On their honeymoon night

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1. A couple on their honeymoon woke up after their big nightA couple on their honeymoon woke up after their big night. The bride rolled over and said, «That was nice but tell me, what did my pussy look like before you rooted it?» The husband replied «Like a beautiful rose with drops of dew on it.» «That’s nice honey» she replied, «What did it look ... Читать далее...
2. Really torrid honeymoonAfter the third day of a really torrid honeymoon, the young couple finally emerged from their room and walked into the hotel restaurant. After they were seated, the waiter came over to get their orders. The new husband looked at his bride and said, «You know what I really feel like honey?» «Well sure,» she ... Читать далее...
3. A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversaryA man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, «When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?» The husband replied, «All I wanted to do ... Читать далее...
4. Перевод слова honeymoonHoneymoon — медовый месяц Перевод слова To be on honeymoon — проводить медовый месяц to go for a honeymoon — поехать в свадебное путешествие honeymoon couple — молодожены, совершающие свадебное путешествие The neoteric fashion of spending a Honeymoon on the railway. Новая мода проводить медовый месяц в путешествии по железной дороге. They plan to Honeymoon ... Читать далее...
5. On their wedding night the husband was so selfOn their wedding night the husband was so self — conscious about the smallness of his penis that before undressing, he snapped off the light. Once he was in bed, he unzipped his pants and handed his member to his bride. «That’s thoughtful, darling,» she cooed, «but we’ll need the light if you want to ... Читать далее...
6. Перевод слова brideBride — невеста Перевод слова To take a bride — выбрать невесту portionless bride — невеста без приданого yearling bride — год как замужем I give you the Bride and groom! Я предлагаю выпить за жениха и невесту! He and his Bride boarded the train. Он со своей невестой сел в поезд. The Bride and ... Читать далее...
7. Значение идиомы honeymoon is over[honeymoon is over] The first happy period of friendship andcooperation between two persons or groups is over. A few monthsafter a new President is elected, the honeymoon is over and Congressand the President begin to criticize each other. The honeymoon wassoon over for the new foreman and the men under him....
8. Honeymoon IIThe newlyweds had decided to take Amtrak’s «Car Train» to Florida, so they would have the mobility of being able to use their own vehicle on the honeymoon. They settled into one of the train’s upper berths together and cuddled. As the nite progressed, the new bride was heard to say quite excitedly a number ... Читать далее...
9. A middle aged man and woman fall in love, and decide to get marriedA middle aged man and woman fall in love, and decide to get married. On their wedding night they settle into the bridal suite and the bride says to her new groom, «Please be gentle… I am still a virgin.» The startled groom says «How can that be? You’ve been married twice…» The bride responds… ... Читать далее...
10. A young couple got married, and in their familyA young couple got married, and in their family, it was tradition that the best man dance with the bride for the first song. Well, this happened…but then they danced for the second song too. And the third. By the time the fourth song came on, the groom ran up and kicked the bride between ... Читать далее...
11. One night, at the lodge of a hunting clubOne night, at the lodge of a hunting club, two new members were being introduced to other members and shown around. The man leading them around said, «See that old man asleep in the chair by the fire — place? He is our oldest member and can tell you some hunting stories you’ll never forget.» ... Читать далее...
12. Значение идиомы pants[pants] See: ANTS IN ONE’S PANTS, CATCH ONE WITH ONE’S PANTS DOWN, FANCY PANTS, FLY BY THE SEAT OF ONE’S PANTS, GET THE LEAD OUT OF ONE’spanTS, KICK IN THE PANTS, WEAR THE TROUSERS or WEAR THE PANTS....
13. One day, a young cowboy and a cowgirl decidedOne day, a young cowboy and a cowgirl decided to get married. He was a man of the world and she was an innocent bride with no experience. On the first night of their honeymoon the couple washed up and started to get ready for bed. When they get into bed, they start exploring each ... Читать далее...
