The new metro cop pulled a speeder who was

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1. Handling a Traffic StopI was having a great day until I saw the police car behind me with its loud Siren and lights Flashing. I Pulled off the road and waited for the officer to approach my car. Officer: May I see your Driver’s license, proof of insurance, and Car registration, please? Lindsay: Let me get them out ... Читать далее...
2. Getting a Traffic TicketI was driving down the street when I saw a Police car behind me. Suddenly, it turned on its Siren. I realized that I was Being pulled over. Officer: Can I see your Driver’s license, Registration, and Proof of insurance? Ray: Sure. Here you are, officer. Officer: Did you know that you were Speeding? You ... Читать далее...
3. They are stopped by the policeJohn & Jessica were on their way home from the bar one night and John got pulled over by the police. The officer told John that he was stopped because his tail light was burned out. John said, «I’m very sorry officer, I didn’t realize it was out, I’ll get it fixed right away.» Just ... Читать далее...
4. Driver pays 1 million RMB for ‘lucky’ 88888 license plate, gets pulled over 8 times in one dayAfter spending just 30,000 RMB ($4,370) on his new vehicle, a driver surnamed Liu decided to splurge on his license plate, spending 1 million RMB ($145,705) on one with 5 lucky number 8s, hoping it would keep him out of trouble on the road. It totally backfired on him. On his first day behind the ... Читать далее...
5. The Cop QuizBy -=ShoEboX=- (This article originally appeared in Putsch Electronic Magazine.) Are you ready to be pulled over? Are you prepared to hand over your license and registration in the middle of the night to a prejudiced pig who doesn’t like you or your Dead Kennedys bumper sticker? Take this simple quiz and find out! Listed ... Читать далее...
6. A state trooper pulled a car overA state trooper pulled a car over and told the man driving that he was going 50 mph in a 40 mph zone. «I was only going 40!» the driver protested. «Not according to my radar,» the trooper said. «Yes, I was!» the man shouted back. «No you weren’t!» the trooper said. With that, the ... Читать далее...
7. Arguing about the signA man was driving down a local street one day and approached a stop sign. He barely slowed down and ran right through the stop sign after glancing for traffic. What the driver didn’t know was that a policeman was watching the intersection. The policeman pulled out after him and stopped the car two blocks ... Читать далее...
8. Метро/ MetroНа английском языке Перевод на русский язык Metro Метро In my opinion the best way to move around the city is metro. Metro trains are speedy and comfortable. Most of the time, they are not overloaded, however during the rush hours it gets rather stuffy. Some people call metro the underground and it is easy ... Читать далее...
9. A driver pulled up beside a rundown farmhouseA driver pulled up beside a rundown farmhouse. He got out and knocked at the door. A very old woman answered the door, and he asked her for directions to Des Moines. «Don’t know,» the woman said. He got back in his car and pulled away. Then he heard voices. He looked in his rearview ... Читать далее...
10. The answer to the eternal questionA man was speeding down the highway, feeling secure in a gaggle of cars all traveling at the same speed. However, as they passed a speed trap, he got nailed with an infrared speed detector and was pulled over. The officer handed him the citation, received his signature and was about to walk away when ... Читать далее...
11. Charged for speedingA man was speeding down a Alabama highway, feeling secure in a gaggle of cars all traveling at the same speed. However, as they passed a speed trap, he got nailed with an infrared speed detector and was pulled over. The officer handed him the citation, received his signature and was about to walk away ... Читать далее...
12. A guy was pulled over by a copA guy was pulled over by a cop. The cop says to the guy you’re eyes are bloodshot have you been drinking. The guy says tothe cop you’re eyes are glazed have you been eating donuts Sent by paul...
13. Now he’s in troubleA police officer had just pulled a car over. When he walked up to the car a man rolled down the window and said, «what’s the problem officer?» To which the policeman responded, «I stopped you for running that red light behind you.» Just then the man’s wife leaned forward from the driver’s seat and ... Читать далее...
