A rather well proportioned young lady, Joan, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of the hotel.
She wore a bathing suit the first day but, on the second, being a naturist, she decided that no one could see her way up there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan.
She’d hardly begun when she heard someone running up the stairs. She was lying on her stomach, so she just pulled a towel over her rear.
«Excuse me, miss,» said the flustered little assistant manager of the hotel, out of breath from running up the stairs.
«The hotel doesn’t mind you sunbathing on the roof but we would very much appreciate you wearing a bathing suit as you did yesterday.»
«What difference does it make,» Joan asked rather calmly.
«No one can see me up here, and besides, I’m covered with a towel.»
«Not exactly,» said the embarrassed little man. «You’re lying on the dining room skylight.»
Topic my university.
My home topic.
Related topics:
- Перевод слова roofRoof — крыша Перевод слова Fence roof — навес high-pitched roof — высокая и крутая крыша to install a roof — устраивать крышу A Roof leaks. Крыша течет. He jumped off the Roof. Он спрыгнул с крыши. I burned the Roof of my mouth. Я обожгла себе небо....
- Значение идиомы raise the roof[raise the roof] {v. phr.}, {informal} 1. To make a lot of noise;be happy and noisy. The gang raised the roof with their singing. 2. To scold loudly. Mother raised the roof when she saw the dog’smuddy footprints on her new bedspread. Compare: KICK UP A FUSS, RAISECAIN....
- An older Jewish gentleman marries a younger ladyAn older Jewish gentleman marries a younger lady and they are very much in love. However, no matter what the husband does sexually, the woman never achieves orgasm. Since a Jewish wife is entitled to sexual pleasure, they decide to ask the rabbi. The rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the ... Читать далее...
- Перевод сленгового выражения raise the roof, значение и пример использованияСленговое выражение: raise the roof Перевод: веселиться и очень шуметь Синоним: pump it up Пример: We’re going to raise the roof at Stephanie’s party tonight! Сегодня вечером на вечеринке у Стефани мы хорошо повеселимся! The band raised the roof with one great song after another. Группа очень веселилась и они сильно шумели, исполняя песню за ... Читать далее...
- Перевод слова stairStair — лестница, ступенька Перевод слова Flight of stairs — лестничный марш above stairs — в жилых комнатах; «наверху» below stairs — в кухне и в помещении для прислуги The Stairs are steep. Эта лестница крутая. The Stairs lead to the roof. Эта лестница ведет на крышу. He waited at the foot of the Stairs. ... Читать далее...
- LearningA man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry her right away. She said, «But we don’t know anything about each other.» He said, «That’s all right, we’ll learn about each other as we go along.» So she consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a very ... Читать далее...
- Перевод слова towelTowel — полотенце Перевод слова Hand towel — полотенце для рук linen towel — льняное полотенце roller towel — бумажное полотенце в рулоне to damp a towel — намочить полотенце I’ll get a Towel for you. Я принесу тебе полотенце. She dried her hands on the kitchen Towel. Она вытерла ее руки кухонным полотенцем. Undress ... Читать далее...
- Kiss meyeah!«Kiss me,» said the young lady urgently. «Please kiss me.» But the young man turned his head away, saying, «Of course not. How can I? I’m your own brother-in-law. Hell, we shouldn’t even be lying here making love.»...
- So there were two guys on a roof, pounding nailsSo there were two guys on a roof, pounding nails. One guy pounded a nail in, then picked up another. He was holding the nail upside down. He unexpectedly threw the nail away. He picked up another nail, right side up this time, and pounded this in. He eventually threw so many upside down nails ... Читать далее...
- Sweet, Sweet Road RageAn elderly lady was stopped to pull into a parking space when a young man in his new red Mercedes went around her and parked in the space she was waiting for. The little old lady was so upset that she went up to the man and said, «I was going to park there!» The ... Читать далее...
- Perfect customerA man wrote a letter to a small hotel in a midwest town he planned to visit on his vacation. He wrote, «I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with ... Читать далее...
- Перевод сленгового выражения hit the ceiling / hit the roof, значение и пример использованияСленговое выражение: hit the ceiling / hit the roof Перевод: очень разозлиться, выйти из себя, буйно себя вести Пример: The third time we were late for class, our teacher hit the ceiling. Когда мы опоздали на уроки в третий раз, наша учительница просто взбесилась....
