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Are computers males or females? TOP 5 REASONS WHY COMPUTERS MUST BE MALE

Are computers males or females? You decide. TOP 5 REASONS WHY COMPUTERS MUST BE MALE: 5. They’re heavily dependent on external tools and equipment. 4. They periodically cut you off right when you think you’ve established a network connection. 3. They’ll usually do what you ask them to do, but they won’t do more than they have to and they won’t think of it on their own. 2. They’re typically obsolete within five years and need to be traded in for a new model. Some users, however, feel they’ve already invested so much in the damn machine that they’re compelled to remain with an under powered system. 1. They get hot when you turn them on, and that’s the only time you have their attention. FIVE REASONS COMPUTERS MUST BE FEMALE: 5. No one but their creator understands their logic. 4. Even the smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference. 3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else. 2. The message, «Bad command or filename,» is about as informative as «If you don’t know why I’m mad at you, then I’m certainly not going to tell you.» 1. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.\



Environmental protection is an easy problem.
Найти русский аналог идиомы the grass is always.

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  1. Three college roommates — two females and a maleThree college roommates — two females and a male — began to argue after dinner about whose turn it was to do the dishes. «All right,» one of the girls said, «the first one to speak has to do them.» The trio retired to the living room to watch TV. When their neighbor, a school ... Читать далее...
  2. Two male flies are buzzing aroundTwo male flies are buzzing around, cruising for good looking females. One spots a real cutie sitting on a pile of cow shit and dives down toward her. «Pardon me» he asks, turning on his best charm, «…but is this stool taken?»...
  3. Перевод слова maleMale — мужчина, мужской, мужского пола Перевод слова Male voice choir — мужской хор male fern — мужской папоротник male midwife — акушер male pigeon — голубь-самец A Male duck is a drake. Самец утки — это селезень. The Male has a white breast. У самцов грудка белая. Does Christianity promote Male domination over women? ... Читать далее...
  4. Computers are femaleThe top six reasons computers must be female: 6. As soon as you have one, a better one is just around the corner. 5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic. 4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference. 3. The native language used to communicate with other ... Читать далее...
  5. What are the five reasons for not wanting to be an egg?What are the five reasons for not wanting to be an egg? 1) You only get laid once. 2) You only get eaten once. 3) It takes you seven min. to get hard in boiling water. 4) You have to come in a box with 11 other guys. 5) The only one that ever sits ... Читать далее...
  6. Перевод слова externalExternal — внешний, наружний Перевод слова External action — внешнее воздействие external force — внешняя сила external considerations — сторонние соображения External doors should be of robust construction. Наружные двери должны быть прочной конструкции. Drivers, security guards and cleaners were outsourced from External agencies. Водители, охранники и уборщики были наняты на стороне — в соответствующих ... Читать далее...
  7. The medical student was asked four reasonsThe medical student was asked four reasons why mother’s milk was better for babies than cow’s milk. This is the answer he submitted: 1. It’s fresher. 2. It’s cleaner. 3. The cats can’t get to it. 4. It’s easier to take on a picnic. He also added: «It comes in such cute containers.»...
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  9. Computers in Our Life — Компьютеры в нашей жизни (2)Computer addicts are the minority of computer users but there is no doubt that more and more young people are computer literate. Computer studies is a subject in many schools and many young people have personal computers. About one in three hundred computer owners spend almost all their time using computers. Ninety six per cent ... Читать далее...
  10. University courses for men and womenWhatsamatta University’s Seminars For Men Fall Catalogue Once again, the female staff at Whatsamatta University will be offering courses for men of all marital status in an attempt to help males and females understand each other better. Attendance in at least 10 of the following is required. 1. Combatting Stupidity 2. You Too Can Do ... Читать далее...
  11. ComputersТопик Компьютеры рассказывает историю компьютеров – потомков простого арифмометра, изобретенного профессором Чарльзом Бэббиджем в 1812 году. В наше время компьютеры используются повсеместно: индивидуальными пользователями, учеными, врачами-практиками, для обучения школьников основам информатики и вычислительной техники. Каждый выпускник школы должен уметь пользоваться компьютером, это важно для дальнейшей успешной карьеры. Если современный компьютер работает быстрее и точнее, чем ... Читать далее...
  12. Перевод слова dependentDependent — зависимый, подчиненный, подвластный Перевод слова Dependent on the weather — зависящий от погоды it is dependent upon personal taste — это дело вкуса dependent country — зависимая страна He is Dependent on his parents for support. Он материально зависим от родителей. All things in nature are Dependent on one another. Все в природе ... Читать далее...
