Ultra dumb people 01

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1. Ultra dumb people 02A man walked in to a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Shop, and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him. In Ohio, an unidentified man in his ... Читать далее...
2. Перевод слова dumbDumb — немой, бессловесный, глупый Перевод слова Dumb crambo — шарада-пантомима deaf and dumb from birth — глухонемой от рождения dumb brutes — бессловесные твари dumb bunny — глупец, дурак He’s kinda Dumb, isn’t he? Он отчасти глуповат, не так ли? What a Dumb question. Что за тупой вопрос. I was struck Dumb with astonishment ... Читать далее...
3. Значение идиомы fire[fire] See: BALL OF FIRE, BETWEEN THE DEVIL AND THE DEEP BLUE SEAor BETWEEN TWO FIRES, BUILD A FIRE UNDER, BURNT CHILD DREADS THE FIRE, CATCH FIRE, DRAW FIRE, FAT’S IN THE FIRE, FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE, HANGFIRE, HEAP COALS OF FIRE ON ONE’S HEAD, HOLD ONE’S FIRE or HOLD FIRE, IRON IN THE FIRE, ... Читать далее...
4. Перевод сленгового выражения dumb bunny, значение и пример использованияСленговое выражение: dumb bunny Перевод: простофиля; глуповатый человек Пример: He really is a dumb bunny. I can’t believe that he can do such stupid things. Он действительно простофиля. Не могу поверить, что он совершает такие глупые поступки....
5. Перевод идиомы play dumb / play ignorant, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: play dumb / play ignorant Перевод: притворяться, делать вид, что не знать чего-либо; прикидываться «дурачком» Пример: I played dumb when my boss asked me if I knew about the problems with the telephone. Я сделал вид, что ничего не знаю, когда начальник спросил меня о проблемах с телефоном....
6. Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826)Thomas Jefferson, one of the American Presidents of the past, wasborn in Virginia in 1743. When he was 14 years old, his fatherdied and the young boy was left to choose for himself what to do. Jefferson studied literature and languages. He also studied to bea lawyer, and later he wrote many of the Virginia ... Читать далее...
7. Repairing an ApplianceVirginia: Hand me that screwdriver, will you? Alonso: Don’t tell me you’re trying To fix that dryer yourself. We need to call in an Authorized repairman or repairwoman. Virginia: Do you have any idea what they’ll Charge? Alonso: All right, then I’ll call a Handyman and see if he knows anything about fixing dryers. Virginia: ... Читать далее...
8. Перевод слова classmateClassmate — одноклассник, сокурсник Перевод слова He is a classmate of mine — мы с ним учимся в одном классе He plagiarized a Classmate’s report. Он списал отчет одноклассника. The children mocked their handicapped Classmate. Дети издевались над своим одноклассником который был инвалидом. As a college student, he was always willing to help fellow Classmates ... Читать далее...
9. Some of the most tactful people on Earth are EnglishSome of the most tactful people on Earth are English. One office supervisor called a secretary in to give her the bad news that she was being fired. He started the conversation with: «Miss Symthe, I really don’t know how we’re going to get along without you, but starting Monday, we’re going to try....
10. Перевод слова presidentPresident — президент Перевод слова Campaign for the president — кампания кандидата в президенты a consultant to the President on foreign policy — советник президента по внешней политике acting president — временно исполняющий обязанности президента incoming president — вновь избранный президент The President declared war. Президент объявил войну. He could end up as President. Oн ... Читать далее...
11. Famous peopleEugene d’Albert (noted German composer) was married six times. At an evening reception which he attended with his fifth wife shortly after their wedding, he presented the lady to a friend who said politely, «Congratulations, Herr d’Albert; you have rarely introduced me to so charming a wife.» During a visit to America, Winston Churchill was ... Читать далее...
12. Перевод слова policyPolicy — политика, система, методика Перевод слова Carrot-and-stick policy — политика кнута и пряника first-in-first-out policy — очередность обслуживания в порядке поступления employment policy — политика полной занятости to adopt a policy — принимать курс Honesty is the best Policy. Честность — лучшая политика. It was bad Policy to attempt disguise. Притворяться было глупо. The ... Читать далее...
