in Greece. — Who did you go with? — I went with my father, mother and an elder sister. — ... Читать далее...
14. Chris Columbus Directed Home Alone Instead of Christmas Vacation Because He Met Chevy ChaseJames Hughes, son of the legendary writer and director John Hughes, put together an oral history of Home Alone for Chicago magazine. In it, he reveals how the film ultimately found its director, Chris Columbus. After directing the 1988 flop Heartbreak Hotel, Columbus was worried about finding a new directing gig. Which is part of ... Читать далее...
15. Chain Letter Type lIChain Letter Type lI: Make a wish!!! (This is where you have to scroll down) Really, go on and make one wish!!! Oh please, s/he’ll never go out with you!!! Wish something else!!! Not *that* either, you pervert!! Is your finger getting tired yet? You Can Stop now moron!!!!!!!! Wasn’t that fun? Hope you made ... Читать далее...
16. Перевод слова upsetUpset — расстройство, огорчение; выводить из равновесия, опрокидывать Перевод слова Mental upset — психическое расстройство to upset a boat — опрокинуть лодку a bit of an upset with his father — небольшая размолвка с отцом to upset everything in the house — перевернуть все в доме He was Upset but never let it show. Он ... Читать далее...
17. Read — it’s funAn elderly gentleman… Had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to a doctor who was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100% The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, ‘Your hearing is ... Читать далее...
18. An Other oneThree old guys are out walking. First one says, ‘Windy, isn’t it?’ Second one says, ‘No, it’s Thursday!’ Third one says, ‘So am I. Let’s go get a beer.’ A man was telling his neighbor, ‘I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it’s state of the art. It’s ... Читать далее...
19. Мой отпуск/ My VacationНа английском языке Перевод на русский язык My Vacation Мой отпуск I like spending my holidays actively. My favourite time for the vacation is summer because it’s warm and sunny. It’s a good time for the seaside holiday. This year together with my older sister we’ve been to Crimea. There are lots of beautiful cities ... Читать далее...
20. Having Hearing ProblemsBernadette: Why are you Mumbling? Claude: I’m not. I said, “What’s wrong with your Hearing?” Bernadette: Nothing is wrong with my hearing. You just need To speak up. Claude: I’m Practically shouting. You need to see a doctor about your Hearing loss. Bernadette: I’m not Hard of hearing. It’s probably just a Buildup of Earwax. ... Читать далее...
21. Staying in a Vacation RentalGeorge: I’m kind of nervous staying in a Vacation rental for the first time. Marnie: Don’t worry. Before I Booked this unit, I checked it out thoroughly. It’s Pet-friendly and Kid-friendly, and it Sleeps six, so it’ll be perfect for the whole family. George: But there won’t be the same Amenities or services as a ... Читать далее...
22. God Meets BureaucracyIn the beginning God Created heaven and the earth. Quickly he was faced with a class action suit for failure to file an environmental impact statement. He was granted a temporary permit for the project, but was stymied with the Cease and Desist order for the earthly part. Appearing at the hearing, God was asked ... Читать далее...
23. A long-haired youth was hitchhiking through the deep SouthA long-haired youth was hitchhiking through the deep South. He got a ride from a mean-looking redneck trucker. After riding about 30 miles in silence, the youth finally said, «Well, aren’t you going to ask me?» «Ask you what?» replied the trucker. «If I’m a boy or a girl,» answered the youth. «Don’t matter,» replied ... Читать далее...
24. An old woman came into her doctors officeAn old woman came into her doctor’s office and confessed to an embarrassing problem. «I fart all the time, Doctor Johnson, but they’re soundless, and they have no odor. In fact, since I’ve been here, I’ve farted no less than twenty times. What can I do?» «Here’s a prescription, Mrs. Harris. Take these pills three ... Читать далее...
25. Earn it hikingA father came home from a long business trip to find his son riding a very fancy new 10 speed bike. «Where did you get the money for the bike? It must have cost $300.» «Easy, Dad,» the boy replied. «I earned it hiking.» «Come on,» the father said. «Tell me the truth.» «That is ... Читать далее...
