Homework

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1. HomeworkВ топике Домашнее задание автор приводит аргументы «за и против» слишком больших по объему домашних заданий. Конечно, чем больше учиться и повторять материал, тем легче будет поступить в ВУЗ. Но, проводя много времени, выполняя домашнее задание, можно потерять в общении с друзьями, испортить зрение и т. п. Вывод: объем домашнего задания должен быть оптимальным, за ... Читать далее...
2. One day, little Billy comes home from kindergartenOne day, little Billy comes home from kindergarten for lunch. Not finding his mother in the kitchen, or the living room, he heads upstairs to check her bedroom. He opens the door, and what does he see, but his father, who had also come home for lunch, stripped naked, on top of his mother, also ... Читать далее...
3. The homework scheduleHere is an explanation of the school homework policy for the average student. Students should not spend more than ninety minutes per night. This time should be budgeted in the following manner if the student desires to achieve moderate to good grades in his/her classes. 15 minutes looking for assignment. 11 minutes calling a friend ... Читать далее...
4. A woman went down to the Welfare Office to get aidA woman went down to the Welfare Office to get aid. The office worker asked her, «How many children do you have?» «Ten,» she replied. «What are their names?» he asked. «LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, LeRoy, and LeRoy,» she answered. «They’re all named LeRoy?» he asked «What if you want them ... Читать далее...
5. State of Arkansas Residency ApplicationState of Arkansas Residency Application Name: ________________ (_) Billy-Bob (last) (_) Billy-Joe (_) Billy-Ray (_) Billy-Sue (_) Billy-Mae (_) Billy-Jack (Check appropriate box) Age: ____ Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ N/A Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right Occupation: (_) Farmer (_) Mechanic (_) Hair Dresser (_) Un-employed Spouse’s Name: Relationship with spouse: (_) Sister ... Читать далее...
6. Billy was 14 and just started jerkin offBilly was 14 and just started jerkin off. He loved to jerk off. However, one day, his dad walked in on him while he was jerkin off! Billy was so embarrassed. He pulled up his pants as quick as he could. But, his dad already seen him. «Billy,» said his dad, «doing that will make ... Читать далее...
7. An elderly woman entered a large furniture storeAn elderly woman entered a large furniture store and was greeted by a much younger salesman. «Is there something in particular I can show you?» he asked. «Yes, I want to buy a sexual sofa.» «You mean a sectional sofa,» he suggested. «Sectional schmectional.» she bitterly retorted. «All I want is an occasional piece in ... Читать далее...
8. My dog ate my homework«Johnny, where’s your homework?» Miss Martin said sternly to the little boy while holding out her hand. «My dog ate it,» was his solemn response. «Johnny, I’ve been a teacher for eighteen years. Do you really expect me to believe that?» «It’s true, Miss Martin, I swear,» insisted Johnny. «I had to force him, but ... Читать далее...
9. Two mountain bred GIs were wandering the streetsTwo mountain bred GIs were wandering the streets of calcutta when an old woman walked by. «Hey, Billy Joe,» one said, «I think that’s Mother Teresa.» «Your nuts.» «I’m telling you.» They approached the woman and one asked, «Are you Mother Teresa?» The old lady eyed them scornfully. «Fuck off, you goddamn perverts,» she hissed, ... Читать далее...
10. Значение идиомы within call[within call] or [within hail] {adv. phr.} 1. Near enough to heareach other’s voices. When the two ships were within hail, theirofficers exchanged messages. Billy’s mother told him to staywithin call because supper was nearly ready. 2. In a place where youcan be reached by phone, radio, or TV and be called. The sick manwas ... Читать далее...
11. Топик «Образование в России» (Education in Russia)Словарь Exception [ɪkˈsepſ(ə)n] — исключение; Compulsory [kəmˈpʌlsərɪ] — обязательно; Skill [skɪl] — мастерство; To depend [dɪˈpend] — зависить; Mandatory [ˈmændətərɪ] — обязательный; Education is an important part of modern life. Originally Russian education starts from the early age. Children can start going to kindergarten from the age of two, but this is not a compulsory ... Читать далее...
