Young Amanpreet never quite got over his miserable

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1. This young lady, a flighty young thing This young lady, a flighty young thing, got a job cleaning the bank windows in the evening after the bank closed for business. Anyway, she was up this ladder, cleaning good and proper and as she was in the habit of wearing no knickers, every young man who would come along would stop and stare […]...
2. A young man joined the Army and signed up with the paratroopers A young man joined the Army and signed up with the paratroopers. He went though the standard training, completed the practice jumps from higher and higher structures, and finally went to take his first jump from an airplane. The next day, he called home to his father to tell him the news. “So, did you […]...
3. One man came to gun shop One man (lets call him Johnny) came to gun shop. J(ohnny):I want a pistol S(alesman):Choose from this wall (points at wall full of pistols) J: (points at biggest pistol) I want this, S: An.44 Magnum? And for what purpose? J: For shooting cans. S: (points on smaller handgun) For shooting cans is the best this […]...
4. An old man of 70 married a young girl of 18 An old man of 70 married a young girl of 18. When they got into bed the night after the wedding, he held up three fingers. “Oh honey”, said the young nymph, “Does that mean we’re going to do it three times?” “No”, said the old man, “It means you can take your pick.”...
5. High military ranks When little Reggie was inducted into the Army, he was advised to act tough. “That’s the only way to command respect in the Army,” his friends said. So Reggie did his best to carry out the advice. He swaggered all around camp, bragging, blustering and talking out of the corner of his mouth. “Show me […]...
6. Перевод слова garbage Garbage – отбросы, мусор Перевод слова Garbage dump – мусорная свалка to collect the garbage – собирать мусор to dispose of garbage – избавляться от мусора Please take out the Garbage. Пожалуйста, вынеси мусор. Throw the can in the Garbage. Выбрось банку в мусор. The fee pays for Garbage pickup. Этот сбор платят за вывоз […]...
7. There once was a young Irish woman who went to confession There once was a young Irish woman who went to confession. Upon entering the confessional she said, “Forgive me Father, for I have sinned.” The priest said, “Confess your sins and be forgiven.” The young woman said, “Last night my boyfriend made mad passionate love to me seven times.” The priest thought long and hard […]...
8. The Young Mans Big Mouth The Young Man’s Big Mouth A young man goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says the condoms come in packs of 3, 9 or 12 and asks which the young man wants. “Well,” he said, “I’ve been seeing this girl for a while and she’s really hot. I want the condoms […]...
9. A young punk gets on the cross-town bus A young punk gets on the cross-town bus. He’s got spiked, multicoloured hair that’s green, purple and orange. His clothes are a tattered mix of leather rags. His legs are bare and he’s wearing worn-out shoes. His entire face and body are riddled with pierced jewellery and his earring are big, bright feathers. He sits […]...
10. A young girl is with her dad at the barbers A young girl is with her dad at the barbers eating some candy, when it slips from her fingers into a pile of hair on the floor. “Oh dear, have you got hair on your candy?” asked the barber. “Don’t be so stupid, I’m only three!!” said the girl!...
11. A young wife, her boorish husband and a young good looking A young wife, her boorish husband and a young good looking sailor were shipwrecked on an island. One morning, the sailor climbed a tall coconut tree and yelled, “Stop making love down there!” “What’s the matter with you?” the husband said when the sailor climbed down. “We weren’t making love.” “Sorry,” said the sailor, “From […]...
12. A Jewish young man was seeing a psychiatrist A Jewish young man was seeing a psychiatrist for an eating and sleeping disorder. “I am so obsessed with my mother… As soon as I go to sleep, I start dreaming, and everyone in my dream turns into my mother. I wake up in such a state, all I can do is go downstairs and […]...
13. Перевод слова young Young – молодой, юный Перевод слова Robust young man – здоровый крепкий юноша young fellow – молодой человек young idea – свежая идея A Young cat is a kitten. Маленькую кошку называют котенком. He looks Young for his age. Он выглядит молодо для своего возраста. The lioness fought to protect her Young. Львица дралась, чтобы […]...
