A man was driving through West Virginia

Related topics:

1. There is a guy from ARMY driving from West Point to the MeadowlandsThere’s a guy from ARMY driving from West Point to the Meadowlands, a guy from the NAVY was driving from Annapolis to the Meadowlands, and an Air Force guy who’s driving from McGwire in South Jerz to the Meadowlands just to watch the Jets. In the middle of the night with no other cars on ... Читать далее...
2. Virginia JokesVirginia: Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don’t Mix? — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — Virginia: Please don’t confuse us ... Читать далее...
3. Перевод слова westWest — запад, к западу, на запад Перевод слова Geographic west — географический запад to travel west — ехать на запад west of Moscow — к западу от Москвы The route lay to the West. Дорога простиралась на запад. The route then heads West over Gerrick Moor. Затем маршрут вел на запад через Gerrick Moor. ... Читать далее...
4. Driving home very drunkIt seems a gentleman had too much alcohol at a party, was heading home, and was pulled over by a state trooper. Upon being tested, the fellow couldn’t walk a straight line any more than he could drive one, so the trooper wrote out a ticket and had just given it to the driver before ... Читать далее...
5. Dangerous Freeway DrivingI do a lot of driving in my job. You would think that driving several hours Each way would Get old really fast, but I have ways of making an Interminable drive seem much more exciting. I like to drive fast on the freeways. I usually Pass all of the slower cars by staying in ... Читать далее...
6. California Driving Test AnswersThe following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation’s driving school (read at Saturday Traffic School for moving violation offenders.) Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road? A: What for? He can’t see my license plate. Q: Who has the right ... Читать далее...
7. A bus filled with politicians was driving through theA bus filled with politicians was driving through the countryside one day, on the campaign trail. The bus driver, caught up in the beautiful scenery, loses control and crashes into the ditch. A farmer living nearby hears the horrible crash and rushes out to discover the wreckage. Finding the politicians he buries them. The next ... Читать далее...
8. Juggler, driving to his next performanceJuggler, driving to his next performance, was stopped by the police. ‘What are those knives doing in your car?’ asked the officer. ‘I juggle them in my act.’ Oh yeah?’ says the cop. ‘Let’s see you do it.’ So the juggler starts tossing and juggling the knives. A guy driving by sees this and says, ... Читать далее...
9. An easy solutionOn a plane bound for New York the flight attendant approached a blonde sitting in the first class section and requested that she move to coach since she did not have a first class ticket. The blonde replied, «I’m blonde; I’m beautiful; I’m going to New York; and I’m not moving.» Not wanting to argue ... Читать далее...
10. Driving school testThe following are a sampling of real answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation’s driving school. Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road? A: What for? He can’t see my license plate. Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop ... Читать далее...
11. Значение идиомы screw around[screw around] {v. phr.}, {vulgar}, {avoidable} To hang around idlywithout accomplishing anything, to loaf about, to beat or hack around. You guys are no longer welcome here; all you do is screw around allday....
12. A man was walking down the street when he noticedA man was walking down the street when he noticed his grandpa sitting on the porch, in the rocking chair, with nothing on from the waist down. «Grandpa, what are you doing?» he exclaimed. The old man looked off in the distance and did not answer him. «Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here ... Читать далее...
13. Driving in Great Britain — Вождение в ВеликобританииWelcome to the free Tourist Information Line for visitors to Great Britain. For information on visas and immigration, please press one. For information on driving in Britain, please press two. For information on hotels, please press three. For information on public transport in Britain, please press four. To return to this menu at any time ... Читать далее...
14. Пословица / поговорка East or West home is best — перевод и значение, пример использованияПословица / поговорка: East or West home is best Перевод: в гостях хорошо, а дома лучше Пример: During the last couple of years we’ve been to many place around the world, but I’ve come to know one thing: East or West home is best. В течение последней пары лет мы много где в мире побывали, ... Читать далее...
