The cost of a brain

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1. Purchasing new brains A mid-level executive was so frustrated at being passed over for promotion year after year, that, in frustration, he went to a brain-transplant center in the hope of raising his I. Q. 20 points. After a battery of physical and psychological tests, he was told by the center’s director that he was an acceptable candidate. […]...
2. A Programmer and an Engineer are sitting next to each other A Programmer and an Engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Programmer leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window […]...
3. Перевод слова cost Cost – цена, стоимость Перевод слова At cost value – по себестоимости saving in cost – экономия затрат to cost smb. dear – дорого обходиться кому-л. How much does it Cost per kilo? Сколько стоит килограмм? It Cost three dollars. Это стоит три доллара. This mistake Cost him his job. Эта ошибка стоила ему работы....
4. The dog and the butcher A dog ran into a butcher shop and grabbed a roast off the counter. Fortunately, the butcher recognized the dog as belonging to a neighbour of his. The neighbour happened to be a lawyer. Incensed at the theft, the butcher called up his neighbour and said, “Hey, if your dog stole a roast from my […]...
5. Перевод слова brain Brain – мозг Перевод слова Brain damage – повреждение мозга brain disorder – расстройство умственной деятельности engineering brain – технический склад ума My Brain was in a buzz. Мои мозги гудели. I am not a Brain as you well know. Как ты знаешь, я не слишком способный. Alcohol fogs his Brain. Алкоголь затуманивает его мозги....
6. Question and answer Q: How can you tell if a lawyer is well hung? A: You can’t get a finger between the rope and his neck! Q: If you are stranded on a desert island with Adolph Hitler, Atilla the Hun, and a lawyer, and you have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do? A: […]...
7. Значение идиомы rack one’s brain [rack one’s brain] {v. phr.} To try your best to think; make agreat mental effort; especially: to try to remember something you haveknown. Bob racked his brain trying to remember where he left thebook. Susan racked her brain trying to guess whom the valentinecame from. John racked his brain during the test trying to solvethe […]...
8. YOUR BRAIN STAYS HALF AWAKE WHEN YOU SLEEP IN A NEW PLACE If you’ve ever slept in a hotel, gone camping, or even slept over at a friend’s pad, chances are you’ve woken up the next day feeling groggy and bleary-eyed. Even if you don’t remember tossing and turning, you probably felt pretty tired the next day. Well, that’s because nature dies hard. When we sleep in […]...
9. A man walked into a lawyer’s office and A man walked into a lawyer’s office and inquired about the rates. “Fifty dollars for three questions,” replied the lawyer. “Isn’t that awfully steep?” asked the man. “Yes,” the lawyer replied, “and what was your third question?”...
10. Значение идиомы brain drain [brain drain] {n.}, {informal} 1. The loss of the leading intellectuals and researchers of a country due to excessive emigration to other countries where conditions are better. Britain suffered a considerable brain drain to the United States after World War II. 2. An activity requiring great mental concentration resulting in fatigue and exhaustion That math […]...
11. Значение идиомы cost a bomb [cost a bomb] or [an arm and a leg] {v. phr.} To be extremely expensive. My new house has cost us an arm and a leg and we’re almost broke....
12. Значение идиомы on the brain [on the brain] {adj. phr.}, {slang} Filling your thoughts; too muchthought about; almost always in mind. Mary Ann has boys on thebrain. Joe’s hobby is ham radio and he has radio on the brain mostof the time....
13. Перевод слова ounce Ounce – унция, чуточка Перевод слова Cents an ounce – центов за унцию an ounce of ability – зачаточные навыки coining value of an ounce of gold – монетная стоимость унции золота He hasn’t got an Ounce of sense. У него нет ни капли здравого смысла. An Ounce of practice equals a pound of theory. […]...
14. Значение идиомы brain trust [brain trust] {n.} A group of specially trained, highly intelligent experts in a given field. Albert Einstein gathered a brain trust around himself at the Princeton Institute of Advanced Studies....