14. Giving sad news to a troop The Captain called the Sergeant in. “Sarge, I just got a telegram that Private Jones’ mother died yesterday. Better go tell him and send him in to see me.” So the Sergeant calls for his morning formation and lines up all the troops. “Listen up, men,” says the Sergeant. “Johnson, report to the mess hall […]...
15. A young kid’s in a shipwreck and he winds up stranded A young kid’s in a shipwreck and he winds up stranded on a tropical island. For twenty years he never sees another human being. Then one day a beautiful girl with long blond hair, her clothes half-ripped off, washes up on a piece of driftwood. He explains to her how he existed for twenty years, […]...
16. The young couple was engaged in a most affectionate The young couple was engaged in a most affectionate embrace when there came the sound of a key in the front door. The young lady broke away at once, eyes wide with alarm. “Heavens,” she cried, “it’s my husband! Quick, jump out the window.” The young man, equally alarmed, made a quick step toward the […]...
17. Two young girls were talking about their sex lives Two young girls were talking about their sex lives when the first girl says, “Oh my god! , it was really great, but I was Sooo scared after his rubber broke. I didn’t get a good night’s sleep for a week.” “What happened.” Says her intrigued friend. “I didn’t know what I was going to […]...
18. A young man was staying on a farm with his uncle and aunt A young man was staying on a farm with his uncle and aunt for the summer. One morning the aunt and uncle walked in the kitchen and the young man was drinking an extremely large glass of milk. The young man said “I took the liberty of milking your cow this morning!” He then continues […]...
19. Several weeks after a young man had been hired Several weeks after a young man had been hired, he was called into the personnel director’s office. “What is the meaning of this?” the director asked. “When you applied for this job, you told us you had five years experience. Now we discovered this is the first job you’ve ever held.” “Well,” the young man […]...
20. For three years, the young attorney had been taking his For three years, the young attorney had been taking his brief vacations at this country inn. The last time he’d finally managed an affair with the innkeeper’s daughter. Looking forward to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the inn, then stopped short. There sat his lover with an infant […]...
21. One day this old man was about to have sex with a young girl One day this old man was about to have sex with a young girl which he did not know. The old man began to put on his condom when the young girl asked him why is he putting one on. She said “you don’t have to worry about getting me pregnant because you are too […]...
22. A young girl had not been feeling well A young girl had not been feeling well and went to her family doctor. “Young lady,” the doctor began, “you’re pregnant.” “But that can’t be. The only men I’ve been with are nudists and in, our colony we practice sex only with our eyes.” “Well my dear,” said the doctor, “someone in that colony is […]...
23. A gentler way At the morning roll call at Fort Dix, the sergeant called out, “Platoon, atten-HUT! Private Martinez, report to the office. Your brother died last night.” The Chaplain, Rabbi Horowitz, looked on in horror. “Sergeant,” he said afterwards, “that’s a rather cruel and unfeeling way to break tragic news. We must be more gentle and less […]...
24. A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day A young man, hired by a supermarket, reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep out the store.” “But I’m a college graduate.” the young man replied indignantly. “Oh, I’m sorry. I […]...
25. Значение идиомы lounge lizard [lounge lizard] {n. phr.} A well-dressed male fortune hunter whosits around in bars and other public places, and attends many socialevents to try to pick up wealthy women through smart conversation. Harry has the reputation of being a lounge lizard; he is looking fora rich wife....
26. The young playboy took a blind date to an The young playboy took a blind date to an amusement park. They went for a ride on the Ferris wheel. The ride completed, she seemed rather bored. “What would you like to do next?” he asked. “I wanna be weighed,” she said. So the young man took her over to the weight guesser. “One-twelve,” said […]...
27. The young playboy took a blind date to an amusement park The young playboy took a blind date to an amusement park. They went for a ride on the Ferris wheel. The ride completed, she seemed rather bored. “What would you like to do next?” he asked. “I wanna be weighed,” she said. So the young man took her over to the weight guessed. “One-twelve,” said […]...
