Chem one-liners 03

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1. Chem one-liners 02Q: How many physical chemists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Only one, but he’ll change it three times, plot a straight line through the data, and then extrapolate to zero concentration. «A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold.» Isaac Asimov said that if you want to ... Читать далее...
2. Chem one-liners 01Organic chemistry is the chemistry of carbon compounds. Biochemistry is the study of carbon compounds that crawl. — Mike Adams Chemicals: Noxious substances from which modern foods are made. Remember, if you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate! There is the joke about the homeopath who forgot to take his medicine ... Читать далее...
3. Chem one-liners 04Q: What kind of ghosts haunt chemistry faculties? A: Methylated Spirits! Q: How many atoms in a guacamole? A:Avocado’s number. Q: What do chemists use to make guacomole? A: Avogadros. Free radicals have revolutionized chemistry. These were printed on bumper stickers and given out at an American Chemical Society meeting 10 or 12 years ago: ... Читать далее...
4. Перевод слова cubeCube — куб, кусочек Перевод слова Ice cube — кусочек льда cube of a number — куб числа cube sugar — пиленый сахар 4 Cubed is 64. 4 в кубе равно 64. Cut the meat into small Cubes. Мясо нарезать мелкими кубиками. A Cube has six sides. У куба шесть граней....
5. Перевод слова formulaFormula — формула, рецепт Перевод слова Chemical formula — химическая формула a legal formula — юридическая формулировка patented formula — запатентованный рецепт the formula of faith — догмат веры There’s no Formula for a happy marriage. Рецепта счастливого брака не существует. The Formula for water is H2O. Формула воды Н2О. This has proven to be ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова chemistChemist — химик, фармацевт Перевод слова Food chemist — химик-пищевик cereal chemist — специалист по биохимии зерна assistant chemist — лаборант chemist engineer — инженер-химик She had been in the afternoon to the Chemist’s to buy some junior aspirin. Во второй половине дня она пошла в аптеку купить детский аспирин. The Chemist evaporated the water. ... Читать далее...
7. Перевод слова combineCombine — объединять, сочетать, смешивать Перевод слова To combine forces — объединить силы to combine harshness and softness — сочетать грубость и мягкость to combine theory and practice — объединять теорию и практику Oil and water do not Combine. Масло и вода не смешиваются. This chemical Combines with air to form a liquid. Данное химическое ... Читать далее...
8. Little Johnny goes into a pharmacy and asksLittle Johnny goes into a pharmacy and asks the chemist for some rubbers. The chemist puts a pack of rubbers on the counter. Johnny looks at the rubbers and asks the chemist if he has any other kind. The chemist goes into the back and brings out another pack. «Nah,» says Johnny, «what else do ... Читать далее...
9. Acronyms for ClintonClinton: (C)razed (L)ow-class (I)diot (N)ow (T)aking (O)ver (N)ation Clinton: (C)razy (L)iberal (I)ntent (O)n (N)eedlessly (T)rashing (O)ur (N)ation Clinton: (C)learly (L)oose (I)nternal (N)avigation (T)echniques (O)ccupy (N)ever-Neverland Clinton: (C)ompulsive (L)iar (I)s (N)ation’s (T)op (O)fficial (N)ow Clinton: (C)omplete (L)oser (I)n (N)ow (T)errorizing (O)ur (N)ation Hillary: (H)ighly (I)nexperienced (L)eft-liberal (A)cademic (R)ighteous (Y)uppies Gore: (G)ennifer’s (O)nly (R)emaining (E)nterprise Gore: (G)reatly ... Читать далее...
10. The definition of a phallic symbolThis girl walks in to a doctors office and she asks «Whats a failic symbol? Doctor says «you’re kidding..» Girl says «no! I don’t know! Whats a failic symbol???» Doctor pulls his pants and underwear down and says «You see? This is a failic symbol!» Girl says «Oh! Its just like a penis, only smaller»...
11. A hungry lion was roaming through the jungleA hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat. He came across two men. One was sitting under a tree and reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle ... Читать далее...
12. One liners about foodThe snack bar next door to an atom smasher was called «The Fission Chips.» On April Fools Day, a mother put a fire cracker under the pancakes. She blew her stack. A new chef from India was fired a week after starting the job. He keep favoring curry. A couple of kids tried using pickles ... Читать далее...
