One day shortly after the birth of their new baby

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1. A pregnant woman is about to give birthA pregnant woman is about to give birth. The doctor has her on the delivery table, legs up in the stirrups. Suddenly, he sees the top of a head push through. Then the baby pops its head out and says to the doctor, «Are you my dad?». The doctor says, «No, I am your doctor!». ... Читать далее...
2. Two storks on a nest, a father stork and baby storkTwo storks on a nest, a father stork and baby stork. Baby is crying and crying and father stork is trying to calm him. «Don’t worry Son, your mother will come back. She’s only bringing people babies and making them happy.» The next night, its fathers turn to do the job. «Son, your father will ... Читать далее...
3. Baby bear wants to live somewhere elseThe three bears had been having some trouble recently and had ended up in family court. Mama and Papa bear were splitting up, and baby bear had to decide who he was going to live with. So, the judge wanted to talk to baby bear to see what he thought about living with either of ... Читать далее...
4. Delivering a babyA country doctor went way out to the boondocks to deliver a baby. It was so far out, there was no electricity. When the doctor arrived, no one was home except for the laboring mother and her 5-year-old child. The doctor instructed the child to hold a lantern high so he could see, while he ... Читать далее...
5. A man is waiting for his wife to give birthA man is waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs. The son is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion. After 21 years, ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова shortlyShortly — вскоре, кратко, сжато Перевод слова He will come shortly — он скоро придет shortly after noon — вскоре после полудня odd come shortly — ближайший день to put it shortly — короче говоря We arrived Shortly before six o’clock. Мы прибыли незадолго до шести часов. He hopes Shortly to contract his expenses. Он ... Читать далее...
7. Значение идиомы give birth to[give birth to] {v. phr.} 1. To bear live offspring. The mothergave birth to twin baby girls. 2. To bring about; create; occasion. Beethoven gave birth to a new kind of symphony....
8. Ten pounds of prideA Texan bought a round of drinks for all in the bar and announced that his wife had just produced a typical Texas baby, weighing a whopping twenty pounds. «WOW!» was the response from everyone at the bar. Two weeks later the Texan returned to the bar. The bartender recognized him and asked, «Aren’t you ... Читать далее...
9. Перевод слова birthBirth — рождение Перевод слова An artist by birth — художник по призванию normal birth — ничем не осложненное появление на свет of noble birth — знатного происхождения She gave Birth to a son. Она родила сына. What’s your date of Birth? Какова ваша дата рождения? He has been Deaf since birth. Он был глухой ... Читать далее...
10. A young married couple has difficulties conceiving a babyA young married couple has difficulties conceiving a baby, so after a while the wife consults her doctor, who recommends the minor of three possible operations. The operation is performed, but a month later, she’s still not pregnant, so she goes to see the doctor again. This time he recommends the medium operation, a somewhat ... Читать далее...
11. Giving Birth to TwinsJerome: Congratulations! I just heard that you’re Pregnant with Twins. Paula: Thanks. We’re very excited, although I’m a little worried about a Multiple birth. Jerome: I Come from a long line of multiple births. My father is an Identical twin and he had cousins who are Fraternal twins. Paula: I see what you mean. Jerome: ... Читать далее...
12. Английские слова на тему «Детская. The Baby’s room»Baby carriage — коляска Baby food — детское питание Baby formula — детское питание Baby lotion — детский лосьон Baby wipes — cалфетки Bib — слюнявчик Bottle — бутылочка Car seat — автомобильное кресло Changing pad — пеленка Changing table/dressing table — пеленальный столик Chest of drawers — комод Cloth diapers — тканевые подгузники Cotton ... Читать далее...
13. Перевод слова babyBaby — ребенок, младенец Перевод слова Mother’s baby — мамин любимчик, маменькин сынок the chirrup of the baby — детский щебет baby daughter — дочурка, малышка How is the Baby? Как чувствует себя ребенок? Don’t be a Baby! Не будь ребенком! The Baby’s so cute. Ребенок такой милый. Примеры из жизни Слово ‘baby’ используется во ... Читать далее...
