Communication problem

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1. A dog walks into a butcher shopA dog walks into a butcher shop with a purse strapped around his neck. He walks up to the meat case and calmly sits there until it’s his turn to be waited on. A man, who was already in the butcher shop, finished his purchase and noticed the dog. The butcher leaned over the counter ... Читать далее...
2. Communication ProblemsEthel: Can we talk? Fred: Uh-huh. Ethel: I don’t think we Communicate very well. We don’t talk to each other like we used to. I think we need to have a Dialogue about these Dysfunctional communication Patterns. Fred: Hmm. Ethel: I think we need to work on our relationship. We have a strong Foundation, but ... Читать далее...
3. Buying Meat from a ButcherButcher: Good morning. What can I get for you? Samantha: I’d like some Lamb chops, Pork chops, and some Beef, but I’m not sure which Cuts I want yet. Butcher: You’ve come to the right Butcher shop. Everything here is Fresh. Everything comes straight from the Slaughterhouse. Samantha: Um, I’m glad to hear that. Butcher: ... Читать далее...
4. Nonverbal CommunicationLanguage plays a commanding role as a means of communication. When we communicate with other people, we use our facial expression, eye contact, body movement, intonation, volume of voice, clothing, body decoration, time, space and many other ways to transmit information. Such means of communication without words are called nonverbal communication. People had developed nonverbal ... Читать далее...
5. A perfect choiceA woman who had been married twice and divorced twice was fed up. Her first husband beat her, and her second husband ran away with another woman. Plus, she couldn’t find a new lover who could satisfy her sexually, so she put an ad in the classifieds: Wanted: A good looking, single guy who won’t ... Читать далее...
6. At the Butcher’sButcher: What can I get for you? Gina: I’d like a pound of Ground beef, please. Butcher: Would you like the regular or the extra Lean? The extra lean is a dollar more per pound. Gina: I’ll take the regular. Could you also Throw in two thick Pork chops and two Chicken breasts? Butcher: I’m ... Читать далее...
7. At the Butcher’sButcher: What can I get for you? Gina: I’d like a pound of Ground beef, please. Butcher: Would you like the regular or the extra Lean? The extra lean is a dollar more per pound. Gina: I’ll take the regular. Could you also Throw in two thick Pork chops and two Chicken breasts? Butcher: I’m ... Читать далее...
8. A middle aged man and woman fall in love, and decide to get marriedA middle aged man and woman fall in love, and decide to get married. On their wedding night they settle into the bridal suite and the bride says to her new groom, «Please be gentle… I am still a virgin.» The startled groom says «How can that be? You’ve been married twice…» The bride responds… ... Читать далее...
9. Перевод слова porkPork — свинина Перевод слова Pork pie — пирог со свининой belly pork — грудинная свинина pork carcass — свиная туша Let me have a plateful of that Pork! Положите мне полную тарелку свинины! Powdered beef and Pork imported from Ireland. Солонина и свинина, импортируемые из Ирландии. We’re having Pork roast for dinner. У нас ... Читать далее...
10. A supermarket had a sale on boneless chicken breastsA supermarket had a sale on boneless chicken breasts, and a woman I know intended to stock up. At the store, however, she was disappointed to find only a few skimpy prepackaged portions of the poultry, so she complained to the butcher. «don’t worry, ya,» he said. «I’ll pack some more trays and have them ... Читать далее...
11. Together againMaria is a devout Catholic. She gets married and has 17 children. Then her husband dies. She remarries two weeks later, and has 22 children by her next husband. Then he dies. A while later, she dies. At the funeral, the priest looks skyward and says, «At least they’re finally together.» A guy sitting in ... Читать далее...
12. Перевод слова AsianAsian — азиатский, азиат Перевод слова Asian countries — страны Азии asian option — азиатский опцион central asian shepherd — среднеазиатская овчарка Is there a generic Asian mind? Существует ли типичное азиатское мышление? Two thirds of the pupils are of Asian origin. Две трети школьников имеют азиатское происхождение....
