A man lay sprawled across three entire seats

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1. Where are you fromThe cowboy lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh Amarillo theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this he whispered to the cowboy, «Sorry, sir, but you’re only allowed one seat.» The cowboy groaned but didn’t budge. The usher became more impatient. «Sir, if you don’t get up from there, I’m going ... Читать далее...
2. Перевод слова entireEntire — полный, целый Перевод слова The entire country — вся страна the entire world — целый мир, весь свет entire contract — неделимый договор Have you drunk the Entire bottle? Вы выпили всю бутылку? He willed his Entire estate to her. Он завещал ей все свое состояние. The war affected an Entire generation of ... Читать далее...
3. Charlie Sheen Once Bought 2,600+ Outfield Seats At An Angels’ Game Because He Wanted To Catch A Home Run BallCharlie Sheen has been making a bit of news this week with outlandish comments on TV and radio appearances, but his bizarre behavior is nothing new. In 1996, Sports Illustrated included a blurb in its «Scorecard» section that described Sheen’s trip to a California Angels game. Apparently, Sheen was determined to catch a home run ... Читать далее...
4. A youngster devoted an entire rainy indoors afternoon to aA youngster devoted an entire rainy indoors afternoon to a drawing he was doing with varicolored crayons. His mother finally looked over his shoulder, and, puzzled, asked «Who’s that you’re drawing, son?» The son answered, «God.» «Don’t be silly,» reproved the mother. «Nobody knows what God looks like.» Not even pausing in his task, the ... Читать далее...
5. Seeing a PlayI Ran into my neighbor, Dennis, yesterday afternoon. He asked if I wanted two tickets to the theater. He had Season tickets but couldn’t go to this performance. It was Opening night of Shakespeare’s The Tempest. I jumped at his offer and invited Lucy to come along. We arrived at the theater a half an ... Читать далее...
6. Buying Theater TicketsSusie: I can’t believe I’m going to get to see my favorite actor in a Play. I want Front row seats! David: I’m looking at the Venue’s seating plan right now and all front row seats are Taken for the entire Run. I’m guessing that Season ticket holders got those. Susie: Damn! All right. Let’s ... Читать далее...
7. Storing Luggage on an AirplaneYoshi: Can you hold my jacket while I try to get my Roller bag down the Aisle? Tatiana: All right, but I have to roll my own bag down the aisle, you know. Yoshi: Fine, give it back to me. All of these Overhead bins are full. Where are we supposed To store them? Tatiana: ... Читать далее...
8. A customer sent an order to a distributorA customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount of goods totaling a great deal of money. The distributor noticed that the previous bill hadn’t been paid. The collections manager left a voice-mail for them saying, «We can’t ship your new order until you pay for the last one.» The next day ... Читать далее...
9. Dumb intercourse«Information. Can I help you?» «I’d like the number of the Theater Guild, please.» «One moment, please.» Pause. «I’m sorry sir, I have no listing for a Theodore Guild.» «No, no. It isn’t a person. It’s an organization. It’s Theater Guild.» «I told you, sir. I have no listing for a Theodore Guild.» «Not *Theodore*! ... Читать далее...
10. Перевод идиомы lower one’s voice, значение выражения и пример использованияИдиома: lower one’s voice Перевод: говорить потише, негромко Пример: The usher in the movie theater asked me to lower my voice. Билетер в театре попросил меня говорить потише....
11. The bank manager was in the final stages of hiringThe bank manager was in the final stages of hiring a cashierand was down to two final applicants — one of which would get the job. The first one interviewed was from a small college in upstate New York. A nice young man, but a bit timid. Then he called for the second man, «Jim ... Читать далее...
12. Значение идиомы little theater[little theater] {n.} A theater, usually with nonprofessionalactors and actresses, which presents plays more for personal pleasureand practice than for profit. Little theater groups are active inall parts of the United States. Many famous actors began in littletheaters....
13. Taking the final examTwo college basketball players were taking an important final exam. If they failed, they would be on academic probation and not allowed to play in the big game the following week. The exam was fill-in-the-blank. The last question read, «Old MacDonald had a ________.» Bubba was stumped. He had no idea what to answer. But ... Читать далее...
