A business man from New York decided to quit his job
A business man from New York decided to quit his job and buy a 200 acre spread in Montana. One day while out riding his horse, he came across another man on horseback. The man told him he was his next door neighbor and he was having a get-together the coming weekend. He said: I have to warn you though, there will be alot of drinking at this party. The city slicker said no problem. There will also be sex going on. No problem he responded. Well, There will probably be some fighting too. I think I can handle myself, claimed the new neighbor. As he rode off, he turned and asked the party host. “By the way, what should I wear at the party” The man, responded “Oh, it don’t matter, It’s only going to be me and you!”
Sent by Chris
(1 оценок, среднее: 5.00 из 5)
Related topics:
- Back in the good ole days in Texas Back in the good ole days in Texas, when stage coaches and the like were popular, there were three people in a stage coach one day: a true red blooded born and raised Texas gentleman, a tenderfoot city slicker from back East, and a beautiful and well endowed Texas lady. The city slicker kept eyeing […]...
- A life-long city man, tired of the rat race A life-long city man, tired of the rat race, decided he was going to give up the city life, move to the country, and become a chicken farmer. He found a nice, used chicken farm, which he bought. Turns out that his next door neighbor was also a chicken farmer. The neighbor came for a […]...
- Traditions A man and a woman got married, and he told her : ” since you are my wife you should respect my traditions and habits…and i have 3 traditions. So, first tradition: On wednesdays i play football with my friends…no matter what..whether it snows or it rains…i dont care..i play football!! -Is it clear for […]...
- From the history of New York – Из истории Нью-Йорка The first European explorer who saw Manhattan Island was Giovanni da Verrazano, an Italian merchant who was in the service of the French king, Francis I. The date was April, 1524. Today a bridge which carries his name, the Verrazano-Narrows Bridge, is one of the city’s most impressive sights. It is the longest suspension bridge […]...
- Time to quit As the end of the day drew near, the handsome executive called his newly hired red-headed assistant into his office. “Do you know what time we quit around here?” he asked. “Sure!” the girl nervously giggled. “Whenever somebody knocks on the door.”...
- Перевод слова handle Handle – рукоять, рукоятка, ручка; управлять, регулировать Перевод слова The handle of a knife – черенок ножа the handle of a door – дверная ручка to handle a tractor – управлять трактором to handle troops – командовать войсками I can’t Handle the heat. Не выношу жары. The machine Handles well. Машина работает очень послушно. A […]...
- The Zen Master is visiting New York City The Zen Master is visiting New York City from Tibet. He goes up to a hot dog vendor and says, “Make me one with everything.” The hot dog vendor fixes a hot dog and hands it to the Zen Master, who pays with a $20 bill. The vendor puts the bill in the cash box […]...
- Jokes about Dumb Irishmen The blind farmer was often taken for a walk in the fields by a kind neighbor. However kindly the neighbor might have been, he was undoubtedly a coward. When a bull charged towards them one day, he abandoned the blind man. The bull, puzzled by a lack of fear, nudged the farmer in the back. […]...
- New York Jokes New York: You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An Attorney… – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – […]...
- New York New York is one of the largest cities in the world. Its population is over 11 million people. New York is an industrial and cultural centre of the country. Most business is centred in Manhattan Island. The whole area is very small, that’s why the sky-scrapers were invented in New York and, especially, in Wall […]...
- A German tourist walks into a McDonald’s in New York City A German tourist walks into a McDonald’s in New York City and orders a beer. (In Germany and many parts of Europe, McDonald’s actually does serve beer.) The local guy in the line behind him immediately gives him the jab: “They don’t serve BEER here, you MORON!” The German fellow felt pretty stupid, but suddenly […]...
- This lady who was living in New York City had to get back This lady who was living in New York City had to get back to her old country but she was broke. One day she wandered down to the docks and spotted a worker getting ready to load supplies onto a boat. “Please I need to get back to England” she pleaded. “If you sneak me […]...
