Three newly incarcerated convicts are discussing how they

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1. Перевод слова newly Newly – вновь, заново, по-новому Перевод слова Furniture newly arranged – по-новому расставленная мебель newly arrived – вновь прибывший newly-born child – новорожденный newly married – новобрачный, новобрачная The offices were Newly tabled. В офисах были поставлены новые столы. That grass is Newly seeded, please get off! Газон только что засеяли, пожалуйста, уйдите с него. […]...
2. At a Casino Hanna: Where have you been? I’ve been trying to find you. I just won $80 from this Slot machine. It’s not the Jackpot, but now I’ve Broken even. Tad: That’s really great. Maybe some of your luck will Rub off on me. I’m just about to see what the High rollers are doing. Do you […]...
3. The newly married man came home from work The newly married man came home from work to find his new bride stretched languorously on the sofa, dressed in a negligee. “Guess what I got planned for dinner?” she asked seductively. “And don’t you dare tell me you had it for lunch today.”...
4. The newly divorced woman The newly divorced woman had never had to be the handyman around the house before, and quickly discovered she was lacking most of the proper tools to do the odd jobs needed. She made a trip to the local hardware store and quickly learned that it was truly a “man’s world” there. Thinking that she […]...
5. Перевод слова deck Deck – палуба, настил; колода карт Перевод слова To swab a deck – драить палубу to cut a deck – снимать колоду to shuffle a deck – тасовать карты Let’s go up on Deck. Давайте поднимемся на палубу. Peter stayed below Deck. Питер остался на нижней палубе. The other players accused him of stacking the […]...
6. Better than Sex A solider stationed in the South Pacific wrote to his wife in the States to please send him a harmonica to occupy his free time and keep his mind off of the local women. The wife complied and sent the best one she could find, along with several dozen lesson & music books. Rotated back […]...
7. Значение идиомы play one’s cards right [play one’s cards right] or [play one’s cards well] {v. phr.},{informal} To use abilities and opportunities so as to be successful;act cleverly; make the best use of your place or skills. Thatmillionaire started with very little but showed a skill in playing hiscards right. People liked Harold, and he played his cards well – and […]...
8. Little Johnny had become a real nuisance Little Johnny had become a real nuisance while his father tried to concentrate on his Saturday afternoon poker game with friends and relatives. His father tried every way possible to get Johnny to occupy himself…television, ice cream, homework, video games…but the youngster insisted on running back and forth behind the players and calling out the […]...
9. Значение идиомы card [card] See: CREDIT CARD, FLASH CARD, HOUSE OF CARDS, IN THE CARDS or ON THE CARDS, LAY ONE’S CARDS ON THE TABLE, PLAY ONE’S CARDS RIGHT, PUT ONE’S CARDS ON THE TABLE, STACK THE CARDS, TRUMP CARD....
10. A young woman stops into her local pharmacy to pick a supply A young woman stops into her local pharmacy to pick a supply of tampons for herself. She goes to the aisle where they are located and sees they are priced at five boxes for one dollar. Thinking this is a misprint; she finds a clerk and asks if this can possibly be the correct price. […]...
11. Значение идиомы on deck [on deck] {adv.} or {adj. phr.} 1. On a floor of a ship open to theoutdoors. The passengers were playing shufflehoard on deck. Thesailors kept busy cleaning and painting on deck. 2. {informal} Readyto do something; present. The scout leader told the boys to be ondeck at 8:00 Saturday morning for the hike. Dick was […]...
12. Two priests and a rabbi were discussing what portion of the Two priests and a rabbi were discussing what portion of the weekly collection they kept for themselves. The first priest explained that he drew a circle on the ground, stepped a few paces back and pitched the money towards the circle. What landed in the circle he kept and what landed outside the circle god […]...