14. Don’t say this to a copThe top 20 things not to say to a cop when he pulls you over. 20. I can’t reach my license unless you hold my beer. 19. Sorry officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in. 18. Aren’t you the guy from the villiage people? 17. Hey, you must have been doing 125 ... Читать далее...
15. Obey the speed limitSitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer see’s a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself, «This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!»So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over. Approaching the car, he notices that there are ... Читать далее...
16. Two guys are driving through Texas whenTwo guys are driving through Texas when they get pulled over by a state trooper. The trooper walks up, taps on the window with his nightstick, the driver rolls down the window, and the trooper smacks him in the head with the stick. The driver says, «Why’d you do that? The trooper says, «You’re in ... Читать далее...
17. You tell me!A game warden came upon a duck hunter who had bagged 3 ducks and decided to «enforce the laws pending.» He stopped the hunter, flashed his badge and said, «Looks like you’ve had a pretty good day. Mind if I inspect your kill?» The hunter shrugged and handed the ducks to the warden. The warden ... Читать далее...
18. Blonde on blondeA blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde. The cop asked to see the blonde’s driver’s license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. «What does it look like?» she finally ... Читать далее...
19. Перевод слова trapTrap — ловушка, капкан, западня Перевод слова To set a booby trap — поставить ловушку police trap — полицейская западня tank trap — противотанковая ловушка He fell right into the Trap. Он упал прямо в западню. There’s no way out! We’re Trapped! Здесь нет выхода! Мы в ловушке! Amanda felt that marriage was a Trap. ... Читать далее...
20. Значение идиомы pull over[pull over] {v.} To drive to the side of the road and stop. Thepoliceman told the speeder to pull over. Everyone pulled over tolet the ambulance pass....
21. Giving sad news to a troopThe Captain called the Sergeant in. «Sarge, I just got a telegram that Private Jones’ mother died yesterday. Better go tell him and send him in to see me.» So the Sergeant calls for his morning formation and lines up all the troops. «Listen up, men,» says the Sergeant. «Johnson, report to the mess hall ... Читать далее...
22. Radar Gun ErrorAn off-duty police officer, familiar with radar guns, drove through a school zone within the legal speed limit when the flash of a camera went off, taking a picture of his license plate. The officer, thinking the radar was in error, drove by again; even more slowly. Another flash. He did it again for a ... Читать далее...
23. Army fitness reportBritish Military Officer Fitness Reports The British Military writes OFR’s (officer fitness reports). The form used for Royal Navy and Marines fitness reports is the S206. The following are actual excerpts taken from people’s «206’s»…. — His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity. — I would not breed from this Officer. ... Читать далее...
24. He’s drunk at the barOne night a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible DUI violations. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. The man sat in the front seat fumbling around with his ... Читать далее...
25. NPR Pulled a Brilliant April Fools’ Prank On People Who Don’t Read«Why doesn’t America read anymore?» NPR asked on Tuesday. «We totally do, NPR. Shut up. We read all the time. We’re reading your article right now!» Facebook commenters screeched. But they didn’t read the article. If they had, they would’ve seen this: Eventually, some commenters began to catch on and spoil the joke, but the ... Читать далее...
26. British Military Officer Fitness ReportsThe British Military writes OFR’s (officer fitness reports). The form used for Royal Navy and Marines fitness reports is the S206. The following are actual excerpts taken from people’s «206’s»…. — His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity. — I would not breed from this Officer. — This Officer is really ... Читать далее...
27. Need fishing licensesA couple of young fellers were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bush’s jumped the Game Warden!! Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods, and hot on his heels came the Game Warden. After about a half mile the fella ... Читать далее...