28. An attractive young girl, chaperoned by an ugly old lady An attractive young girl, chaperoned by an ugly old lady, entered the doctor’s office. “We have come for an examination,” said the young girl. “Alright,” said the doctor. “Go behind that curtain and take your clothes off.” “No, not me,” said the girl. “it’s my old aunt here.” “Very well,” said the doctor. “Madam, stick […]...
29. A young lady walks into a doctors office A young lady walks into a doctors office. “Doctor I’m suffering from a terrible discharge” The Doctor lays her down lifts up her dress and has a good probe around and says “how does that feel?” Young lady, “Oooh doctor that feels lovely….. …but the discharge is from my ear!!”...
30. One day, a young cowboy and a cowgirl decided One day, a young cowboy and a cowgirl decided to get married. He was a man of the world and she was an innocent bride with no experience. On the first night of their honeymoon the couple washed up and started to get ready for bed. When they get into bed, they start exploring each […]...
31. A miserable rooster A salesman is talking to a farmer when he looks over and sees a rooster wearing pants, a shirt, and suspenders. He says, “What the hell is that all about?” The farmer says, “We had a fire in the chicken coop and all his feathers got singed off, so the wife made him some clothes […]...
32. A young boy on his way home from school must pass by a group A young boy on his way home from school must pass by a group of hookers. Everyday as he passes them, the hookers wave at him with their pinkies and say “Hi there little boy!!” One day the boy stops and asks one of the hookers why they always wave at him with their pinkies. […]...
33. President Clinton, returning from a campaign stop President Clinton, returning from a campaign stop in Arkansas, is climbing the steps to board Air Force One. Under each arm he is carrying a souvenir of his trip – a live razorback. At the top of the jetway, he is met by the guard, a Marine sergeant, who issues a crisp salute. “I’d salute […]...
34. A recruit who wasn’t really meant to be a soldier A recruit who wasn’t really meant to be a soldier went out to the rifle range for the first time. He missed every target and most of the hills behind them. Despondent, he said to the sergeant, “I think I’ll just go and shoot myself.” The sergeant said, “Better take a couple of extra bullets!”...
35. The young lady entered the doctor’s office carrying an infant The young lady entered the doctor’s office carrying an infant. “Doctor,” she explained, “the baby seems to be ailing. Instead of gaining weight, he lost three ounces this week.” The medic examined the child and then started to squeeze the girl’s breasts. He then unbuttoned her blouse, removed the bra and began powerfully sucking on […]...
36. Marrying Young Irene: Damon and his girlfriend just got Engaged. They’re planning on getting Married this summer. Ken: They’re too young! Marrying young Poses all kinds of problems. Irene: Such as? Ken: Such as the two of them lacking Maturity. They may think it’s fun To play house right now, but they’re not prepared to face the […]...
37. Перевод слова message Message – сообщение, письмо; идея Перевод слова Clear message – ясное сообщение coded message – закодированное сообщение a book without a message – несерьезная книга Did you get my Message? Вам передали то, что я просил? I will bear your Message. Я передам вашу информацию. I texted a Message to her. Я написала ей сообщение. […]...
38. Перевод слова hall Hall – зал, холл Перевод слова Concert hall – концертный зал dance hall – дансинг, танцевальный зал music hall – мюзик-холл lecture hall – конференц-зал, аудитория The Hall was half-empty. Зал был наполовину пуст. This Hall will seat 5000. В этом зале 5000 мест. He stopped amidmost of the Hall. Он остановился посреди зала....
39. Studly young Romeo and his dimwitted college sidekick Studly young Romeo and his dimwitted college sidekick are perched near the front door of the girls’ dorm. Several plain Janes walk by as the two converse. Then a Sharon Stone look-alike emerges from the dorm and saunters past. Romeo turns, smiles, and – barely audibly – inquires, “Tickle your ass with a feather?” The […]...
40. Пословица / поговорка you are only young once – перевод и значение, пример использования Пословица / поговорка: you are only young once Перевод: молодость бывает лишь однажды Эквивалент в русском языке: жизнь коротка Пример: The young man’s grandmother believed that you are only young once and encouraged her grandson to do many new things in his life. Бабушка молодого человека считала, что молодость бывает лишь однажды, и она убеждала […]...