15. Flying on Low-Cost Airlines Sue: I just made Airline reservations for our trip. Do you want to look over the Itinerary before I purchase the tickets? Alex: Which airline is it? Sue: It’s McTse Air. Alex: Oh, no, I don’t want to fly on that Low-cost airline! We don’t get Assigned seats and all of the Passengers Rush the […]...
16. The clerk showed the man the store’s most expensive perfume The clerk showed the man the store’s most expensive perfume. “This is called ‘Perhaps’,” said the sales clerk. “It’s $285 per ounce.” “Listen,” the man shot back, “for $285 an ounce, I don’t want something called ‘Perhaps’; I want something called… “You Can Bet Your Sweet Ass You’ll Get Some!!”...
17. Перевод идиомы brain drain, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: brain drain Перевод: утечка мозгов; эмиграция, выезд интеллектуальных сил страны Пример: If Canada’s best professors move away, it’s called a brain drain. Если лучшие профессоры Канады уедут из страны, это будет зваться утечкой мозгов....
18. Man needs a turkey It’s the day before Thanksgiving, and the butcher is just locking up when a man begins pounding on the front door. “Please let me in,” says the man desperately. “I forgot to buy a turkey, and my wife will kill me if I don’t come home with one.” “Okay,” says the butcher. “Let me see […]...
19. New Minnesota Vikings stadium construction cost more than NASA’s trip to Pluto The cost to construct NFL stadiums has reached an astronomical level – literally. Pat Kessler of CBS Minnesota recently pointed out a mind-blowing fact: The construction of the Minnesota Vikings’ new stadium is a more costly project than the space probe NASA sent to Pluto. The Vikings’ new home, recently christened U. S. Bank Stadium, […]...
20. A supermarket had a sale on boneless chicken breasts A supermarket had a sale on boneless chicken breasts, and a woman I know intended to stock up. At the store, however, she was disappointed to find only a few skimpy prepackaged portions of the poultry, so she complained to the butcher. “don’t worry, ya,” he said. “I’ll pack some more trays and have them […]...
21. Eight weeks to a better brain Meditation study shows changes associated with awareness, stress. Participating in an eight-week mindfulness meditation program appears to make measurable changes in brain regions associated with memory, sense of self, empathy, and stress. In a study that will appear in the Jan. 30 issue of Psychiatry Research: Neuroimaging, a team led by Harvard-affiliated researchers at Massachusetts […]...
22. Changing gut bacteria through diet affects brain function, UCLA study shows UCLA researchers now have the first evidence that bacteria ingested in food can affect brain function in humans. In an early proof-of-concept study of healthy women, they found that women who regularly consumed beneficial bacteria known as probiotics through yogurt showed altered brain function, both while in a resting state and in response to an […]...
23. THE HUMAN BRAIN IN SPACE: EUPHORIA AND THE “OVERVIEW EFFECT” EXPERIENCED BY ASTRONAUTS Could be the best example yet of being “spaced out”? When in space, astronauts have repeatedly reported inexplicable euphoria, a “cosmic connection” or an increased sensitivity to their place in the Universe. The experience sounds like the ultimate high, or the ultimate enlightening; it would appear that without trying, astronauts are able to attain a […]...
24. Lawyers as lab rats The National Institute of Health (NIH) announced last week that they were going to start using lawyers instead of rats in their experiments. Naturally, the American Bar Association was outraged and filed suit. Yet, the NIH presented some very good reasons for the switch. 1. The lab assistants were becoming very attached to their little […]...
25. How to hunt elephants – Lawyers style How to hunt elephants – Lawyer’s style Lawyers don’t hunt elephants, but they do follow the herds around arguing about who owns the droppings. Software lawyers will claim that they own an entire herd based on the look and feel of one dropping. Sent by Alex...
26. Magic Mushrooms Create a Hyperconnected Brain Magic mushrooms can create vivid hallucinations of strange and fantastical things, such as abstract geometric shapes. Magic mushrooms may give users trippy experiences by creating a hyperconnected brain. The active ingredient in the psychedelic drug, psilocybin, seems to completely disrupt the normal communication networks in the brain, by connecting “brain regions that don’t normally talk […]...
