Two guys are out hunting deer

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1. Two guys go huntingTwo guys go hunting. Jerry has never gone hunting while Joe has hunted all his life. When they get to the northern Wisconsin woods, Joe tells Jerry to sit by a tree and not make a sound while Joe checks out a deer stand. After he gets about a quarter of a mile away, Joe ... Читать далее...
2. A guy takes his greenhorn wife hunting on a ranchA guy takes his greenhorn wife hunting on a ranch. When they reach their deer blinds, the guy says, «If you shoot a deer, be sure not to let somebody else say he’s the one who shot it. Otherwise, he’ll take the deer from you. The deer belongs to whoever shoots it.» The guy goes ... Читать далее...
3. Two guys were out hunting, but they weren’tTwo guys were out hunting, but they weren’t getting any ducks. «What do you think the problem is?» one man asked his companion. «I dunno,» came the reply, «Maybe we aren’t throwing the dog up high enough.»...
4. Two Polish guys went away on their annual hunting expeditionTwo Polish guys went away on their annual hunting expedition, and by accident one was shot by the other. His worried companion got him out of the deep woods, into the car, and off to the nearest hospital. «Well, Doc,» he inquired anxiously, «is he going to make it?» «It’s tough,» said the doctor. «He’d ... Читать далее...
5. One day a man was walking in the woods when he got lostOne day a man was walking in the woods when he got lost. For two days he roamed around trying to find a way out. He had not eaten anything during this period and was famished. Over on a rock ledge he spotted a bald eagle, killed it, and started to eat it. Surprisingly a ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова deerDeer — олень Перевод слова A herd of deer — стадо оленей deer forest — олений заповедник deer breeding — оленеводство He shot at the Deer. Он выстрелил в оленя. A young Deer is a fawn. Детеныш оленя называется олененком. A female Deer is a doe. Самка оленя называется оленихой. Интересные факты Deer Hunter (Охотник ... Читать далее...
7. Значение идиомы head-hunting[head-hunting] {n.}, {slang}, {informal} 1. The custom of seekingout, decapitating, and preserving the heads of enemies as trophies. 2.A search for qualified individuals to fill certain positions. Thepresident sent a committee to the colleges and universities to do somehead-hunting; we hope he finds some young talent. 3. A systematicdestruction of opponents, especially in politics. Billings ... Читать далее...
8. Three guys go into a bar, one in a wheelchair, oneThree guys go into a bar, one in a wheelchair, one is blind and the other appears normal. A couple of minutes later, God walks in to get a beer. He sees the guys and decides to have compassion on them. He touches the blind guy on the forehead, and his sight is restored. He ... Читать далее...
9. One night, at the lodge of a hunting clubOne night, at the lodge of a hunting club, two new members were being introduced to other members and shown around. The man leading them around said, «See that old man asleep in the chair by the fire — place? He is our oldest member and can tell you some hunting stories you’ll never forget.» ... Читать далее...
10. Three guys enter a disabled swimming contestThree guys enter a disabled swimming contest. The first has no arms. The second no legs and the third has no body, just a head. They all line up, the whistle blows and «splash» they’re all in the pool. The guy with no arms takes the lead instantly but the guy with no legs is ... Читать далее...
11. Значение идиомы happy hunting ground[happy hunting ground] {n. phr.} 1. The place where, in AmericanIndian belief, a person goes after death; heaven. The Indiansbelieved that at death they went to the happy hunting ground. 2.{informal} A place or area where you can find a rich variety of whatyou want, and plenty of it. The forest is a happy hunting ... Читать далее...
12. Three guys are in a plane, lost in fogThree guys are in a plane, lost in fog, and they don’t know where they are. The first guy says «I’ll find out» and puts his arm out the plane, then brings it back in and says «We’re just over Paris» «How do you know» ask the others «Well I’ve just felt the top of ... Читать далее...