28. Перевод слова avenueAvenue — дорога, аллея; путь, средство Перевод слова Avenue of limes — липовая аллея avenue to India — путь в Индию avenue to success — путь к успеху We drove east along Brooklyn Avenue. Мы поехали на Восток вдоль Бруклин-авеню. There are many Avenues open to researchers. Множество путей открыты для исследователей....
29. Reporting a Stolen CarKenji: Hello, my car was Stolen and I want to report it. Officer: Where was it when it was stolen? Kenji: It was parked outside of my apartment building. I went outside this morning to drive to work, and it was gone. Officer: Okay, you need to fill out this form. Put down the Make ... Читать далее...
30. A couple was delighted when finally their long wait to adoptA couple was delighted when finally their long wait to adopt a baby came to an end. The adoption center called and told them they had a wonderful Japanese baby boy, and the couple took him without hesitation. On the way home from the adoption center, they stopped by the local college so they each ... Читать далее...
31. Значение идиомы shut up[shut up] {v.} 1. {informal} To stop talking. Little Ruthie toldFather about his birthday surprise before Mother could shut her up. -Often used as a command; usually considered rude. Shut up and letJoe say something. If you’ll shut up for a minute, I’ll tell youour plan. Syn.: BUTTON YOUR LIP, DRY UP, KEEP ONE’S MOUTH ... Читать далее...
32. Перевод слова shutShut — закрывать, затворять, закрытый Перевод слова To keep one’s mouth shut — держать язык за зубами to shut the lid — захлопнуть крышку to shut the door on proposals — решительно отвергнуть предложения to shut a passage — перекрыть проход He Shut his eyes and went to sleep. Он закрыл глаза и заснул. He ... Читать далее...
33. Перевод слова officerOfficer — офицер, чиновник, должностное лицо Перевод слова Assistant officer — помощник должностного лица customs officer — таможенный чиновник non-combatant officer — офицер запаса flying control officer — диспетчер полетов The police Officer was directing traffic. Полицейский регулировал движение транспорта. No Officer was touched. Ни один офицер не был ранен. He is an Officer of ... Читать далее...
34. This businessman was walking down the sidewalkThis businessman was walking down the sidewalk when a jet black van stopped by him. The guys pulled the man inside, stripped him of all his clothes till he was butt naked, threw him back outside, and then slammed the door shut taking off. Five miles later the men look outside and see the businessman ... Читать далее...
35. A blonde walks into the police department looking for a jobA blonde walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few questions…. Officer: What’s 2+2? Blonde: Ummmmm… 4! Officer: What’s the square root of 100? Blonde: Ummmm… 10! Officer: Good! Now, who killed Abraham Lincoln? Blonde: Ummmm… I dunno. Officer: Well, you can go home and think ... Читать далее...
36. Time for the weddingA police officer stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. «But officer,» the man began, «I can explain.» «Just be quiet,» snapped the officer. «I’m going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back.» «But, officer, I just wanted to say,» «And I said to keep quiet! You’re ... Читать далее...
37. Значение идиомы shut off[shut off] {v.} 1. To make stop coming. Please shut off the hose before the grass gets toowet. Compare: TURN OFF. 2. To be apart; be separated from; also toseparate from. Our camp is so far from the highway we feel shut offfrom the world when we are there. The sow is so bad tempered ... Читать далее...
38. Too much speedingA police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. «But, officer,» the man began, «I can explain» «Just be quiet,» snapped the officer. «I’m going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back.» «But, officer, I just wanted to say» «And I said ... Читать далее...
39. Chief is at a weddingA police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. «But officer,» the man began, «I can explain.» «Just be quiet,» snapped the officer. «I’m going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back.» «But, officer, I just wanted to say,» «And I said ... Читать далее...
40. Ex-Police car jokeWe have various local spots where the teenagers park, cruise, hold drag races, drink beer etc. We happen to own a white 1983 Dodge Diplomat, the exact kind of car used by the State Patrol around here as well as many law enforcement agencies nationwide. (Actually our car WAS a state patrol car, but that’s ... Читать далее...