- New York (3) New York has always been the gateway to the USA. But it is more than just a door; it is also a window through which the life of the whole nation may be observed. New York is a city of striking social contrasts. New York includes five boroughs: Manhattan, the Bronx, Queens, Brooklyn and Richmond. […]...
- An Unwelcome Business in the Neighborhood Patricia: Finally! That empty building has a new Tenant. That’s great for the neighborhood. Francois: Think again. The new tenant plans to open a Strip club. Patricia: A strip club in the middle of a Residential neighborhood?! That must be a Violation of city Ordinances. The city won’t allow that. Francois: I’m not so sure. […]...
- Достопримечательности Нью-Йорка/ Places of Interest in New York На английском языке Перевод на русский язык Places of Interest in New York Достопримечательности Нью-Йорка New York is not the capital city of the Unites States of America. However, it’s the largest and the most famous city of the country. The city is situated on the east coast of the Atlantic Ocean and consists of […]...
- New York (2) New York is one of the largest cities in the world and the biggest seaport. It’s the financial capital of the country. It’s the business centre of the United States. The city is situated in New York State, at the mouth of the Hudson river. It’s population is over eight million. In early times the […]...
- Fluffy died This guy comes home from work one day to find his dog with the neighbor’s pet rabbit in his mouth. The rabbit is dead and the guy panics. He thinks the neighbor is going to hate him forever, so he takes the dirty, chewed up rabbit into the house and gives it a bath, blow […]...
- Jon left for a two day business trip to Chicago Jon left for a two day business trip to Chicago. He was only a few blocks away from his house when he realized he’d left his plane ticket on top of his dresser. He turned around and headed back to the house. He quietly entered the door, walked into the kitchen. He saw his wife […]...
- Now he’s in trouble A police officer had just pulled a car over. When he walked up to the car a man rolled down the window and said, “what’s the problem officer?” To which the policeman responded, “I stopped you for running that red light behind you.” Just then the man’s wife leaned forward from the driver’s seat and […]...
- Значение идиомы handle to one’s name [handle to one’s name] {n. phr.}, {slang} A special title usedbefore your name. Jim’s father has a handle to his name. He isMajor Watson. Bob came back from the University with a handle tohis name and was called Dr. Jones....
- Перевод слова quit Quit – бросать, освобождаться Перевод слова To quit oneself of fear – избавиться от страха to quit the house – съехать с квартиры, переехать в другое место to quit work when the siren sounds – прекращать работу по сигналу сирены to quit a debt – выплатить долг I Quit school at 16. Я бросил школу […]...
- Good business Dr. Cutter is the local Veterinarian, known for his wry humor. He surpassed himself one summer day when a city dog was brought to him after an encounter with a porcupine. After almost an hour of prying, pulling, cutting and stitching, he returned the dog to its owner, who asked what she owed. “Fifteen dollars, […]...
- Значение идиомы laughing matter [laughing matter] {n.} A funny happening; a silly situation. – Usually used with “no”. John’s failing the test is no laughingmatter! We were amused when our neighbor’s cat had five kittens, but when our own cat had six kittens it was no laughing matter....
- Значение идиомы get down to business [get down to business] or [work] {v. phr.} To start being serious;begin to face a problem to be solved, or a task to be accomplished. Gentlemen, I’m afraid the party is over and we must get down tobusiness....
- Planning a Business Luncheon One of my co-workers, Betty, was Retiring this month after working for the company 23 years. I was put In charge of planning a retirement lunch In her honor at a restaurant nearby. The company was Picking up the tab and it was Up to me to set a day and time. After asking the […]...
- Miles Dobson was away from home on business Miles Dobson was away from home on business in another city. When he called home, his wife told him, “Miles, they had your name in the obits today.” “What! In the obituary column! That’s not only disgraceful but bad journalism. I’ll sue ’em.” “Tell me, Miles,” his wife asked tremulously, “wh…wh…where are you calling from?”...