13. Business one-liners 02A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours. — Milton Berle A committee is twelve men doing the work of one. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking. A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually. — Abba Eban A conservative is ... Читать далее...
14. The math one linersMath problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)^2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x]. If parallel lines meet at infinity — infinity must be a very noisy place with all those lines crashing together! Maths Teacher: Now suppose the number of sheep is x… Student: Yes sir, but what happens if the number of sheep is not x? Zenophobia: the irrational fear of convergent sequences. ... Читать далее...
15. Business one-liners 01A President of a democracy is a man who is always ready, willing, and able to lay down your life for his country. A backscratcher will always find new itches; a brown-noser will always find new sense. A bad day fishing is better than a good day at work. A bird in the bush usually ... Читать далее...
16. Bill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunchBill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunch. As they read the menu the waitress comes over and askes Clinton, «Are you ready to order?» Clinton replies, «Yes, I’d like a quickie.» «A quickie?!?» the waitress replies. «Sir, given the current situation of your personal life I don’t think that is ... Читать далее...
17. Books in Our Life«Books and friends should be few but good,» says an English proverb. «Except a living man there is nothing more wonderful than a book! They teach us and open their hearts to us as brothers,» wrote Charles Kingsley, an English writer of the 19th century. The book is certainly one of the greatest human inventions. ... Читать далее...
18. Books in my life (3)There is an English proverb that says, «Books and friends should be few but good». And «Except a living man there is nothing more wonderful than a book!» I totally agree with it. Any book is a wonderful thing! Just imagine – it may seem that it’s just paper pages with a cover and letters ... Читать далее...
19. Chemist’s last wordsThe last words of a chemist: 1. And now the tasting test. 2. May that become hot? 3. And now a little bit from this… 4. … and please keep that test tube alone! 5. And now shake it a bit. 6. Why is there no label on this bottle? 7. In which glass was ... Читать далее...
20. Types of PantsJosh: We are going to get you out of those Baggy sweatpants and into some pants that fit. Kayla: I don’t like pants that are too Formfitting. Josh: I’m not suggesting you buy Skintight leggings, but some nice Slacks would be Slimming. Kayla: I like pants with an Elastic waistband. They’re more comfortable. Josh: Just ... Читать далее...
21. Types of PantsJosh: We are going to get you out of those Baggy sweatpants and into some pants that fit. Kayla: I don’t like pants that are too Formfitting. Josh: I’m not suggesting you buy Skintight leggings, but some nice Slacks would be Slimming. Kayla: I like pants with an Elastic waistband. They’re more comfortable. Josh: Just ... Читать далее...
22. Значение идиомы water[water] See: BLOOD IS THICKER THAN WATER, COME HELL OR HIGH WATER, DEEP WATER, FISH OUT OF WATER, GO THROUGH HELL AND HIGH WATER, HEADABOVE WATER, HOLD WATER, HELL AND HIGH WATER, HOT WATER, LIKE WATER, LIKE WATER OFF A DUCK’S BACK, MAKE ONE’S MOUTH WATER, OF THE FIRSTWATER, POUR OIL ON TROUBLED WATERS, THROW ... Читать далее...
23. Books in my life — Книги в моей жизниContemporary life is impossible without reading. The influence of literature on people’s mind is great. Regular reading enriches your knowledge of the world and helps to form your entire personality. If a book appeals to you, it arouses lots of feelings and emotions in your heart. If you take to reading, the world of other ... Читать далее...
24. BooksТопик Книги рассказывает, насколько важно чтение книг. Люди читают не только для развлечения, при чтении книг мышление человека задействовано полностью, если мы, например, сопереживаем героям и их жизнь вызывает много чувств и эмоций. Чтение книг полностью захватывает внимание и развивает наш кругозор. Contemporary life is impossible without reading. The influence of literature on people’s mind ... Читать далее...
25. Having the equipmentA couple went on vacation to a resort up north. The husband liked to fish, and the wife liked to read. One morning the husband came back from fishing after getting up real early that morning and took a nap. While he slept, the wife decided to take the boat out. She was not familiar ... Читать далее...
26. Значение идиомы nose in a book[nose in a book] {n. phr.} Busy interest in reading. — Used with apossessive. Mother can’t get Mary to help do the housework; shealways has her nose in a book....
