A lady was in a hardware store looking at

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1. A woman asks the hardware store clerk«Do you have any batteries?» a woman asks the hardware store clerk. «Yes, m’am.» The clerk gestures with his finger. «Can you come this way?» «If I could come that way,» the woman says, «I wouldn’t need the batteries.»...
2. Перевод слова hardwareHardware — оборудование, аппаратура Перевод слова Hardware engineer — специалист по ЭВМ, электронщик piece of hardware — элемент конструкции hardware constraints — аппаратные ограничения They carried a vast inventory of Hardware. Они несли огромный запас оборудования. Computer Hardware becomes obsolete quickly. Компьютерное оборудование быстро устаревает. The Hardware store offers several different glues. Магазин бытовой техники ... Читать далее...
3. I’ll use my Seeing Eye DogA blind man with a seeing eye dog at his side walks into a grocery store. The man walks to the middle of the store, picks up the dog by the tail, and starts swinging the dog around in circles over his head. The store manager, who has seen all this, thinks this is quite ... Читать далее...
4. This old lady walks out of the grocery store and goes to the bus stopThis old lady walks out of the grocery store and goes to the bus stop. An old guy is sitting in the parking lot in his car. He drives over and says he’ll give her a ride home. On the way he looks her over and says «You’re a pretty good looking old broad. I’ll ... Читать далее...
5. The young lady admired the watch in the store windowThe young lady admired the watch in the store window every time she walked by it. She finally entered the shop one day and said, «Just how much is that watch?» «It’s $2000, ma’am.» «Hmmm. Well, would you consider time payments for it?» «Just what sort of ‘time schedule’ did you have in mind?» «I ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова ladyLady — леди, женщина Перевод слова Great lady — знатная дама you’ve dropped your gloves, lady! — женщина, вы обронили перчатки! foxy lady — соблазнительная женщина your good lady — ваша супруга Shall we rejoin the Ladies? Не вернуться ли нам к дамам? She’s swell, a real Lady. Она одевается стильно, как настоящая леди. Don’t ... Читать далее...
7. A blind man walks into a drug store with his seeing eye dogA blind man walks into a drug store with his seeing eye dog. He takes the dogs leash & starts swinging it around & around his head. The druggist says «May I help you?» The blind man replies «No thank you, I’m just looking around.»...
8. Passing a parrotA lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, «Hey lady, you are really ugly.» Well, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work. On the way home she saw the same ... Читать далее...
9. Перевод слова dropDrop — капля, капать; бросать, ронять, падать Перевод слова Drop in the bucket — капля в море to drop the anchor — бросать якорь to drop one’s purse — обронить кошелек I didn’t spill a Drop. Я не пролил ни капли. The apple Dropped to the ground. Яблоко упало на землю. He Dropped his voice. ... Читать далее...
10. Did you hear about the hillbillyDid you hear about the hillbilly who went into the hardware store to buy a chain saw? He said I want one that will cut down at least 10 trees a day. He was back at the hardware store with the saw a couple days later complaining that it only cut one tree and that ... Читать далее...
11. The handsome American strode into a department store in ParisThe handsome American strode into a department store in Paris, France, and headed straight for the lingerie counter. He intently studied the array of lacy underthings and the sales lady bustled over to him. «Do you have something in mind?» she asked. «I certainly do, ma’am,» the American emphatically replied. «That’s why I want a ... Читать далее...
12. Значение идиомы drop off[drop off] {v.} 1. To take part of the way you are going. Joe asked Mrs. Jones to drop him off at the library on her way downtown. 2. To go to sleep. Jimmy was thinking of his birthday party as he dropped off to sleep. 3. To die. The patient dropped off in his ... Читать далее...
13. A Blind Mans SportA Blind Mans Sport A blind man was describing his favorite sport, parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him: «I am placed in the door and told when to jump» «My hand is placed on my release ring for me, and out I go» «But how ... Читать далее...