14. Перевод слова managerManager — управляющий, руководитель, менеджер Перевод слова Manager of distribution — менеджер отдела сбыта branch manager — заведующий отделением, заведующий филиалом campaign manager — руководитель избирательной кампании He was appointed Manager. Его назначили управляющим. He will make a good Manager. Он станет хорошим управляющим. I demand to see the Manager. Я хочу видеть менеджера. Происхождение ... Читать далее...
15. Beware of dog!Upon entering the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying DANGER! BEWARE OF DOG! posted on the glass door. Inside he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor beside the cash register. He asked the store manager, «Is THAT the dog folks are supposed to beware of?» «Yep, that’s him,» ... Читать далее...
16. Cowboy Joe was telling his fellow cowboys back on the ranchCowboy Joe was telling his fellow cowboys back on the ranch about his first visit to a big-city church. «When I got there, they had me park my old truck in the corral,» Joe began. «You mean the parking lot,» interrupted Charlie, a more worldly fellow. «I walked up the trail to the door,» Joe ... Читать далее...
17. NoticeTo make things easier for all of us, please notice this Important Notice About Notices. You may have noticed the increased number of notices for you to notice. We notice that some of our notices have been noticed. On the other hand, some of our notices have not been noticed. This is very noticeable. It ... Читать далее...
18. Anybody Home?A boss of a big company needed to call one of his employees about an urgent problem with one of the main computers. He dialed the employee’s home phone number and was greeted with a child’s whispered, «Hello?» Feeling put out at the inconvenience of having to talk to the youngster, the boss asked, «Is ... Читать далее...
19. At a U. N. meeting the American ambassadorAt a U. N. meeting the American ambassador turned to the Japanese ambassador and whispered, «When was your last election?» The Japanese ambassador turned bright red and whispered back, «before bleakfast.»...
20. A Good Review of a PlayI invited Bruce to a play at the Mark Taper Forum and we Got there a little early. We Handed our tickets to the woman at the door and Found our seats. Megan: I’m glad we got here early to find our seats. I know that this is a Sold out Performance. Bruce: The Cast ... Читать далее...
21. When this guy heard that the Pope was coming to townWhen this guy heard that the Pope was coming to town, he went out and bought a tuxedo in the hope that the Pope might notice him on the parade route. When he went to the parade, there was this bum standing next to him, with old, dirty clothes on. The the guy’s amazement, when ... Читать далее...
22. The work qualification testMurphy applied for an engineering position at an Irish firm based in Dublin. An American applied for the same job and both applicants having the same qualifications were asked to take a test by the Department manager. Upon completion of the test both men only missed one of the questions. The manager went to Murphy ... Читать далее...
23. Next time you think your hotel bill is too high you might want to consider thisHusband and wife are traveling by car from Key West to Boston After almost twenty-four hours on the road, They’re too tired to continue, and they decide to stop for a rest. They stop at a nice hotel and take a room, but they only plan to sleep for four hours and then get back ... Читать далее...
24. There was a boy who worked in the produce section of the marketThere was a boy who worked in the produce section of the market. One day, a man came in and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce, but the man replied that he did not need a whole head, but only a ... Читать далее...
25. Want some of this?Mongo’s old lady decided she wanted t do something special to please him on his birthday, so she bought a pair of crotchless panties. That night, as he came into the house, she lay sprawled on the couch spread-eagle. «Hi hon,» she purred sexily. «Y’all want some of this?» «Hell, no!» he hollered. «Look at ... Читать далее...
26. Movie theater popcorn costs more than fillet mignonMovie theater popcorn apparently costs more per ounce than fillet mignon. You’re probably aware that if you go to the movies these days, you should probably show up well fed. Concession stand snacks and drinks are downright expensive, and if you see a lot of movies, you’ve probably considered sneaking your own into the theater. ... Читать далее...
27. Work EnvironmentWork Environment: (Wise manager) + (Wise employee) = PROFIT (Wise manager) + (Dumb employee) = PRODUCTION (Dumb manager) + (Wise employee) = PROMOTION (Dumb manager) + (Dumb employee) = OVERTIME...