  13. Computers in my life — Компьютеры в моей жизниComputer addicts are the minority of computer users but there is no doubt that more and more young people are computer literate. Computer studies is a subject in many schools and many young people have personal computers. About one in three hundred computer owners spend almost all their time using computers. Ninety six per cent ... Читать далее...
  14. Two groups of computer experts were set up in order toTwo groups of computer experts were set up in order to find out whether computer is male or female: one group was male, and the other group was female. The group of women reported that computers should be refereed to as «HE» because: 1. In order to get their attention you have to turn them ... Читать далее...
  15. FliesA woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. «What are you doing?» She asked. «Hunting Flies» He responded. «Oh. Killing any?» She asked. «Yep, 3 males, 2 Females,» he replied. Intrigued, she asked. «How can you tell?» He responded, «3 were on a beer can, 2 were ... Читать далее...
  16. Reasons to allow drinking at workThe below are valid reasons as to why drinking should be allowed at work. If you use them wisely, you may even be able to convince your boss into allowing alcohol. 1. It’s an incentive to show up. 2. It reduces stress. 3. It leads to more honest communications. 4. It reduces complaints about low ... Читать далее...
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  18. Перевод слова heavilyHeavily — тяжело, интенсивно, сильно Перевод слова Heavily loaded car — тяжело нагруженная машина to fall heavily — тяжело рухнуть to take the news heavily — тяжело переживать известие heavily wooded — густо поросший лесом Breakfast passed very Heavily. Завтрак прошел очень уныло. His feet became Heavily dusted. Ноги его покрылись толстым слоем пыли. I ... Читать далее...
  19. Differences in Male and Female FriendshipsLauren: Did you see what Stephanie was wearing? She looked like a wet dog! Quentin: Why do women do that? Lauren: Do what? Quentin: Why do women Put other women down? Is it to make themselves feel Superior? Lauren: It was only a joke. I Didn’t mean anything by it. Quentin: Do you really think ... Читать далее...
  20. За и против компьютеров/ Computers: For And AgainstНа английском языке Перевод на русский язык Why We Go To School За и против компьютеров Computers now are an essential part of our life. I can’t imagine my life without a computer. There so many advantages of using a computer. First of all they make our lives easier. Computers help us at school, university, ... Читать далее...
  21. Компьютеры в нашей жизни/ Computers In Our LifeНа английском языке Перевод на русский язык Computers In Our Life Компьютеры в нашей жизни Our life would be boring without computers. It’s hard to believe that one device can provide people with entertainment, news, education, music. With the appearance of computer many things have lost their importance. People don’t watch TV anymore, don’t go ... Читать далее...
  22. Computers in Our Life — Компьютеры в нашей жизниOur life would be boring without computers. It’s hard to believe that one device can provide people with entertainment, news, education, music. With the appearance of computer many things have lost their importance. People don’t watch TV anymore, don’t go to the cinema very often. They don’t listen to the radio, CD — or MP3-player. ... Читать далее...
  23. A little turtle begins to climb a tree slowlyA little turtle begins to climb a tree slowly. After long hours of effort, he reaches the top, jumps into the air waving his front legs, until reaches heavily into the ground with a hard knock over his shell. After recovering his consciousness, he starts to climb the tree again, jumps again, and knocks the ... Читать далее...
  24. Значение идиомы toy with an[toy with an] or [the idea] {v. phr.} To consider an idea or anoffer periodically without coming to a decision. He was toying withthe idea of accepting the company’s offer of the vice presidency inTokyo, but he was unable to decide....
  25. Перевод слова equipmentEquipment — оборудование, снаряжение Перевод слова To work bugs out of equipment — отлаживать оборудование snow cleaning equipment — снегоуборочное оборудование crash equipment — аварийно-спасательное оборудование The photographer came early to set up his Equipment. Фотограф пришел пораньше, чтобы установить свое оборудование. He has trucked all his Equipment. Он привез на грузовике все свое оборудование. ... Читать далее...
  26. Guinea pig to become father to 400 after breaking into female enclosureRandy escaped his male only enclosure at Hatton Adventure World in Warwick and broke into the female-only area. Staff at Hatton Country World in Warwickshire couldn’t understand why they suddenly had 100 pregnant guinea pigs on their hands — until they released one of the male rodents had managed to escape his enclosure and infiltrate ... Читать далее...