14. The first time I went to a drug store to buy condomsThe first time I went to a drug store to buy condoms, I was waited on by a beautiful young woman. She asked what size I wanted and I said I wasn’t sure. So she asked now big I was and I said, «Compared to what?» She held up one finger and asked if I ... Читать далее...
15. An Avon lady was along in an elevator when she suddenlyAn Avon lady was along in an elevator when she suddenly had to fart. She promptly reached into her bag and sprayed the air with her deodorizer. Two floors later a gentleman got onto the elevator. He began to sniff. The Avon lady asked, «Do you smell something?» «Why, yes, I do,» he replied. «What ... Читать далее...
16. A lady from California purchased a piece of timber landA lady from California purchased a piece of timber land in Oregon. There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the tract. She wanted to get a good view of her land so she started to climb the big tree. As she neared the top, she encountered a spotted owl that ... Читать далее...
17. Buying Tools at a Hardware StoreChuck: Just remember that we have a lot to accomplish today, so let’s just get what we need and go, okay? Ayaka: Sure, we just need a few tools for our DIY project. The Power tools are over there. Chuck: Whoa, we’re not getting power tools. We just need a few simple Hand tools: a ... Читать далее...
18. Buying Tools at a Hardware StoreChuck: Just remember that we have a lot to accomplish today, so let’s just get what we need and go, okay? Ayaka: Sure, we just need a few tools for our DIY project. The Power tools are over there. Chuck: Whoa, we’re not getting power tools. We just need a few simple Hand tools: a ... Читать далее...
19. A little old lady gets onto a crowded busA little old lady gets onto a crowded bus and stands in front of a seated young girl. Holding her hand to her chest, she says to the girl, «If you knew what I have, you would give me your seat.» The girl gets up and gives up her the seat to the old lady. ... Читать далее...
20. An old lady lived by herself in a small houseAn old lady lived by herself in a small house in a small town. One day she went to the local grocery store and while she was gone a criminal broke into her house, took her clothes off of the line, smashed the watermellons in her garden, shaved her cat and then left when he ... Читать далее...
21. Значение идиомы drop by[drop by] or [stop by] {v.} 1. or [drop around] To make a short or unplanned visit; go on a call or errand; stop at someone’s home. Drop by any time you’re in town. My sister dropped around last night. Don’t forget to stop by at the gas station. Syn.: DROP IN. 2. or [drop ... Читать далее...
22. A Manager of a retail clothing store is reviewingA Manager of a retail clothing store is reviewing a potential employee’s application and notices that the man has never worked in retail before. He says to the man, «For a man with no experience, you are certainly asking for a high wage.» «Well Sir,» the applicant replies, «the work is so much harder when ... Читать далее...
23. Значение идиомы in store[in store] {adj.} or {adv. phr.} 1. Saved up in case of need; readyfor use or for some purpose. If the electricity goes off, we havecandles in store in the closet. The squirrel has plenty of nuts instore for the winter. Compare: IN RESERVE, IN STOCK, ON HAND. 2.Ready to happen; waiting. — Often used ... Читать далее...
24. Пословица / поговорка a faint heart never won a lady / faint heart never won fair lady — перевод и значение, пример использованияПословица / поговорка: a faint heart never won a lady / faint heart never won fair lady Перевод: робкому сердцу не завоевать прекрасной дамы (т. е. робость мешает успеху) Эквивалент в русском языке: смелость города берет Пример: The man must be more aggressive if he wants to find a girlfriend. He should remember that a ... Читать далее...
25. An old lady owned two monkeysAn old lady owned two monkeys. One day they both died, so she took them to the taxodermist. «So you want them mounted?» asked the taxidermist. To which she replied: «No. Holding hands will do just fine.»...
26. Значение идиомы lady-killer[lady-killer] {n.}, {informal} 1. Any man who has strong sex appealtoward women. Joe is a regular lady-killer. 2. A man whorelentlessly pursues amorous conquests, is successful at it, and thenabandons his heartbroken victims. The legendary Don Juan of Spainis the most famous lady-killer of recorded history. Compare: LADY’SMAN....