27. Movie theater popcorn costs more than fillet mignon Movie theater popcorn apparently costs more per ounce than fillet mignon. You’re probably aware that if you go to the movies these days, you should probably show up well fed. Concession stand snacks and drinks are downright expensive, and if you see a lot of movies, you’ve probably considered sneaking your own into the theater. […]...
28. Pillsbury Dough Boy wanted for attempted murder A lady named Linda went to Arkansas last week to visit her in-laws, and while there, went to a store. She parked next to a car with a woman sitting in it, her eyes closed and hands behind her head, apparently sleeping. When Linda came out a while later, she again saw the woman, her […]...
29. Lawyers are greedy A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW. “Officer, look what they’ve done to my Beeeeemer!!!”, he whined. “You lawyers are so […]...
30. Investment counselor An investment counselor decided to go out on her own. She was shrewd and diligent, so business kept coming in, and pretty soon she realized that she needed an in-house counsel. The investment banker began to interview young lawyers. “As I’m sure you can understand,” she started off with one of the first applicants, “in […]...
31. Why lawyers should never ask a witness a question Why lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer: In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand – a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her and asked, “Mrs.. Jones, do you know me?” She responded, “Why, yes I do know […]...
32. Unaware of $2 bail, man spends almost five months in prison NEW YORK – Two measly dollars stood between a New York City man and freedom, but he had no idea. Instead, a 41-year-old Queens man remained in a Rikers Island cell from November 2014 to April 2015, his new lawyers argued before a judge last week, according to the New York Daily News. Aitabdel Salem […]...
33. Перевод слова engineer Engineer – инженер Перевод слова Electrical engineer – инженер-электрик mechanical engineer – инженер-механик systems engineer – инженер – системный программист The Engineer stopped the train. Инженер остановил поезд. He has engaged himself to an Engineer. Он нанялся к одному инженеру. We currently have a vacancy for an Engineer. В настоящее время у нас есть вакансия […]...
34. At the Butcher’s Butcher: What can I get for you? Gina: I’d like a pound of Ground beef, please. Butcher: Would you like the regular or the extra Lean? The extra lean is a dollar more per pound. Gina: I’ll take the regular. Could you also Throw in two thick Pork chops and two Chicken breasts? Butcher: I’m […]...
35. At the Butcher’s Butcher: What can I get for you? Gina: I’d like a pound of Ground beef, please. Butcher: Would you like the regular or the extra Lean? The extra lean is a dollar more per pound. Gina: I’ll take the regular. Could you also Throw in two thick Pork chops and two Chicken breasts? Butcher: I’m […]...
36. Are You a Bird Brain? You May Wish You Were! On those days when you start to feel that your coursework is taxing your brain, take a moment to think about Alex, an African grey parrot, who was the subject of a thirty-year (1977-2007) experiment by an animal psychologist named Irene Pepperberg, initially at the University of Arizona and later at Harvard and Brandeis University. […]...
37. A dog walks into a butcher shop A dog walks into a butcher shop with a purse strapped around his neck. He walks up to the meat case and calmly sits there until it’s his turn to be waited on. A man, who was already in the butcher shop, finished his purchase and noticed the dog. The butcher leaned over the counter […]...
38. Значение идиомы blow one’s brains out [blow one’s brains out] {v. phr.} 1. To shoot yourself in the head. Mr. Jones lost all his wealth, so he blew his brains out. 2. {slang} To work very hard; overwork yourself. The boys blew their brains out to get the stage ready for the play. Mary is not one to blow her brains […]...
39. An old man was critically ill An old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he called his lawyer. “I want to become a lawyer. How much is it or the express degree you told me about?” “It’s $50,000,” the lawyer said. “But why? You’ll be dead soon, why do you want to become a lawyer?” “That’s my business! […]...
40. Communication problem There was this Asian lady married to an American gentleman and they lived in Honolulu. The poor lady was not very proficient in English, but managed to communicate with her husband. The real problem arose whenever she had to shop for groceries. One day, she went to the butcher and wanted to buy pork legs. […]...