28. Equally qualifiedYoung man Murphy applied for an engineering position at an Irish firm based in Dublin. An American applied for the same job and both applicants having the same qualifications were asked to take a test by the Department manager. Upon completion of the test both men only missed one of the questions. The manager went ... Читать далее...
29. A Visit to the TheatreТопик Посещение театра познакомит вас с понятием «театр» и теми немногими правилами, которых придерживаются зрители при его посещении. Согласно крылатому выражению «Театр начинается с вешалки», любой спектакль начинается с момента входа зрителей в здание театра – это очень интересно и увлекательно. We have a very beatiful theatre in our town. It is a modern building ... Читать далее...
30. Getting Rid of Bugs and RodentsApartment Manager: This is the one-bedroom apartment we have for rent. Let me show you around. Sherin: Wait! Did you see that? It looked like a Mouse or a Rat. Apartment Manager: There aren’t any Rodents or any other Vermin in this Apartment complex. I make sure of that. Sherin: Are you sure? Apartment Manager: ... Читать далее...
31. Question answer 02Why should you be careful playing against a team of big cats? They might be cheetahs! Manager: Our new midfielder cost ten million. I call him our wonder player Fan: Why’s that? Manager: Everytime he plays I wonder why I bothered to buy him! Why do artists never when they play football? They keep drawing! ... Читать далее...
32. A man goes to his bank manager and saysA man goes to his bank manager and says «I’d like to start a small business how do I go about it?» The bank manager leans back and clasps his hands together on his gut and replies «Buy a big one and wait»...
33. Mr. Jones had hired a new secretaryMr. Jones had hired a new secretary. She was young, sweet and very polite. While taking dictation one morning, she noticed that his fly was open. Upon leaving the room she said, «Mr. Jones, your barracks door is open.» He was puzzled by her remark, but later that day he noticed that his zipper was ... Читать далее...
34. Значение идиомы under wraps[under wraps] {adv.} or {adj. phr.} Not allowed to be seen untilthe right time; not allowed to act or speak freely; in secrecy;hidden. — Usually used with «keep». We have a new player, hut weare keeping him under wraps until the game. What the President isplanning will be kept under wraps until tomorrow. The spy ... Читать далее...
35. Перевод слова admitAdmit — допускать, соглашаться, признаваться, сознаваться Перевод слова To admit a claim — признать справедливость претензии to admit light — пропускать свет to admit to the country — разрешить въезд в страну This, I Admit, is true. Это, надо признать, является правдой. She was Admitted to the university. Ее приняли в университет. The manager Admitted ... Читать далее...
36. Two couples decide to spend the weekend away togetherTwo couples decide to spend the weekend away together at a posh hotel. When they get there, one guy suggests they indulge in partner-swapping as a trial. After 2 hours of solid sex by the fireside, the guy turned to his new partner and said, «Wow! This is the very best sex I had in ... Читать далее...
37. A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first dayA young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, «Your first job will be to sweep out the store.» «But I’m a college graduate.» the young man replied indignantly. «Oh, I’m sorry. I ... Читать далее...
38. The Colonel’s OrderA COLONEL ISSUED THE FOLLOWING DIRECTIVE TO HIS EXECUTIVE OFFICERS: «Tomorrow evening at approximately 2000 hours Halley’s Comet will be visible in this area; an event which occurs only every 75 years. Have the men fall out in the battalion area in fatigues, and I will explain this rare phenomenon to them. In case of ... Читать далее...
39. Question answer 03What’s the chilliest ground in the premiership? Cold Trafford! How did the footbal pitch end up as triangle? Somebody took a corner! Why didn’t the dog want to play football? It was a boxer! What did they call Dracula when he won the league? The champire! Which England player keeps up the fuel supply? Paul ... Читать далее...
40. London TrafficLondon is so large that visitors must learn to use buses and the underground to get about. London taxis are too expensive for any but the rich. You can get a map of the underground and the bus routes at any ticket office. The word «Underground» across a large circle shows you where the stations ... Читать далее...