27. Перевод слова storeStore — магазин; припасы, снабжать, хранить Перевод слова Clothing store — магазин готового платья war stores — боеприпасы to store a ship with provisions — снабдить судно провиантом facts stored away in the memory — факты, хранимые в памяти What did you get at the toy Store? Что вы купили в магазине игрушек? I need ... Читать далее...
28. Значение идиомы variety store[variety store] {n.} A store that sells many different kinds ofthings, especially items that are fairly small and in everyday use. I went into a variety store and bought some paint. Five-and-tencent stores are a kind of variety store....
29. Значение идиомы drop in[drop in] {v.} To make a short or unplanned visit; pay a call. — Often used with «on». We were just sitting down to dinner when Uncle Willie dropped in. The Smiths dropped in on some old friends on their vacation trip to New York. Syn.: DROP BY, RUN IN....
30. Значение идиомы set store by[set store by] {v. phr.}, {informal} To like or value; want tokeep. Used with a qualifying word between «set» and «store». Georgesets great store by that old tennis racket. Pat doesn’t set muchstore by Mike’s advice....
31. A shapely lady in a bikini walked into the ocean to take a swimA shapely lady in a bikini walked into the ocean to take a swim. A large wave came up and washed over her, tearing off her bikini top. She came out of the surf with her arms folded across her chest. Little Johnny, playing in the sand looked up at her and said, «Lady, if ... Читать далее...
32. There was a little old man who had a bit of a speech impedimentThere was a little old man who had a bit of a speech impediment. One day he went shopping, his first stop was at a hardware store. He went up to the shop assistant and asked «Could I have a fucket please?» The assistant asked»Pardon sir?». «Can I have a fucket please?» Replied the man. ... Читать далее...
33. The crowded storeIt was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30, the store’s opening time, in front of the store. A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be ... Читать далее...
34. Going to a Home Improvement StorePaige: I think we can get everything we need To fix up the house in one trip. What do you think? Vern: We can try. It seems like everybody had the same thought when they woke up this morning: Go to the Home improvement store! Paige: Yeah, it’s a little crowded, but I still think ... Читать далее...
35. Going to a Home Improvement StorePaige: I think we can get everything we need To fix up the house in one trip. What do you think? Vern: We can try. It seems like everybody had the same thought when they woke up this morning: Go to the Home improvement store! Paige: Yeah, it’s a little crowded, but I still think ... Читать далее...
36. A bar nameA guy walks into a store and says to the managaer «why doesn’t your store have a name», the store manager says «I haven’t thought of one yet but I think u can help me, what’s your girlfriend’s name.» The guy says «Jenny» then the store owner says «What’s do you like most about Jenny» ... Читать далее...
37. A young lady asked the Scotsman what he wore under his kiltA young lady asked the Scotsman what he wore under his kilt. «Reach up there and find out.» She did, but quickly pulled her hand back out and said, «Oh, it’s gruesome!» «Aye, it has,» replied the Scotsman, «and if you put your hand back up there, it’ll grow some more!»...
38. Значение идиомы lady’s man[lady’s man] {n.} A man or boy who likes to be with women or girlsvery much and is popular with them. Charlie is quite a lady’s mannow....
39. A young lady walks into a doctors officeA young lady walks into a doctors office. «Doctor I’m suffering from a terrible discharge» The Doctor lays her down lifts up her dress and has a good probe around and says «how does that feel?» Young lady, «Oooh doctor that feels lovely….. …but the discharge is from my ear!!»...
40. A little boy and his dad are standing in lineA little boy and his dad are standing in line at the grocery store behind a big fat lady. The little boy says, «hey dad, look how fat that lady is!» «Shhhh, quiet son, she’ll hear you.» «But dad, look how big and fat that lady is!» «Shhhhhh, don’t say that son, it’s not nice!» ... Читать далее...