A degree at Life University

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1. Top ten things not to say on your Anniversary 10. I stopped caring about anniversaries when you stopped caring about cooking. 9. Today is our what? 8. Okay, let’s celebrate, but do we have to celebrate together? 7. I thought we only celebrated important events? 6. You can celebrate anniversaries with your next husband. 5. You don’t like what I pick out, so I […]...
2. University courses for men and women Whatsamatta University’s Seminars For Men Fall Catalogue Once again, the female staff at Whatsamatta University will be offering courses for men of all marital status in an attempt to help males and females understand each other better. Attendance in at least 10 of the following is required. 1. Combatting Stupidity 2. You Too Can Do […]...
3. Перевод слова schedule Schedule – расписание, график, план Перевод слова Schedule time – время по расписанию on schedule – точно по расписанию, вовремя delivery schedule – календарный план поставок to deliver on schedule – доставлять по графику I lost my class Schedule. Я потерял расписание моих занятий. My Schedule is very flexible. У меня очень гибкий график работы. […]...
4. Значение идиомы on schedule [on schedule ] {adv. phr.} As planned or expected; at the righttime. The school bus arrived at school on schedule. The fourseasons arrive on schedule each year. Compare: ON TIME....
5. SCHEDULE OF A MAN A MAN’S SCHEDULE 1. Get up. 2. Pass gas. 3. Drink cup of black coffee. 4. Pass gas. 5. Dress, skipping shower because “alarm didn’t work”. 6. Pass gas. 7. Log on to computer to check porn site before leaving for work. Pass gas while “enjoying” favorite site. 6. Drive to work. Pass gas at […]...
6. New University Promos It was clear that one day the Ivy League would grow desperate. The the average tuition (per year) for each institution is outta site and they just aren’t getting enough applicants. I understand that in a rash, unprecedented move, some colleges are taking out advertising in the middle of ‘Sesame Street’ episodes, to differentiate themselves […]...
7. Seasons and Weather Everyone knows that there are four seasons in a year: Spring, summer, autumn and winter. Each of them lasts 8 Months. Spring comes in March and ends in May. It often rains in Spring, especially in April. Summer is the hottest season in the year. It begins in June and ends in August. In summer […]...
8. Seminars for Men COURSE 001 Combating Stupidity COURSE 002 You Too Can Do Housework COURSE 003 PMS – Learn When To Keep Your Mouth Shut COURSE 004 How To Fill An Ice Tray COURSE 005 We Do Not Want Sleazy Underthings For Christmas COURSE 006 Wonderful Laundry Techniques (Formerly – Don’t Wash My Silks) COURSE 007 Understanding The […]...
9. Seasons and Months A year is the average time it takes for the Earth to go once round the Sun. There are 12 months or 52 weeks or 365 days in a year. Every four years there is a leap year. It has 366 days. The names of the months are: January, February, March, April, May, June, July, […]...
10. Reading a Bus Schedule This was my first visit to McQuillanville. I wanted to avoid driving, so I decided to take the bus around the city. However, I was having some trouble figuring out the Bus schedule. Louisa: Excuse me, could you help me read this bus schedule? Curt: I can try. Where do you want to go? Louisa: […]...
11. The definition of a phallic symbol This girl walks in to a doctors office and she asks “Whats a failic symbol? Doctor says “you’re kidding..” Girl says “no! I don’t know! Whats a failic symbol???” Doctor pulls his pants and underwear down and says “You see? This is a failic symbol!” Girl says “Oh! Its just like a penis, only smaller”...
12. Books in Our Life (2) We can’t imagine our life without books. They play a very important part in our life. Books are our friends. We meet them when we are very small and can’t read, but we remember our mother read them for us. We learn very much from books. Books educate people in different spheres of life. They […]...
13. American University Grading Procedures Here is a list of the ways professors here at the American University grade their final exams: DEPT OF STATISTICS: – All grades are plotted along the normal bell curve. DEPT OF PSYCHOLOGY: – Students are asked to blot ink in their exam books, close them and turn them in. The professor opens the books […]...