13. Значение идиомы line of fire[line of fire] {n. phr.} The path that something fired or throwntakes. When the bandit and the police began to shoot, John wasalmost in their line of fire. Compare: CROSS FIRE....
14. Nicolas Cage on Turning Down ‘Dumb & Dumber,’ Winning Another Oscar and the Movie that Made Him Change His NameWhile promoting «Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengence,» the actor discussed his former friendship with Jim Carrey, and why he hated making «Fast Times At Ridgemont High.» Nicolas Cage may be known for his tough-guy roles in action films like Face/Off, Gone in Sixty Seconds and National Treasure. But, if things had gone differently, he may ... Читать далее...
15. Getting Access to Important PeopleCamile: That is a really good idea. Nathan: Thanks, but there’s no way I can get past all of the Gatekeepers in this company To get access to the president. He’s the only one who can Green-light a project like this. Camile: Can’t you present it to your boss first? Nathan: If I bring the ... Читать далее...
16. Перевод слова intelligenceIntelligence — интеллект, ум, умственные способности Перевод слова A man of no small intelligence — очень неглупый человек a high order of intelligence — высокий интеллект intelligence test — проверка умственных способностей outstanding intelligence — выдающийся ум It is difficult to quantify Intelligence. Трудно измерить уровень интеллекта. Dolphins show a high level of Intelligence. Дельфины ... Читать далее...
17. Attempts by the dumbSIX DIE TRYING TO SAVE CHICKEN — August 1, 1995 CAIRO, Egypt (AP) — Six people drowned yesterday while trying to rescue a chicken that had fallen into a well in southern Egypt. An 18-year-old farmer was the first to descend into the 60-foot well. He drowned, apparently after an undercurrent in the water pulled ... Читать далее...
18. Stupid people awards 01The Darwin Awards The long awaited 1999 Darwin «Natural Selection» Awards have been released! These awards are given each year to bestow upon (the remains of) that individual, who through single-minded self-sacrifice, has done the most to remove undesirable elements from the human gene pool. Ladies And Gentlemen… (drum roll… and envelope please)… We proudly ... Читать далее...
19. Значение идиомы till the last gun is fired[till the last gun is fired] or [until the last gun is fired] {adv. phr.} Until the end; until everything is finished or decided. Fredalways liked to stay at parties until the last gun was fired. Thecandidate didn’t give up hope of being elected until the last gun wasfired....
20. Virginia JokesVirginia: Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don’t Mix? — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — Virginia: Please don’t confuse us ... Читать далее...
21. Launch the missilesIt’s Friday night and President Bill is working late in the White House. Suddenly the big, red telephone on his desk rings. [President Bill] Hello! Hello! [Voice on the line] President Bill! We have a report that Boris Yeltsin just ordered the launch of all Russian missiles in a full-scale nuclear attack against the United ... Читать далее...
22. In the War Between Sharks and People, Humans Are Killing ItA spate of shark attacks off Hawaii raises old fears about the predators of the oceans. But humans are much more dangerous. The media have something in common with sharks: feeding frenzies. On Dec. 2, a kayak fisherman died after being bitten by a shark off the Hawaiian island of Maui. It was the 13th ... Читать далее...
23. Work EnvironmentWork Environment: (Wise manager) + (Wise employee) = PROFIT (Wise manager) + (Dumb employee) = PRODUCTION (Dumb manager) + (Wise employee) = PROMOTION (Dumb manager) + (Dumb employee) = OVERTIME...
24. A blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly beingA blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly being called a dumb blonde. Her friend tells her «go do something to prove them wrong! Why don’t you learn all the state capitals or something?» The blonde thinks this is a great idea, and locks herself up for two weeks studying. The next party she ... Читать далее...
25. A dubious remedyA man was having problems with premature ejaculation so he decided to go to the doctor. He asked the doctor what he could do to cure his problem. In response, the doctor said, «When you feel like you are getting ready to ejaculate, try startling yourself.» That same day the man went to the store ... Читать далее...
26. Education in Australia — Образование в АвстралииThere exists a centralized national system of education in Australia. The top of this system is the Federal Ministry of Education. But there are still many differences in the structure and the curricula of schools in different states. There exist two types of schools in the country: state schools and private schools. Tuition in state ... Читать далее...