13. Traditions A man and a woman got married, and he told her : ” since you are my wife you should respect my traditions and habits…and i have 3 traditions. So, first tradition: On wednesdays i play football with my friends…no matter what..whether it snows or it rains…i dont care..i play football!! -Is it clear for […]...
14. Перевод слова play Play – играть, игра Перевод слова To play billiards – играть в бильярд to play cards – играть в карты play of chance – игра случая to play chords – играть аккорды Let’s Play cards. Давайте играть в карты. On weekends I Play. По выходным я играю. We Play on the varsity. Мы играем за […]...
15. Visiting a Ranch Piero: What’s all this? Annie: I’m visiting my sister and brother-in-law’s new Ranch next month and I’m getting ready for it. I know I’m a city girl, but I plan To fit right in On that ranch and work Alongside all of the other cowboys. Piero: Well, you Look the part. You’ve got your Cowboy […]...
16. A blonde named Vikki decides she wants to try A blonde named Vikki decides she wants to try horseback riding one day. So Vikki mounts the horse, taps its butt, and the horse starts to take off at a reasonable speed. She is having fun, and decides she wants to go a little faster, so she kicks the horses butt, and the horse goes […]...
17. A business man from New York decided to quit his job A business man from New York decided to quit his job and buy a 200 acre spread in Montana. One day while out riding his horse, he came across another man on horseback. The man told him he was his next door neighbor and he was having a get-together the coming weekend. He said: I […]...
18. Перевод слова favorite Favorite – любимый, излюбленный Перевод слова Dial your favorite program – найди свою любимую программу favorite diversion – любимое развлечение favorite menu options – наиболее часто используемые разделы меню Her Favorite color is blue. Ее любимый цвет – голубой. July is my Favorite month. Июль – это мой любимый месяц. He put $20 on the […]...
19. Newly issued alcohol warnings The Toronto Board of Health has proposed that warning signs be placed on all alcohol bottles to tip off drinkers about the possible peril of drinking a pint or two of any alcoholic beverage. 1. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to wake up with a breath that could knock a buzzard off a […]...
20. Discussing a Victory or Loss Yolanda: Did you see the game last night? Bob: You mean the Crushing victory of my team over yours? Yolanda: That’s not how I would Characterize it. We Fell short in the final seconds, but we played a good game Up until then. Bob: In your dreams. My team Dominated from beginning to end. You’re […]...
21. Little Red Riding Hood is skipping down the road Little Red Riding Hood is skipping down the road when she sees the Big Bad Wolf crouched down behind a log. “My what big eyes you have, Mr Wolf”, says Little Red Riding Hood. The wolf jumps up and runs away. Further down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again. This time […]...
22. I wrote it! There was this guy walking down the road when he noticed a night club ahead. He went in, went up to the bar and asked for a drink. The bar owner, who was tending bar, said, “I’ve never seen you in her before.” The guy says, “Yes, I’m not from around here. I’m just passing […]...
23. Chemistry song 04 Deck the Labs Deck the labs with rubber tubing Fa la la la la, la la la la. Use your funnel and your filter Fa la la la la, la la la la. Don we now our goggles and aprons Fa la la la la, la la la la. Before we go to our lab […]...
24. Outdoor Vacation Sports and Activities Emma: Are you ready? Ricardo: Sure, but why are you dressed like that? I thought we were going to play Golf with Kareem and Karen. Emma: I told them we’re going Rock climbing instead. Ricardo: I was really looking forward to a game of golf. Emma: You play golf all the time. How often do […]...
25. Значение идиомы well [well] See: ALL VERY WELL, AS WELL, AS WELL AS, HAIL FELLOW WELLMET, LET WELL ENOUGH ALONE, PLAY ONE’S CARDS RIGHT or PLAY ONE’S CARDSWELL, VERY WELL, WEAR WELL....
26. A man goes into a bar with his pet octopus A man goes into a bar with his pet octopus and says “I’ll bet $50 that no one here has a musical instrument that this octopus CAN’T play’ The people in the bar look around, and someone fetches out an old guitar. The octopus has a look, picks it up, tunes the string, and starts […]...