14. Married life is very frustrating Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen....
15. Перевод слова understanding Understanding – понимание Перевод слова Literal understanding of the text – буквальное понимание текста mutual understanding – взаимопонимание, согласие superficial understanding – поверхностное понимание The experience enriched her Understanding. Этот случай добавил ей понимания. I knew I could count on his Understanding. Я знал, что могу рассчитывать на его понимание. It exceeds the power of […]...
16. Значение идиомы drag on [drag on] or [drag out] {v.} 1. To pass very slowly. The cold winter months dragged on until we thought spring would never come. 2. To prolong; make longer. The meeting would have been over quickly if the members had not dragged out the argument about dues....
17. Come Rain or Shine There are four seasons in a year: spring, summer, autumn and winter. December, January and February are winter months. Days are short and nights are long. The weather is cold, rivers and lakes are usually frozen. The ground is covered with snow, so a lot of people go skating and skiing. Also it is pleasant […]...
18. “Мой университет” (My University) I think everybody knows that education is necessary to be successful in our life. I would like to work in the field of physical culture and sports in future and to become a professional sportsman and a basketball coach. To get my profession I need a university graduation. So after finishing school I passed the […]...
19. Reading in My Life В топике Чтение в моей жизни я рассказываю, какую большую роль играют книги и чтение разнообразной литературы в моей жизни. Есть незабываемые книги, даже с самого детства, когда мы старались походить на любимых героев. Среди множества жанров, каждый найдет подходящий именно для него, ведь все люди разные. Для любителей чтения существуют библиотеки, записаться туда очень […]...
20. Books in Our Life “Books and friends should be few but good,” says an English proverb. “Except a living man there is nothing more wonderful than a book! They teach us and open their hearts to us as brothers,” wrote Charles Kingsley, an English writer of the 19th century. The book is certainly one of the greatest human inventions. […]...
21. Books in my life (3) There is an English proverb that says, “Books and friends should be few but good”. And “Except a living man there is nothing more wonderful than a book!” I totally agree with it. Any book is a wonderful thing! Just imagine – it may seem that it’s just paper pages with a cover and letters […]...
22. Books in my life (2) В топике Книги в моей жизни (2) я рассказываю о том, что я привык к книгам с самого раннего детства, а когда я научился читать, мне нравились книги про животных, природу, детей. Став старше, я стал читать много книг о путешествиях, а сейчас я полюбил книги о науке. Книги играют очень важную роль в моей […]...
23. Art in our life – Искусство в нашей жизни Art plays an important role in my life. It aids the people`s understanding of their culture. No doubt tastes should be developed through images of high artistic culture, whereas works of popular culture as a rule meet consumer`s tastes. In my opinion the habit of looking at good pictures is in itself a means by […]...
24. Family Life – Семейная жизнь Family is very important for every person. It’s a special unit of society, which matters the most. The human nature has a need to always communicate, to have friends, partners and children, to share emotions and experience. So, loneliness is a bit unnatural for people. For this reasons everybody has a family. It isn’t surprising […]...
25. Oxford – the University Town This university town is very beautiful. The oldest university there is Oxford. The first of its colleges was founded in 1249. The university now has thirty-five colleges and about thirteen thousand students, many of them from other countries. There were no women at Oxford until 1878. When the first women’s college Lady Margaret Hall, opened. […]...
26. Перевод слова spring Spring – весна; пружина, скачок, прыгать; источник, родник Перевод слова To rise with a spring – вскочить spring water – ключевая вода to spring up into the air – подскочить в воздух the spring semester – весенний семестр His daughter Sprang to his embrace. Дочь бросилась ему в объятья. He Sprang from the bed. Он […]...
27. Studying English grammar First of all, grammar is a main component of any language in the world. Without grammar, you can’t understand, for example, the time of action whether it happened in the past or in the present. So, it has a fundamental role in the language. Really, it is beyond description how much important to know the […]...