12. Дистанционное обучение/ Distant LeaningНа английском языке Перевод на русский язык Distant Leaning Дистанционное обучение Most of people go to school in their childhood, it is our basic education. But still there are some people who didn’t go to school, but got their education at home. This is called distant learning. Distant learning is when a child doesn’t go ... Читать далее...
13. One summer evening during a violent thunderstormOne summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, «Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?» The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. «I can’t dear,» she said. «I ... Читать далее...
14. A word playA teacher asked her students to use the word «fascinate» in a sentence. Mary said, «My family went to the New York City Zoo, and we saw all the animals. It was fascinating.» The teacher said, «That was good, but I wanted the word «‘fascinate.'» Sally raised her hand. She said, «My family went to ... Читать далее...
15. A story with a moralWhile they were taking up the collection, John leaned forward and said, «Hey, Marie, how about you and me go to dinner next Friday?» «Why Yes, John, that would be nice,» said Marie. Well, John couldn’t believe his luck. All week long he polished up his car, and on Friday he picked up Marie and ... Читать далее...
16. Hiring an accountantKowalski, fresh out of accounting school, went to a interview for a good paying job. The company boss asked various questions about him and his education, but then asked him, «What is three times seven?» «Twenty-two,» Kowalski replied. After he left, he double-checked it on his calculator (he knew he should have taken it to ... Читать далее...
17. As a sergeant in a parachute regimentAs a sergeant in a parachute regiment I took part in serveral night time excersises. Once, I was seated next to a Lieutenant fresh from Jump School. He was quiet sad looked a bit pale so I struck up a conversation. «Scared, Lieutenant?», I asked. He replied, «No, just a bit apperhensive.» I asked, «What’s ... Читать далее...
18. I think I try a nicer approachEvery night, after dinner, a man took off for the local tavern. He spent the whole evening there, and arrived home very drunk around midnight each night. He always had trouble getting his key into the keyhole and getting the door opened. His wife, waiting up for him, would go to the door and let ... Читать далее...
19. Clinton died and was standing at hte Pearly GatesClinton died and was standing at hte Pearly Gates. After knocking at the gates, St. Peter appeared. «Who goes there?» inquired St. Peter. «‘It’s me, Bill Clinton.» «And what do you want?» asked St. Peter. «Lemme in!» replied Clinton. «Soooo,» pondered Peter. «What bad things did you do on earth?» Clinton thought a bit and ... Читать далее...
20. One day a lady went to the doctors officeOne day a lady went to the doctor’s office and told the doctor that her husband wasn’t interested in her any more he just wouldn’t have sex with her anymore. So the doctor went into the back of the shop and got a bottle of 100 pills. He told her that «if you give your ... Читать далее...
21. Anybody Home?A boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employee’s home phone number and was greeted with a child’s whispered, «Hello?» Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to the youngster, the boss asked, «Is ... Читать далее...
22. Education in GB and USA — Образование в Великобритании и СШАEducation is very important for every person. It gives information and opportunities for further life. Every country has its own, unique system of education. We can note examples of many different systems, but I think the most developed and popular are: education system in the USA, the education system in Great Britain, as the most ... Читать далее...
23. Education in RussiaCitizens of Russia have the right for education which is guaranteed by the Constitution. The public educational system in our country incorporates pre-school, general school, specialized secondary and higher education. Pre-school consists of kindergartens and creches. Children there learn reading, writing and arithmetic. But pre-school education isn’t compulsory — children can get it at home. ... Читать далее...
24. What Not to Name Your DogEverybody has a dog called Rover or Spot. I call my dog «Sex». When I went to city hall to buy a licence I told the clerk I wanted a licence for Sex. He said «I’d like one too.» But then I said «This is a dog.» He said he didn’t care what she looked ... Читать далее...
25. A boy comes home from school and tells his motherA boy comes home from school and tells his mother that he got a part in the school play. «What part?» the mother asked. «I play a Jewish husband,» the boy replied. «Go back to school and tell your teacher that you want a speaking role!»...
26. The Bachelor DietMonday Breakfast — Who can eat Breakfast on a Monday? Swallow some toothpaste while brushing your teeth Lunch — Send your secretary out for six «gutbombers» — those little hamburgers that used to cost a dime but now cost sixty five cents. Also order French fries, a bowl of chilli, a soft drink and have ... Читать далее...
