I was shopping at our local supermarket

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1. Remember a child A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally he went to the checkout line, but she got in front of him. “Pardon me,” she said, “I’m sorry if my […]...
2. The Supermarket Checkout I went to the supermarket to do my weekly shopping. The Cashiers at this market are usually pretty friendly, but this one must have been having a hard day. Cashier: Excuse me, sir, this Lane is for 15 items or less. It looks like you have more than that. Yong: No, actually I have exactly […]...
3. The Supermarket Checkout I went to the supermarket to do my weekly shopping. The Cashiers at this market are usually pretty friendly, but this one must have been having a hard day. Cashier: Excuse me, sir, this Lane is for 15 items or less. It looks like you have more than that. Yong: No, actually I have exactly […]...
4. Перевод слова supermarket Supermarket – супермаркет Перевод слова To shop at a supermarket – делать покупки в супермаркете cashier in a supermarket – кассир в супермаркете supermarket trolley – тележка в супермаркете He clerks in a Supermarket. Он работает продавцом в супермаркете. At lunchtime, I popped to the Supermarket to stock up on vital provisions. В обеденный перерыв […]...
5. A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep out the store.” “But I’m a college graduate.” the young man replied indignantly. “Oh, I’m sorry. I […]...
6. The local courtroom was packed as testimony began The local courtroom was packed as testimony began in the sentencing hearing of a woman convicted of murdering her husband of 20 years by poisoning his coffee. The defense attorney knew he had his work cut out for him trying to make his client appear more sympathetic to the Judge, especially since she had been […]...
7. Man walks into a supermarket and buys Man walks into a supermarket and buys : 1 bar of soap 1 toothbrush 1 tube toothpaste 1 loaf of bread 1 pint of milk 1 single serving cereal 1 single serving frozen dinner The girl at the checkout looks at him and says “Single are you?” The man replies very sarcastically “How did you […]...
8. An easy solution On a plane bound for New York the flight attendant approached a blonde sitting in the first class section and requested that she move to coach since she did not have a first class ticket. The blonde replied, “I’m blonde; I’m beautiful; I’m going to New York; and I’m not moving.” Not wanting to argue […]...
9. Using a Self-Checkout Machine Claudia: We’re done, right? Let’s get in this Cashier line. Raul: No need. This store has Self-checkout machines. Claudia: I don’t know. I think it would be easier going through a cashier line. Raul: Using the self-checkout will be much quicker. Let me show you. All you have to do is Scan the Barcodes on […]...
10. Using a Self-Checkout Machine Claudia: We’re done, right? Let’s get in this Cashier line. Raul: No need. This store has Self-checkout machines. Claudia: I don’t know. I think it would be easier going through a cashier line. Raul: Using the self-checkout will be much quicker. Let me show you. All you have to do is Scan the Barcodes on […]...
11. Shopping at the Supermarket Stocker: Can I help you find something? Meg: Yes, I’m looking for coffee. Stocker: That’s on Aisle 3. Let me show you where it is. Meg: Thanks. Hmm, I don’t see the Jitters Brand that I normally buy. Stocker: It looks like we’re Out of stock. We should get another Shipment next week. Meg: Okay, […]...
12. Shopping at the Supermarket Stocker: Can I help you find something? Meg: Yes, I’m looking for coffee. Stocker: That’s on Aisle 3. Let me show you where it is. Meg: Thanks. Hmm, I don’t see the Jitters Brand that I normally buy. Stocker: It looks like we’re Out of stock. We should get another Shipment next week. Meg: Okay, […]...
13. A small boy was lost at a large shopping mall A small boy was lost at a large shopping mall. He approached a uniformed policeman and said, “I’ve lost my dad!” The cop asked, “What’s he like?” The little boy replied, “Beer and women with big tits.”...
14. Judi was bored with driving her BMW Judi was bored with driving her BMW. It laced individuality and besides that, every other girl in the office had one. She fancied something a bit more individual, perhaps an MG convertible. That week she visited her local car dealer and spied a beautiful Jaguar XK140 convertible. It was wonderfully restored and she fell in […]...
15. The truth about reusable shopping bags Los Angeles is the latest American city to ban the use of single-use plastic grocery bags, but experts say their most common replacements-paper and reusable bags-come with environmental and financial costs of their own. Indeed, some reusable bags need to be used over 100 times before they’re better for the environment than single-use plastic bags. […]...
16. A psychology student at a local university A psychology student at a local university was sent on a field assignment to evaluate three patients in a local mental hospital. The first patient was locked in his room throwing tennis balls everywhere. The student asked why, and the patient answered “When I get out of here I going to ba a tennis pro.” […]...
17. A supermarket had a sale on boneless chicken breasts A supermarket had a sale on boneless chicken breasts, and a woman I know intended to stock up. At the store, however, she was disappointed to find only a few skimpy prepackaged portions of the poultry, so she complained to the butcher. “don’t worry, ya,” he said. “I’ll pack some more trays and have them […]...
18. Перевод слова local Local – местный, локальный Перевод слова Local bus – местный автобус local call – местный звонок local dialect – местный диалект local jurisdiction – местная юрисдикция, внутренняя юрисдикция We had dinner at a Local restaurant. Мы поужинали в местном ресторане. The shop sells Local crafts. Магазин торгует ремесленными изделиями местного производства. He writes for the […]...