28. Public Holidays in the United Kingdom There are eight public holidays, or bank holidays a year in Great Britain, that is days on which people need not go to work. They are: Christmas Day, Boxing Day, New Year’s Day, Good Friday, Easter Monday, May Day, Spring Bank Holiday and Late Summer Bank Holiday. The term “bank holiday” dates back to the […]...
29. A psychology student at a local university A psychology student at a local university was sent on a field assignment to evaluate three patients in a local mental hospital. The first patient was locked in his room throwing tennis balls everywhere. The student asked why, and the patient answered “When I get out of here I going to ba a tennis pro.” […]...
30. English throughout My Life – Английский язык в моей жизни To begin with, it should be mentioned that studying English has already become an inseparable part of my life. I am sure this language is like a “lucky ticket” to my future life. Ludwig Wittgenstein said, “The limits of my language are the limits of my Universe”. And that’s really so because knowledge of different […]...
31. At a Texas University, a Professor had been teaching his At a Texas University, a Professor had been teaching his students human reproduction. For an exam, one of the questions was: “Female humans are born with a limited number of eggs, while males, during their lifetime, produce millions upon millions of sperm. Why are so many sperm produced?” One young woman’s answer: “Because they won’t […]...
32. Getting an Online Degree Carlos: So where are you planning on attending college? Torrie: I’ve picked Harford University. Carlos: The only Harford University I’ve heard of is a Degree mill. Torrie: I’m sure it’s not the same one. The Harford University I’m attending is Accredited, at least I’m pretty sure it is. The best part of going to Harford […]...
33. Значение идиомы third degree [third degree] {n. phr.} A method of severe grilling used toextract information from an arrested suspect. “Why give me thethird degree?” he asked indignantly. “All I did was come home latebecause I had a drink with my friends.”...
34. Значение идиомы to a degree [to a degree] {adv. phr.} 1. {Chiefly British} Very; to a largeextent. In some things I am ignorant to a degree. 2. Somewhat;slightly; in a small way; rather. His anger was, to a degree, aconfession of defeat. To a degree, Mary was to blame for Bob’sfailing mathematics, because he spent much time with her when […]...
35. Перевод слова degree Degree – степень, уровень, градус Перевод слова Degree of complexity – степень сложности in some degree – в некоторой степени academic degree – научная степень The Degree of risk is minimal. Степень риска минимальна. Preheat the oven to 425 Degrees. Предварительно разогрейте духовку до 425 градусов. Applicants must have a Degree in Engineering. Кандидаты должны […]...
36. Значение идиомы to the nth degree [to the nth degree] {adv. phr.} To the greatest degree possible;extremely; very much so. Scales must be accurate to the nthdegree. His choice of words was exactly to the nth degree....
37. Фразовый глагол pass off – перевод и значение, пример использования Фразовый глагол: pass off Перевод: сбывать, подсовывать; выдавать Пример: He tried to pass the fake watch off as a real Rolex. Он пытался выдать поддельные часы за настоящий Ролекс....
38. A high school senior was inspecting Harvard University A high school senior was inspecting Harvard University, where he hoped to attend the following autumn. As he was walking across the Quad, he stopped a distinguished-looking man and asked: “Sir, can you please tell me where your library is at?” The man looked down his nose and replied: “Son, I’m head of the English […]...
39. Hick computer terms Redneck computer terms Log On: Makin’ the wood stove hotter. Log Off: Don’t add no wood. Monitor: Keepin’ an eye on the wood stove. Download: Gettin’ the firewood off the pickup. Mega Hertz: When yer not careful down loadin’. Floppy Disk: Whatcha git from pilin’ too much firewood. Ram: The hydrolic thingy that splits the […]...
40. My Favourite Holiday В топике Мой любимый праздник – я расскажу о праздниках в нашей стране и о Новом годе – моем самом любимом празднике. Среди многих праздников (1 Мая, 8 Марта, День Независимости России, День Конституции России и многих других), больше всего я люблю Новый год, отмечаемый 31 декабря. Для меня этот праздник – долгожданный день чудес, […]...