27. Three college students were rapping about who they’d like to beThree college students were rapping about who they’d like to be cast off on a desert with. The first one opted for Cindy Crawford. The next one chose Pamela Anderson. The third man chose Virginia Pipeline. «Never heard of her.» his companions protested. «Who is she?» «Why she’s just the greatest Italian gal of all, ... Читать далее...
28. Edgar Allan PoeEdgar Allan Poe, outstanding romantic poet, critic, romancer and short story writer, was one of the first professional writers of the United States. He had a rare talent and in France and Russia of his days he was considered to be the only American poet of significance. Edgar Poe was born in Boston (Massachusetts) in ... Читать далее...
29. Seeing an Eye DoctorI’ve been getting a lot of headaches the past few weeks and my co-worker suggested I go see an Optometrist. Dr. Olho: Okay, let’s take a look. Do you wear Glasses or Contacts? Virginia: I used to, but I had Laser eye surgery three years ago and I don’t wear them anymore. Dr. Olho: I ... Читать далее...
30. A dyslexic nurseTwo doctors were in a hospital hallway one day complaining about Nurse Jenny. «She’s incredibly dumb. She does everything absolutely backwards.» said one doctor. «Just last week, I told her to give a patient 2 milligrams of percocet every 10 hours. She gave him 10 milligrams every 2 hours. He nearly died on us!» The ... Читать далее...
31. Dumb intercourse«Information. Can I help you?» «I’d like the number of the Theater Guild, please.» «One moment, please.» Pause. «I’m sorry sir, I have no listing for a Theodore Guild.» «No, no. It isn’t a person. It’s an organization. It’s Theater Guild.» «I told you, sir. I have no listing for a Theodore Guild.» «Not *Theodore*! ... Читать далее...
32. Dumb Intercourse II«Information? I need the number of the Caseway Insurance Company.» «Would you spell that, please?» «Certainly. C as in sea. A as in aye. S as in sea. E as in eye. W as in why. A as in are. Y as in you.» The operator pauses. «Just a minute, sir. I’ll connect you with ... Читать далее...
33. Blondes dumb?!?!?After many hours of extremely acrobatic and exhausting sex with a blonde he had just picked up, a man goes into the kitchen for some food to replenish his justspent energy. He pours himself a glass of milk and right before drinking it, he realizes his manhood is still pretty hot, so he sticks it ... Читать далее...
34. Stupid people storiesIDIOTS & RETAIL I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was ... Читать далее...
35. The Higher Organs of Power in the USABy the US Constitution the government of the nation is entrusted to three separate authorities: the Executive, the Legislative and the Judicial. The executive power is vested in the President, who holds his office during the term of four years, and is elected together with the Vice-President. Among the duties and powers of the President ... Читать далее...
36. Humor about Dumb IrishmenThe local District Judge had given the defendant a lecture on the evils of drink. But in view of the fact that this was the first time the man had been drunk and incapable, the case was dismissed on payment of ten shillings costs. «Now don’t let me ever see your face again,» said the ... Читать далее...
37. Jokes about Dumb IrishmenThe blind farmer was often taken for a walk in the fields by a kind neighbor. However kindly the neighbor might have been, he was undoubtedly a coward. When a bull charged towards them one day, he abandoned the blind man. The bull, puzzled by a lack of fear, nudged the farmer in the back. ... Читать далее...
38. Truly stupid people 01A man buys a brand new Grand Cherokee for $30,000+, and has $400.00+ in monthly payments. He’s pretty proud of this rig and gets ahold of his friend to do some male bonding with the new ride. They go duck hunting and of course all the lakes are frozen. These two Atomic Brains go to ... Читать далее...
39. There were two people having sex in a carThere were two people having sex in a car. They finished up and the guy thew the comdom out the window. His girlfriend got mad at him she wanted to go again. So he got out of the car and went to find the condom. He found that a little boy had found it and ... Читать далее...
40. The company president called the chief security guardThe company president called the chief security guard into his office. «Chuck, we’ve received a complaint from one of the employees that you are making obscene sexual comments and putting your hands where they don’t belong. These unwanted advances will have to stop.» Chuck looked down at his feet and mumbled, «I’m sorry, Sir. I ... Читать далее...