19. This fellow comes to confession This fellow comes to confession. “Father, he said, forgive me for I have sinned.” The priest asked, “What did you do, my son?” “I lusted,” the fellow replied. “Tell me about it,” the priest said. The fellow then related his story. “Father, I am a deliveryman for UPS. Yesterday I was making a delivery in […]...
20. A Blonde A Blonde A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, “I’ve kidnapped you.” She then wrote a note saying, “I’ve kidnapped your kid. […]...
21. A policeman was patrolling near midnight A policeman was patrolling near midnight at a local parking spot overlooking a golf course. He drove by a car and saw a couple inside with the dome light on. Inside there was a young man in the driver’s seat reading a computer magazine and a young lady in the back seat calmly knitting. He […]...
22. Commiting suicide A blonde and a brunette are living together. The brunette came home from work one day and the blonde had a rope around her waist. The brunette asked why the rope was around her waist. The blonde said that she was trying to commit suicide. The brunette said, “You put it around your neck!” The […]...
23. Shopping for Produce On my way home from work, I stopped at the Supermarket. My doctor has been telling me to eat more Fresh fruits and vegetables, so I finally decided to follow her advice. I Resolved to eat better, so I could feel better. I Made a beeline for the Produce department. First, I looked at some […]...
24. Перевод слова shopping Shopping – покупка товаров, шопинг Перевод слова Shopping street – торговая улица to do one’s shopping – делать покупки she’s out shopping – она пошла по магазинам I am just raring to go Shopping. Мне просто не терпится отправиться в поход по магазинам. I need to go shopping this Afternoon. Днем мне нужно сходить за […]...
25. Shopping for Produce On my way home from work, I stopped at the Supermarket. My doctor has been telling me to eat more Fresh fruits and vegetables, so I finally decided to follow her advice. I Resolved to eat better, so I could feel better. I Made a beeline for the Produce department. First, I looked at some […]...
26. A blonde was plugging dollar after dollar into A blonde was plugging dollar after dollar into the coke machine at a large Vegas casino. She kept punching the buttons only to have happen what you’d expect. Cans of soda popped out, one after the other, and change too! After a while, she ran out of dollar bills so went and got more. Back […]...
27. Blonde on blonde A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde. The cop asked to see the blonde’s driver’s license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. “What does it look like?” she finally […]...
28. The man approached the very beautiful woman The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, “You know, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?” “Why?” “Because every time I talk to a a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.”...
29. A wife, arriving home from a shopping trip, was horrified to A wife, arriving home from a shopping trip, was horrified to find her husband in bed with a lovely young woman. Just as the wife was about to storm out of the house, her husband stopped her with these words: Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all came about. Driving along […]...
30. Pirate at the local bar discusses his past A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and talk turns to their adventures on the sea. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg-leg, a hook, and an eye patch. The seaman asks, “So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?” The pirate replies, “We were in a storm at sea, and […]...
31. Значение идиомы shopping center [shopping center] {n.} A place usually for neighborhood shopping, where there is a group of stores and shops inside of a large parkinglot. There is a bowling alley at the nearest shopping center. All the stores in our shopping center stay open until nine o’clock onFriday evenings....
32. Types of Shopping Areas Sarah: Come on! We only have two more hours before the stores close and I want to make it to the Outlet stores. Aidan: I thought that when you asked if I wanted to spend the day together, you meant we’d go somewhere for lunch, go to a movie, or just Hang out. Sarah: Isn’t […]...
33. Stupid people fearing WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER (actual AP headline) Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her inlaws, and while there, she went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries. Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with both hands behind […]...
34. Types of Shopping Areas Sarah: Come on! We only have two more hours before the stores close and I want to make it to the Outlet stores. Aidan: I thought that when you asked if I wanted to spend the day together, you meant we’d go somewhere for lunch, go to a movie, or just Hang out. Sarah: Isn’t […]...
35. The golf course A man playing on a new golf course got confused as to what hole he was on. He saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her and asked if she knew what hole he was playing. She replied, “I’m on the 7th hole, and you’re a hole behind me, so you […]...
36. A blonde came running home to her mother A blonde came running home to her mother, sobbing and hysterical. “What’s wrong?” her mum, (another blonde) asked. “My boyfriend’s just dropped me!” wailed the blonde. Her mother nodded wisely and started to tell her all about the birds and the bees. “No mum,” the blonde interrupted. “You don’t understand – I can fuck and […]...
37. The 75 year old man and his young, knockout wife The 75 year old man and his young, knockout wife were shopping in an upscale jewelry boutique when the man’s oldest friend bumped into him. Eyeing the curvaceous blonde bending over the counter to try on a necklace, the friend asked “How in the hell did YOU land a wife like that?” The old man […]...
38. A young blonde woman is distraught A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband […]...
39. A young woman stops into her local pharmacy to pick a supply A young woman stops into her local pharmacy to pick a supply of tampons for herself. She goes to the aisle where they are located and sees they are priced at five boxes for one dollar. Thinking this is a misprint; she finds a clerk and asks if this can possibly be the correct price. […]...
40. A young woman visited her doctor complaining of a bed wetting problem A young woman visited her doctor complaining of a bed wetting problem. The doctor asked her the usual questions and then asked her to go behind the screen and remove her clothes. She was a bit shocked but went ahead anyway. When she was undressed he asked her to stand on her hands in front […]...