- Following a Dress CodeTae: What are you doing? Why are you taking all of my clothes out of my suitcase? I just finished Packing that. Nicole: You’ve packed all of the wrong things. We’re going on a Luxury cruise and all you’ve packed are shorts and t-shirts. Tae: I’m going on vacation and I don’t have To dress ... Читать далее...
- It was the age when knighthood was in flowerIt was the age when knighthood was in flower. A young lady was pounding away at a piece of iron with a sledgehammer. Another young lady saw her and asked, «What are you doing?» The first one answered, «I’m making socks and sweater for some soldier boy!»...
- A young lady asked the Scotsman what he wore under his kiltA young lady asked the Scotsman what he wore under his kilt. «Reach up there and find out.» She did, but quickly pulled her hand back out and said, «Oh, it’s gruesome!» «Aye, it has,» replied the Scotsman, «and if you put your hand back up there, it’ll grow some more!»...
- The young couple was engaged in a most affectionateThe young couple was engaged in a most affectionate embrace when there came the sound of a key in the front door. The young lady broke away at once, eyes wide with alarm. «Heavens,» she cried, «it’s my husband! Quick, jump out the window.» The young man, equally alarmed, made a quick step toward the ... Читать далее...
- A Jewish lady named Mrs. RosenbergA Jewish lady named Mrs. Rosenberg who many years ago was stranded late one night at a fashionable resort — one that did not admit Jews. The desk clerk looked down at his book and said, «Sorry, no room. The hotel is full.» The Jewish lady said, «But your sign says that you have vacancies.» ... Читать далее...
- Перевод слова ladyLady — леди, женщина Перевод слова Great lady — знатная дама you’ve dropped your gloves, lady! — женщина, вы обронили перчатки! foxy lady — соблазнительная женщина your good lady — ваша супруга Shall we rejoin the Ladies? Не вернуться ли нам к дамам? She’s swell, a real Lady. Она одевается стильно, как настоящая леди. Don’t ... Читать далее...
- A young lady walks into a doctors officeA young lady walks into a doctors office. «Doctor I’m suffering from a terrible discharge» The Doctor lays her down lifts up her dress and has a good probe around and says «how does that feel?» Young lady, «Oooh doctor that feels lovely….. …but the discharge is from my ear!!»...
- Using Caffeine as a StimulantJoan: Hi, how are you? What are you doing? What is this? Roberto: Whoa! You’re very High-strung this morning. Joan: Am I? I am a little Wired. I’ve been Up all night trying to finish an assignment for one of my classes. Roberto: You don’t seem tired at all for having been up all night. ... Читать далее...
- A veterinarian surgeonA veterinarian surgeon had had a hell of a day, but when he got home from tending to all the sick animals his wife was waiting with a long cool drink and a romantic candle-lit dinner, after which they had a few more drinks and went happily to bed. At about 2:00 in the morning, ... Читать далее...
- The doctor had just completed his examinationThe doctor had just completed his examination of the gorgeous redhaired beauty. «I would suggest to you, young lady,» began the medic, as he regained som of his professional dignity, «that you discontinue some of your running around. Stop drinking so much, cut down on your smoking, and above all you will have to start ... Читать далее...
- It is worth tryingA very well-built young lady was lying on her psychiatrist’s couch, telling him how frustrated she was. «I tried to be an actress and failed,» she complained. «I tried to be a secretary and failed; I tried being a writer and failed; then I tried being a sales clerk and I failed at that, too.» ... Читать далее...
- Перевод слова vacationVacation — отпуск, каникулы, освобождение Перевод слова Christmas vacation — рождественские каникулы vacation of a position — уход с поста; отставка to take a vacation — брать отпуск, уходить в очередной отпуск She was away on Vacation. Она уехала в отпуск. Did you have a good Vacation? Хорошо ли вы провели отпуск? I got a ... Читать далее...
- Eat oystersA lady went running to a doctor with a badly spoiled stomach. «What did you eat for dinner last night?» asked the doctor. «Oysters,» she said. «Fresh oysters?» asked the doctor. «How should I know?» said the lady «Well,» asked the doctor, «couldn’t you tell when you took off the shells?» «My Gosh,» gasped the ... Читать далее...