27. Elephants IXEvery nation has to write a book about the Elephant: The French book — The Sex Life of the Elephant or: 1000 ways to cook Elephant The English book — Elephants I have shot on Safari The Welsh book — The Elephant and its influence on Welsh language and culture or: Oes ysgol tocynnau eleffant ... Читать далее...
28. Перевод слова readingReading — чтение, начитанность Перевод слова To teach reading and writing — обучать чтению и письму a man of wide reading — эрудит, весьма начитанный человек readings from Shakespeare — исполнение чтецом отрывков из произведений Шекспира reading glasses — очки для чтения I need glasses for Reading. Для чтения мне нужны очки. Reading makes my ... Читать далее...
29. US Attorney General John Ashcroft was visiting an elementary schoolUS Attorney General John Ashcroft was visiting an elementary school. After fifteen minutes speaking he says: ‘I will now answer any questions you have.’ Bobby stands up and says: ‘I have four questions’: 1. How did Bush win the election with fewer votes than Gore? 2. Why haven’t you caught Osama bin Laden? 3. Why ... Читать далее...
30. Перевод слова reading-roomReading-room — читальный зал, читальня Перевод слова Village reading room — изба-читальня public reading room — публичный читальный зал village library and reading room — изба-читальня She never left the Reading room unlocked. Она никогда не оставляла открытым читальный зал. I needed to clear the Reading room for Anzac Day. Мне нужно убрать читальный зал ... Читать далее...
31. The Road to HeavenA man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead. He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them. After a while, they came to ... Читать далее...
32. Reading MagazinesI’m The first to admit that I’m Hooked on reading magazines. I’ve been this way As long as I can remember. I love picking up magazines about different topics. Currently, I Subscribe to about six or seven magazines, although when I was getting Professional journals during my days at the university, I probably had 15 ... Читать далее...
33. Pyotr KapitsaP. Kapitsa, an outstanding Soviet physicist, was born in Kronstadt in the family of a general in 1894. He graduated from the Petrograd Polytechnic Institute in 1919. Kapitsa took a great interest in physics while still at the institute. In 1921 Kapitsa was sent to England on Lenin’s instructions to renew scientific contacts. He worked ... Читать далее...
34. Фразовый глагол run for — перевод и значение, пример использованияФразовый глагол: run for Перевод: баллотироваться на выборах на какую-либо позицию Пример: Gore is running for president of the U. S. A. Гор баллотируется в президенты США....
35. Перевод слова meterMeter — счетчик; метр Перевод слова Meter reading — показание прибора meter panel — панель с контрольно-измерительными приборами meter of water column — метр водяного столба The Meter is a measure of length. Метр — это единица длины. He could not believe the Meter reading. Он не мог поверить в Показания счетчика. A man came ... Читать далее...
36. Перевод слова bookBook — книга; бронировать Перевод слова Picture book — книжка с картинками all seats are booked — все билеты проданы rare book — редкая книга He is an open Book. Его легко понять. I’ll Book you in at the Hilton. Я забронирую Вам номер в отеле Hilton. Take this Book too. Возьмите и эту книгу....
37. Перевод слова waterWater — вода Перевод слова Water bill — счет за воду water birds — водоплавающие птицы to re-water car — пополнять запасы воды в вагоне The Water is real warm. Вода действительно теплая. His eyes Watered. Его глаза слезились. Can I have some Water? Можно мне немного воды?...
38. Reading Comic BooksLee: What are you reading? Stan: It’s a Graphic novel. Lee: Graphic novel? You mean a Comic book? I thought you were too old for that sort of thing. Stan: For your information, this is a graphic novel and it’s a Literary art form. Graphic novels are written for Mature audiences, not kids. Lee: Really? ... Читать далее...
39. There was a gorilla sitting in a tree by a riverThere was a gorilla sitting in a tree by a river, when a lion came by for a cool drink. The gorilla thought to himself, «How funny would it be to screw the king of the jungle in the ass?» After a moment or two, the gorilla swung into action. He grabbed the lion and ... Читать далее...
40. A woman had some problems, so she went to her doctorA woman had some problems, so she went to her doctor of twenty years. They had the following conversation: Dr.: Take the red pill after breakfast with one glass of water. Woman: Ok. Dr: Take the blue pill after lunch with two glasses of water. Woman: Ok. Dr.: Take the yellow pill after dinner with ... Читать далее...