27. The newly married man came home from workThe newly married man came home from work to find his new bride stretched languorously on the sofa, dressed in a negligee. «Guess what I got planned for dinner?» she asked seductively. «And don’t you dare tell me you had it for lunch today.»...
28. The bachelor’s dietBachelor’s Diet MONDAY: BREAKFAST — Who can eat breakfast on a Monday? Swallow some toothpaste while brushing your teeth LUNCH — Send your secretary out for six «gutbombers» those little hamburgers that used to cost a dime but now cost sixty five cents. Also order French fries, a bowl of chili, a soft drink and ... Читать далее...
29. A business man got on an elevator in a buildingA business man got on an elevator in a building. When he entered the elevator, there was a blonde already inside and she greeted him by saying, «T-G-I-F» (letters only). He smiled at her and replied, «S-H-I-T» (letters only).» She looked at him, puzzled, and said, «T-G-I-F» again. He acknowledged her remark again by answering, ... Читать далее...
30. Education in KazakhstanThe educational system in Kazakhstan is conducted in two languages — Kazakh and Russian and consists of several levels of state and private educational establishments: infant schools, elementary (or primary) schools, comprehensive schools, colleges and academies. The constitution of the Republic of Kazakhstan fixes the right of citizens of the republic on free-of-charge secondary education ... Читать далее...
31. A little boy was excited about his first day at schoolA little boy was excited about his first day at school. So excited in fact, that only a few minutes after class started, he realized that he desperately needed to go to the bathroom. So he raised his hand politely to ask if he could be excused. Of course the teacher said yes, but asked ... Читать далее...
32. A woman was thinking about finding a petA woman was thinking about finding a pet to help keep her company at home. She decided she would like to find a beautiful parrot; it wouldn’t be as much work as say a dog, and it would be fun to hear it speak. She went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large ... Читать далее...
33. On the occasion of their fiftieth wedding anniversary, Billy-BobOn the occasion of their fiftieth wedding anniversary, Billy-Bob decided to forego a big party and treat Linda-Sue to a memorable evening at home. Quietly filling the bathtub with champagne, he called her into the bathroom and they spent a sensual evening soaking in the tub by candlelight. When they were finished, Billy-Bob decided he ... Читать далее...
34. My DayВ топике Мой день я рассказываю об обычном буднем дне, который начинается в 7 часов утра, когда я просыпаюсь. Как всегда – зарядка, гигиенические процедуры и завтрак. Я посещаю школу 5 дней в неделю, у нас по 6-7 уроков в день, и я возвращаюсь домой в 3 часа дня, обедаю, отдыхаю и иду на прогулку ... Читать далее...
35. Перевод слова homeworkHomework — домашнее задание; надомная работа Перевод слова To do homework — учить уроки to beaver away at one’s homework — делать уроки algebra homework — домашнее задание по алгебре His wife tries to eke out their scanty income by Homework. Его жена пытается пополнить их скудные доходы надомной работой. Did you finish your Homework? ... Читать далее...
36. Education in the USAAmericans place a high value on education. Universal access to quality education has been one of the nation’s historic goals. Americas first college, Harward was founded in 1636. In 1865 education was becoming available to all. The peculiar feature of American education is the absence of national administration. Each of the 50 states controls and ... Читать далее...
37. Значение идиомы call it a day[call it a day] {v. phr.} To declare that a given day’s work has been accomplished and go home; to quit for the day. «Let’s call it a day,» the boss said, «and go out for a drink.» It was nearly midnight, so Mrs. Byron decided to call it a day, and left the party, ... Читать далее...
38. A talking FrogA man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, «If you kiss me, I’ll turn into a beautiful princess.» He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, «If you kiss me and turn me back ... Читать далее...
39. A psychology student at a local universityA psychology student at a local university was sent on a field assignment to evaluate three patients in a local mental hospital. The first patient was locked in his room throwing tennis balls everywhere. The student asked why, and the patient answered «When I get out of here I going to ba a tennis pro.» ... Читать далее...
40. A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologistA beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took one look at this woman and all his professionalism went out the window. He immediately told her to undress. After she had disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. Doing so, he asked her, «Do you know what I’m doing?» «Yes,» she replied, ... Читать далее...