Главная ⇒ 📌Jokes ⇒ Organ

Organ

Q: Why are organists like a broken-winded cab horse?
A: They are always longing for another stop.

Q: Why are a organist’s fingers like lightning?
A: Because they rarely strike the same place twice.

Q: What do you get if you throw a piano down a mine shaft?
A: A flat miner.

Q: What do you get if you drop an organ on an army base?
A: A flat major.

Q: Why is an 11-foot concert grand better than a studio upright?
A: It makes a louder noise, when you drop it off a cliff.

Q: Why was the organ invented?
A: So the musician would have a place to put his beer.

Q: What does a German Hammond organist do in his life’s most tender moments?
A: He puts his Leslie on «slow».

The organ is the instrument of worship for in its sounding we sense the majesty of God and in its ending we know the Grace of God



Топик my favourite weather.
Тематический парк россии по английскому языку.

Related topics:

  1. Перевод слова organOrgan — орган, учреждение, часть тела Перевод слова Reproductive organs — органы размножения governmental organs — правительственные органы mouth organ — губная гармоника He just knew the bell of the church from the Organ. Он мог разве что отличить церковный колокол от органа. No one can play the Organ during service time without the consent ... Читать далее...
  2. Donating an OrganChristine: What is this Sticker on your Driver’s license? Saul: This sticker? It Indicates that I’ve signed up for the Organ donation program. If anything bad happens to me, I want my organs to go to Recipients who need them. Christine: You mean you want somebody else to have your Heart, Liver… Saul: …eyes, Kidneys, ... Читать далее...
  3. Значение идиомы drop by[drop by] or [stop by] {v.} 1. or [drop around] To make a short or unplanned visit; go on a call or errand; stop at someone’s home. Drop by any time you’re in town. My sister dropped around last night. Don’t forget to stop by at the gas station. Syn.: DROP IN. 2. or [drop ... Читать далее...
  4. Перевод слова lightningLightning — молния; скоростной, экстренный Перевод слова Lightning discharger — молниеотвод lightning flashes — молния сверкает stroke of lightning — удар молнии ball lightning — шаровая молния lightning express — сверхскорый поезд, экспресс Lightning flashed overhead. Молнии сверкали над головой. Lightning flashed and thunder pealed. Сверкнула молния, и прогремел гром. The Lightning shorted the TV. ... Читать далее...
  5. Значение идиомы drop out[drop out] {v.} To stop attending; quit; stop; leave. In the middle of the race, Joe got a blister on his foot and had to drop out. Teenagers who drop out of high school have trouble finding jobs....
  6. Значение идиомы wildcat strike[wildcat strike] {n.}, {informal} A strike not ordered by a laborunion; a strike spontaneously arranged by a group of workers. Thegarbage collectors have gone on a wildcat strike, but the union isgoing to stop it....
  7. Перевод слова rarelyRarely — редко, нечасто Перевод слова Rarely if ever — редко или никогда rarely magnificent — на редкость великолепный I see him very rarely — я очень редко его вижу He Rarely washes, and he smells Он редко моется, и от него дурно пахнет. She Rarely talks about her past. Она редко говорит о своем ... Читать далее...
  8. Scholarly discussionA stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the the stranger turned to the Little Johnny and said, «Let’s talk. I’ve heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.» Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said to ... Читать далее...
  9. Where are the fingers?Jon’s working at the lumberyard, pushing a tree through the buzz saw, and accidentally shears off all ten of his fingers. He goes to the emergency room. The doctor says, «Yuck! Well, give me the fingers, and I’ll see what I can do.» Jon says, «I haven’t got the fingers.» The doctor says, «What do ... Читать далее...
  10. PianoQ: What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft? A: A flat minor. Q: What do you get if you run over an army officer with a steam roller? A: A flat major. Q: What do you say to an army officer as you’re about to run him or her ... Читать далее...
  11. Значение идиомы horse[horse] See: BET ON THE WRONG HORSE, CART BEFORE THE HORSE, CHANGEHORSES IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREAM or CHANGE HORSES IN MIDSTREAM, EATLIKE A HORSE, HOLD ONE’S HORSES. IRON HORSE, LOCK THE BARN DOOR AFTERTHE HORSE IS STOLEN, LOOK A GIFT HORSE IN THE MOUTH, OFF ONE’S HIGHHORSE, ON ONE’S HIGH HORSE, PUT ONE’S ... Читать далее...
  12. Перевод идиомы high horse, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: high horse Перевод: высокомерное, надменное или презрительное отношение (часто используется в выражениях Get on your high horse и Get off your high horse) Пример: Get off your high horse and stop acting so mean. Перенстань быть таким высокомерным, и хватит так низко себя вести....
