Home ⇒ 📌Jokes ⇒ Fight against CO2

Fight against CO2

Isn’t it time we required universal Federal licensing for use of Alka Seltzer, Fizzies, and Pop Rocks? Background verification, two week cooling off period, fingerprinting, mandatory fizz locks. No gas release in excess of one liter. No automatic unloading – no motorized or wind-up Pez dispensors!

CO2 kills! Suffocation! GREENHOUSE EFFECT! Save our children!

Minorities are put at risk! I want a National War on CO2! We already know how Belgium was decimated by Coke-a-Cola. Can we afford to risk American lives so the small cliques of fantatics and zealots can exercise their bubbling pornographic appetites? How many children must die before we act!

Burning the flag releases CO2, Hitler’s crematoria released CO2, firebombing Dresden released CO2, nuking Hiroshima released CO2 – how much clearer must it be made?

And what

about NO2? SO2? ClO2? Are we about to discriminate on the basis of Period Table group number? Renumbering the groups ws not enough. Renumbering the groups will NEVER be enough! I say, “NEVER!” Every elemental group must realize its full electrochemical potential and oxidation state, and all its lesser oxidation states as well – with equal representation!

Today it is baking soda and vinegar. Tomorrow it will be sodium hydroxide and concentrated sulfuric acid. By the end of the week butyllithium/TMEDA will be poured into Magic Acid by the pound! By the ton! WHERE WILL IT STOP!

V

Exotherms, global warming, penguins sweated to death… all because some MONSTER wanted a little fizz. Isn’t that the way it always starts, with a “little” CO2 in a Bierstube in Munich? Computer models and their renormalized data are unequivocal: 44.0104!

Mommy, daddy, does your child breathe CO2?

Put an end to the CO2 nightmare before it’s too late!


1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (1 оценок, среднее: 5.00 из 5)

Related topics:

  1. Перевод слова acid Acid – кислота Перевод слова Acid looks – кислая мина acid green – ярко-зеленый lactic acid fermentation – молочнокислое брожение acid rain – кислотный дождь Acid attacks metals. Кислота разъедает металлы. I burned my skin with the Acid. Я обжегся кислотой. He juice of lemons yields citric Acid. Сок лимона содержит лимонную кислоту. Интересные факты […]...
  2. Thrown out of the lab Top Ten ways to get thrown out of chemistry lab 10. Pretend an electron got stuck in your ear, and insist on describing the sound to others. 9. Give a cup of liquid nitrogen to a classmate and ask, “Does this taste funny to you?” 8. Consistently write three atoms of potassium as “KKK.” 7. […]...
  3. Значение идиомы grace period [grace period] or [period of grace] {n.} The time or extra timeallowed in which to do something. Most insurance companies have agrace period of one month for payments. The teacher gave the classa week’s period of grace to finish workbooks....
  4. Перевод слова risk Risk – опасность, риск, рисковать Перевод слова That policy is now at risk – эта политика находится сейчас под угрозой commercial risk – коммерческий риск decision under risk – решение с учетом риска Why Risk your life? Зачем рисковать своей жизнью? It’s not worth the Risk. Это не стоит риска. Let’s minimize the Risk. Давайте […]...
  5. Day care workers charged with running toddler’Fight Club’ Two employees of a New Jersey day care center instigated “Fight Club”-style brawls between the toddlers and shared footage of the pint-sized pugilists on Snapchat, prosecutors said Tuesday. Erica Kenny, 22, and Chanese White, 28, were criminally charged for allegedly staging tussles between kids ages 4 to 6 at Lightbridge Academy, in Cranford. “Approximately a […]...
  6. Значение идиомы run a risk [run a risk] or [take a risk] {v. phr.} To be open to danger orloss; put yourself in danger; be unprotected. A baseball umpirewears a mask and chest protector so he won’t run the risk of being hitby the ball. Billy takes a risk of being hit by a car when he runsinto the street […]...
  7. Перевод идиомы at risk, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: at risk Перевод: в опасности, рисковать Пример: The children were at risk of getting sick when the disease spread in the school. Дети рисковали заболеть, когда болезнь распространилась по школе....
  8. Two groups of computer experts were set up in order to Two groups of computer experts were set up in order to find out whether computer is male or female: one group was male, and the other group was female. The group of women reported that computers should be refereed to as “HE” because: 1. In order to get their attention you have to turn them […]...
  9. The Causes of Heart Diseas Heart disease affects so many people that it has become a serious concern for medical science. The heart is a complex organ that is vulnerable to hereditary as well as environmental risks. Scientists identified a number of risk factors associated with heart disease. They grouped these risk factors into major and minor causes. Major causes […]...
  10. Перевод идиомы run a risk (of something) / run the risk (of something), значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: run a risk (of something) / run the risk (of something) Перевод: рисковать чем-либо Пример: You run a risk of going to jail if you drive after drinking. Ты рискуешь попасть в тюрьму, если будешь водить машину после того, как выпил....
  11. Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb and Don Juan were having a terrible fight Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb and Don Juan were having a terrible fight. “I am the most beautiful person in the world,” proclaimed Sleeping Beauty. “No, you’re not,” answered Don Juan and Tom Thumb. “I am the smallest person in the world,” shouted Tom Thumb. “No, you’re not,” said Sleeping Beauty and Don Juan. “I’ve had […]...
  12. Значение идиомы acid rock [acid rock] {n.}, {slang} A characteristic kind of rock in which loudness and beat predominate over melody; especially such music as influenced by drug experiences. John is a regular acid rock freak....
  13. Dealing with criminals A local policeman had just finished his shift one cold November evening and was at home with his wife. “You just won’t believe what happened this evening, in all my years on the force I’ve never seen anything like it.” “Oh yes dear, what happened?” “I came across two guys down by the canal, one […]...
  14. Значение идиомы acid head [acid head] {n.}, {slang} A regular user of LSD on whom the hallucinogenic drug has left a visible effect. The reason John acts so funny is that he is a regular acid head....
  15. Перевод идиомы acid test, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: acid test Перевод: испытание, тест, в котором ответы, заключения, не подвергаются сомнению Пример: The problem was an acid test of your faith in the new manager. Проблема заключалась в твоей полной вере в нового менеджера....
  16. Getting Over a Fight Alisa: Don’t be Mad. Sabir: I’m not mad. Alisa: Yes, you are. I’m sorry. I Admit it was my Fault. Will you stop Moping now? Sabir: I’m not moping. I’m giving you the Silent treatment. Alisa: I knew it! You’re still Peeved at me. What can I do To make it up to you? Sabir: […]...
  17. A Fight Ginger: I can’t believe it. You’re late again! Fred: I got Caught up at work. What are you so Worked up about? Ginger: I’ve Had it up to here with your Excuses. If you knew you were going to be late, why didn’t you call? We’ve Been over this a hundred times. Fred: There wasn’t […]...
  18. Значение идиомы fight off [fight off] {v. phr.} 1. To struggle against someone so as to freeoneself; push an attacker back. Suzy fought off her two attackersin Central Park with a couple of karate chops. 2. To strive toovercome something negative. After twelve hours at the computerterminal, Jane had to fight off her overwhelming desire to go tosleep....
  19. Picking a Fight I was sitting at my local bar waiting for my friends to arrive to watch the game. Two guys sitting a few seats away kept giving me strange looks, and one of them said, “What are you looking at?” I looked around to make sure that he was speaking to me, and before I could […]...
  20. Перевод слова period Period – период, срок Перевод слова Campaign period – срок проведения кампании a complete period of time – законченный промежуток времени convalescent period – период выздоровления The early formative Period of the Christian church. Ранний период формирования христианской церкви. Tolstoy often used Periods in his novels. Романы Толстого очень часто написаны длинными сложными предложениями. He […]...