14. Значение идиомы baby boom[baby boom] {n.} A sudden increase in the birth rate. The universities were filled to capacity due to the baby boom that followed World War II....
15. Giving Birth in a HospitalIt was 2 o’clock in the morning when my wife woke me up. She is eight-and-a-half months Pregnant and she told me that her Water had broken. She said that she was having Contractions and she was sure that she was In labor. I Paged our doctor and drove to the hospital. When we arrived, ... Читать далее...
16. Baby BoomersAfter World War II Americans and Europeans were busy rebuilding their countries and economies. It was a time in which soldiers came home from war camps and went back to their normal lives. In the years that followed many babies were born and the birth rates went up quickly. This generation of people became known ... Читать далее...
17. Shortly after being assigned to a new base, a LieutenantShortly after being assigned to a new base, a Lieutenant and his wife were invited to the Colonel’s home for an evening of bridge. The Lieutenant was partnered with the Colonel’s wife and vice versa. After many hands, the Lieutenant excused himself to use the toilet, but accidentally left the door ajar. When the sound ... Читать далее...
18. Hero cat saves baby from freezing to deathEat your heart out, Lassie! Masha, a long-haired tabby cat, saved the life of a baby abandoned in the streets of Russia — after she climbed into the box he was discarded in and kept him warm, health officials said. «The baby had only been outside for a few hours and thanks to Masha… he ... Читать далее...
19. There once was a baby elephant and a baby turtleThere once was a baby elephant and a baby turtle drinking from a river deep in the jungle. For no reason, the turtle reaches over and bites the elephant’s tail, really hard. Years and years later, the same elephant, now grown up, is by the same river, having a drink with his giraffe buddy, when ... Читать далее...
20. An unfortunate situationA lovely young Jewish girl was employed by a clothing firm in New York. She and her widowed mother shared the same ambition: marriage to a wealthy man. One day she returned from work, eyes red from crying. As soon as she entered the apartment she called, «MAMA, I’m pregnant! Don’t get excited. The father ... Читать далее...
21. Some problemsA woman gives birth by a Caesarian and passes out. When she comes to her senses, the doctor approaches her bed and says: «I’m sorry to tell you, Mrs. Smith, that your baby has some serious problems.» «What problems, doctor? I mean, when it arrives, I’ll love it. It’s my child and I’ll love it ... Читать далее...
22. Crying about lifeOld Man On A Bench An old man of ninety was sitting on a park bench crying. A policeman noticed this and asked him why he was crying. «Well,» says the old fellow, «I just got married to a twenty-five year old woman. Every morning she makes me a wonderful breakfast, and we have then ... Читать далее...
23. A little town had a high birth rate thatA little town had a high birth rate that had attracted the attention of the sociologists at the state university. They wrote a grant proposal; got a huge chunk of money; hired a few additional sociologists, anthropologist and a family planning and birth control specialist; moved to town; rented offices; set up their computers; got ... Читать далее...
24. A man comes to a doctor andA man comes to a doctor and, twitching his fingers and stuttering, finally manages to say, «Doctor, I have a sexual performance problem. Can you help me?» «Oh, that’s not a problem for us men anymore!» announces a proud physician, «They just came out with this new wonder drug, Viagra, that does the trick! You ... Читать далее...
25. The woman who gave birth for HitlerIn 1936, Nazi supporter and school graduate Hildegard Trutz was recruited as one of Germany’s racially’pure’ women, chosen to sleep with SS officers in the hope of producing an Aryan child. It is estimated that some 20,000 such babies were bred during the 12 years of the Third Reich, principally in Germany and Norway. This ... Читать далее...
26. A woman, a bus and a babyA woman gets onto a bus with her baby. The bus driver says, «That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen. Ugh!» The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, «The driver has just insulted me!» The man says, «There’s no call ... Читать далее...