  13. Перевод слова fingersFingers — пальцы Перевод слова Dexterous fingers — ловкие пальцы to count on one’s fingers — считать на пальцах to snap one’s fingers — щелкать пальцами He snapped his Fingers. Он щелкнул пальцами. We ate with our Fingers. Мы ели руками. His Fingers turned to thumbs. Его пальцы одеревенели. Происхождение слова fingers Множественное число для ... Читать далее...
  14. Фразовый глагол drop off (1) — перевод и значение, пример использованияФразовый глагол: drop off (1) Перевод: довезти до, подбросить, доставить Пример: I’ll drop you off at the bus stop if you like. Если хочешь, я подброшу тебя до автобусной остановки....
  15. Значение идиомы cross one’s fingers[cross one’s fingers] {v. phr.} 1a. To cross two fingers of one hand for good luck. Mary crossed her fingers during the race so that Tom would win. 1b. or [keep one’s fingers crossed] {informal} To wish for good luck. Keep your fingers crossed while I take the test. 2. To cross two fingers of ... Читать далее...
  16. Значение идиомы drop dead[drop dead] {v.}, {slang} To go away or be quiet; stop bothering someone. — Usually used as a command. «Drop dead!» Bill told his little sister when she kept begging to help him build his model airplane. When Sally bumped into Kate’s desk and spilled ink for the fifth time, Kate told her to drop ... Читать далее...
  17. Значение идиомы finger[finger] See: BURN ONE’S FINGERS, CROSS ONE’S FINGERS or KEEP ONE’SFINGERS CROSSED, LAY A FINGER ON, LIFT A FINGER, PUT ONE’S FINGER ONalso LAY ONE’S FINGER ON, SLIP THROUGH ONE’S FINGERS, SNAP ONE’SFINGERS AT, STICKY FINGERS, TWIST AROUND ONE’S LITTLE FINGER, WORKONE’S FINGERS TO THE BONE....
  18. A talking horseA travelling salesman stopped alongside a field on a country road to rest a few minutes. The man had just closed his eyes when a horse came to the fence and began to boast about his past. «Yes sir, I’m a fine horse. I’ve run in 25 races and won over??5 million. I keep my ... Читать далее...
  19. A blonde decides to try horseback ridingA blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and then horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse’s mane, ... Читать далее...
  20. A college professor’s going to bed with his wifeA college professor’s going to bed with his wife. He’s not that tired, so he’s gonna stay awake and read while she goes to sleep. So he’s reading, and every once in a while he reaches over and tickles her on the fun spot… «Kitza kitza…» She says, «Will you stop that! Will you stop ... Читать далее...
  21. Перевод слова brokenBroken — разбитый, сломанный Перевод слова Broken leg — сломанная нога broken stone — щебень broken food — объедки, оставшиеся на столе Her spirit was Broken. Ее дух был сломлен. My Broken leg is mending. Моя сломанная нога идет на поправку. I become a Broken vessel. Я как разбитое корыто. Интересные факты «Сломленные» (Broken) — ... Читать далее...
  22. Перевод слова longLong — длинный, долгий, дальний; страстно желать Перевод слова Long-range bomber — бомбардировщик дальнего действия long borrowing — долгосрочные ссуды long breath — глубокий вдох long-distance bus — автобус дальнего следования we are longing to see you — мы очень хотим повидаться с вами How Long he is! Что он так долго?! I’m Longing for ... Читать далее...
  23. A bunch of Indians capture a cowboyA bunch of Indians capture a cowboy named «Clint», and bring him back to their camp to meet the chief. The chief says to Clint, «You going to die. But we sorry for you, so give you one wish a day for three days. On sundown of third day, you die. What is first wish?» ... Читать далее...
  24. Перевод слова horseHorse — лошадь, конь Перевод слова Horse breeding — разведение лошадей draught horse — упряжная лошадь heavy draught horse — тяжеловоз Caparison my Horse. Седлай моего коня! He jumped his Horse. Он заставил лошадь прыгнуть. The Horse is in form. Лошадь вполне подготовлена к бегам....
  25. A prostitute goes to the hospital to visit a colleagueA prostitute goes to the hospital to visit a colleague who is about to have a heart transplant. She’s worried about the friend so she asks the doctor: Girlfriend: I’m worried about my friend doc, what if her body rejects the organ? Doctor: Well she’s 36 years old and healthy. How long has she been ... Читать далее...
  26. Перевод слова flatFlat — плоский, ровный; плоскость; квартира Перевод слова Flat roof — плоская крыша cold-water flat — квартира без горячей воды the flat of the hand — ладонь A Flat stone was used as a table. Плоский камень использовался в качестве стола. The Flat was so cute. Квартира была так хороша. Work on a clean, Flat ... Читать далее...