13. Перевод слова gentlemanGentleman — джентельмен, господин Перевод слова He is a gentleman — он порядочный человек he is one of nature’s gentlemen — в нем есть прирожденное благородство gentleman’s agreement — джентльменское соглашение Ladies and Gentlemen! Дамы и господа! He deported himself like a Gentleman. Он вел себя как истинный джентльмен. Show this Gentleman how to get ... Читать далее...
14. Marriage quotes 03There was a man who said, «I never knew what happiness was until I got married… and then it was too late!» Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock. They say when a man holds a woman’s hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage, it is self-defense. When a ... Читать далее...
15. An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise shipAn old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat on tight, so that it would not blow off in the wind. A gentleman approached her and said: «Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this ... Читать далее...
16. Back in the good ole days in TexasBack in the good ole days in Texas, when stage coaches and the like were popular, there were three people in a stage coach one day: a true red blooded born and raised Texas gentleman, a tenderfoot city slicker from back East, and a beautiful and well endowed Texas lady. The city slicker kept eyeing ... Читать далее...
17. A young lady had just visited her doctorA young lady had just visited her doctor and he informed her that she was pregnant. The young lady had been married for ten years and had wanted a baby very badly. As she sat on the bus, on her way home, she felt that she had to share the good news with someone. The ... Читать далее...
18. Man needs a turkeyIt’s the day before Thanksgiving, and the butcher is just locking up when a man begins pounding on the front door. «Please let me in,» says the man desperately. «I forgot to buy a turkey, and my wife will kill me if I don’t come home with one.» «Okay,» says the butcher. «Let me see ... Читать далее...
19. Marriage quotes 05Dear Mrs, Mr, Miss, or Mr and Mrs Daneeka: Words cannot express the deep personal grief I experienced when your husband, son, father or brother was killed, wounded, or reported missing in action. — Catch-22 Diplomat: A man who can convince his wife she would look stout in a fur coat. Don’t marry for money; ... Читать далее...
20. The dog and the butcherA dog ran into a butcher shop and grabbed a roast off the counter. Fortunately, the butcher recognized the dog as belonging to a neighbour of his. The neighbour happened to be a lawyer. Incensed at the theft, the butcher called up his neighbour and said, «Hey, if your dog stole a roast from my ... Читать далее...
21. Who’s got a bigger crotch?There were three women sitting in a bar and they were discussing how much their husbands could get up their crotch. The first women said, «My husband can get his whole hand up me». The second lady said, «My husband can get his whole head up me». The third lady slid down the bar stool....
22. English is the Language of CommunicationТопик Английский язык является языком общения — расскажет, что изучение иностранных языков необходимо в настоящее время. Но самым распространенным и важным для общения людей разных национальностей является английский язык. На нем говорят во всем мире и это официальный язык Великобритании, Ирландии, Соединенных Штатов Америки, Канады, Австралии. Зная английский язык, вы можете без проблем путешествовать по ... Читать далее...
23. Drums in communicationDeveloped and used by cultures living in forested areas, drums served as an early form of long-distance communication, and were used during ceremonial and religious functions. In Africa, New Guinea and the tropical America, people have used drum telegraphy to communicate with each other from far away for centuries. When European expeditions came into the ... Читать далее...
24. An older woman was in the pastoral studyAn older woman was in the pastoral study counceling for her upcoming fourth wedding. «Father,» she said, «How am I going to tell my husband that I am still a virgin?» «My child, you have been a married woman for many years. Surely that cannot be,» he replied. «Well Father, my first husband was a ... Читать далее...
25. You Can Never Really Go BackYou Can Never Really Go Back There was this couple who had been married for 50 years. They were sitting at the breakfast table that morning when the old gentleman said to his wife, «Just think, honey, we’ve been married for 50 years.» «Yeah,» she replied, «Fifty years ago this very day, we were sitting ... Читать далее...
26. A LIGHTER LOOK AT MARRIAGEGetting married is very much like going to a continental restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that. At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, «Aren’t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?» The other replied, ... Читать далее...
27. Значение идиомы salt pork[salt pork] {n.} Very fat pork that has been packed in salt ordipped in brine for curing. Mother cooked beans with salt pork forsupper....