15. Two nuns were driving alone out in the booniesTwo nuns were driving alone out in the boonies. They ran out of gas. Fortunately they could walk to a gas station not far away, where they asked to purchase a can of gasoline. «I’m sorry, sister,» said the attendant, «but all I have for you to carry it in is an old chamber pot. ... Читать далее...
16. A ventriloquist was driving in the countryA ventriloquist was driving in the country when he was attracted to a large farm. He asked for and was given a tour. As he was shown through the barn, the ventriloquist thought he’d have some fun. He proceeded to make one of the horses talk. The hired hand, wide-eyed with fear, rushed from the ... Читать далее...
17. During training exercises, the lieutenant driving downDuring training exercises, the lieutenant driving down a muddy back road encountered another car stuck in the mud with a red faced colonel at the wheel. «Your jeep stuck, sir?» asked the lieutenant as he pulled alongside. «Nope,» replied the colonel, coming over and handing him the keys, «*Yours* is.»...
18. A cattleman from West Texas diedA cattleman from West Texas died & went on to the Great Beyond. As he approached the great gate, he noticed that the terrain was bare with no greenery. He remarked to the gate keeper, «Howdy Saint Peter. Say, this looks just like Texas.» «The gatekeeper replied, «First of all, I’m not Saint Peter and ... Читать далее...
19. Two guys are driving through Texas whenTwo guys are driving through Texas when they get pulled over by a state trooper. The trooper walks up, taps on the window with his nightstick, the driver rolls down the window, and the trooper smacks him in the head with the stick. The driver says, «Why’d you do that? The trooper says, «You’re in ... Читать далее...
20. A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped byA juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police. «What are these matches and lighter fluid doing in your car?» asks the cop. «I’m a juggler and I juggle flaming torches in my act.» «Oh yeah?» says the doubtful cop. «Lets see you do it.» The juggler gets out and starts juggling ... Читать далее...
21. There was this little boy who went in the whore houseThere was this little boy who went in the whore house with a dead frog on a leash. He went to the counter and asked the pimp for a whore with aids, the man knew he was young but the boy said «please mister, just give me a whore with aids, i have money thats ... Читать далее...
22. A man was driving up a steep and narrow mountain roadA man was driving up a steep and narrow mountain road. A woman was driving down the same road. As they passed each other, the woman leaned out the window and yelled, «Pig!» The man immediately leaned out his window and replied, «Bitch!» They continue on their way and as the man rounded the next ... Читать далее...
23. Значение идиомы move a muscle[move a muscle] {v. phr.} To move even a very little. — Used innegative sentences and questions and with «if». The deer stoodwithout moving a muscle until the hunter was gone. The girls wereso startled that they did not move a muscle. You’re sitting rightwhere you were when I left! Have you moved a muscle? ... Читать далее...
24. Seems that the traveling salesman was driving in the countrySeems that the traveling salesman was driving in the country and his car broke down. He hiked several miles to a farm house, and asked the farmer if there was a place he could stay over night. «Sure,» said the farmer, «my wife died several years ago, and my two daughters are 21 and 23 ... Читать далее...
25. Перевод слова screwScrew — шуруп, винт, гайка; завинчивать Перевод слова To screw on the cap — навинчивать крышку to ease off screw — ослаблять винт adjustable screw-wrench — раздвижной гаечный ключ The lid Screws onto the jar. Эта крышка навинчивается на банку. Screw the lid on clockwise. Закрутите крышку по часовой стрелке. Try and undo the Screw ... Читать далее...
26. Do this while drivingStrange and silly things to do while driving. We do not advise doing any of the below «things to do while driving», as all driving should be taken seriously. The below «things to do while driving» are simply here for entertainment purposes. Vary your vehicle’s speed inversely with the speed limit. Roll down your windows ... Читать далее...
27. This guy was driving down the highwayThis guy was driving down the highway and was pulled over by the cops. The cop asked the man for his name and the guy replied, «Earl.» «You got a last name, Earl?» «Nope. It’s a long story, Officer.» «I got time.» Earl sighs and says, «Well, Officer, at first I was known as Earl ... Читать далее...
