How to Hunt Elephants — Comp Sci Style

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1. How to Hunt Elephants — Math styleMathematicians hunt elephants by going to Africa, throwing out everything that is not an elephant, and catching one of whatever is left. Professors of mathematics prove the existence of at least one elephant and leave the capture of an actual elephant as an exercise for one of their graduate students. Sent by Alex...
2. How to Hunt Elephants — Sales StyleSalespeople don’t hunt elephants but spend their time selling elephants they haven’t caught, for delivery two days before the season opens. Software salespeople ship the first thing they catch and write up an invoice for an elephant. Hardware salespeople catch rabbits, paint them gray and sell them as «desktop elephants.» Sent by Alex...
3. How to Hunt Elephants — VP StyleWhen the Vice President of R&D tries to hunt elephants, his staff will try to ensure that all elephants are completely prehunted before he sees them. If the VP sees a nonprehunted elephant, the staff will (1) Compliment the vice president’s keen eyesight and (2) enlarge itself to prevent any recurrence. Sent by Alex...
4. How to hunt elephants — Lawyers styleHow to hunt elephants — Lawyer’s style Lawyers don’t hunt elephants, but they do follow the herds around arguing about who owns the droppings. Software lawyers will claim that they own an entire herd based on the look and feel of one dropping. Sent by Alex...
5. Elephants IXEvery nation has to write a book about the Elephant: The French book — The Sex Life of the Elephant or: 1000 ways to cook Elephant The English book — Elephants I have shot on Safari The Welsh book — The Elephant and its influence on Welsh language and culture or: Oes ysgol tocynnau eleffant ... Читать далее...
6. The best book on elephantsThe UN sponsored a competition on which nation can produce the best book on elephants. The British submited a dry historical account «The Elephant and the British Empire.» The French submited a text «The Sensuality of the Elephant — a Personal Account.» The Germans submited 47 Volumes entitled «An Elementary Introduction to the Foundation of ... Читать далее...
7. Elephants IIIHow do you get an elephant into the fridge? 1. Open door. 2. Insert elephant. 3. Close door. How do you get a giraffe into the fridge? 1. Open door. 2. Remove elephant. 3. Insert giraffe. 4. Close door. How do you know there are *two* elephants in your fridge? The door won’t close. How ... Читать далее...
8. Elephants found to understand human pointing without trainingA study by researchers from the University St Andrews has found that elephants are the only wild animals that can understand human pointing without being trained. In the study, published in Current Biology, the researchers show that a group of 11 captive Zimbabwean elephants, which were used to following vocal instructions but weren’t trained to ... Читать далее...
9. Refrigerate elephantsAnalysis: 1. Differentiate it and put into the refrig. Then integrate it in the refrig. 2. Redefine the measure on the referigerator (or the elephant). 3. Apply the Banach-Tarsky theorem. Number theory: 1. First factorize, second multiply. 2. Use induction. You can always squeeze a bit more in. Algebra: 1. Step 1. Show that the ... Читать далее...
10. Перевод слова huntHunt — охота, преследование; охотиться, ловить Перевод слова Fox hunt — охота на лис the hunt is up — преследование началось to hunt for wolf — охотиться на волков The police are still Hunting the killer. Полиция все еще разыскивает убийцу Wolves Hunt in packs. Волки охотятся стаями. The kids were Hunting for shells on ... Читать далее...
11. Значение идиомы hunt and peck[hunt and peck] {n. phr.}, {informal} Picking out typewriter keysby sight, usually with one or two fingers; not memorizing the keys. Many newspaper reporters do their typing by hunt and peck. — Oftenused, with hyphens, as an adjective. Mr. Barr taught himself totype, and he uses the hunt-and-peck system....
12. Elephants recognize the voices of their enemiesAfrican elephants can distinguish human languages, genders and ages associated with danger. Humans are among the very few animals that constitute a threat to elephants. Yet not all people are a danger — and elephants seem to know it. The giants have shown a remarkable ability to use sight and scent to distinguish between African ... Читать далее...
13. Значение идиомы hunt up[hunt up] {v.} To find or locate by search. When John was inChicago, he hunted up some old friends. The first thing Fred hadto do was to hunt up a hotel room....