27. Two men are discussing the age old question Two men are discussing the age old question: who enjoys sex more, the man or the woman? A woman walks by and listens in for awhile and then interrupts: “Listen you guys. You know when your ear itches and you put in your little finger and wiggle it around for awhile? Afterward, which feels better, […]...
28. Значение идиомы fair play [fair play] {n.} Equal and right action ;justice. The visiting team did not get fair play in the game. The judges decided against Bob, but he said that he had gotten fairplay. Sally’s sense of fair play made her a favorite with herclassmates....
29. Значение идиомы play by ear [play by ear] {v. phr.} 1. To play a musical instrument byremembering the tune, not by reading music. Mary does not know howto read music. She plays the piano by ear. Joe doesn’t need anymusic sheets when he plays his guitar; he knows many songs well andcan play them by ear. 2. {informal} To decide […]...
30. Значение идиомы lay one’s cards on the table [lay one’s cards on the table] or [lay down one’s cards] or [putone’s cards on the table] {v. phr.}, {informal} To let someone knowyour position and interest openly; deal honestly; act without trickeryor secrets. In talking about buying the property, Peterson laid hiscards on the table about his plans for it. Some of the graduatesof […]...
31. Two men are discussing their lives Two men are discussing their lives. One says, “I’m getting married. I’m tired of a messy apartment, dirty dishes, and no clothes to wear.” The other one says, “I’m getting divorced for the same reasons.”...
32. Three guys are discussing women Three guys are discussing women. “I like to watch a woman’s tits best,” the first guy says. The second says “I like to look at a woman’s ass.” He asks the third guy “What about you?”. “Me? I prefer to see the top of her head.”...
33. Значение идиомы in the cards [in the cards] also [on the cards] {adj. phr.}, {informal} To beexpected; likely to happen; foreseeable; predictable. It was in thecards for the son to succeed his father as head of the business. John finally decided that it wasn’t in the cards for him to succeedwith that company....
34. A blonde decides to try horseback riding A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and then horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse’s mane, […]...
35. Judi and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends Judi and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends. Brunette: Last night I had *three* orgasms in a row! Judi: That’s nothing; last night I had over a hundred. Brunette: My god! I had no idea he was that good. Judi: (looking shocked) Oh, you mean with one guy....
36. Two buddies were sharing drinks while discussing their wives Two buddies were sharing drinks while discussing their wives. “Does your wife ever… well, you know… does she… well, let you do it doggie style?” asked one of the two. “Well, not exactly,” his friend replied, “She’s into the dog trick aspect of it.” “Oh, I see. Kinky stuff, huh?” “Well… not exactly. More like […]...
37. Two guys were discussing popular family trends Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and values. Stu said, “I didn’t sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?” Leroy replied, “I’m not sure, What was her maiden name?”...
38. Three Irish women were discussing their respective mates Could this herald the return of our resident wise man, Cunning Lin Gus? Three Irish women were discussing their respective mates over tea. “I call my man ‘Eight,’ ” said the first woman, “Because he’s got eight inches, and we do it eight times a day.” The second woman said in response, “I call my […]...
39. Two Polish guys are discussing one’s upcoming wedding Two Polish guys are discussing one’s upcoming wedding… “I’m not sure if my future bride is a virgin or not.” His buddy replies, “Oh, there’s an easy test for that. All you need is some red paint, some blue paint and a shovel. You paint one ball red and one ball blue. On your honeymoon, […]...
40. Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the woods Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the woods on her way to visit her grandmother, when suddenly The Big Bad Wolf jumped out from behind a tree. “Ah-ha….,” The Big Bad Wolf said, “Now I’ve got you and I’m going to eat you! EAT! EAT! EAT!…” Little Red Riding Hood said angrily, “Damn it, […]...