13. The ‘Good Will Hunting’ Script’s Hidden SecretPenned by a couple of then-relatively unknown writers and produced with a modest budget, Good Will Hunting proved to be a surprising success at the box office. It also garnered several Oscar nominations, with the late Robin Williams picking up the prize for Best Supporting Actor. Also taking home Oscar gold for the movie were ... Читать далее...
14. Three guys are discussing womenThree guys are discussing women. «I like to watch a woman’s tits best,» the first guy says. The second says «I like to look at a woman’s ass.» He asks the third guy «What about you?». «Me? I prefer to see the top of her head.»...
15. Trees recognize roe deer by salivaTrees are able to distinguish whether one of their buds or shoots has been randomly torn off or has been eaten by a roe deer. In the case of roe deer browsing, they activate corresponding defence mechanisms. This is the result of a new study by biologists from the Leipzig University and the German Centre ... Читать далее...
16. Bald-Face на английском языке писателя Jack LondonThe Klondike King paused meditatively, and the group on the hotel porch hitched their chairs up closer. «Talkin’ of bear,» he went on, «now up in the Northern Country there are various kinds. On the Little Pelly, for instance, they come down that thick in the summer to feed on the salmon that you can’t ... Читать далее...
17. Three guys were talking one morning about how drunk they wereThree guys were talking one morning about how drunk they were at this party they were at the night before. 1st guy: Man, I was so drunk that last night I got home and blew chunks. 2nd guy: Oh yeah? Well, I was so drunk that on the way home I was pulled over and ... Читать далее...
18. Catching the bearTwo men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran ... Читать далее...
19. Some men go on a hunting trip and separate into pairsSome men go on a hunting trip and separate into pairs. That evening one hunter, Sam, returned to camp alone toting a 12 point buck. «Where’s George?» one of the men asked, noticing that Sam had returned alone. «He’s about 6 miles back. He tripped and broke his ankle. I left him there ’cause I ... Читать далее...
20. Two guys are driving through Texas whenTwo guys are driving through Texas when they get pulled over by a state trooper. The trooper walks up, taps on the window with his nightstick, the driver rolls down the window, and the trooper smacks him in the head with the stick. The driver says, «Why’d you do that? The trooper says, «You’re in ... Читать далее...
21. A pastor in Maine skipped services one SundayA pastor in Maine skipped services one Sunday to go bear hunting. Along the trail he turned a corner and collided with a bear. the pastor stumbled, backwards, slipped off the trail, and began tumbling down the mountain, the bear in hot pursuit. Finally the pastor crashed into a bolder, breaking both his legs and ... Читать далее...
22. Two guys were discussing popular family trendsTwo guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and values. Stu said, «I didn’t sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?» Leroy replied, «I’m not sure, What was her maiden name?»...
23. A young Indian boy came back to the reservationA young Indian boy came back to the reservation for a family visit after his first year at college. When his dad asked him about his first year at school, he said: I’m having trouble with people making fun of me, especially my Indian name. How did you come to give your children such odd ... Читать далее...
24. Dating Nice Guys and Bad BoysJack: I’ve had it. I’m going to start Treating women like dirt. I’d get more dates. Alison: What brought this on? Jack: I Got dumped again by a woman who thinks I’m too nice – too nice! She says she wants to be with someone who’s more Assertive and Unpredictable. She didn’t say it In ... Читать далее...
25. Two Polish guys are discussing one’s upcoming weddingTwo Polish guys are discussing one’s upcoming wedding… «I’m not sure if my future bride is a virgin or not.» His buddy replies, «Oh, there’s an easy test for that. All you need is some red paint, some blue paint and a shovel. You paint one ball red and one ball blue. On your honeymoon, ... Читать далее...
26. You tell me!A game warden came upon a duck hunter who had bagged 3 ducks and decided to «enforce the laws pending.» He stopped the hunter, flashed his badge and said, «Looks like you’ve had a pretty good day. Mind if I inspect your kill?» The hunter shrugged and handed the ducks to the warden. The warden ... Читать далее...
