Mrs. Ogden went to her doctor and said

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1. A woman had some problems, so she went to her doctor A woman had some problems, so she went to her doctor of twenty years. They had the following conversation: Dr.: Take the red pill after breakfast with one glass of water. Woman: Ok. Dr: Take the blue pill after lunch with two glasses of water. Woman: Ok. Dr.: Take the yellow pill after dinner with […]...
2. A man takes his 10 year old daughter to the doctor A man takes his 10 year old daughter to the doctor. He says “Doctor, I want to put her on the pill.” The Doctor says “Why?!? Is she sexually active?” The guy says “Nah, she just lies there like her mother.” Sent by soh...
3. Перевод слова juice Juice – сок Перевод слова Juice extractor – соковыжималка digestive juice – желудочный сок freshly squeezed orange juice – свежевыжатый апельсиновый сок She has no Juice left. Она совсем без сил. Add lemon Juice if desired. Добавьте лимонный сок по желанию. Juice oozed out of the plum. Сок, выделяемый из сливы. rel=”nofollow”>...
4. A man comes to a doctor and A man comes to a doctor and, twitching his fingers and stuttering, finally manages to say, “Doctor, I have a sexual performance problem. Can you help me?” “Oh, that’s not a problem for us men anymore!” announces a proud physician, “They just came out with this new wonder drug, Viagra, that does the trick! You […]...
5. Перевод слова pill Pill – таблетка Перевод слова Gilded pill – подслащенная пилюля to be on the pill – принимать противозачаточные таблетки bitter pill to swallow – горькая пилюля, тягостная необходимость headache pill – пилюля от головной боли sugarcoated pill – таблетка, покрытая сладкой оболочкой I took a Pill to relieve my headache. Я принял таблетку, чтобы унять […]...
6. Stop being late to work Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work. His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn’t do something about it. So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went […]...
7. Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning and was always late for work. His boss was mad at him and threatened to fire him if he didn’t do something about it. So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told him to take it before he went […]...
8. How To Give Your Cat a Pill 1. Grasp cat firmly in your arms. Cradle its head on your elbows, just as if you were giving a baby a bottle. Coo confidently, “That’s a nice kitty.” Drop pill into its mouth. 2. Retrieve cat from top of lamp and pill from under sofa. 3. Follow same procedure as in 1, but hold […]...
9. This pill allows you to fly A man went into a bar in a high rise. He saw another man take a pill, take a drink, walk to the window and jump out. He flew around for a minute and zipped back into the bar. As the amazed newcomer watched, the man repeated this twice more. Finally the man asked if […]...
10. Перевод слова orange Orange – апельсин; оранжевый Перевод слова Orange ribbon – оранжевая лента orange grove – апельсиновая роща to squeeze an orange – выжимать сок из апельсина Cut the Orange in half. Разрежьте апельсин пополам. Peel and section the Orange. Очистите от кожуры и разделите апельсин на дольки. The Orange curtains clash with the red furniture. Эти […]...
11. A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had happened to her ears and she answered, “I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang – but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear.” “Oh Dear!” the […]...
12. A doctor, an engineer, and a politician A doctor, an engineer, and a politician were arguing as to which profession was older. “Well,” argued the doctor, “without a physician mankind could not have survived, so I am sure that mine is the oldest profession.” “No,” said the engineer, “before life began there was complete chaos, and it took an engineer to create […]...
13. Describing Symptoms to a Doctor Dr. van Eyck: Good morning, I’m Dr. van Eyck. I understand that you’re not feeling well. Nico: That’s right, doctor. I’ve had a Stomachache for three days. The pain Comes and goes, but I also have Heartburn and I am feeling Bloated all the time. Dr. van Eyck: Well, let’s take a look. Have you […]...
14. Is there a doctor in the house? A strained voice called out through the darkened theater, “Please, is there a doctor in the house?!” Several men stood up as the lights came on. An older lady pulled her daughter to stand next to her, “Good, are any of you doctors single and interested in a date with a good, Jewish girl?”...
15. Перевод слова purpose Purpose – замысел, цель, намерение Перевод слова On purpose – нарочно, с целью beside the purpose – нецелесообразно man of purpose – целеустремленный человек What is the Purpose of your visit? Какова цель вашего визита? You can speak to the Purpose when you choose. Вы можете говорить по существу, когда захотите. He answered him very […]...
16. A man goes to the doctor with a long history of A man goes to the doctor with a long history of migraine headaches. When the doctor does his history and physical, he discovers that his poor patient has had practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and STILL no improvement. “Listen,” says the Doctor, “I have migraines, too and the advice I’m going […]...
17. Диалог на английском языке с переводом “Осмотр у врача” (At the doctor’s) Patient: Good morning, doctor. Doctor: Good morning. How do you feel today? Patient: I feel better today, but I am still of-colour. I`m sleeping badly and I have no appetite. Doctor: A little run-down, I think. Have you checked your temperature today? Patient: Yes, my temperature is quite normal. Doctor: Get to that couch please. […]...
18. A woman was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet A woman was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet. “I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you’ll have lost at least 5 pounds.” When the woman returned, she shocked the doctor by […]...
19. Напитки на английском Dairy Products – молочные продукты 1. milk – молоко 2. low-fat milk – молоко с пониженным содержанием жира 3. skim milk – обезжиренное молоко 4. chocolate milk – шоколадное молоко 5. orange juice – апельсиновый сок 6. cheese – сыр 7. butter – сливочное масло 8. margarine – маргарин 9. sour cream – сметана 10. […]...
