The only true religion

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1. The Pope calls a meeting of all the cardinals The Pope calls a meeting of all the cardinals. When they have all assembled at the Vatican, he takes them into the meeting hall and states, “I have some really fantastic news and some very terrible news.” Of course, all the cardinals want to hear the good news first, so the Pope tells them, “Jesus […]...
2. Перевод слова religion Religion – религия, религиозное учение Перевод слова Buddhist religion – буддизм to enter into religion – постричься в монахи to abjure a religion – отрекаться от веры to practise a religion – исповедовать веру I am suspicious of any Religion. Я с недоверием отношусь ко всякой религии. He became thoughtful about Religion. Он стал серьезно […]...
3. A lawyer and the pope were both killed in an accident A lawyer and the pope were both killed in an accident. The two were in line to see St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter asked the lawyer his name and looked it up in his book. He then asked the Pope for his name, and looked it up in his book also. “Now, […]...
4. Ought to be hung When the airline Captain announced they were flying over Salt Lake City, Utah, a woman told the man sitting beside her, “I understand this is the home of the Mormon religion where husbands believe it’s OK to have more than one wife.” That’s true,” he replied, “as a matter of fact I happen to be […]...
5. Religion Religion is a system of thought, feeling, and action that is shared by a group and that gives the members an object of devotion; a code of behavior by which individuals may judge the personal and social consequences of their actions; and a frame of reference by which individuals may relate to their group and […]...
6. Religion in Great Britain Топик Религия в Великобритании рассказывает интересную историю становления англиканской церкви в Англии. Оказывается, Британия была и католической страной, но рассорившись с Папой, король Генрих VIII стал во главе англиканской церкви. Несколько раз религии менялись и в настоящее время, большинство англичан принадлежат к англиканской государственной церкви (одна из крупнейших ветвей протестантского христианства). Распространены также католическая и […]...
7. Перевод идиомы true to form / true to type, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: true to form / true to type Перевод: как всегда, как обычно, как ожидается; по образцу Пример: True to form, our teacher refused to accept our papers late. Как и ожидалось, наш учитель отказался принимать работы с опозданием....
8. One day a teacher was teaching religion One day a teacher was teaching religion, when she asked the class “What part of your body do you think goes up to heaven first?” Two children rose their hand. One was little Johnny. Hesitant to pick on him she chose little Mary. “I think your heart goes first because, that’s were your emotions of […]...
9. Перевод идиомы tried and true / tried-and-true, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: tried and true / tried-and-true Перевод: проверенный временем, испытанный временем Пример: I know a tried-and-true method to remove stains from a carpet. Я знаю проверенный временем метод удаления пятен с ковра....
10. The Pope took a philosophy professor The Pope took a philosophy professor (an atheist at that) out fishing on a large lake. As they drifted on the still lake, the philosopher accidentally dropped an oar and watched it float away. The pontiff stepped out of the boat, walked across the water to the oar, grabbed it and walked back to the […]...
11. Disagreeing about Religion Jim: You know that Religion is a Taboo subject, especially with Paul. Why were you Baiting him all through dinner? Tammy: I wasn’t baiting him. We have very different views on Spirituality and I wanted to discuss the subject with him. Jim: You were making Disparaging remarks about his Faith and some of the things […]...
12. 15,000 People In The Czech Republic Say Their Religion Is ‘Knights Of The Jedi’ The force is strong in the Czech Republic. In a recent census, more than 15,000 people in the Czech Republic listed their religion as “Knights of the Jedi,” the Hollywood Reporter reports. The Czech Republic’s total population is about 10 million, meaning that Jedis account for approximately.15% of the country. The “religion” takes its name […]...
13. Перевод слова wise Wise – мудрый, благоразумный, здравомыслящий Перевод слова Wise saying – мудрая пословица wise decision – мудрое решение it would not be wise to do it – было бы неблагоразумно делать это This differences a Wise man and a fool. В этом различие между умным и дураком. He was not very Wise. Он был не очень […]...
14. Значение идиомы come true [come true] {v.} To really happen; change from a dream or a plan into a fact. It took years of planning and saving, but their seagoing vacation came true at last. It was a dream come true when he met the President. His hope of living to 100 did not come true....
15. Religion in Great Britain – Религия в Великобритании British religion used to be closely connected with kings, queens and politics. England was a Roman Catholic country until 1534. In 1525 King Henry VIII decided to divorce his queen, Catherine of Aragon, because he fell in love with Anne Boleyn. But when Henry asked the Pope for permission to divorce Catherine, he refused. Henry […]...
16. Значение идиомы hold true [hold true] or [hold good] {v. phr.} To remain true. It hasalways held true that man cannot live without laws. Bob is a goodboy and that holds true of Jim....
17. Checking on the Status of an Application Leo: Here’s the mail. Denise: Did I get anything? Leo: No, sorry. Are you expecting something? Denise: Yeah, I’m waiting for a Decision letter about my Application to the McQ program. I should Hear any day now. Leo: Have you thought about calling and Checking on the status? Denise: I called last week and my […]...
18. A theological debate Several centuries ago, the Pope decreed that all the Jews had to convert or leave Italy. There was a huge outcry from the Jewish community, so the Pope offered a deal. He would have a religious debate with the leader of the Jewish community. If the Jews won, they could stay in Italy, if the […]...
19. Перевод слова true True – верно, правильный, правдивый, истина Перевод слова True story – правдивая история true friend – верный друг out of true – плохо установленный; неточный Can it be True? Неужели это правда? I affirm that it is True. Я подтверждаю, что это правда. “It will be difficult.”This is True.” – Это будет трудно. – Это […]...
