Chem one-liners 04

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1. Chem one-liners 01Organic chemistry is the chemistry of carbon compounds. Biochemistry is the study of carbon compounds that crawl. — Mike Adams Chemicals: Noxious substances from which modern foods are made. Remember, if you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate! There is the joke about the homeopath who forgot to take his medicine ... Читать далее...
2. Chem one-liners 03Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium and just couldn’t put it down? What’s the formula for water? — H-two-O What’s the formula for an ice cube? — H-two-O-CUBED Q: What do you get when you combine Al Gore with O2? A: Oxymoron The best chemists would ... Читать далее...
3. Chem one-liners 02Q: How many physical chemists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Only one, but he’ll change it three times, plot a straight line through the data, and then extrapolate to zero concentration. «A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold.» Isaac Asimov said that if you want to ... Читать далее...
4. Перевод слова chemistryChemistry — химия Перевод слова Organic chemistry — органическая химия agricultural chemistry — агрохимия chemistry experiment — химический опыт She professes organic Chemistry. Она преподает органическую химию. The Chemistry test was a bear. Тест по химии был очень трудным. Chemistry is a closed book to me. Химия для меня — это закрытая книга....
5. Importing Goods to the U. SDaniel: You look like you’re Sitting on pins and needles. Muriel: I am. I’m waiting to hear if our Goods have Cleared customs yet. We’re in big trouble if our 50 Crates aren’t Released soon. Daniel: You’ve filled out the proper Paperwork. What could go wrong? Muriel: You have no idea how much Red tape ... Читать далее...
6. Chemistry song 07Test Tubes Bubbling (to the tune of «Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire») Test tubes bubbling in a water bath Strong smells nipping at ypur nose . Tiny molecules with their atoms all aglow Will find it hard to be inert tonight. They know that Chlorine’s on its way He’s loaded lots of little electrons ... Читать далее...
7. Thrown out of the labTop Ten ways to get thrown out of chemistry lab 10. Pretend an electron got stuck in your ear, and insist on describing the sound to others. 9. Give a cup of liquid nitrogen to a classmate and ask, «Does this taste funny to you?» 8. Consistently write three atoms of potassium as «KKK.» 7. ... Читать далее...
8. Chemistry song 01The Chemistry Teacher’s Coming to Town You better not weigh You better not heat You better not react I’m telling you now The Chemistry Teacher’s coming to town. He’s collecting data He’s checking it twice He’s gonna find out The heat of melting ice The Chemistry Teacher’s coming to town. He sees you when you’re ... Читать далее...
9. One liners about foodThe snack bar next door to an atom smasher was called «The Fission Chips.» On April Fools Day, a mother put a fire cracker under the pancakes. She blew her stack. A new chef from India was fired a week after starting the job. He keep favoring curry. A couple of kids tried using pickles ... Читать далее...
10. Business one-liners 02A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours. — Milton Berle A committee is twelve men doing the work of one. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking. A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually. — Abba Eban A conservative is ... Читать далее...
11. The math one linersMath problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)^2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x]. If parallel lines meet at infinity — infinity must be a very noisy place with all those lines crashing together! Maths Teacher: Now suppose the number of sheep is x… Student: Yes sir, but what happens if the number of sheep is not x? Zenophobia: the irrational fear of convergent sequences. ... Читать далее...
12. Business one-liners 01A President of a democracy is a man who is always ready, willing, and able to lay down your life for his country. A backscratcher will always find new itches; a brown-noser will always find new sense. A bad day fishing is better than a good day at work. A bird in the bush usually ... Читать далее...
13. Chemistry song 11Chemistry Wonderland Gases explode, are you listenin’ In your rest tube, silver glistens A beautiful sight, we’re happy tonight Walking in a chemistry wonderland. Gone away, is the buoyancy Here to stay, is the density A beautiful sight, we’re happy tonight Walking in a chemistry wonderland. In the beaker we will make lead carbonate and ... Читать далее...