28. Перевод идиомы be in the driving seat, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: be in the driving seat Идиома: be in the driving seat Перевод: находиться у руля, держать рычаги власти, иметь контроль над ситуацией Пример: The consumer is in the driving seat due to the huge range of goods on the market. Потребитель имел весь контроль над ситуацией из-за огромного выбора товаров на рынке....
29. Driving DirectionsI was Getting into my car at the mall when I noticed a man standing Nearby with a map. He looked confused and I asked him if I could help. He Looked up and was Clearly relieved. He was from Houston, Texas, he told me, and he was visiting his daughter. She was at work ... Читать далее...
30. Driving DirectionsI was Getting into my car at the mall when I noticed a man standing Nearby with a map. He looked confused and I asked him if I could help. He Looked up and was Clearly relieved. He was from Houston, Texas, he told me, and he was visiting his daughter. She was at work ... Читать далее...
31. Don’t do while drivingWe do not advise following any of the below driving rules to any extent. Driving should be taken seriously at all times. The below jokes are simply here for entertainment purposes. When using a metered entrance ramp, vehicles in the carpool lane do not need to stop. Similarly, vehicles NOT in the diamond lane also ... Читать далее...
32. Mary was having an affair during the day whileMary was having an affair during the day while her husband, John, was at work. One day she was in bed with her boyfriend, Ralph, and she heard her husband’s car pull in the driveway. She yelled at Ralph: «Hurry! Grab your clothes and jump out the window my husband is home early!» Ralph looked ... Читать далее...
33. Drinking and drivingThe following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. The «Environmental Engineering News» published some rather sobering information about punishment for drunk driving convictions in other countries. In Australia, the names of drunk drivers are printed in newspapers under the caption, ... Читать далее...
34. An attractive woman from New York was driving through a remoteAn attractive woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Texas when her car broke down. An Indian on horseback came along and offered her a ride to a nearby town. She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off. The ride was uneventful except that every few minutes ... Читать далее...
35. A guy was driving home one eveningA guy was driving home one evening when he suddenly realizes that it is his daughter’s birthday and that he hasn’t bought her anything. Out the corner of his eye he sees a shopping mall. Knowing it was «now or never», he pulls his car through three lanes of traffic, finds a parking bay and ... Читать далее...
36. A man was driving from New York to San FranciscoA man was driving from New York to San Francisco. He got as far as Cleveland, when he realized he was getting terribly horny. So he looked up a house of ill repute and took care of the problem. Immediately, a severe guilt reaction set in, so he went to confession. For penance, he was ... Читать далее...
37. There was a farmer, sitting on the front porch of his houseThere was a farmer, sitting on the front porch of his house this one hot summer day, when this kid comes walking down the road carrying a big bundle of wire. «Hey kid!» the farmer says. «Where ya goin’ with that wire?» «Well,» the kid drawls, «this here ain’t just any ol’ wire, this here’s ... Читать далее...
38. One day a guy was driving with his 4-year-old daughterOne day a guy was driving with his 4-year-old daughter and beeped his car horn by mistake. She turned and looked at him for an explanation. He said, «I did that by accident.» She replied, «I know that, daddy.» He replied, «How’d you know?» The girl said, «Because you didn’t say ‘ASSHOLE!’ afterwards!»...
39. Judi was bored with driving her BMWJudi was bored with driving her BMW. It laced individuality and besides that, every other girl in the office had one. She fancied something a bit more individual, perhaps an MG convertible. That week she visited her local car dealer and spied a beautiful Jaguar XK140 convertible. It was wonderfully restored and she fell in ... Читать далее...
40. Значение идиомы on the move[on the move] {adj.} or {adv. phr.} 1. Moving around from place toplace; in motion. It was a very cold day, and the teacher watchingthe playground kept on the move to stay warm. It was vacationtime, and the highways were full of families on the move. 2. Movingforward; going somewhere. The candidate promised that if ... Читать далее...