14. Значение идиомы witch-hunt[witch-hunt] {n. phr.} A hysterical movement during which peopleare persecuted for having views considereddifferent or unpopular. During the McCarthy era many innocentAmericans were accused of being Communists, as Republican patriotismdeteriorated into a witch-hunt....
15. How to Catch a White ElephantHow to Catch a White Elephant ============================= Submitted By Niels Kristian Jensen Go to an place where there are white elephants. Bring with you a muffin (with raisins). Climb a tree. When the white elephant is close, drop the muffin (with raisins) in front of it. The white elephant will be happy, and eat the ... Читать далее...
16. Перевод идиомы head hunt, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: head hunt Перевод: «охотиться за головами»; заниматься поиском высококвалифицированных специалистов, узконаправленных работников Пример: The headhunters are looking for good computer programmers. Охотники за головами ищут хороших программистов....
17. Перевод слова orderlyOrderly — упорядоченный, опрятный, организованный Перевод слова Orderly room — опрятная комната orderly mind — дисциплинированный ум orderly class — организованный класс orderly listing — упорядоченное перечисление orderly close-down — нормальное завершение работы orderly march — организованный марш He was incapable of arranging his thoughts in Orderly symmetrical pigeonholes. Он был неспособен упорядочить свои мысли ... Читать далее...
18. A fair warningTourist guide at zoo: «Ladies and gentlemen, this is the elephant, the largest animal to roam the lands. Every day the elephant eats 3 dozen bunches of bananas, 6 tons of hay, and 2000 pounds of assorted fruits. Madam, please don’t stand near the elephant’s backside…. Madam, PLEASE don’t stand near the elephant’s backside… MADAM… ... Читать далее...
19. Africa ‘witnessing birth of a new ocean’A 60km crack opened in Ethiopia in 2005 and has been expanding ever since Africa is witnessing the birth of a new ocean, according to scientists at the Royal Society. Geologists working in the remote Afar region of Ethiopia say the ocean will eventually split the African continent in two, though it will take about ... Читать далее...
20. Перевод слова elephantElephant — слон Перевод слова Work elephant — рабочий слон he can’t hit an elephant — он и в слона-то не попадет an elephant in a china shop — неуклюжий и бестактный человек The passerby was trampled by an Elephant. Прохожего затоптал слон. They nearly equalled the Elephant in size. По размеру они почти сравнялись ... Читать далее...
21. Tarzania IIWhat is the difference between en elephant and a plum? An elephant is grey. What does Jane say when she sees a herd of elephants in the distance? «Look! A herd of plums in the distance» (Jane is colorblind)...
22. Ex-NBA Star Yao Ming Aims to Wean China Off Ivory and Shark FinsBEIJING — Former NBA all-star center Yao Ming is now dishing out assists to much wilder targets. After retiring from the Houston Rockets in 2011, Yao returned to China and set out to end his homeland’s traditional appetite for endangered and threatened animal products. As an ambassador for international conservation organization WildAid, Yao has campaigned ... Читать далее...
23. This man goes into the doctor with hisThis man goes into the doctor with his ringhole in a terrible state, really bad now. Doctor: «What happened to you?» He says: «I was in Africa on safari and I got raped by an elephant!» Doctor: «But I don’t understand. Elephant penises are very narrow and couldn’t cause that much damage!» He says «Aah ... Читать далее...
24. Значение идиомы run with the hare and hunt with the hounds[run with the hare and hunt with the hounds] {v. phr.} Toappear to support both parties in a conflict; to conduct things inambiguous ways. Critics accused the king of running with the hareand hunting with the hounds....
25. Значение идиомы hunt down[hunt down] {v.} 1. To pursue and capture; look hard for an animalor person until found and caught. The police hunted down theescaped prisoner. Compare: TRACK DOWN. 2. To search for until one finds it. Professor Jones hunted down the writtenmanuscript in the Library of Congress. Syn.: TRACK DOWN....
26. Father, mother and son decide to go to the zoo one dayFather, mother and son decide to go to the zoo one day. So they set off and are seeing lots of animals. Eventually they end up opposite the elephant house. The boy looks at the elephant, sees its willy, points to it and says, «Mummy, what is that long thing?» His mother replies, «That, son, ... Читать далее...