  21. Перевод слова fight Fight – борьба, бой; драться Перевод слова Hand-to-hand fight – рукопашный бой free fight – всеобщая драка, свалка to fight like a lion – сражаться как лев She Fought her fear. Она боролась со своим страхом. He was still full of Fight. Он был все еще полон боевого задора. That cock won’t Fight. Этот номер […]...
  22. A Fist Fight Isabella: What are you doing?! Why are you trying to hit that guy? Tony: He Deserves it. He Insulted you. I’m going To knock his block off! Isabella: Stop it! Be Civilized. This isn’t some Free-for-all. You can’t Punch a guy just because he said something Offensive. Tony: Oh, yes I can. Let me at […]...
  23. Fun fun fun worry worry worry A teacher said to her little student Suzy, “Punctuate the following sentence: Fun fun fun worry worry worry.” Little Suzy thought for a moment and began her reply, “Let’s see. Fun period fun period fun no period worry worry worry!!!”...
  24. Перевод слова release Release – освобождать, отпускать; выпуск Перевод слова To release a brake – отпустить тормоза documentation release – выпуск документации to release a bird – выпустить птицу из клетки He was Released from his promise. Он был освобожден от своего обещания. She was Released from her job. Ее уволили с работы. I wish to be Released […]...
  25. College dining halls This reminds me of a similar stunt we used to enjoy at the dining hall in my undergrad days. The food service used opaque plastic salt and pepper shakers with pop-off tops that could be pried off with a knife blade if you were persistent enough. PREPARATION (in a restroom nearby): (1) Empty salt ( […]...
  26. A teacher was working with a group of underprivileged children A teacher was working with a group of underprivileged children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory exploration. With their eyes closed, they would feel objects from pumice stones to pine cones and smell aromatic herbs and exotic fruits. Then one day, the teacher brought in a great variety of lifesavers, more flavors than you […]...
  27. Значение идиомы pressure group [pressure group] {n. phr.} An organization whose goal it is tocreate changes by lobbying for the benefit of its own members. Certain unscrupulous pressure groups stop at nothing to achieve theirselfish aims....
  28. Sport it`s life Топик Спорт – это жизнь рассказывает, что занятия спортом необходимы и полезны для здоровья. Все люди это понимают, но одни, действительно, активно занимаются спортом, а другие – пассивно, т. е. предпочитают посидеть перед телевизором, обсуждая игру спортсменов. Sports play an important part in our life as our state of health depends on it. It’s popular […]...
  29. Перевод идиомы put up a fight / put up a struggle, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: put up a fight / put up a struggle Перевод: сильно стараться, бороться Пример: We put up a good fight but we were unable to win the game. Мы сильно постарались, но не смогли победить в игре....
  30. Перевод идиомы fight against time, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: fight against time Перевод: спешить побыстрее сделать что-либо; стараться сделать что-либо быстро Пример: The rescue party was fighting against time to save the men who were trapped in the coal mine. Спасательная команда очень спешила, чтобы успеть спасти людей, которые оказались в ловушке в угольной шахте....
  31. Перевод идиомы fight tooth and nail, значение выражения и пример использования Идиома: fight tooth and nail Перевод: бороться всеми средствами; сражаться не на жизнь, а на смерть; сражаться до последнего Пример: Canadian women fought tooth and nail for the right to vote. Канадские женщины сражались до последнего за право голосовать....
  32. Значение идиомы honeymoon is over [honeymoon is over] The first happy period of friendship andcooperation between two persons or groups is over. A few monthsafter a new President is elected, the honeymoon is over and Congressand the President begin to criticize each other. The honeymoon wassoon over for the new foreman and the men under him....
  33. Значение идиомы calculated risk [calculated risk] {n.} An action that may fail but is judged more likely to succeed. The sending of troops to the rebellious island was a calculated risk....
  34. Venus Топик Планета Венера подробно расскажет об этом удивительном объекте Солнечной Системы, второй планете от Солнца. Вы узнаете об удивительных отличительных особенностях этой планеты, а кроме всего прочего, Венера – самая яркая планета, после Солнца и Луны. The second planet from the sun bakes under twice as much solar radiation as Earth and reaches temperatures of […]...
  35. Перевод слова group Group – группа, группировать Перевод слова A group of people – группа людей study group – учебная группа bronze group – скульптурная группа в бронзе Different flowers can be Grouped together to make a colourful display. Различные цветы могут быть собраны вместе, чтобы придать красочный вид. Spectators Grouped in twos. Зрители встали парами. The Group […]...
  36. Перевод слова week Week – неделя Перевод слова The best part of the week – большая часть недели current week – текущая неделя first day (of the week) – воскресенье I arrived a Week ago. Я приехал неделю назад. She is paid by the Week. Ей платят каждую неделю. She got a perm last Week. Она сделала химическую […]...
  37. Значение идиомы weed out [weed out] {v.} 1. To remove what is unwanted, harmful, or not goodenough from. Mother weeded out the library because there were toomany books. Many colleges and universities weed out their freshmanclasses to make room for better students. 2. To take from a collection or group; remove for the purpose ofimproving a collection or group; […]...
  38. The Problem of Smoking Топик Проблема курения рассказывает о такой вредной привычке, как курение. Курение подрывает здоровье курящих мужчин, женщин и подростков. Кроме этого, жертвами пассивного курения становятся окружающие, некурящие люди. В нашей стране проводится активная антитабачная компания: запрещена продажа табачных изделий несовершеннолетним, курение запрещено в дальних и пригородных поездах, самолетах, на морских судах, в театрах, клубах и т. […]...
  39. Mental Disorders Dr. Miao: At Berthiaume College, we take Mental health issues very seriously. That’s why we have so many mental health services on campus. Dean: Such as? Dr. Miao: Well, for example, there is a meeting tonight of our Support group for Anorexics and Bulimics. Tomorrow night, I’ll be speaking to a group of students about […]...
  40. Magician and Parrot Magician and Parrot A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. The audience would be different each week, so the magician allowed himself to do the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: The captain’s parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician […]...
Fight against CO2
«
»