• A Scottish private walks into the pharmacy

    A Scottish private walks into the pharmacy near his bases, pulls a beat-up, mutilated condom out of his pocket, and asks the pharmacist how much it would cost to repair...

  • Eat oysters

    A lady went running to a doctor with a badly spoiled stomach. “What did you eat for dinner last night?” asked the doctor. “Oysters,” she said. “Fresh oysters?” asked the...

  • Marriage quotes 01

    Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence – a life sentence. Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached....

  • The seven kinds of passionate women

    1.The Optimist – “Yes! Yes! Yes!” 2.The Pessimist – “No! No! No!” 3.The Confused – “Yes! No! Yes! No! Yes! Yes! No! No!” 4.The Asthmatic – written rendition of gasping...

  • The three survivors of the shipwreck

    The three survivors of the shipwreck were being driven mad by hunger. The Irishman, an expert navigator, told the others that if they could row the lifeboat for three more...

  • A guy in a bar

    The bartender asks him “What’ll you have?”. The guy answers, “A scotch, please”. The bartender hands him the drink, and says “That’ll be five dollars”, to which he replies “What...

  • He is extremely drunk

    Late one Friday night the policeman spotted a man driving very erratically through the streets of Dublin. They pulled the man over and asked him if he had been drinking...

  • A clear moral

    One day at the end of class little Billy’s teacher has the class go home and think of a story and then conclude the moral of that story. The following...

  • An Amazing Talking Dog

    A man and his dog walk into a bar. The man proclaims, “I’ll bet you a round of drinks that my dog can talk.” Bartender: “Yeah! Sure…go ahead.” Man: “What...

  • A man enters a barber shop for a shave

    A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks. “I...

  • Kiss meyeah!

    “Kiss me,” said the young lady urgently. “Please kiss me.” But the young man turned his head away, saying, “Of course not. How can I? I’m your own brother-in-law. Hell,...

  • Diary Entries

    AUG. 12 Moved to our new home in Ohio. It is so beautiful here. The hills are so majestic. I can hardly wait to see them with snow covering them....

  • A Negro was travelling in china

    A negro was travelling in china. In a remote village, he came upon an elderly chinaman skipping stones across a lake. At each bounce of the stone off the water,...

  • Three different kinds of sex

    Did you know that once you get married, you can look forward to three different kinds of sex? First, there’s House Sex: That’s when you make love all over the...

  • A man sat quietly reading his morning paper

    A man sat quietly reading his morning paper one Sunday morning. Suddenly, he is knocked almost senseless by his wife, who stands behind him holding a frying pan in hand....