20. When this guy heard that the Pope was coming to town When this guy heard that the Pope was coming to town, he went out and bought a tuxedo in the hope that the Pope might notice him on the parade route. When he went to the parade, there was this bum standing next to him, with old, dirty clothes on. The the guy’s amazement, when […]...
21. One Sunday, the pope REALLY wanted to play golf One Sunday, the pope REALLY wanted to play golf. But he couldn’t, since it was Sunday. But he figured, well, it’s ok if i just play a little bit. So he changed clothes and went out into the green. Up in heaven an angel saw him and reported it to Jesus. However, Jesus didn’t do […]...
22. Nature of Hell A thermodynamics professor had written a take home exam for his graduate students. It had one question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Support your answer with a proof.” Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when […]...
23. Значение идиомы ring true [ring true] {v. phr.} To have a tone of genuineness; soundconvincing. I believed his sob story about how he lost his fortune, because somehow it all rang true....
24. Значение идиомы run true to form [run true to form] {v. phr.} To follow a usual way; act asexpected; agree with how a person usually acts. The little boy’sactions ran true to form. He bothered his mother until she gave himhis way. Compare: PAR FOR THE COURSE....
25. Irish Religion Humor Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and says to the first man he meets, “Do you want to go to heaven?” The man said, “I do Father.” The priest said, “Then stand over there against the wall.” Then the priest asked the second man, “Do you want to got to heaven?” “Certainly, Father,” […]...
26. Перевод идиомы come true, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: come true Перевод: осуществиться, произойти на самом деле Пример: The young girl is working hard to make her dreams come true. Молодая девушка очень старается реализовать свои мечты....
27. A young man joined the Army and signed up with the paratroopers A young man joined the Army and signed up with the paratroopers. He went though the standard training, completed the practice jumps from higher and higher structures, and finally went to take his first jump from an airplane. The next day, he called home to his father to tell him the news. “So, did you […]...
28. Pope Dies Pope Dies The Pope dies and, naturally, goes to heaven. He’s met by the reception committee, and after a whirlwind tour is told that he can enjoy any of the myriad recreations available. He decides that he wants to read all of the ancient original text of the Holy Scriptures, and spends the next eon […]...
29. Перевод идиомы true to one’s word, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: true to one’s word Перевод: верный своему слову Пример: My friend was true to his word and was waiting for me exactly at the time that we had agreed upon. Мой друг сдержал свое слово, и ждал меня в точно назначенное время....
30. An artist asked the gallery owner An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time. “I have good news and bad news,” the owner replied. “The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told […]...
31. Miles Dobson was away from home on business Miles Dobson was away from home on business in another city. When he called home, his wife told him, “Miles, they had your name in the obits today.” “What! In the obituary column! That’s not only disgraceful but bad journalism. I’ll sue ’em.” “Tell me, Miles,” his wife asked tremulously, “wh…wh…where are you calling from?”...
32. Entering into Heaven A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, “Religion?” The man says, “Methodist.” St. Peter looks down his list, and says, “Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8.” Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. “Religion?” “Baptist.” “Go to room 18, but be very quiet […]...
33. One balmy evening in Rome the Pope decides to One balmy evening in Rome the Pope decides to take a walk. He slips out the rear door of the Vatican and is walking through the back alleys of Rome when he sees a ten-year-old boy smoking a cigarette. The Pope gently says to him, “Young man, you’re much too young to smoke!” The kid […]...
34. Перевод идиомы too good to be true, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: too good to be true Перевод: слишком хорошо, чтобы быть правдой Пример: The offer was too good to be true and I did not believe that it was possible. Предложение было слишком хорошим, чтобы быть правдой, и я не поверил, что такое возможно....
35. Too good to be true A man walked into a bar with his alligator and asked the bartender “Do you serve lawyers here?” “Sure do,” replied the bartender. “Good,” said the customer, “Give me a beer, and I’ll have a lawyer for my gator.”...
36. Days after Christmas The first day after Christmas My true love and I had a fight And so I chopped the pear tree down And burnt it, just for spite Then with a single cartridge I shot that blasted partridge My true love, my true love, my true love gave to me. The second day after Christmas I […]...
37. Перевод слова salt Salt – соль, солить, соленый Перевод слова Corn of salt – крупинка соли a dash of salt – щепотка соли low-salt diet – диета с употреблением минимального количества соли Pass the Salt, please. Передайте соль, пожалуйста. The food was pure Salt. Это была не пища, а сплошная соль. He gargled with Salt water. Он полоскал […]...
38. The Pope vs. the Queen The Pope and Queen Elizabeth were standing on a balcony beaming at thousands of people in the forecourt below. The Queen says to the Pope out of the corner of her mouth, “I bet you a tenner that I can make every English person in the crowd go wild with just a wave of my […]...
39. The definition of a phallic symbol This girl walks in to a doctors office and she asks “Whats a failic symbol? Doctor says “you’re kidding..” Girl says “no! I don’t know! Whats a failic symbol???” Doctor pulls his pants and underwear down and says “You see? This is a failic symbol!” Girl says “Oh! Its just like a penis, only smaller”...
40. True stupid stories 01 Really Stupid People Police in Wichita, Kansas, arrested a 22-year-old man at an airport hotel after he tried to pass two (counterfeit) $16 bills. A man in Johannesberg, South Africa, shot his 49-year-old friend in the face, seriously wounding him, while the two practiced shooting beer cans off each other’s head. A company trying to […]...