14. Chemistry is boringIT’S OFFICIAL : CHEMISTRY LECTURES ARE A YAWN. October 9, 1995 A scientist has come up with proof of something students have known for years — chemistry lectures are boring. In an article published in the current issue of Chemistry in Britain, a university chemistry lecturer introduced a guest lecturer to a class of 50 ... Читать далее...
15. Значение идиомы out of print[out of print] {adj. phr.} No longer obtainable from the publisherbecause the printed copies have been sold out; no longer printed. The book is out of print. An edition of one thousand copies was soldand no more copies were printed. Compare: OUT OF STOCK. Contrast: INPRINT....
16. Привидения/ GhostsНа английском языке Перевод на русский язык Ghosts Привидения In every culture there are myths and legends which tell stories about supernatural creatures, ghosts. It is considered that ghost or phantom is a spirit of dead man who has an unfinished business or as some sources tell angry spirit which is eager to revenge. In ... Читать далее...
17. Значение идиомы kindled spirits[kindled spirits] {n. phr.} People who resemble each other innumerous ways, including their ways of thinking and feeling. Theyare kindred spirits; they both like to go on long walks in theforest....
18. Love JesusBy Dennis DiPasquale The other day I went to the local religious book store, where I saw a HONK IF YOU LOVE JESUS bumper sticker. I bought it and put it on the back bumper of my car, and I’m really glad I did. What an uplifting experience followed. I was stopped at the light ... Читать далее...
19. Перевод слова scienceScience — наука, естественные науки Перевод слова Physics, chemistry and other sciences — физика, химия и другие естественные науки materials science — материаловедение exact science — точная наука pure science — чистая наука Science has taught us how atoms are made up. Наука научила нас тому, как устроены атомы. The computer is one of the ... Читать далее...
20. Перевод идиомы (to be) in high spirits, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: (to be) in high spirits Перевод: быть в хорошем расположении духа Пример: They are in high spirits since their home team won the tournament. У них хорошее настроение, потому что команда из их города выиграла чемпионат....
21. Let him digAn old man and woman were married for years even though they hated each other. When they had a confrontation, screams and yelling could be heard deep into the night. A constant statement was heard by the neighbors who feared the man the most. «When I die I will dig my way up and out ... Читать далее...
22. Chemistry song 06Quantum Chemistry On the first day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: An exam in Quantum Chemistry. On the second day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: a double integral and an exam in Quantum Chemistry. On the third day of Christmas, my professor gave to me: three orbitals, a double integral, and ... Читать далее...
23. Перевод идиомы in good spirits, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: in good spirits Перевод: в хорошем расположении духа, в хорошем настроении Пример: Everyone was in good spirits when they went to the beach for a picnic. Все были в приподнятом настроении, когда пошли на пляж на пикник....
24. Chemistry song 05The Twelve Days of Chemistry On the first day of chemistry My teacher gave to me A candle from Chem Study. (second day) two asbestos pads (third day) three little beakers (fourth day) four work sheets (fifth day) five golden moles (sixth day) six flaming test tubes (seventh day) seven unknown samples (eighth day) eight ... Читать далее...
25. Who has the right of way when four cars approachQ: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time? A: The pickup truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, «Guns don’t kill people. I do.»...
26. Important thoughts*Question: What is one horsepower? *Answer: One horsepower is the amount of energy it takes to drag a horse 500 feet in one second. *You can listen to thunder after lightening and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don’t hear it you got hit, so never mind. *Talc is found on ... Читать далее...
27. The Wisdom of Youth Never give upThe Wisdom of Youth Never give up because life gets harder as you get older. After preschool the road of life keeps getting bumpier and bumpier and bumpier. Angela Martin, age 11 Never blow in a cat’s ear because if you do, usually after three or four times, they will bite your lips! And they ... Читать далее...
28. Перевод слова freeFree — свободный, вольный; бесплатный Перевод слова Free people — свободный народ free choice — свободный выбор tickets are given free — билеты раздаются бесплатно free currency — свободно конвертируемая валюта Have you any rooms Free? Есть ли у вас свободные комнаты? I haven’t got a Free day this week. У меня нет выходных на ... Читать далее...