- A policeman was patrolling near midnightA policeman was patrolling near midnight at a local parking spot overlooking a golf course. He drove by a car and saw a couple inside with the dome light on. Inside there was a young man in the driver’s seat reading a computer magazine and a young lady in the back seat calmly knitting. He ... Читать далее...
- A wife, arriving home from a shopping trip, was horrified toA wife, arriving home from a shopping trip, was horrified to find her husband in bed with a lovely young woman. Just as the wife was about to storm out of the house, her husband stopped her with these words: Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all came about. Driving along ... Читать далее...
- Returning from her vacationReturning from her vacation, the young secretary was telling anyone who would listen about what a fun time she had. She then asked for two weeks leave in which to get married. «But you just had two weeks off,» said the boss. «Why didn’t you get married then?» «What and ruin my vacation?» she whined....
- A very Insulting ParrotThis elderly lady, recently widowed, decides to see if a pet will ease her loneliness and goes to the pet store. She decides against puppies, kitties, etc., and is about to leave the store when she hears a voice saying, «My, do you look lovely this afternoon, madam.» She turns around quickly to see who ... Читать далее...
- The hotel Astor had hired a new bus driverThe hotel Astor had hired a new bus driver and instructed him to meet all incoming trains and announce at the depot in a very loud voice, «Free bus to the hotel Astor!» On the way to the station on his first trip her kept repeating to himself, «Free bus to the hotel Astor, Free ... Читать далее...
- A little boy and his dad are standing in lineA little boy and his dad are standing in line at the grocery store behind a big fat lady. The little boy says, «hey dad, look how fat that lady is!» «Shhhh, quiet son, she’ll hear you.» «But dad, look how big and fat that lady is!» «Shhhhhh, don’t say that son, it’s not nice!» ... Читать далее...
- Smart decisionTwo gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked ... Читать далее...
- How Army policy beganThis is Army policy all begins… Start with a cage containing five apes. In the cage, hang a banana on a string and put stairs under it. Before long, an ape will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the Banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the apes ... Читать далее...
- Перевод идиомы throw / toss in the sponge / towel, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: throw / toss in the sponge / towel Идиома: throw / toss in the sponge / towel разг. Перевод: признать себя побежденным, признать свое поражение, сдаться, прекратить попытки, прекратить всякое сопротивление Пример: The boxer threw in the towel about halfway through the match. Боксер сдался примерно в середине матча. Don’t throw in the towel. ... Читать далее...
- Getting Plastic SurgeryGeorge: What are you doing? Joan: I’m looking through these magazines to try and decide which Plastic surgery procedures I should have next year. George: You’re not thinking of Going under the knife. Joan: Yes, I am. I’ve always wanted to improve on the way I look, and I’m tired of these Wrinkles and Sagging ... Читать далее...
- Berkowitz is having a drink at his hotelBerkowitz is having a drink at his hotel when he spots a beautiful young woman at the other end of the bar. «Bartender,» he says, «give that lady whatever she likes, and put it on my tab.» When the drink is delivered, the woman gives Berkowitz a warm smile. A moment later he’s at her ... Читать далее...
- The Plumber has arrivedA lady was expecting the plumber; he was supposed to come at ten o’clock. Ten o’clock came and went; no plumber; eleven o’clock, twelve o’clock, one o’clock; no plumber. She concluded he wasn’t coming, and went out to do some errands. While she was out, the plumber arrived. He knocked on the door; the lady’s ... Читать далее...
- The young lady entered the doctor’s office carrying an infantThe young lady entered the doctor’s office carrying an infant. «Doctor,» she explained, «the baby seems to be ailing. Instead of gaining weight, he lost three ounces this week.» The medic examined the child and then started to squeeze the girl’s breasts. He then unbuttoned her blouse, removed the bra and began powerfully sucking on ... Читать далее...
- Перевод идиомы as well as, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: as well as Перевод: в дополнение к чему-либо; также, тоже Пример: Please bring your swimming suit as well as your towel. Возьмите с собой, пожалуйста, костюм для плавания, а также полотенце....
- A buxom blonde wore, at a charity ball, an enormous diamondA buxom blonde wore, at a charity ball, an enormous diamond. «It happens to be the third most famous diamond in the whole world,» she boasted. «The first is the Hope Diamond, then comes the Kohinoor, and then comes this one, which is called Lipshitz.» «What a diamond!» «How lucky you are!» «Wait, wait, nothing ... Читать далее...
Great roof