14. Wedding preparation guidelinesAnnouncement: It is the responsibility of the bride’s family to announce the wedding in the local newspaper. The announcement should include: A photograph of the bride (A high school yearbook picture is acceptable); Name of the groom, education completed by both bride and groom (do not include elementary school, unless that was the terminal degree.); ... Читать далее...
15. Going to a WeddingI got an Invitation in the mail last month that really surprised me. My friend Ulrich was getting married! We went to college together and he always said that he’d never get married. I guess he found his Dream girl in the end. The Church wedding was going to be at 3 p. m. and ... Читать далее...
16. On their first night to be togetherOn their first night to be together, the newly wed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom, all showered and wearing her beautiful robe. The proud husband says, «my dear, we are married now, you can open your robe.» The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished. ... Читать далее...
17. An old man and old woman got married and went on their honeymoonAn old man and old woman got married and went on their honeymoon. They were in bed getting ready to have sex for the first time and the old woman said I should tell you I have acute angina The old man says I hope so, you sure don’t have cute tits....
18. Sadie lost her husband almost four years ago and stillSadie lost her husband almost four years ago and still has not gotten out of her depression, mourning as if it were only yesterday. Her daughter constantly is calling her and urging her to get back into the world. Finally, Sadie says she’d go out, but didn’t know anyone. Her daughter immediately replies, «Mama! I ... Читать далее...
19. RepetitivenessAfter the lavish wedding reception, the newlyweds retired to their Honeymoon Suite. The groom turned down the lights and found some nice CDs to stack on the player. Then he excused himself and returned in pajamas and robe. He opened a bottle of champagne and poured them each a drink, unaware that his new bride ... Читать далее...
20. Could you please passThe nervous young bride became irritated by her husband’s lusty advances on their wedding night and reprimanded him severely. «I demand proper manners in bed,» she declared, «just as I do at the dinner table.» Amused by his wife’s formality, the groom smoothed his rumpled hair and climbed quietly between the sheets. «Is that better?» ... Читать далее...
21. A story with a moraleA man, called to testify at the IRS, asked his accountant for advice on what to wear. «Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper.» Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice. «Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie.» Confused, ... Читать далее...
22. Some horse-playThe newlywed couple were checking into the hotel. The new groom approached the desk clerk. He said he wanted the best for they were on their honeymoon. The clerk asked the man if he wanted the bridal. «No,» he said, «I don’t believe I’ll need it. I’ll just grab onto her ears and hold on ... Читать далее...
23. Some explainingThe newlyweds arrived at the front desk of the posh ocean-side resort in Hilton Head, South Carolina, looking all fresh, and eager to enjoy their two week vacation/honeymoon. The stunning blonde at the front desk smiled and said, «Well, hi Jimmy, how ya been lover? Long time no see.» A frosty silence prevailed until the ... Читать далее...
24. Jake is 85, and he gets married to a 16-year-oldJake is 85, and he gets married to a 16-year-old. He walks into the local bar when he gets back from his honeymoon, and all the guys want to hear about his wedding night. Jake says, «Well, when we got to the hotel, my youngest son carried me up the stairs, undressed me, and lifted ... Читать далее...
25. A guy out on the golf course takes a high speed ball rightA guy out on the golf course takes a high speed ball right in the crotch. Writhing in agony, he falls to the ground. He finally gets himself to the doctor. He says, «How bad is it doc? I’m going on my honeymoon next week and my fiance is still a virgin in every way.» ... Читать далее...
26. A Change Of VowsDuring the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer. «Look, I’ll give you $100 if you’ll change the wedding vows. When you get to me and the part where I’m to promise to ‘love, honor and obey’ and ‘forsaking all others, be faithful to her forever,’ I’d appreciate it if you’d ... Читать далее...
27. Brand newA guy out on the golf course takes a high speed ball right in the crotch. Writhing in agony, he falls to the ground. He finally gets himself to the doctor. He says, «How bad is it doc? I’m going on my honeymoon next week and my fiancee is still a virgin.» The doc said, ... Читать далее...