28. A couple gets married, and thirty years later they’reA couple gets married, and thirty years later they’re in the same hotel, in the same room. She takes off all her clothes, lies back on the bed, and spreads her legs. Her husband starts to cry. She says, «What’s the matter?» He says, «Thirty years ago I couldn’t wait to eat it. Now it ... Читать далее...
29. An Avon lady was along in an elevator when she suddenlyAn Avon lady was along in an elevator when she suddenly had to fart. She promptly reached into her bag and sprayed the air with her deodorizer. Two floors later a gentleman got onto the elevator. He began to sniff. The Avon lady asked, «Do you smell something?» «Why, yes, I do,» he replied. «What ... Читать далее...
30. There was a man and woman traveling along in their carThere was a man and woman traveling along in their car. The man was driving when a police officer pulls them over. The officer walks up to the window and says «Did you know you were speeding back there.» The lady (who is almost deaf) said to her husband «What did he say, what did ... Читать далее...
31. TV Shows Being Renewed and CancelledMo: I have some bad news: Your favorite TV show has been Cancelled. Amy: I’m not surprised. Ratings plummeted last Season, so The writing was on the wall. Mo: Also On the chopping block is your favorite reality show: American Idiots. Amy: Oh no, not American Idiots, too! I thought it was Gaining ground in ... Читать далее...
32. A little girl and a little boy were at day careA little girl and a little boy were at day care one day. The girl approaches the boy and says, «Hey Tommy, wanna play house?» He says, «Sure! What do you want me to do?» The girl replies, «I want you to communicate your thoughts.» «Communicate my thoughts?» said a bewildered Tommy. «I have no ... Читать далее...
33. What Not to Name Your DogEverybody has a dog called Rover or Spot. I call my dog «Sex». When I went to city hall to buy a licence I told the clerk I wanted a licence for Sex. He said «I’d like one too.» But then I said «This is a dog.» He said he didn’t care what she looked ... Читать далее...
34. Man and wife at the zooIt’s a beautiful warm spring day and a man and his wife are at the zoo. She’s wearing a cute, loose-fitting, pink spring dress, sleeveless w/straps. As they walk through the ape exhibit and pass in front of a very large gorilla, the gorilla goes ape. He jumps up on the bars, holding on w/one ... Читать далее...
35. An older Jewish gentleman marries a younger ladyAn older Jewish gentleman marries a younger lady and they are very much in love. However, no matter what the husband does sexually, the woman never achieves orgasm. Since a Jewish wife is entitled to sexual pleasure, they decide to ask the rabbi. The rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the ... Читать далее...
36. Перевод слова communicateCommunicate — говорить, общаться Перевод слова To communicate with one’s neighbour — общаться с соседом to communicate by telephone — связаться по телефону communicate to — передавать We Communicated mostly by e-mail. Мы общались в основном по e-mail. I shall Communicate with you direct. Я сразу же свяжусь с вами. The rooms Communicate. Эти комнаты ... Читать далее...
37. Means of CommunicationТопик Транспорт рассказывает обо всех видах транспорта, которые использует современный человек. Особое внимание уделяется транспорту Лондона — городу, в котором было построено первое в мире метро и появились первые трамваи. И еще Лондон знаменит своими ярко-красными двухэтажными автобусами – даблдекерами или омнибусами. People use various means of communication to get from one place to another. ... Читать далее...
38. Read — it’s funAn elderly gentleman… Had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to a doctor who was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100% The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, ‘Your hearing is ... Читать далее...
39. English is the Language of Communication — Английский язык — язык общения«Do you speak English?» — with this phrase begins the conversation between two people, that speak different languages and want to find a common language. It’s very good when you hear: «Yes, I do», and start talking. People of different countries and nations have to get along well with the progress in world trade and ... Читать далее...
40. Card gamesA cleaning woman was applying for a new position. When asked why had she left her previous employment, she replied, «Yes, sir, they paid good wages, but it was the most ridiculous place I ever worked. Last night they played a game called Bridge and a lot of folks were there. As I was about ... Читать далее...