  27. Диалог на английском языке с переводом «Компьютеры (Computers)»По-английски Перевод на русский Rita: Vlad, can you help me? Рита: Влад, ты бы мог мне помочь? Vlad: Yes, sure. What’s the matter, Rita? Влад: Да, конечно. Что случилось, Рита? Rita: I’m having trouble while trying to create a new document on this computer. Рита: У меня проблема при создании нового документа на этом компьютере. ... Читать далее...
  28. Reasons for the Mir AccidentAfter intensive investigation on both the Soviet and US parts, spokespersons from both space agencies have determined the cause for the accident which has placed the station and its resident personnel in jeopardy. In terse statements at a recent press conference, Soviet and US space agency spokespersons said Thursday We have concluded joint investigations concerning ... Читать далее...
  29. Pecuniary reasonsA few moments after the daughter announced her engagement, her Father asked, «Does this fellow have any money?» The daughter shook her head sadly. «Oh Daddy! You men are all alike.» sighing deeply, she replied, «That’s exactly what he asked me about you.»...
  30. Buying Tools at a Hardware StoreChuck: Just remember that we have a lot to accomplish today, so let’s just get what we need and go, okay? Ayaka: Sure, we just need a few tools for our DIY project. The Power tools are over there. Chuck: Whoa, we’re not getting power tools. We just need a few simple Hand tools: a ... Читать далее...
  31. Buying Tools at a Hardware StoreChuck: Just remember that we have a lot to accomplish today, so let’s just get what we need and go, okay? Ayaka: Sure, we just need a few tools for our DIY project. The Power tools are over there. Chuck: Whoa, we’re not getting power tools. We just need a few simple Hand tools: a ... Читать далее...
  32. 10 Quacking Facts About Ducks«From troubles of the world I turn to ducks, Beautiful comical things» — Ducks by Frank W. Harvey From Jemima to Donald, ducks have permeated popular culture due to their friendly and entertaining nature. But far from just being waddling bundles of feathers, ducks are actually very complex creatures… 1. THEY FOLLOW THE FIRST ANIMAL ... Читать далее...
  33. Reasons to stay at work all night1. Act out your version of a company takeover. 2. Find a way to change everyone’s password to «chrysanthemum». 3. Around 3:20am, play connect-the-dots with lights still on in other office buildings. Keep going until you see a small woodland creature. 4. Sneaking in the boss’s desk could land you an unexpected promotion. 5. Draw ... Читать далее...
  34. Five Reasons Why You Should Probably Stop Using Antibacterial SoapAs the FDA recently noted, antibacterial products are no more effective than soap and water, and could be dangerous The FDA announced a bold new position on antibacterial soap: Manufacturers have to show that it’s both safe and more effective than simply washing with conventional soap and water, or they have to take it off ... Читать далее...
  35. Перевод слова decideDecide — принимать решение, решать Перевод слова To decide a point — решить вопрос to decide a battle — решить исход битвы that decides me! — решено! It’s up to you to Decide. Решай сам. This is for you to Decide. Это вам решать. She Decided on the green hat. Она выбрала зеленую шляпу....
  36. College DormOn the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules: «The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time.» He continued, «Anybody caught breaking this rule the ... Читать далее...
  37. A new taxDepartment of the Treasury Internal Revenue Service Washington, D. C. To: All Male Taxpayers RE: Notice of increase of tax payment Form 1040 — P The only thing that the IRS has not taxed yet is your penis. This is due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 30% ... Читать далее...
  38. Leasing Business EquipmentOlena: We need To keep pace with changing technology, but how are we going To raise capital to upgrade our Equipment? Joel: I’m not sure. Maybe we can find a Supplier who will Extend credit to us. We can pay in Installments. Olena: That’ll be hard to do. No one wants to extend credit these ... Читать далее...
  39. Pray hardA lady goes to her parish priest one day and tells him, «Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots but they only know how to say one thing.» «What do they say?» the priest inquired. «They say, ‘Hi, we’re prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?» «That’s obscene!» the priest exclaimed, ... Читать далее...
  40. Пословица / поговорка a bad workman blames his tools / a bad workman finds fault with his tools — перевод и значение, пример использованияПословица / поговорка: a bad workman blames his tools / a bad workman finds fault with his tools Перевод: у плохого мастера всегда инструмент виноват Эквивалент в русском языке: мастер глуп — нож туп Пример: The carpenter was angry that his saw did not cut well. As often happens, a bad workman blames his tools. ... Читать далее...

Are computers males or females? TOP 5 REASONS WHY COMPUTERS MUST BE MALE