28. Перевод слова waistWaist — талия Перевод слова Waist measurements — объем талии a slender waist — тонкая талия waist belt — поясной ремень, портупея She wore a belt around her Waist. Она повязывала пояс вокруг талии. He put his arm around her Waist. Он обнял ее за талию. He has a narrow Waist and broad shoulders. У ... Читать далее...
29. AVOID SOCIAL BLUNDERS WITH THESE HELPFUL WEDDING HINTSAVOID SOCIAL BLUNDERS WITH THESE HELPFUL WEDDING HINTS: — Livestock usually is a poor choice for a wedding gift. — Is it okay to bring a date to a wedding? Not if you are the groom. — When dancing, never remove undergarments; no matter how hot it is. — Kissing the bride for more than ... Читать далее...
30. Перевод идиомы wear the pants, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: wear the pants Идиома: wear the pants Перевод: быть хозяином в доме, верховодить в семье Пример: The woman is very strong and is the one who wears the pants in her family Эта женщина очень сильная, и она верховодит в своей семье....
31. Перевод слова nightNight — ночь Перевод слова A blusterous windy night — штормовая ветреная ночь a clear night — ясная, звездная ночь the cope of night — покров ночи day and night — круглосуточно He’s on Night duty. Он на ночном дежурстве. It poured all Night. Ливень шел всю ночь. He yawned good Night. Он, зевая, произнес: ... Читать далее...
32. Перевод идиомы the small hours (of the night / morning) / the wee hours (of the night / morning), значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: the small hours (of the night / morning) / the wee hours (of the night / morning) Перевод: рассвет или время перед рассветом; часы после полуночи Пример: My father likes to read the newspaper in the small hours of the night. Моему отцу нравится читать газеты по ночам....
33. A young couple gets married, and the groomA young couple gets married, and the groom asks his bride if he can have a dresser drawer of his own that she will never open. The bride agrees. After 30 years of marriage, she notices that his drawer has been left ajar. She peeks in and sees 3 golf balls and $6,000. She confronts ... Читать далее...
34. Значение идиомы day and night[day and night] or [night and day] {adv.} 1. For days without stopping; continually. Syn.: AROUND THE CLOCK. Some filling stations on great highways are open day and night 365 days a year. The three men took turns driving the truck, and they drove night and day for three days. 2. Every day and every ... Читать далее...
35. Значение идиомы night owl[night owl] {n. phr.} One who sleeps during the day and stays up orworks during the night. Tom hardly ever sleeps at night; he prefersto work by lamp light and has become a regular night owl. Compare:GRAVEYARD SHIFT....
36. One night, an 87-year-old womanOne night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her husband in bed with another woman. Angry, she became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their apartment, killing him instantly. When brought before the court on charges of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say to ... Читать далее...
37. Значение идиомы wear the trousers[wear the trousers] or [wear the pants] {v. phr.}, {informal} Tohave a man’s authority; be the boss of a family or household. Mr. Wilson is henpecked by his wife; she wears the trousers in thatfamily. Mrs. Jones talks a lot but Mr. Jones wears the pants intheir house. Compare: RULE THE ROOST....
38. An ant and an elephant share a night of romanceAn ant and an elephant share a night of romance. Next morning the ant wakes up and the elephant is dead. «Damn», says the ant, «one night of passion and I spend the rest of my life digging a grave!»...
39. Childhood DiseasesChildhood Diseases Two newlyweds went on their honeymoon and were getting undressed together for the first time. He took off his shoes and socks and his toes were all twisted and discolored. «What happened to you feet?» his wife asked. «I had a childhood disease called tolio.» «Don’t you mean polio?» «No, tolio, it only ... Читать далее...
40. Little Gregory wakes up in the middle of the nightLittle Gregory wakes up in the middle of the night feeling alone and scared. He goes into his mother’s room for comfort and he sees his mom standing naked in front of the mirror. She is rubbing her chest and groaning, «I want a man, I want a man.» Shaking his head in bewilderment, Gregory ... Читать далее...