29. Значение идиомы in print[in print] {adj. phr.} Obtainable in printed form from a printer orpublisher; printed. The author has finished writing his book but itis not yet in print. The story of the students’ trip to Washingtonappeared in print in the newspaper. It is a very old book and nolonger in print. Contrast: OUT OF PRINT....
30. Перевод слова kindKind — вид, тип, разновидность; добрый, хороший Перевод слова The wrong kind of paper — не такая бумага, как нужно the wolf is an animal of the dog kind — волк относится к семейству псовых the human kind — род человеческий kind person — добрый человек It’s Kind of you to say that. Очень мило ... Читать далее...
31. A man is driving down the freewayA man is driving down the freeway when he sees a sign that says; «Get gas and free sex here». So obviously the guy was interested, so he stopped, filled up went inside to pay. «Pick a number from 1 — 10 to get free sex.» said the cashier. «Uh, okay, 3!» the man replied. ... Читать далее...
32. Ideas About ScienceThe beguiling ideas about science quoted here were gleaned from essays, exams, and classroom discussions. Most were from 5th and 6th graders. They illustrate Mark Twain’s contention that the ‘most interesting information comes from children, for they tell all they know and then stop. Q: What is one horsepower? A: One horsepower is the amount ... Читать далее...
33. A Traffic JamI was on my way to a restaurant to meet my date for dinner when I hit a Traffic jam. I saw that the road was Congested, but since I had to take the Bridge to reach downtown, I Had no choice but to stay on that road. The traffic was Bumper-to-bumper. One crazy driver ... Читать далее...
34. Mega moron awardsMEGA MORON AWARDS Tennessee: A man successfully broke into a bank after hours and stole the bank’s video camera, while the camera was remotely recording. (That is, the videotape recorder was located elsewhere in the bank, so he didn’t get the videotape of himself stealing the camera). Louisiana: A man walked into a Circle-K, put ... Читать далее...
35. Значение идиомы make free with[make free with] {v.} 1. To take or use without asking. Bob makes free with his roommate’s clothes. A student should notmake free with his teacher’s first name. 2. To act toward in a rude or impolite way. The girls don’t like Ted because hemakes free with them. Compare: TAKE LIBERTIES....
36. The hotel Astor had hired a new bus driverThe hotel Astor had hired a new bus driver and instructed him to meet all incoming trains and announce at the depot in a very loud voice, «Free bus to the hotel Astor!» On the way to the station on his first trip her kept repeating to himself, «Free bus to the hotel Astor, Free ... Читать далее...
37. Being ScaredEmily: I’m not going into that house. It’s supposed to be Haunted. Stephen: Come on. Don’t be a Coward. You don’t believe in Ghosts, do you? Emily: I don’t, but I’m not Taking any chances. Just look at that house! It’s Spooky. I’m getting Goosebumps just looking at it. Stephen: You’re only Freaking out because ... Читать далее...
38. An old occupationWhat happens when people of different occupations get old. — Old accountants never die, they just lose their balance. — Old actors never die, they just drop apart. — Old archers never die, they just bow and quiver. — Old architects never die, they just lose their structures. — Old bankers never die, they just ... Читать далее...
39. The energy of atomsNuclear energy comes from the energy inside each atom. Atoms are made up of a nucleus with protons and neutrons-and electrons which revolve around the nucleus like the earth goes around the sun. Nuclear fission An atom’s nucleus can be split apart. When this is done, a lot of energy is released. Albert Einstein, the ... Читать далее...
40. Значение идиомы free-for-all[free-for-all] {n.} 1. Unlimited, free access to somethingeverybody wants. The Smith’s party was a lavish free-for-all;everybody could eat and drink as much as they wanted. 2. A barroom, tavern, or street fight in which everybody participates. Thecelebration after the soccer game victory turned into anuncontrollable free-for-all....