  27. Значение идиомы at the drop of a hat[at the drop of a hat] {adv. phr.}, {informal} 1. Without waiting; immediately; promptly. If you need a babysitter quickly, call Mary, because she can come at the drop of a hat. Compare: ON THE SPUR OF THE MOMENT. 2. Whenever you have a chance; with very little cause or urging. At the drop of ... Читать далее...
  28. Перевод слова strikeStrike — ударять, ударять, бить Перевод слова Strike weapon — наступательное оружие to strike a blow — нанести удар to strike a mine — наскочить на мину He Struck me on the chin. Он ударил меня в подбородок. He Struck me by his knowledge. Он поразил меня своими знаниями. Strike the nail home. Забей гвоздь ... Читать далее...
  29. Значение идиомы sticky fingers[sticky fingers] {n. phr.}, {slang} 1. The habit of stealing thingsyou see and want. Don’t leave money in your locker; some of theboys have sticky fingers. Don’t leave that girl alone in the roomwith so many valuable objects around, because she has sticky fingers. 2. Ability to catch a ball, especially football forward passes. Jack ... Читать далее...
  30. Перевод слова dropDrop — капля, капать; бросать, ронять, падать Перевод слова Drop in the bucket — капля в море to drop the anchor — бросать якорь to drop one’s purse — обронить кошелек I didn’t spill a Drop. Я не пролил ни капли. The apple Dropped to the ground. Яблоко упало на землю. He Dropped his voice. ... Читать далее...
  31. A blonde bought two horses, and could never rememberA blonde bought two horses, and could never remember which was which. A neighbor suggested that she cut the tail of one horse and that worked great until the other horse got his tail caught in a bush. It tore just right and looked exactly like the other horse’s tail and our friend was stuck ... Читать далее...
  32. Значение идиомы put an end to[put an end to] or [put a stop to] {v. phr.} 1. To make end; stop; end. The farmer built an electric fence around his fieldto put an end to trespassing. The principal said that running inthe halls was dangerous, and told the teachers to put a stop to it. 2. To destroy or kill. ... Читать далее...
  33. The first time I went to a drug store to buy condomsThe first time I went to a drug store to buy condoms, I was waited on by a beautiful young woman. She asked what size I wanted and I said I wasn’t sure. So she asked now big I was and I said, «Compared to what?» She held up one finger and asked if I ... Читать далее...
  34. Значение идиомы slip through one’s fingers[slip through one’s fingers] {v. phr.} To escape without someone’sknowing how. Policemen surrounded the building, but the thiefmanaged to slip through their fingers. Mike earns a good wage, buthe doesn’t save a penny. Money just slips through his fingers....
  35. Be afraid if you annoy this husbandA man and woman where on their honeymoon after a long and very happy courtship. On their honeymoon, they decide to take their horses through the beautiful mountain passes of Europe. As the horses were crossing a small stream, the woman’s horse mis-steps and jostles the man’s wife. Once across the stream, the man dismounts, ... Читать далее...
  36. Значение идиомы flat-footed[flat-footed] {adj.}, {informal} 1. Straightforward; forthright;direct; outright. The governor issued a flat-footed denial of theaccusation. He came out flat-footed against the idea. 2. Notready; not prepared; — usually used with «catch». The teacher’squestion caught Tim flat-footed. Unexpected company at lunch timecaught Mrs. Green flat-footed....
  37. Значение идиомы pull up[pull up] {v.} 1. To check the forward motion of; halt; stop. Hepulled up his horse at the gate. 2. To tell to stop doingsomething; say is doing wrong and must stop; scold. Jimtalked rudely to Mother, and Father pulled him up. Ann said in herreport that America was discovered in 1634, and the teacher ... Читать далее...
  38. Three women, A brunette, a redhead, and a blondeThree women, A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde, all come home from work at the same time and get on the elevator. The brunette notices a blob on the elevator wall and says: » OOOOOhhh that looks like semen.» She reaches out and touches the blob with her fingers and says «It feels like ... Читать далее...
  39. Spelling checkerEye Halve a Spelling Chequer Eye halve a spelling chequer It came with my pea sea It plainly marques four my revue Miss steaks eye kin knot sea. Eye strike a key and type a word And weight four it two say Weather eye am wrong oar write It shows me strait a weigh. As ... Читать далее...
  40. Значение идиомы burn one’s fingers[burn one’s fingers] {v. phr.}, {informal} To get in trouble doing something and fear to do it again; learn caution through an unpleasant experience. He had burned his fingers in the stock market once, and didn’t want to try again. Some people can’t be told; they have to burn their fingers to learn....

Organ