27. Nice, but roughAn elephant was having a horrible time in the jungle because a horsefly kept biting near her tail and there was nothing she could do about it. It was far out of reach. A sparrow saw this and killed the horsefly with its beak. «Oh, thank you!» said the elephant. «My, pleasure ma’am.» said the ... Читать далее...
28. A change of styleTwo men were changing in the locker room after a game of tennis. One notices the other one is putting on pair of stockings and suspenders. He says «When did you start wearing them?» To which the other man replies «Since my wife found a pair on the back seat of the car.»...
29. Wounded elephant seeks help from safari lodge after being shot by poachersAn alarming sight to be sure — Ben, an injured bull elephant, approached the lodge to ask for help. IF YOU need further proof that elephants are highly-intelligent animals, this is it. Ben, an injured bull elephant — thought to be 30-years-old — gave staffers at the Bumi Hills Safari Lodge in Kariba, Zimbabwe the ... Читать далее...
30. Значение идиомы old world[old world] {n. phr.} Europe, the continent; a continental manner. Tom had an old world manner that thoroughly charmed all theladies. Compare: OLD COUNTRY....
31. ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEETS WINDOWS95ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEETS WINDOWS95 Costello: Hey, Abbott! Abbot: Yes, Lou? Costello: I just got my first computer. Abbot: That’s great Lou. What did you get? Costello: A Pentium II-266, with 40 Megs of RAM, a 2.1 Gig hard drive, and a 24X CD-ROM. Abbot: That’s terrific, Lou. Costello: But I don’t know what any ... Читать далее...
32. Cook James — Джеймс КукJames Cook was born in Yorkshire on Oct. 27, 1728, into a poor family. At the age of 18 he found employment with a shipowner in his native village of Whitby and made several voyages to the Baltic Sea. When the Anglo-French war broke out in 1755, he enlisted in the Royal Navy and saw ... Читать далее...
33. Перевод слова mannerManner — манера, поведение; метод, способ Перевод слова In the same manner as… — таким же образом, как… in like manner — подобным образом modest manner — скромное поведение friendly in manner — обходительный She replied to me in a very rude Manner. Она ответила мне очень грубо. Do it in such Manner. Сделай это ... Читать далее...
34. Перевод слова AfricaAfrica — Африка Перевод слова Sons of Africa — африканцы in the darkest Africa — в самых глухих уголках Африки impoverishment of Africa — рост бедности в африканских странах The film is set in Africa. Действие фильма происходит в Африке. Development Fund for Africa. Фонд развития Африки....
35. There once was a baby elephant and a baby turtleThere once was a baby elephant and a baby turtle drinking from a river deep in the jungle. For no reason, the turtle reaches over and bites the elephant’s tail, really hard. Years and years later, the same elephant, now grown up, is by the same river, having a drink with his giraffe buddy, when ... Читать далее...
36. Willy’s rolling down the hall of a retirement homeWilly’s rolling down the hall of a retirement home acting like he’s driving a car, an orderly turns the corner and asks Willy what he’s doing. Willy replies, «I’m going to Chicago for the weekend.» The orderly chuckles and enters Bob’s room to check on him. He catchs Bob pleasuring himself, when asked what he ... Читать далее...
37. There were two bulls, a young one named George and an old one named SamThere were two bulls, a young one named George and an old one named Sam. It was that time of year to satisfy the local female population, and young George was pretty excited. «Sam, Sam, can I go down to those heifers over there?» asked George. «George, relax. Here is how it works. We’ll wait ... Читать далее...
38. South Africa — Южная АфрикаI am going to tell you about South Africa, one of the English speaking countries. Southerly Africa, officially Republic of South Africa, is situated at the southern tip of the continent of Africa. South Africa borders on Namibia to the north-west, Botswana and Zimbabwe to the north, and Mozambique and Swaziland to the north-east and ... Читать далее...
39. An ant and an elephant share a night of romanceAn ant and an elephant share a night of romance. Next morning the ant wakes up and the elephant is dead. «Damn», says the ant, «one night of passion and I spend the rest of my life digging a grave!»...
40. Перевод слова continentContinent — континент, материк; сдержанный Перевод слова Continent championships — чемпион континента deep in the continent — в глубь суши continent-wide — охватывающий весь континент Their shops are among the most stylish on the Continent. Их магазины среди самых модных на континенте. The famine affected half the Continent. Голод охватил половину континента. As the land ... Читать далее...