27. There was three guys, one with a rubberThere was three guys, one with a rubber dick, one with a wooden dick, and one with a nine foot dick. The guy with the rubber dick couldn’t have sex because it wasn’t hard. The guy with the wooden dick couldn’t have sex because the other person would get splinters. Finally, the third guy with ... Читать далее...
28. Two men were walking through the woods whenTwo men were walking through the woods when a large bear walked out into the clearing no more than 50 feet in front of them. The first man dropped his backpack and dug out a pair of running shoes, then began to furiously attempt to lace them up as the bear slowly approached them. The ... Читать далее...
29. Значение идиомы eagle eye[eagle eye] {n.} Sharp vision like that of an eagle; the ability tonotice even the tiniest details. The new boss keeps an eagle eye onall aspects of our operation....
30. Four married guys go golfingFour married guys go golfing. During the 4th hole the following conversation took place: First Guy: «You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out golfing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend.» Second Guy: «That’s nothing, ... Читать далее...
31. So there were two guys on a roof, pounding nailsSo there were two guys on a roof, pounding nails. One guy pounded a nail in, then picked up another. He was holding the nail upside down. He unexpectedly threw the nail away. He picked up another nail, right side up this time, and pounded this in. He eventually threw so many upside down nails ... Читать далее...
32. These two guys had just gotten divorcesThese two guys had just gotten divorces and they swore they would never have anything to do with women again. They were best friends and they decided to move up to Alaska as far north as they could go and never look at a woman again. They got up there and went into a trader’s ... Читать далее...
33. A Jewish boy was walking with his girlfriendA Jewish boy was walking with his girlfriend on the grounds of his father’s house. His father was a successful doctor, and was carrying out a circumcision in the on-site surgery. As they were walking, they heard a scream and a foreskin flew out of the window and landed at the girl’s feet. «What’s this,» ... Читать далее...
34. These two guys are car pooling home from work one dayThese two guys are car pooling home from work one day. Traffic is barely crawling along and they are both a bit bored. So the driver is looking around and suddenly he points at two dogs having sex on someone’s front lawn. «Look», he shouts «What are the those dogs doing? are they fighting?» The ... Читать далее...
35. Three guys were sitting in a bar talkingThree guys were sitting in a bar talking. One was a Doctor, one was a Lawyer, and one was a Biker. After a sip of his martini, the doctor said; «You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I got my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedez. I figure that if she doesn’t like the ... Читать далее...
36. Six guys were playing poker when Smith losesSix guys were playing poker when Smith loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five complete their playing time standing up. Roberts looks around and asks, «Now, who is going to tell the wife?» They draw straws. Rippington, who ... Читать далее...
37. This black guy is walking along a beach whenThis black guy is walking along a beach when he looks down a sees an antique lamp. Thinking that he’ll get enough money for another vial of crack, he takes the bottle home and starts to clean it. He starts rubbing the lamp, when all of a sudden a Jewish genie appears, and being a ... Читать далее...
38. An Other oneThree old guys are out walking. First one says, ‘Windy, isn’t it?’ Second one says, ‘No, it’s Thursday!’ Third one says, ‘So am I. Let’s go get a beer.’ A man was telling his neighbor, ‘I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it’s state of the art. It’s ... Читать далее...
39. An Eagle is circling at about 5,000 ftAn Eagle is circling at about 5,000 ft. when he spies a field mouse down below him. He dives down and eats the mouse. After a little while the mouse works his way out the eagles butt. Proceeding to look around the mouse says: «Tail gunner to pilot…Tail gunner to pilot..» The eagle says «what ... Читать далее...
40. Sports-Related InjuriesGrace: What happened to you?! Paul: I had a little accident at the game today. Grace: Little accident?! You’re Limping and obviously in pain! Paul: I just Pulled a muscle in my back and Aggravated my Runner’s knee, that’s all. It’s nothing to worry about. Grace: And you’re still recovering from the Sprained ankle, Concussion, ... Читать далее...