20. Перевод слова suck Suck – сосать, высасывать Перевод слова To suck lollipops – сосать леденцы to suck the juice from an orange – высасывать сок из апельсина the pump sucks – насос засасывает воздух I Sucked a cough drop. Я сосал таблетку от кашля. This pump never Sucks. Этот насос никогда не засасывает воздух. The fluid was Sucked […]...
21. Giving Cats Pills INSTRUCTIONS FOR GIVING YOUR CAT A PILL 1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill […]...
22. Last minute requests A man woke up in a hospital bed and called for his doctor. He asked, “Give it to me straight. How long have I got?” The physician replied that he doubted that the man would survive the night. The man then said, “Call for my lawyer.” When the lawyer arrived, the man asked for his […]...
23. A mother-daughter conversation A mother and daughter are sitting down over afternoon tea. The mother wants to show her daughter that she’s a hip parent and tries to get her daughter to open up and talk about dating boys and what it’s like for her. Mom: So….now that you have started dating, what’s it like getting intimate with […]...
24. Crying about life Old Man On A Bench An old man of ninety was sitting on a park bench crying. A policeman noticed this and asked him why he was crying. “Well,” says the old fellow, “I just got married to a twenty-five year old woman. Every morning she makes me a wonderful breakfast, and we have then […]...
25. Значение идиомы drink down [drink down] {v. phr.} To drink in one gulp; swallow entirely. Steve was so thirsty that he drank down six glasses of orange juice in rapid succession....
26. From rescuer to rescued: Doctor and paramedic save each other’s lives 30 years apart When Dr Michael Shannon saved the life of a premature baby 30 years ago, he would never have thought decades later, the favour would be returned. KTLA reported on Sunday the incredible story of two men in California who saved each other’s lives in two very different ways. The news station said that Dr Michael […]...
27. Aunt Dora went to her doctor to see what could be done Aunt Dora went to her doctor to see what could be done about her constipation. “It’s terrible,” she said, “I haven’t moved my bowels in a week.” “I see. Have you done anything about it?” asked the doctor. “Naturally,” she replied, “I sit in the bathroom for a half-hour in the morning and again at […]...
28. Фразовый глагол drop over – перевод и значение, пример использования Фразовый глагол: drop over Перевод: невзначай зайти, посетить, навестить Пример: Drop over any time you feel like talking. Приходи, если захочешь поговорить....
29. Beware of IRS The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1,000.00 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the […]...
30. Traditions A man and a woman got married, and he told her : ” since you are my wife you should respect my traditions and habits…and i have 3 traditions. So, first tradition: On wednesdays i play football with my friends…no matter what..whether it snows or it rains…i dont care..i play football!! -Is it clear for […]...
31. Describing Stomach Problems There’s nothing I enjoy more than spending a couple of hours relaxing at a cafe. I sit drinking my tea and reading. What could be better? Woman: So I think I may have to see a doctor soon. You know I’ve had these terrible pains in my Stomach. My Digestion is terrible and now I […]...
32. A construction worker goes to the doctor and says A construction worker goes to the doctor and says, “Doc, I’m constipated.” The doctor examines him for a minute and then says, “Lean over the table.” The construction worker leans over the table, the doctor whacks him on the ass with a baseball bat, and then sends him into the bathroom. He comes out a […]...
33. Getting an Unexpected Marriage Proposal Sean: By now, I think you know how I feel about you. I’m Madly in love with you and I believe In my heart of hearts that you’re my Soul mate. Ayako: That’s really Sweet of you to say. Sean: And because I feel the way I do, I would like to ask you a […]...
34. A Short History of Medicine I have an earache… 2000 B. C. – Here, eat this root. 1000 A. D. – That root is heathen. Here, say this prayer. 1850 A. D. – That prayer is superstition. Here, drink this potion. 1940 A. D. – That potion is snake oil. Here, swallow this pill. 1985 A. D. – That pill […]...
35. Перевод слова daughter Daughter – дочь; порождение, отпрыск Перевод слова Only daughter – единственная дочь daughter card – плата более низкого уровня daughter company – дочерняя компания Stay away from my Daughter! Держись подальше от моей дочери! Can your Daughter count yet? Ваша дочь уже умеет считать? The United States is a Daughter of Great Britain. Великобритания – […]...
36. Значение идиомы on the rocks [on the rocks] {adj. phr.} 1. {informal} Wrecked or ruined. Mr. Jones’ business and marriage were both on the rocks. 2. With iceonly. At the restaurant, Sally ordered orange juice on the rocks....
37. One day there was an indian chief who was constipated One day there was an indian chief who was constipated. he sent one of his warriors to the witch doctor to get some medicine. The warrior says “Big Chief, no shit”. the doctor gave him 1 pill and told him that the chief should be fine tomorrow. The warrior went back to the chief and […]...
38. A man went to the doctor for a check up A man went to the doctor for a check up. “How do you feel?” asked the doctor. “Fine.” he replied. After a few more general health questions the doctor asked, “How many times do you have sex per month?” “About two or three.” the man replied. “You should be doing better than that.” the doctor […]...
39. The daughter of an Indian chief visits his doctor The daughter of an Indian chief visits his doctor. She tells the doctor “Big Chief no fart.” The doctor tells her to give him three pills a day. The girl comes back the next day and tells the doctor, “Big Chief no fart.” The doctor then gets really worried and tells her to give him […]...
40. Перевод сленгового выражения juice, значение и пример использования Сленговое выражение: juice Перевод: 1. электричество; топливо 2. энергия, сила 3. стероиды, анаболики Пример: After that storm the juice in these houses is off. После шторма в этих домах нет электричества. I’m out of juice after that five mile run. После того, как я пробежал эти пять миль, у меня совсем нет сил. It has […]...