My dog ate my homework

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1. Little Johnny was in class again Little Johnny was in class again. Teacher asked everyone “Can anyone tell me a sentence with the word definitely in it?” Meg puts up her hand.”The sky is definitely blue.”... ...
2. Animal stuttering Little Johnny is sitting in a biology class, and the teacher says that an interesting phenomenon of nature is that only humans stutter, no other animal in the world does... ...
3. Little Johnny walks into his primary school Little Johnny walks into his primary school classroom one morning to be confronted by his teacher. Teacher “Ahh, Good Morning Johnny, and where were you yesterday?” Johnny “I’m sorry Miss,... ...
4. Little Johnny was late for school Little Johnny was late for school. When he finally got there his teacher asked, “Why are you late little Johnny?” Johnny replied, “My grandpa got burnt, Miss.” The teacher replied,... ...
5. The Teacher tells the class they are going to play a game The Teacher tells the class they are going to play a game, she will describe an object and the students will tell her what she had described. Teacher: “The first... ...
6. Everything we need A young teacher was trying to teach her six-year-old charges about sharing. In the midst of doing so, she said that no one had everything they wanted. At this point,... ...
7. Перевод слова eighteen Eighteen – восемнадцать Перевод слова Of eighteen years – восемнадцатилетний chapter eighteen – восемнадцатая глава eighteen times as much – в восемнадцать раз больше He went to sea when he... ...
8. The last words A teacher was asking her class what their fathers did. When she asked little Johnny, he said, “My father’s dead, Miss.” “Oh, I am sorry, Johnny. In that case, what... ...
9. Johnny missed his final exam due to the flu Johnny missed his final exam due to the flu, but he’d done so well during the year that the teacher suggests to the principal they give him an oral exam... ...
10. Перевод слова solemn Solemn – торжественный, серьезный, официальный Перевод слова Solemn air – серьезный вид solemn declaration – официальное заявление solemn celebration – торжественное празднование We made a Solemn promise to love each... ...
11. Bush fans v. Kerry fans There’s a teacher in a small Texas town. She asks her class how many of them are Bush fans. Not really knowing what a Bush fan is, but wanting to... ...
12. A lesson in ebonics A sixth grade class is doing some spelling drills. The teacher asks Tommy if he can spell ‘before.’ He stands up and says, “Before, B-E-P-H-O-R.” The teacher says, “No, that’s... ...
13. Перевод слова swear Swear – присяга, клясться Перевод слова To swear by one’s life – поклясться своей жизнью to swear accusation – обвинить под присягой to swear loyalty – клясться в верности Don’t... ...
14. The homework schedule Here is an explanation of the school homework policy for the average student. Students should not spend more than ninety minutes per night. This time should be budgeted in the... ...
15. Loan Forgiveness Programs Martin: One hundred eleven days And counting. Georgina: Are you Counting down To something? Martin: I’m counting down to the day when my Student loans will be Discharged. I only... ...
16. Little Johnny comes home from school Little Johnny comes home from school with a note from his teacher, indicating that “Johnny seems to be having some difficulty with the difference between boys and girls,” and would... ...
17. Little Johny being literal Teacher asks the children to discuss what their Dad’s do for a living. Little Mary says: “My Dad is a lawyer. He puts the bad guys in jail.” Little Jack... ...
18. Mrs. Prussy The little darlings were all in their seats on the first day of school and their new teacher introduced herself. She wrote on the board that her name is Ms.... ...
19. One day a teacher was teaching religion One day a teacher was teaching religion, when she asked the class “What part of your body do you think goes up to heaven first?” Two children rose their hand.... ...
20. Where is the French border? “Why do you look so glum today?”, the teacher asked young Johnny. “I didn’t have no breakfast,” Johnny mumbled. “You poor dear,” said the teacher. “Now, to return to our... ...
21. Do the math The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn’t paying attention in class. She called on him and said, “Johnny! what are 4, 2, 28 and 44?” Little Johnny quickly replied,... ...
22. Little Johnny had become a real nuisance Little Johnny had become a real nuisance while his father tried to concentrate on his Saturday afternoon poker game with friends and relatives. His father tried every way possible to... ...
23. Little Johnny was in his math’s class one day Little Johnny was in his math’s class one day when the teacher singled him out. “If I gave you $20,” the teacher began,” and you gave $5 to Mary, $5... ...
24. The teacher hears Little Johnny cussing, and The teacher hears Little Johnny cussing, and gets pissed off. She goes bitching to Little Johnny’s father. She comes to Little Johnny’s house and sees Little Johnny fucking a goat... ...
25. In the Sex Ed class the teacher says In the Sex Ed class the teacher says, “All right, class, I want you to go home and come back tomorrow with as many positions as you can think of... ...
26. Famous Quotes One Friday morning, a teacher came up with a novel way to motivate her class. She told them that she would read a quote and the first student to correctly... ...
27. Перевод слова response Response – ответ, реакция, отклик Перевод слова He made no response – он ничего не ответил in response to your inquiry – в ответ на ваш запрос biological response –... ...
28. Talking About Movies Martin: What did you think of that movie? Joanna: It was okay, but I’m not really into Big-budget movies with a lot of Special effects and Big-name stars. Martin: Oh,... ...
29. Strict school It was the first day of school, and the elementary school teacher was establishing the fact that she’d take no nonsense from the kiddies this year. While taking the roll,... ...
30. Who signed the Declaration of Independence? A Kentucky teacher was quizzing her students. “Johnny, who signed the Declaration of Independence?” He said, “Damn if I know.” She was a little put out by his swearing, so... ...
31. Little Johnny’s mother decided to give Little Johnny’s mother decided to give her son an anatomy lesson one day, so she took off all of her clothes and pointed to her vagina, and said, “Johnny. This... ...
32. Training Inexperienced Employees Kazuko: I really appreciate you helping with the training of the Newbies. I couldn’t have done it without you. Martin: Don’t mention it. I remember when I was still Wet... ...
33. One day in class the teacher One day in class the teacher has sex education. On the black board she draws a penis then asks the class if any of them knows what it is. In... ...
34. Little Tommy is at the zoo on a school visit Little Tommy is at the zoo on a school visit and he spots a deer. Being a city kid he’s never seen one before and so he asks his teacher,... ...
35. Asking for Time Off Johnny: I just found out that the manager is letting Neal Take Friday off. I asked him two days ago for Friday off and he Turned me down! Francesca: Neal’s... ...
36. Значение идиомы swear in [swear in] or [swear into] {v.} To have a person swear or promiseto do his duty as a member or an officer of an organization, government department, or similar group.... ...
37. Перевод слова swear in Swear in – приводить к присяге; ругаться Перевод слова To empanel, swear in a jury – приводить к присяге присяжного to swear in a witness – привести свидетеля к присяге... ...
38. Attending an Auction Diane: This is so exciting! I’ve never been to an Auction before. Martin: Sit down. It’s about to start. The Auctioneer is on the Podium with her Gavel and she’s... ...
39. Attending an Auction Diane: This is so exciting! I’ve never been to an Auction before. Martin: Sit down. It’s about to start. The Auctioneer is on the Podium with her Gavel and she’s... ...
40. Lying and Telling the Truth Elizabeth: You’re Full of it! Leo: I’m telling you the God’s honest truth. Why would I eat the last piece of cake when I know that you Had your heart... ...