Giving CPR

Joyce: Lie down on the floor.

Steve: Why?

Joyce: I have to practice for my CPR exam tomorrow. I’m taking it so I can get my CPR Certification. Lie down please.

Steve: Okay, okay. Now what do I do?

Joyce: You just lie there and pretend to be Unresponsive, like you’re in Cardiac arrest. Okay, I need to determine your Heart rate and if you’re Breathing or not. Then, I check to see that your Airway isn’t Blocked.

Steve: Hey, get your fingers out of my mouth!

Joyce: Lie Still! You’re lucky I don’t have to administer Artificial respiration.

Steve: Thank God for small favors!

Joyce: But I do need to practice Restoring your Circulation by doing Chest compressions.

Steve: Ouch, that hurts!

Joyce: You’re supposed to be unresponsive, remember? Hold still while I get the Defibrillator.

Steve: Oh, no, you don’t! From now on, As far as you’re concerned, I’m a case of Do not resuscitate!

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