27. My heart setA certain old gentleman thought his eyesight was going bad, and he was advised to go to see an eye doctor. He goes in to see the doctor, and the doctor said, «All right, let’s check you out. You sit down here on this stool. You put your right hand over your right eye and ... Читать далее...
28. Free meatIt was many years ago since the embarrassing day when a young woman, with a baby in her arms, entered his butcher shop and confronted him with the news that the baby was his and asked what was he going to do about it? Finally he offered to provide her with free meat until the ... Читать далее...
29. Naming your childThere was a woman who was pregnant with twins, and shortly before they were due, she had an accident and went into a coma. Her husband was away on business, and unable to be reached. While in the coma, she gave birth to her twins, and the only person around to name her children was ... Читать далее...
30. Speaking to a Baby or Young ChildMy sister had to go out of town for a couple of days and I offered To look after her 18-month-old Twins. It wasn’t long before I realized that I was Over my head! … Colleen: Okay, you two, it’s time to go Beddy-bye. Baby: No! Colleen: Yes, let’s get your Jammies on. You can ... Читать далее...
31. Preparing for a New BabyWanda: Oh hi, I wasn’t expecting you today. Enrique: We’ve been cleaning out our garage and your sister said I should come by with a few things for your baby. Wanda: That’s really sweet of you guys, but I’m not Due for another six months. Enrique: But you’ll need these things to get the baby’s ... Читать далее...
32. Значение идиомы throw the baby out with the bath[throw the baby out with the bath ] {v. phr.} To rejectall of something because part is faulty. God knows that there areweaknesses in the program, but if they act too hastily they may causethe baby to be thrown out with the bathwater....
33. The wealthy, high-society mother of a 17-year-old girlThe wealthy, high-society mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex. Worried the girl might become pregnant, and adversely impact the family’s status, she consulted the family doctor. The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful, and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion. ... Читать далее...
34. Значение идиомы baby kisser[baby kisser] {n.}, {slang} A person campaigning for votes in his quest for elected political office; such persons often kiss little children in public. Nixon was a baby kisser when he ran for Vice President with Eisenhower....
35. Different TreatmentsA doctor had the reputation of helping couples increase the joy in their sex life, but always promised not to take a case if he felt he could not help them. The Browns came to see the doctor. He gave them thorough physical exams, psychological exams, and various tests, then concluded, «Yes, I am happy ... Читать далее...
36. A mother and her son were flying Southwest AirlinesA mother and her son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas to Chicago. The son, who had been looking out the window, turned to his mother and said, «If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don’t big planes have baby planes?» The mother, who couldn’t think of an answer, ... Читать далее...
37. Two children are in a doctor’s waiting roomTwo children are in a doctor’s waiting room, and one of them is crying. «Why are you crying?» asked the other child. «I’m here for a blood test, and they’re going to cut my finger.» When he heard this, the other child started to cry. «Why are you crying?» «I’m here for a urine test.»...
38. Having a BabyPatrick: Hey, congratulations! I just heard that You’re expecting. How far along are you? Cindy: Thanks. I’m Four and a half months pregnant. It feels like it! I feel huge. Patrick: You don’t look it. I bet Carlos is excited. Do you know yet if it’s a boy or a girl? Cindy: No, we don‚Aot. ... Читать далее...
39. A six year old comes cryingA six year old comes crying to his Mother because his little sister pulled his hair. «Don’t be angry,» the Mother says, «Your little sister doesn’t realize that pulling hair hurts.» A short while later, there’s more crying, and the Mother goes to investigate. This time the sister is bawling and her brother says… «Now ... Читать далее...
40. In the back woods of ArkansasIn the back woods of Arkansas, Mr. Stewart’s wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. To keep the nervous father-to-be busy, the doctor handed him a lantern and said, «Here, you hold this high so I can see what I’m doing.» ... Читать далее...