26. Reward for goodnessThree men died in a car accident and met Jesus himself at the Pearly Gates. The Lord spoke unto them saying, «I will ask you each a simple question. If you tell the truth I will allow you into heaven, but if you lie….Hell is waiting for you. To the first man the Lord asked, ... Читать далее...
27. Summertime Vacations (Fast)I think the best summer vacation I’ve ever taken was when I went Out East a few years ago. Two of my friends and I went on a two-week road trip. At the time, I was living in St. Paul, Minnesota, in the Midwest of the United States. Anyway, we started off camping every night, ... Читать далее...
28. Little Red Riding Hood is skipping down the roadLittle Red Riding Hood is skipping down the road when she sees the Big Bad Wolf crouched down behind a log. «My what big eyes you have, Mr Wolf», says Little Red Riding Hood. The wolf jumps up and runs away. Further down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again. This time ... Читать далее...
29. Stagecoach surpriseI had a dream the other night. I was in the old West riding in a stagecoach. Suddenly, a man riding a horse pulls up to the left side of the stagecoach, and a riderless horse pulls up on the right. The man leans down, pulls open the door, and jumps off his horse into ... Читать далее...
30. The Missionary and the ChiefA missionary who had spent years showing a tribe of natives how to farm and build things to be self-sufficient gets word that he is to return home. He realizes that the one thing he never taught the natives was how to speak English, so he takes the chief and starts walking in the forest. ... Читать далее...
31. The right rhythmOn hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent’s house to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her. When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, «He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning.» Horrified, Katie told her ... Читать далее...
32. The local courtroom was packed as testimony beganThe local courtroom was packed as testimony began in the sentencing hearing of a woman convicted of murdering her husband of 20 years by poisoning his coffee. The defense attorney knew he had his work cut out for him trying to make his client appear more sympathetic to the Judge, especially since she had been ... Читать далее...
33. A man was riding in the back of his limousineA man was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw a man eating grass by the roadside. He ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. «Why are you eating grass?» he asked the man. «I don’t have any money for food,» the poor man replied. «Oh, please come ... Читать далее...
34. Значение идиомы find[find] or [get one’s bearings] {v. phr.} To know where one is orwhere one is headed. «Without a compass,» the sergeant warned theenlisted men, «you will never find your bearings in the desert.»...
35. Writing a PostcardI was on vacation in Yosemite and I decided to send a Postcard to my friend, Elaine, who was on her own vacation in Europe. … Dear Elaine, I Arrived safely two days ago and I’m Having the time of my life. I met some nice people here and we’ve been Keeping each other company. ... Читать далее...
36. Following a Dress CodeTae: What are you doing? Why are you taking all of my clothes out of my suitcase? I just finished Packing that. Nicole: You’ve packed all of the wrong things. We’re going on a Luxury cruise and all you’ve packed are shorts and t-shirts. Tae: I’m going on vacation and I don’t have To dress ... Читать далее...
37. Диалог на английском языке с переводом «Отпуск во Флориде» (My Vacation in Florida)— Hello, Jane! You look so fresh and sun-tanned. How was your trip to Florida? They say it’s very beautiful there. — Yes, I’ve just come home, Mark. Oh, I don’t even know where to start! My vacation was awesome! I think I had the time of my life! — Who did you go with? ... Читать далее...
38. A blonde went to the appliance store saleA blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. «I would like to buy this TV,» she told the salesman. «Sorry we don’t sell to blondes,» he replied. She hurried home, dyed her hair, came back again and told the salesman, «I would like to buy this TV.» «Sorry we don’t sell ... Читать далее...
39. Bathroom controlOne day Pablo and Paco are riding through the desert on their horses. As they ride along, Pablo smells something horrible. He stops his horse and turns around. He says «Hey Paco, you shit your pants?» Paco says «No, Pablo, I did not shit my pants.» He believes him and they keep riding. As they ... Читать далее...
40. A man is driving down the freewayA man is driving down the freeway when he sees a sign that says; «Get gas and free sex here». So obviously the guy was interested, so he stopped, filled up went inside to pay. «Pick a number from 1 — 10 to get free sex.» said the cashier. «Uh, okay, 3!» the man replied. ... Читать далее...