- Flies A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. “What are you doing?” She asked. “Hunting Flies” He responded. “Oh. Killing any?” She asked. “Yep, 3 males, 2 Females,” he replied. Intrigued, she asked. “How can you tell?” He responded, “3 were on a beer can, 2 were […]...
- Значение идиомы fly off the handle [fly off the handle] {v. phr.}, {informal} To become very angry. John flew off the handle whenever Mary made a mistake. Thechildren’s noise made the man next door fly off the handle. Syn.:LOSE ONE’S TEMPER....
- New York – Нью-Йорк (1) New York is the largest city in the USA and the biggest seaport. It is the business centre of the United States. New York is situated in the mouth of the Hudson river. In comparison with such ancient historical cities as, say, Rome, London, Moscow or Paris, New York is quite young. It was founded […]...
- Fair business Here’s one about the old native American who wanted a loan for $500. The banker pulled out the loan application, “What are you going to do with the money?” “Take jewlery to city and sell it,” was the response. “What have you got for collateral?” “Don’t know collateral.” “Well that’s something of value that would […]...
- Hiring Business Consultants Erica: So your suggestion is to hire outside Consultants to handle the extra work associated with the Expansion. Stefan: I think there are a lot of benefits: we get someone with the right Expertise quickly, we can use him or her As needed, and we can save on employment taxes and Benefits. What’s not to […]...
- Mr. Richman has 3daughters Mr. Richman has 3daughters. Their names are nobody, somebody and crazy. One day nobody and somebody are fighting over a fake eyebrow. Then crazy when to the policeman and she said”Nobody and Somebody are fighting” Then the policeman look at her then he said “What are you talking about?” Then she said again “Nobody and […]...
- Places of Interest in New York – Интересные места Нью-Йорка Although New York is not the capital of the United States, it is the biggest and most important city and seaport of the country. New York is situated on the Atlantic coast, in the northeastern part of the country, in the state of New York at the mouth of the deep Hudson River, one of […]...
- Нью-Йорк. Достопримечательности/ New York. Sights Нью-Йорк. Достопримечательности New York. Sights Нью-Йорк имеет глобальное влияние на мировую торговлю, технику, образование, искусство, средства массовой информации и другие сферы. Это самый крупный и густонаселенный город США. Территория города разделена на пять районов: Бруклин, Манхэттен, Бронкс, Квинс и Стейтен-Айленд. Первое название города было Новый Амстердам, потому что он был заселен голландскими колонистами. В город […]...
- New York – Нью-Йорк (3) New York is the biggest city in the USA and one of the largest cities of the World* The population of this city is near 12 million people. It is the capital of New York State. There are 5 boroughs in New York – Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, the Bronx, and Staten Island or Richmond. Brooklyn […]...
- Перевод идиомы none of someone’s business / nobody’s business, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: none of someone’s business / nobody’s business Перевод: дело, которое никого не касается, которое никого не должно волновать Пример: My personal financial situation is none of my friend’s business. Моя ситуация в финансовом плане не должна волновать моего друга....
- A Trip to New York City (The phone rings.) Lucy: Hello. Jeff: Hey Lucy, it’s Jeff. Lucy: Hey, welcome back. How was your vacation? Jeff: Oh, it was great. The seven days in New York was a Blast. Lucy: Oh, yeah? Did you do any sightseeing or just visit with friends? Jeff: I got to do both, actually. First, I saw […]...
- A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher’s prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher only wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull. The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace […]...
- Bad Bernie was in prison for seven years Bad Bernie was in prison for seven years. The day he got out, his wife and son were there to pick him up. He came through the gates and got into the car. The only thing he said was, “F. F.” His wife turned to him and answered, “E. F.” Out on the highway, he […]...
- Перевод идиомы fly off the handle, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: fly off the handle Идиома: fly off the handle разг. Перевод: выйти из себя, разозлиться; “слететь с катушек” Пример: My friend flew of the handle when he was the bill for the meal. Мой друг вышел из себя, когда увидел счета за еду....